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    One Hundred Percent Lunar Boy
    One Hundred Percent Lunar Boy
    One Hundred Percent Lunar Boy
    Audiobook12 hours

    One Hundred Percent Lunar Boy

    Written by Stephen Tunney

    Narrated by Andy Paris

    4/5

    ()

    About this audiobook

    Acclaimed musician and painter Stephen Tunney is also the author of Flan-a surprise hit that drew positive comparisons to William S. Burroughs' Naked Lunch and Miguel de Cervantes' Don Quixote. Sixteen-year-old Hieronymus Rexaphin has an amazing talent-he has the ability to see the fourth primary color, and therefore the unique future paths of time and matter. Because his eye color is illegal, he is forced to wear special goggles. But everything changes for him when he exposes his eyes to a young Earth girl.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherRecorded Books, Inc.
    Release dateDec 23, 2010
    ISBN9781449867508
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    Reviews for One Hundred Percent Lunar Boy

    4/5

    67 ratings53 reviews

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    • 4/5
      OK. I'll admit it. I'm a vampire nut!This story is unique in the way it portrays vampires and vampirism. Especially 'The Abstainers Handbook' a guide to help vampires deny their blood craving instincts and to try and pass among the general populace unnoticed. The Unnamed Predator Unit, a secretive branch of the police force tries to keep rogue vampire incidents from general public by aligning itself with a group of powerful vampires who help provide information and discipline among other vampires. Now meet the Radleys. Dad's a doctor, Mom's a homemaker with a talent for painting, dark and moody teenage brother Rowan and Clara a vegan who is just starting to become socially active. Vampires all, but Dad and Mom practice abstinence and have never discussed their vampire lineage with the kids. At a party Clara has to fight off the advances of an over amorous bully who corners her alone. A shockingly violent episode leaves quite a mess. What happened? How to explain what happened to the bully's family, friends and even the police!A call home brings her parents to try and control the situation but there are so many loose ends... An argument ensues over calling Uncle Will, a practicing vampire of some ill repute, who arrives to help, but also with family secrets and intentions to end the families abstinence and teach the kids their true natures.Equal parts vampire story and story of family dynamics the book moves back and forth between the two spheres never quite deciding which it will ultimately follow. I never really became immersed in the book to the degree I wanted. The characters never really conveyed the urgency that the story required to sustain my interest. There is little sex or excessive violence to worry about. I ultimately added it to my list of books for young adults.
    • 4/5
      A [fill in the genre] with vampires (or zombies or fallen angels or werewolves or all of the above) has become a norm in current literature. I keep trying to decide what that says about the times, but the best I can come up with is that we're just as obsessed with death and sex as the Victorians (and just as twisted about them, too). The Radleys is a suburban domestic drama with vampires. Think David Lynch's Blue Velvet meets John Updike with a little excursion through Shirley Jackson.Like all angst-ridden novels of suburbia the Radleys are bored with their choices, hiding themselves and their impulses, cheating their children of their real lives. Their marriage is stale, their lives are stale, their neighbors are stale - it's all just a little too bloodless.It is to Matt Haig's great credit that he has a wonderful sense of humor. He understands his setting and its cliches, but by populating it with vampires he both satirizes and cannibalizes it for everything its worth. Terse, thoughtful, witty, and dark - all told a fun read.
    • 5/5
      The Radleys are just a simple family trying to fit in to their suburban English community. Unfortunately, some of their ways are difficult to disguise--especially when Peter's unpredictable brother Will comes for a visit. There's The Abstainer's Handbook to guide them with helpful words such as "If the answer is blood, you are asking the wrong question." But the Handbook isn't enough when young Clara must fight off a rapist.Mom and Dad have a secret that they've not yet told the kids--they are all vampires! No wonder Clara becomes deathly ill when she tries a vegan diet--she must have meat to stay healthy!The vampire family struggling to fit into a normal English suburban community--too funny! The characters are well-developed, the satire is great, the vampire lore throughout (which was almost enough to make a believer of me! Michael Jackson! Jimi Hendrix? Hah!) All the characters grow and change through the week we spend with them, even the terrible next door neighbors!Although the book is ostensibly about marital problems, the children are not vague bystanders, but integral parts of the story. Nicely done, Mr. Haig!
