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I Kiss Your Hands Many Times: Hearts, Souls, and Wars in Hungary
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I Kiss Your Hands Many Times: Hearts, Souls, and Wars in Hungary
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I Kiss Your Hands Many Times: Hearts, Souls, and Wars in Hungary
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I Kiss Your Hands Many Times: Hearts, Souls, and Wars in Hungary

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

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A magnificent wartime love story about the forces that brought the author's parents together and those that nearly drove them apart

Marianne Szegedy-Maszák's parents, Hanna and Aladár, met and fell in love in Budapest in 1940. He was a rising star in the foreign ministry-a vocal anti-Fascist who was in talks with the Allies when he was arrested and sent to Dachau. She was the granddaughter of Manfred Weiss, the industrialist patriarch of an aristocratic Jewish family that owned factories, were patrons of intellectuals and artists, and entertained dignitaries at their baronial estates. Though many in the family had converted to Catholicism decades earlier, when the Germans invaded Hungary in March 1944, they were forced into hiding. In a secret and controversial deal brokered with Heinrich Himmler, the family turned over their vast holdings in exchange for their safe passage to Portugal.

Aladár survived Dachau, a fragile and anxious version of himself. After nearly two years without contact, he located Hanna and wrote her a letter that warned that he was not the man she'd last seen, but he was still in love with her. After months of waiting for visas and transit, she finally arrived in a devastated Budapest in December 1945, where at last they were wed.

Framed by a cache of letters written between 1940 and 1947, Szegedy-Maszák's family memoir tells the story, at once intimate and epic, of the complicated relationship Hungary had with its Jewish population-the moments of glorious humanism that stood apart from its history of anti-Semitism-and with the rest of the world. She resurrects in riveting detail a lost world of splendor and carefully limns the moral struggles that history exacted-from a country and its individuals.

LanguageEnglish
Release dateAug 27, 2013
ISBN9780449010143
Unavailable
I Kiss Your Hands Many Times: Hearts, Souls, and Wars in Hungary

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Reviews for I Kiss Your Hands Many Times

Rating: 4.175678378378379 out of 5 stars
4/5

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  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Very well done.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    For anyone with Hungarian roots, this book is a must-read. The meticulous research in this documentary shines a light on the lives of a family entrenched in political and financial power in Hungary, and how their influence was affected by the Nazi occupation.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I got this book free through LibraryThing's Early Reviewers program.I didn't like this book as much as I had hoped I would. Secondary Holocaust memoirs (that is, those written by the children or grandchildren of survivors) rarely do it for me. The author's mother was Jewish and her father, a gentile. Her mother went into hiding during the Holocaust and her father was imprisoned in Dachau.This book I had a hard time finishing and probably would not have done if I didn't have to write a review. I think it was just too long for me; the post-war period in particular, after everything settled down, as covered in WAY too much detail. Nevertheless people interested in the Holocaust in Hungary might want to check it out.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    One of the problems so many family history memoirs suffer from is a lack of framing and contextualization. Children or grandchildren find a cache of letters, through them together with some photo inserts, and -- POOF! -- a book.

    "I Kiss Your Hands Many Times," thankfully, does not suffer from this problem. The author does an outstanding job of crafting an actual story out of the primary source materials. The tale she weaves is captivating and feels fresh compared to the countless other child-of-survivors books out there.

