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    Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That: A Modern Guide to Manners
    Unavailable
    Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That: A Modern Guide to Manners
    Unavailable
    Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That: A Modern Guide to Manners
    Audiobook5 hours

    Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That: A Modern Guide to Manners

    Published by Hachette Audio

    3/5

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    Currently unavailable

    Currently unavailable

    About this audiobook

    @font-face { font-family: "Times"; }@font-face { font-family: "Geneva"; }p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal { margin: 0in 0in 0.0001pt; font-size: 12pt; font-family: "Times New Roman"; color: black; }div.Section1 { page: Section1; } "We all know bad manners when we see them," NPR and Vanity Fair contributor Henry Alford observes at the beginning of his new book. But what, he asks, do good manners look like in our day and age? When someone answers their cell phone in the middle of dining with you, or runs you off the sidewalk with their doublewide stroller, or you enter a post-apocalyptic public restroom, the long-revered wisdom of Emily Post can seem downright prehistoric. Troubled by the absence of good manners in his day-to-day life-by the people who clip their toenails on the subway or give three-letter replies to one's laboriously crafted missives-Alford embarks on a journey to find out how things might look if people were on their best behavior a tad more often. He travels to Japan (the "Fort Knox Reserve" of good manners) to observe its culture of collective politesse. He interviews etiquette experts both likely (Judith Martin, Tim Gunn) and unlikely (a former prisoner, an army sergeant). He plays a game called Touch the Waiter. And he volunteers himself as a tour guide to foreigners visiting New York City in order to do ground-level reconnaissance on cultural manners divides. Along the way (in typical Alford style) he also finds time to teach Miss Manners how to steal a cab; designates the World's Most Annoying Bride; and tosses his own hat into the ring, volunteering as an online etiquette coach. Ultimately, by tackling the etiquette questions specific to our age-such as Why shouldn't you ask a cab driver where's he's from?, Why is posting baby pictures on Facebook a fraught activity? and What's the problem with "No problem"?-Alford finds a wry and warm way into a subject that has sometimes been seen as pedantic or elitist. And in this way, he looks past the standard "dos" and "don'ts" of good form to present an illuminating, seriously entertaining book about grace and civility, and how we can simply treat each other better.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherHachette Audio
    Release dateJan 3, 2012
    ISBN9781611135633
    Unavailable
    Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That: A Modern Guide to Manners

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    Reviews for Would It Kill You to Stop Doing That

    3/5

    38 ratings7 reviews

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    • 3/5
      This was a bit of a disappointment. I don't think Alford had a solid idea of what he wanted the book to be, so it felt disjointed and scattered. It was more of a book of him discovering the various aspects of manners (advice columns, local customs, the history of manners). The book starts off with him visiting Japan to learn the local customs, which was quite interesting, and I wish the book would have talked more about his experiences in different countries. Instead, he went off on his own (nonprofessional) thoughts on the subject, decided to try writing advice columns, and talked about his experiences in New York giving foreigners tours (sorry, visits). The unfocused feeling of the book just left me cold, even with bits of humor sprinkled here and there.
    • 4/5
      This was an interesting book. I was expecting something along the lines of a Miss Manners style, and was pleasantly surprised at the rather modern urbane approach. I also like that Mr. Alford treated his gayness as part of his state of being, without much ado. It gives me hope that being gay is moving into the mainstream.On the other hand, the writing style was rather convoluted at times. Comments seemed like "in-jokes" and I had to reread several sections/paragraphs/sentences searching for meaning, and just abandoned some of them. If I hadn't been reading for amusement on a rainy holiday, I might have tossed the book aside.
    • 4/5
      A vivid, at times rather witty description of the author's own experiences, as opposed to just a list of good manners; also, more subjective than otherwise. Loved the first chapter - on good manners (or just a way of life, often curious, but in a good way) in Japan.
    • 4/5
      Funny, engaging, timely, and pertinent - Alford does a good job of presenting his ideas about manners in broad strokes, making them relevant to and accessible by all of us. Lots of chuckle-out-loud moments, balanced by several ideas profound yet simple. A very enjoyable read.
    • 2/5
      I wanted to like this book - what a great title! - but in the thirty-seven pages I was able to get through, the author displayed an astounding collection of racism, sexism, and classism, a near-total ignorance of history, and an irritating fascination with his own ability to be clever. Oh, well.
    • 4/5
      60 pages in to this book and I thought I'd made a mistake.
      I was thinking that it was written for a gay man who carries around a copy of the New Yorker while listening to NPR - basically - not me. I was just not "getting it."

      But I have this odd quirk of insisting that I finish a book no matter how much I dislike it. I figure that I force students to do it, so I'd better not be a hypocrite.
      Anyway - as I continued through the book, I found myself laughing out loud every few pages and wishing that the author was my neighbor.
      There is some interesting information here and the author did some research on the subject. But what this book is really like is having a smart friend over for a few drinks who is an exceptionally gifted - and hilarious - storyteller.
    • 2/5
      Henry Alford is screamingly funny. Sometimes.
      He cares about manners which is a good thing.
      He confuses charm with manners which leads to long digressions and redundant observations.
      When I began the book, I thought, oh good, an up to date guide on how to comport oneself online, at the office, with transsexuals, etc. Then as I read on, I thought, Oh, a book for young metrosexuals. Then I groaned, oh no a bunch of loosely connected musings on all sorts of social situations including having online exchanges about your plants. Finally, I realized, this is a book about Henry Alford with a misleading subtitle.

      The tip off was the description of a game called "Touch the Waiter." What a rude unfunny way to behave, and how bizarre to trumpet it in your "guide to manners." It is almost a how-to in what not to do to have good manners.

      What is especially confusing about this book is that it has an index but no bibliography even though Alford refers to many superior sources such as Miss Manners, Thom Gunn, etc. A bibliography would have redeemed the thing for me. It could also have used table of contents. (Okay, I am a librarian and I like to know where to shelve things. Does this go next to David Sedaris --essay collections-- or next to Letitia Baldridge- etiquette guides?) Is there an editor at that publishing house? Someone who for example might have reduced the number of times Alford writes certain anecdotes or tells unfunny jokes?

      So in the end, I fault the publisher more than the author.