    • 3/5
      The Radleys are a boring, suburban family. Peter's a doctor, Helen a housewife, and the two teenage kids have the usual troubles. Rowan is bullied at school for his weak nature and Clara is struggling with her decision to be vegan. The Radleys' boring life takes a drastic turn when Clara's response to an attacker reveals her true nature - she's a vampire. And she's not the only one. Peter and Helen have hidden the truth from their children in the hopes of offering them a normal life. In a panic, Peter calls on his brother, a vampire who makes no apologies for his lifestyle. Nothing will ever be the same for the Radleys. A satirical view of suburbia and an interesting approach to vampirism. Contains graphic descriptions, humor, and a light exploration of what it means to be true to one's self.
    • 3/5
      I picked this up at the library thinking it was probably a "spin-off" of To Kill a Mockingbird. Why not? Somebody should surely have written the story of Mr. Arthur's tormented life by now, right? Well, it ain't that. It's about a dysfunctional family, sure enough, though. I'm not sure why I sank my teeth into it at all after reading the cover blurbs....I thought I was finished with Wampyres long ago. But this turned out to be a decent junk food read that kept me turning pages even though the writing is nothing special and the story line is somewhat predictable once you get the set-up. Which is this: over the centuries a lot of well-known artists (as well as "ordinary people") have been vampires (who prefer the term "blood addicts" for some reason), some of whom have chosen to abstain from the practice of blood-sucking. Among these, we are meant to believe, were Bram Stoker himself, a good many rock musicians (nod to Ann Rice), and pretty much all English Romantic Poets except Wordsworth. Abstinence from blood-drinking is a path much much harder to follow than celibacy, for instance, as there are fairly extreme physical obstacles to be overcome. The Radleys are an old vampire family, whose current members include wild Will (definitely NOT an abstainer): his brother Peter, Peter's wife Helen, and their two misfit teenage children who have been kept ignorant of their true nature for 17 years. Naturally, no story would ensue if SOMETHING didn't happen to reveal the secret. The whole thing feels slightly satirical, and ends with a message---to thine own self be true, even if it means slugging back a pint of VB from time to time. Points for the vampire vocabulary, which includes "bram" (originally an acronym for Blood Resister's Animal Meat), VIB (Very Important Blood, of course) and UPU, the Unnamed Predator Unit of the Manchester police force, which knows all about the vampire culture, and strives to "limit its socially and morally destructive activities" by highly unconventional means. More points for references to the Booker Prize and Hay-on-Wye. Still, not something I'm recommending highly to my friends, at 21/2 stars.
    • 3/5
      Clara and Rowan live with sub-standard metabolisms, they have a constant rash, can't eat garlic, must wear sunscreen all the time while their parents have a very boring hum-drum life in an English town. What they don't know is that they're actually vampires. Well they don't know until Clara is attacked and kills a boy. Then things get complicated and everyone in the family has to face up to the reality of who they are and what makes them different.It's an interesting idea but I wasn't impressed, it wasn't bad, it just has an interesting idea and ran with it but didn't develop the characters in any great detail. A light read that kept me reading but didn't make me want to read more by that author or make me want more of the story.
    • 5/5
      The RadleysByMatt HaigWhere in the world do I start with this one? And before I start…this was not a YA book nor was it an intentionally humorous book but it was full of lots of sort of tongue in cheek humor. It was sort of a serious book about the vampires who live among us…or rather in the case of The Radley’s…they live in Bishopthorpe which is in England. Peter and Helen Radley appear to be quite normal…Peter is the village doctor and Helen belongs to a book club and keeps her house lovely and full of food (MEAT) and raises her son Rowan and her daughter Clara. And Helen paints apple trees with apples…over and over and over again.Rowan doesn’t get why he has to wear a 60 sun block and Clara doesn’t get why being a vegetarian is so appalling to her parents…until…hmm…I will get to that in a moment. The Radley’s…Peter and Helen are abstainers. They follow an Abstainers Handbook and have not tasted blood for years…but they do eat a lot of meat…deli meat.Clara is at a party with her friend Eve…she and Rowan are in high school and Clara is sort of nondescript…in other words…she is not a