    I am very pleaded to have received my copy through the First Reads program and recommend it to other readers with an interest in survivor stories, Central/Eastern European studies, and family history
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I Kiss Your Hands is a richly composed memoir of one family and the mutual impact of the turmoil in Hungary. I agree with the earlier reviewer that a family tree or outline would have been helpful initially with the introduction of so many key persons. I found myself flipping back a few times to refresh my mind on the names. Once I worked out the characters in my head, the book read smoothly. The author is rich and indulgent in her writing style, offering a book that is meant to be "sipped not gulped" with appreciation. I would recommend this book to anyone who enjoys reading the human side of history.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Another book about World War II. Another book that shows the very personal and private effects politics and war bring about. A real story set before and during the Second World War this book gives yet another account of tragedy and survival. It's written in a near objective style, as if it's just another historical account. At times this might make the reader feel distanced, but overall this was a very wise choice because it lets the reader find his/her own connection to the story. Like other historical accounts the amount of historical facts, figures, and documents can be overwhelming and confusing. The love story and the biographical trunk this book is based on keeps it relevant and gives an understanding of history that plain facts and data cannot achieve. Being told by the next generation in this family shows the inter-generational effects of politics and war as well as personal decisions ancestors made for sheer survival. Overall, this is a book, one of many, that brings a face and soul to a time seemingly devoid of humanity. It shows the true cost of war, any war. As such it deserves to be read.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I Kiss Your Hands Many Times by Marianne Szegedy-Maszak is the memoir of her family which spans pre and post WW II in Hungary. Her mother, Hanna, came from a family of great wealth. Her father, Aladar, was working for the foreign ministry when they met in Budapest in 1940. The couple fell in love. After the Germans invaded Hungary, Aladar was sent to Dachau. He barely survived the ordeal and came out a changed man. He wrote to Hanna, after two years of silence, and tells her he still loves her and proposes marriage. Eventually, they begin a new life in America. While this is the story of their great love for one another it is also the story of Aladar's love and devotion to Hungary. There is a great deal of European and Hungarian historical information in the book which makes for interesting reading and provides perspective. This is a fascinating book and I recommend reading it.I received this book free of charge through LibraryThing and I give this review of my own free will.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book tells the story of struggle and survival of a prominent family in Hungary during the holocaust. The author's family has one branch that is Jewish and one branch that is Catholic. They have members who are large business owners and also connected to the Hungarian government. This helps them to an extent as the Nazis have to be somewhat careful in the way they treat them. The author is very unbiased and matter of fact in the way she writes the story of her parents, grandparents and many extended family members. She uses information from diaries, personal papers, letters and government documents to present a very nice tribute to both her family and a large majority of the Hungarian people.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I really liked this book. At first I was worried that it would turn out to be a bodice ripper from the description, but fear not it is a very real history of real people caught up in the horrors of a world gone insane. Through the lives of her parents and their extended families, gentile and Jew, the author examines the cruelty of the politics of hatred as religion, philosophy, and economics combine to twist society inside out. I also loaned this book to my mother, who was born in Hungary before the war and grew up during the events described in this book. She was very taken with the accuracy of Szegedy-Maszak's telling of the events.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I Kiss Your Hand ManyTimes is a beautifully written memoir of the author's family during pre- and post-war World War II. It is the story of Hanna and Aladar, the author's parents, their wealth and loss of it, Aladar's rise and fall in Hungarian politics, their separation when Aladar was sent to Dachau and his surviival, their religions-Catholic and Jew. It is also the story of what happened in Hungary during WWII between the Nazi's and Soviet's and the Hungarian people.Marianne Szegedy-Maszak has written this love story and weaves into it a very accurate and detailed description of what life was like in Hungary during WWII by using her parent's letters to each other as well as actual documents that were kept by her father during his political career.I highly recommend this book. I received this book as an Early Review giveaway.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Marianne Szegedy-Maszak grew up in a family compound in the United States with a fascinating history that she didn't truly understand until after her parents death. This book follows her parents lives in Hungary in the years leading up to and including World War II. Her mother was born into an extremely weatlhy Jewish family while her father rose to prominence in the Hungarian Foreign Affairs Office. Both families had to make terrible sacrifices and lived through extremely terrifying situations during the war and it affected them for the rest of their lives. Sqegedy-Maszak writes with such clarity that it is easy to be swept into this story and she was able to write with such intensity about the weeks leading up to the occupation of Hungary that it was impossible to put down. I truly enjoyed this book and believe that the author did a magnificent job tranforming her family's complicated history into a compellingly readable book.