hottie. While at the party…Clara is sort of attacked by a classmate and …let’s just say that Clara will not be a vegetarian anymore.Thus begins the unraveling of The Radley’s and it is fascinating to watch. Clara and Rowan are both shocked to realize what their parents have been hiding from them for all of their lives…Then…due to Clara’s mishap with that classmate Uncle Will is called to town to help them solve their dilemma. He can “bloodmind” people into doing his will and this is what Helen needs him to do to the police to get Clara out of trouble. Uncle Will is an old fashioned sort of vampire with tons of bottles of blood in his camper and a penchant for neck biting both vampires and unbloods. (non vampires )Clara and Rowan sip some blood and become healthier and more beautiful and stronger. Clara is afraid that Rowan will not be able to stop himself from becoming the kind of vampire that Uncle Will is…this discussion occurs as they are walking to school and Rowan is contemplating asking out Eve, a classmate. He has a bottle of vampire blood in his backpack togive him courage. I love his response to his sister… which is…We are middleclass and we live in England…repression runs in our veins.However…it sort of doesn’t. There is actually a very cool surprise ending in this very clever book.I can’t compare it to anything. It is fresh and new and funny…not out loud funny sort of satirically funny. I thoroughly enjoyed it.
    • 5/5
      Don’t let the next sentences turn you off this book, for I thought it was brilliantly original and I loved it. It is being given the full crossover novel treatment with a young adult edition, however I firmly believe that it is an adult book (pictured) that teens will enjoy rather than the other way around. It also features vampires…Matt Haig is an expert at subverting normal family life in his novels. His tragicomedy The Last Family in England, (published as ‘The Labrador pact’ in the US), told the story of a family in freefall from the PoV of the family dog – who sees everything and understands more (and less) than you’d expect, and is in turns very funny and terribly sad.In The Radleys he takes another very different look at family life. Peter, a rather world-weary doctor, and his frustrated artist wife Helen, live in a Yorkshire town with their teenaged children, Clara and Rowan. To all outward purposes they are a totally normal dysfunctional family, but Peter and Helen have a big secret – they’re vampires, and what’s more, their children don’t know! However the Radleys are ‘abstainers’ – non-practising vampires; since their children were born, they’ve been models of restraint, relying on a diet full of red meat, but now they’re up against teenagers with hormones, and Clara is trying to become a Vegan…‘I’m worried about Clara,’ Helen says, handing Peter his lunchbox. ‘She’s only been vegan a week and she’s clearly getting ill. What if it triggers something?’He has hardly heard her. He is just staring downwards, contemplating the dark chaos inside his briefcase. ‘There’s so much flaming crap in here.’‘Peter, I’m worried about Clara.’Peter puts two pens in the bin. ‘I’m worried about her. I’m very worried about her. But it’s not like I’m allowed to offer a solution, is it?’Helen shakes her head. ‘Not this, Peter. Not now. This is serious. I just wish we could try and be adult about this. I want to know what you think we should do.’He sighs. ‘I think we should tell her the truth.’‘What?’He takes a deep breath of the stifling kitchen air. ‘I think it is the right time to tell the children.’However before they get round to it, something happens that will rock this family to the bottom of its foundations and everything changes.While there is plenty of dark comedy in this novel, there is also blood – gallons of it. At the heart of the story however is the family, with the parents in the grip of mid-life crises and the children coming of age, tricky at the best of times, and not helped by the arrival of Will, Peter’s vampire brother. Also running throughout the book are extracts from the non-practising vampire self-help manual ‘The Abstainer’s Handbook’, which is like a twelve-step programme for bloodsuckers. Blood is the drug, and this makes the vampire hunters the equivalent of the drug squad and junkies’ families.This book is a brilliant take on all the pressures upon modern suburban families. It’s dark, it’s funny, it’s wildly original; it was also easy to read and I loved it. If you’ve been suffering from vampire fatigue, this could be the antidote, and you’ll always wonder what your neighbours are up to! (9/10) I requested this book from the publisher – thank you to Canongate.
    • 3/5
      This one caught my eye because of the immediate connection I made - erroneously - to the Radley family of Harper Lee's Maycomb, Alabama. (I have no idea if Haig meant for it to reference that. I am a lazy reader and find too much research makes me feel like I'm back in Norman McMillan's graduate level lit courses.)