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    This exquisitely beautiful book introduces the reader to the tumultuous period of Hungary's occupation by Hitler and illustrates its devastating effects on one family and on the love story that was complicated by its uncertainty and upheaval. With passages that read as if they were lifted from a romance novel ("your presence is the reason the world looks so lovely") and others from a gory horror story, the story's poignant dichotomy underscores the all-important truth that love conquers all - hate, prejudice, war, famine and devastating, heartbreaking loss. The author introduces us to her large family in the current day and then draws the reader back through time to pre-war Hungary, when they enjoyed a privileged, elite life that sheltered them from the growing unrest arising in the rest of Europe. Composed of men and women who were vital both to the government and to the country's economy, the Szegedy-Maszak and Kornfeld families enjoyed a privileged status that kept them relatively isolated from the early pain throes of the war and, eventually, provided a means of triumph over their degradating humiliation at the hands of the Nazis and the Hungarian gendarme. Before that triumph, however, they, too, suffered from the unspeakable crimes against humanity committed by the Nazis, leaving many of them "wounded for life in [their hearts, in their souls]". Some were interred in labor camps while others were forced to find several hiding places with friends. All were victims of the prejudice and hate that stalked Europe. As their story unfolds, one can't help but feel sorrow and indignation at the fall of the family from its noble beginnings and the agony they suffered. By the end of the war, "everything that once was, [was] over." Despite the extraordinary difficulties that the war threw into their lives, however, young Hanna and Aladar - and the love that blossomed between them - were able to survive and their story is a lovely one. The letters they wrote to each other and their memories of the event, though guarded and still veiled by a sheer curtain of privacy that they kept between themselves and their daughter (the author), weave a spellbinding tale that is almost too touching to be real. With its richly detailed depiction of Hungarian life, culture and politics during the years of the second world war, its emotional account of the family's journey, its terrible descriptions of the concentration camps and their effect on some of the family and its insightful look into the resulting emotional and psychological changes those experiences wrought, I Kiss Your Hands Many Times is a memoir that is well-deserving of high praise. My only quibbles with the book would be the smattering of typographical errors that were present (which, granted, were in a reviewer’s uncorrected proof that I received from the publisher and will be fixed before final release) and the few portions of the book where the narrative is weighted down by just a little bit too much political detail. These faults are minor, however, and can be overlooked because of its overall quality. Certainly worth five stars!
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is, at once, a love story, a history lesson, and a family memoir. The love story is between a young man working in Hungary’s foreign ministry and a young lady who is the grand-daughter of a Jewish Hungarian industrialist, the author’s parents. The history lesson is the tug-of-war for the riches of Hungary’s manufacturing plants and agrarian estates during WWII, the politics of anti-fascists in government trying to evade occupation by the Nazis and trying to get help from the Allies, the tension of trying to walk the political tightrope of place and time, the realization of Hungarian government gradually being taken over by Russians and communists. The family memoir is what the members of the various branches of the family did to survive during the war. Some of the family had converted to Catholicism decades before; some of them remained Jews. This is a story of the torments of war, the disintegration of their home country as they knew it, and the will to survive and carry on.The author uses excerpts from family letters and some pictures in her book. There is a lot of politics, so if you are bored by that, then this is not the book for you. The period of Hungary’s pre-, post- and war-time history comes alive under the author’s pen.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is the intriguing story of Aladar Szegedy-Maszak, as told by his daughter Marianne. He was an anti-Fascist who began his career in the Hungarian Foreign Service, but during World War II was arrested and sent to the concentration camp at Dachau, leaving behind his family and Hanna, a wealthy Jewish girl he would later marry. Although I found the beginning of the book rather slow reading (too much like a history textbook), I’m glad I continued on. A true love story began to emerge, encompassing Aladar and Hanna’s meeting in Budapest in 1940, their emigration to the United States and, finally, his death. This book, which includes excerpts from family letters, contains an important history lesson in the complex and tumultuous events of the war, particularly in Hungary.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I Kiss Your Hands Many Times by Marianne Szegedy-Maszák is an exceptionally well-written and beautiful memoir that will easily draw the reader deep into the complex and at times extraordinarily difficult lives of not only her parents; Hanna and Aladár, but Szegedy-Maszák’s family as well as a history lesson woven into this exceptional book. I Kiss Your Hands Many Times is a book to savor and I found myself rereading passages due to the beauty of the writing. My only regret was not having someone to discuss the book with, which is why I highly recommend book discussion groups push I Kiss Your Hands Many Times to the top of their lists.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    Marianne Szegedy-Maszak’s memoir is a very interesting description of the history of Hungary during the mid-20th Century from the point of view of people who enjoyed a good life in the central European country prior to WWII. In many respects, the book reads like a historical novel following characters whose comfortable and privileged lives are interrupted by the fascists active in Hungary in the late 1930s and early 1940s. It is, however, a memoir written by the daughter of a Jewish mother and Catholic father. Marianne’s mother, Hanna was raised in a Jewish, cosmopolitan, world traveled, and wealthy family who spoke many languages. Marianne’s father, Aladar, was raised in a Catholic, upper middle class family that strongly identified with their Hungarian heritage. Hanna and Aladar met in 1940 in Budapest at a dinner party where fashionable dress, jewelry, and political conversation was the rule. Aladar was 36, unmarried, handsome, and a rising star in the Foreign Ministry. Hannah was 24, a woman who felt somewhat inadequate because she enjoyed an idle life living with her wealthy family. The two people in love were denied a normal courtship because of the growing Antisemitism in Hungary and Hitler’s increasing dissatisfaction with Hungarian politics. Aladar was wary of entering a mixed marriage (Catholic and Jew) that would potentially lead to serious consequences as the Nazis gained more power in Hungary. He tried as a diplomat to help Hungary survive the inevitable domination of the country by the Nazis. But, when the Jews were purged and sent to concentration camps for extermination, he realized the hopelessness of his diplomacy. His resistance eventually got him marginalized as a dissident and he was arrested and sent to Dachau in 1944. Meanwhile, Hannah and her family went into hiding during these years in Budapest fearing for their lives. Eventually, thirty two members of the family are able to leave Hungary with the help of the Nazis after a huge financial payoff from the industrial family’s wealth was made to the Germans.How in the world would Hanna and Adalar ever meet again? After the war, Adalar sent a letter to Hanna. He had survived Dachau and admitted that he was not the man he once was. He was more indecisive and helpless than he was before. But, he still wanted Hannah to tie her fate to him. Receiving the letter, Hanna, whose family had escaped to Portugal, wrote back to Adalar that her fate was cast with him. What fascinated me was the relationship between Adalar and Hanna that had changed significantly as a result of their separation under the gravest hardships. Yet, the bond was strong enough for them to reunite. Adalar clearly was dissociative in his emotions and motivations the rest of his life, living mostly in the refuge of his library and books. He kept a journal (in Hungarian) and wrote many letters chronicling his perceptions and memories. He continued to work and provide for his family. Hanna emerged as the stronger of the two and raised her children and kept the family going, including the emotionally distant Adalar. I have only given a bare skeleton of the memoir. The rich historical detail and insightful biographical stories make I Kiss Your Hands Many Times a very moving book. I highly recommend it.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This book is Szegedy-Maszak’s history/memoir of the Hungarian Kornfeld and Weiss families and the Szegedy-Maszak family, focusing on the courtship of Hanna Kornfeld and Aladar Szegedy-Maszak – Marianne’s parents. The Weiss family, formerly Jewish (but definitely not devout) were fabulously wealthy industrialists; Hanna’s mother was a Weiss and Hanna, her siblings and many cousins all grew up in luxury, in Budapest, Hungary. The Szegedy-Maszaks, on the other hand were devout Catholic, middle-class people who, for generations, worked, primarily for the Hungarian state. Marianne focuses mostly on the 20th century and in particular the period running just prior to WWII through to the post-war period. The war is the event that crushed the Szegedy-Mazaks and displaced the Weiss/Kornfelds, costing them huge losses in money and property. Front and center in this story is the romance between Hanna Kornfeld and Aladar Szegedy-Maszak. Aladar, a Hungarian diplomat, working in Germany through much of the war, has to put his life – and their future – on hold for years. When the Germans finally take over things in Hungary – their reluctant ally - and everything comes crashing down, not only are a number of the Weiss/Kornfelds scooped up by the authorities and sent to various concentration camps, but Aladar, always a liberal in his politics, is also sent off to be held prisoner in a camp as well. It nearly kills him, but he survives and eventually makes it back to Budapest and a very different world. In some ways the Weiss/Kornfelds managed better than did the Szegedy-Maszak family, for the W/K family is able to parlay their great wealth and the greed of the Nazi, Kurt Becher, into a deal that saved them from extermination. After the war – after his and Hanna’s reunion and eventual marriage – Aladar seems to be putting his life back together when the new Hungarian government sends him to the United States to head their mission there. It is a short-lived success, however, for the Communists take over Hungary and Aladar becomes a man without a country. Marianne makes it plain that for most of her life she had no idea that her parents had had a great romance before the war. She was not able, because of all that they went through and the ways in which that experience affected them, to know the people they had once been. Aladar worked on his memoirs for years before his death, but he wrote in Hungarian – a language Marianne did not understand – and she had to hire a translator so that she could finally know her father. I found this story just a tad slow-moving in the pre-war period, but overall, it was a good, though disheartening. Aladar is crushed by everything that he has to go through (including the loss of a child) and I had the impression that he is but half a person in the last decades of his life. A solid, though, (for me) somewhat depressing book.