      If you care whether he meant it or not, I encourage you to Google your heart out.

      I digress.

      What starts out as a darkly comic social commentary slows when Haig switches gears from the tongue-in-cheek to the fang-in-neck. It would be more than fair, however, to say that he had my rapt attention once I let go of wanting the tone of the whole book to match the bang-up funny beginning.

      The Radleys and their two teenagers are abstaining vampires, although the kids don't know that until a pivotal event forces their genetics into the spotlight. Clara and Rowen only know that they are picked on a whole lot for their looks and their lethargy. Their parents -- Peter and Helen -- have adhered to every principle of The Abstainer's Handbook (the excerpts from which provide much of the humor herein) in raising their children and in living a "normal" life.

      For instance, they replaced their vampire fueled collection of music (you knew Jim Morrison was one, right?) with "... Phil Collins, Sting, and Vivaldi's Four Seasons, of which they played 'Spring' every time anyone came to dinner."


      Three stars always looks like a pan -- but it honestly is not. 3 stars means (in the land of Goodreads) that I liked a book, and I liked this one. I did.

    • 4/5
      The Radleys by Matt Haig was the 2011 ALA Alex winner. It features at first glance, a seemingly normal, middle class British family. The passion has pretty much fizzled from Peter and Helen's marriage. Their teenage children: Clara and Rowan are sullen, anemic, and targets of bullies.All of that changes, though, when Clara has to defend herself from being raped by a neighbor. She discovers the hard way that she is, in fact, a vampire. Her revelation also uncovers some family secrets her parents would have preferred to keep hidden.It took me a little while to settle into this rather short book. I found the writing dryer than The Dead Father's Club (2006). But the consequences of Clara's discovery were fascinating.
    • 3/5
      This was a pretty good book and a quick read. An interesting and different take on the whole vampire craze.
    • 5/5
      Part murder mystery, part analysis of a marriage, part coming-of-age, all vampire... this is a smart look at being a modern-day vampire and the notion of conforming versus freedom. Haig pulls it all together (okay, I admit, I lost some interest with the high action ending) and so this novel appeals to all ages, from teenagers to the middle-aged. Highly recommended.
    • 2/5
      The Radleys are a normal suburban family with the typical problems such families have in novels: the parents live meaningless and boring lives and feel trapped and stifled by their marriage but don't have the courage to do anything about it, while their teenagers are disaffected and self-absorbed. They're also vampires, which I thought would add excitement and interest. 174 pages in, and this hope was not met. Instead it was page after page of characters' boring internal workings as they wish for connection and excitement. I skimmed the rest of the book; a lot of stuff apparently happens, but none of it gripped me. And I was disappointed that each of the Radleys end up embracing their vampire sides and giving up on being abstainers.

      People who like literary fiction would probably like this book a lot more than I did. As fantasy stories go, I found it completely unsatisfying. I didn't care about the characters, I didn't like the minutia-obsessed writing style, and I didn't like the undercurrent of disdain for normal life that I felt running through it.
    • 2/5
      There are way too many vampire/zombie/living dead books available right now, but The Radleys presented itself to me as a fun book about a funny and warm family of reformed vampires, including a vegan. So I bit, pun intended. And I made it to about 150 pages before I gave up.For me, this book was neither funny nor warm-hearted. I've read some conflicting information - was this first published as a YA book and now there is an adult version? Or the opposite? The writing, especially in the beginning, seemed written for a young, or at least immature, audience, but too graphic for younger teens. That got a bit better as it went on. The characters seemed more like caricatures, too much like other, better known vampire characters. I still didn't like the characters after 150 pages and, more importantly, the plot was still boring me. Vegan daughter most definitely eats something not in her diet, family rallies around her, bad vampires, good vampires. And a mom who says things like “Now, me and your dad have been talking” and “Me and Peter want you to go.” Is there a reason for such poor grammar? Not as far as I read. She is married to a doctor (who doesn't care about his patients); you'd think she would be able to string together a proper sentence.I am sure there will be an audience for this book, but for those wanting a light and entertaining read rather than wanting yet another vampire book that takes itself too seriously, don't bother.Two stars instead of one because I didn't finish it and it may be wonderful in the end. Also because it was something totally different than I was expecting, which is due to hype rather than the book itself. I was given a copy of this book from the publisher.
    • 4/5
      The Radleys--father Peter, mother Helen, teenage son Rowan and daughter Clara--are an ordinary suburban family. They live a quiet life on a quiet street in a quiet town called Bishopthorpe. The family car is a nondescript SUV--not too flashy, not too dull. Peter's a doctor, Helen a housewife. Their house is decorated with muted colors, the artwork on their walls consists of soothing watercolors of pastoral scenes, and they have just the right books--that is to say, the books that their neighbors read--on the bookshelves.But all is not perfectly dull in the Radley household. Peter and Helen worry about Carla. She's recently become a vegetarian and, in addition to having her complexion transition from pale to stark white, has begun vomiting fairly regularly throughout the day. She became a vegetarian to try to convince animals to like her; for some reason, the neighborhood dogs bark and snarl when she comes near, and it distresses her terribly. And Rowan, reader of Byron and writer of bad poetry, worries his parents, too. He has no friends, never sleeps, and suffers from photodermatitis.You see, the Radleys, like many apparently normal suburban families, have a secret, one which Peter and Helen have kept even from their children. They are vampires. Nonpracticing vampires--abstainers, in the lingo--but vampires nonetheless. The Radleys' marriage is a mixed one; Peter is an hereditary vampire, Helen converted. The paleness, the photosensitivity, the sleeplessness: all symptoms of their abstinence.Recently, Peter has begun to chafe at all the rules. The children are growing up and he feels they should know what they are. Helen disagrees. Peter begins to think longingly of the pulsing vein in his attractive neighbor's neck.But then a real crisis comes. In a desperate attempt to seem normal and fit in with the other kids Clara has gone to a party. As she is walking home from the party a brutish boy accosts her and tries to have his way with her. In her struggle with him she bites his hand...she tastes his blood...and the jig is up.In their attempt to erase the completely understandable murder their daughter has committed the Radleys call Will, Peter's older brother and active practicer (according to The Abstainer's Handbook, an excerpt from which precedes each chapter, a practicer is a "practicing vampire; a blood addict who is unable and/or unwilling to give up his immoral habit"), to help them. Unfortunately, Will is a creature without a conscience, who lives for the kill and harbors an eternal desire for his brother's wife.Matt Haig's book The Dead Fathers Club, a retelling of Hamlet with a possibly mentally ill eleven year old boy cast in the lead role, was a tour de force. It was a disturbing story, told in an impressive in and spot-on child's voice, complete with misheard words and phrases and odd punctuation and capitalization. In this book Haig also captures a voice, although it's a more subtle, even mundane voice. He does an excellent job; this may be the least exciting vampire novel ever written, but this is not to say it's a boring book. He understands his characters, he understands the middle class to which they painfully aspire, and when all hell breaks loose toward the end of the book it's a glorious, beautifully written and very bloody mess. These are not the glittery vampires that mesmerized Bella in the Twilight books. They're not Anne Rice's romantic vampires. They're your next door neighbor. Your doctor. The mom who helps out by picking your kids up from soccer practice every other Saturday.Didn't you always think there was something up with those people?
    • 3/5
      A British vampire novel about vampires trying to raise their kids without letting on that they're vampires? Yes please

      This was a fresh new take on the genre, I thought.

      I was initially drawn to the book by the title, thinking it might be some sort of weird 'To Kill a Mockingbird' spin-off concerning Boo Radley and his family - who knows, maybe the title is an allusion to the weirdness of the Radley's in that novel.