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    What makes this book so remarkable is that it is a work of non-fiction. It is a true story. In Hungary thirty-two Jews obtain release to neutral countries, after striking a bargain with the Nazi party.In the late spring of 1944 thirty-two family members of a wealthy Jewish family gain freedom from persecution and escape to Portugal and Switzerland. After weeks of negotiations, Ferenc Chorin of the Manfred Weiss Company and Csepel Industries buys his family’s way out of Hungary by turning the family holdings over to the Germans. The Germans wanted the family’s businesses for several reasons. The holdings included a munitions factory and a large labor force. One other factor was that the Reich wanted it for financial reasons. The holdings and stocks represented a significant portion of the wealth of Hungary. Becher is an agent working for Himmler and negotiates the deal with Chorin. There was one draw back, one member from each family had to remain in Germany to prevent the families from slandering the Germans.I Kiss Your Hands Many Times is the story of Hanna’s family. Ferenc Chorin was her uncle. Although most of Hanna’s family had been Catholic for over twenty years the Hungarian government during World War II labeled them as Jewish. It was something that even years later when Hanna is in America she covers up. She even told her children not to tell their cousins. This book describes the history of Hungary and it’s politics before and after World War II and the effects on her family. The Hungarians were happy when Hitler attacked Russia. The Hungarians had no knowledge of the concentration camps and their activities. They felt that communism was their biggest fear.The love story of Hanna and Aldar is the foundation of the book. Aldar is employed in the Hungarian Foreign Ministry. This places him in a very difficult position during his negotiations with Germany due to his known anti-Nazi beliefs and his relations with Hanna. He met Hitler and ate lunch with him in his dining car. Aldar tells of his meeting with Hitler and the discussion that they had. Aldar later becomes a political prisoner in Dachau in November of 1944.Hanna and Aldar both survive the trials and the tribulations of the war and their love with stands the test of time.Overall I liked the book. It is very dense with facts and the politics take up a large portion of the story. They are an integral part to the understanding of the events that occur. I tend to gravitate toward the human interest part of the books I read. I am more interested in the thoughts and emotions of the characters than the politics. I would have liked a map of Hungary and Budapest in the front pages of the book. I am horrible at geography. I enjoyed the many photos that were included, but there were no captions under them identifying the people. This book is an incredible story of one family’s survival of the Hitler regime. I give it 3 out of 5 stars.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a straightforward memoir told within its historical context – WWII Hungary. The author reveals her unique family history of Jews and Christians - how they contributed to the economic and political building of Hungary, survived persecution of their Jewish family members, and tried to save Hungary from German and then Russian political domination. It is quite a history.The beginning chapters are a bit tedious. Names, family connections, and political figures fill the pages. The reader spends much time tracking and re-tracking them. Perhaps by offering a family tree and index readers could focus more on content as opposed to such details. A map would serve the reader well, too. The author’s writing style is not lyrical or poetic; it is a bit mechanical, however, not troublesome. Conversely, her father’s quality of writing, reproduced via his letters and quotes, are beautiful. Every writer offers his/her own technique, but I favor something more creative and original. I do not want to give a false impression and indicate her narrative is dull or wearisome. It is solely my aesthetic preference.As a biography of a family and their country, it is a phenomenal story. There is not a dull moment. Empires are built, collapse, and are reconstructed; love is found and goes astray; families are lost and re-established; all while a tragic history unfolds. It is both sad and humanizing. The family leads an incredible life of resilience, resourcefulness, and unnerving energy. We find a personal and heartbreaking history of Hungary’s demise during and after WWII. It is truly a fascinating story that needed to be shared and celebrated.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    I found this book to be a completely enjoyable read. I admit that the beginning was confusing with so many names and accomplishments The descriptions of her parents relationship as seen through the daughter's eyes was of particular interest to me. It compels even more to listen to my own mother's stories of her life and her life with my father. Unfortanately, I am like her that I can no longer ask my father his experiences. He died about twenty years ago. I believe the fact that she invites the reader's into her own life in such a way that engages me with my own family is a talent of great measure. And isn't that what true literature is about - making you think.I admit that the beginning of the book was confusing with such a vast family history and accomplishments. A family tree would be helpful. I felt a little frustrated with myself because of this. The photos at the beginning of each chapter gave me a feeling of connection with this family. I would have liked to see more family pictures - perhaps a free-standing section devoted to the photos with explanations. Awonderful start for a first novel!
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a memoir with a touching love story of the authors parents. There is so much detail involving family and the part that Hungary was forced to play in World Word 2 that the reader must go slowly and carefully to absorb it all. I felt it was well worth the effort as the author has covered the years from 1940 through the turn of the century with great care. It was a wonderful story of family relationships and the horrors they encountered in Europe,some as Jews, during the war and the difficulties in the aftermath. This book will really appeal to anyone who is interested in this period of history and/or enjoys the complicated workings of families.