      Overall a fun read - it's nothing that's going to change your life, but it's worth the time if you're into this sort of thing. (I am.)
    • 5/5
      Goodreads Description:Meet the Radleys Peter, Helen and their teenage children, Clara and Rowan, live in an English town. They are an everyday family, averagely dysfunctional, averagely content. But as their children have yet to find out, the Radleys have a devastating secret From one of Britain’s finest young novelists comes a razor-sharp unpicking of adulthood and family life. In this moving, thrilling and extraordinary portrait of one unusual family, The Radleys asks what we grow into when we grow up, and explores what we gain – and lose – when we deny our appetites.I'm never really sure what I'm going to find when I open a Matt Haig book, but one thing is for sure, I've never been disappointed. I truly enjoyed this book. It is so not your typical vampire book. The Radleys are a modern soap opera typical, slightly dysfunctional family, with one unique quality - they're vampires. Haig has created a witty, engaging story that keeps the reader engrossed from the first page. In a time when everyone is writing vampire stories, Haig has managed to join the game but with a unique twist. The familiar family dynamics between Helen and Peter Radley, and between the parents and the children, Clare and Rowan keep it from too vampy. It's a very good read and I, for one, would love to read more about the Radleys.One of the reviews I read on Amazon suggested that there are two versions of this book: one written for adults and one for teens. I couldn't find any word elsewhere of there being two different versions, but I did find talk about a movie based on the book. Hmm! I'm always skeptical of movies based on books, but I'm sure I'd add this one to my must see list.
    • 4/5
      The Radleys is unlike any vampire book I have ever read. It is a family saga and could be written about many English families, if those families happen to be vampires. It is the relationships within the family that truly matter - between husband and wife, parent and child, between two brothers. It is the discovery of a family secret that changes lives and redirects many paths. The Radleys is nothing like Twilight or True Blood or urban fantasy novels featuring vampires. There is much less action and more introspection. There are moral questions and a strong attempt to blend in to the unblood English society.Told in short chapters with shifting focus, The Radleys is a dark examination of life in English suburbia when keeping the family secret is held more closely than anything else. If you are a fan of all things English and vampires, I highly recommend The Radleys. I found it a delightfully dark change of pace from the other types of vampires stories that seem to be taking over books and movies these days.
    • 3/5
      "If blood is the answer, you are asking the wrong question."The Radleys are just another family in Bishopthorpe: Clara, the vegetarian teenager who doesn't understand why animals flee from her; Rowan, besotted with the girl a few streets over, whose dad really doesn't like the Radleys; and Ma and Pa Radley - stuck in standard stereotypical middle-class marital strife. Only problem: they're vampiric abstainers, trying to live a human life and avoiding blood consumption.I really wanted to enjoy The Radleys, Matt Haig's gentle satire of the vampire craze that has swept the literary world. Maybe my lack of prior offences with vampire books was the reason for my lukewarm reaction; often a parody is only funny if you are familiar with the object of the humour (is this why I didn't like Northanger Abbey?).Also - there was a whole lot of blood. This might be standard for vampire novels, and I'm no stranger to gory crime scenes from my steady thriller diet, but somehow this was far too graphic.Haig has a really clever idea here and I'm sure that those more familiar with the vampiric genre would derive great enjoyment from the subtle and unsubtle snarks that Haig drops all over the place, but it just wasn't for me.
    • 1/5
      In trying to dissect the inner lives of repressed vampires, there is absolutely no reflection on the losses of their victims. Cartoonish, but of the nasty sort.
    • 5/5
      As soon as it ended, I missed every single character immensely. I already know this one won’t let me go for a really long time.
    • 3/5
      When you read a mystery thriller book, you expect to be kept on the edge of your seat and to want to keep turning the pages long into the night. When I went into reading this book, that is not what happened for me. I read the description on the book and was excited about a new mystery book available to review, filled with family secrets. However, upon opening the book and reading through it, I was quite disappointed to see that it was a vampire-like story. Definitely not what I usually read. Oh, don't get me wrong. I will, from time to time, read a book outside my favorite genres because every author deserves a chance. And, so, I delved into this book with hopes that it wouldn't be "just another vampire story" that I so don't like to read. To my surprise, while definitely NOT my absolutely all time favorite book, it was an alright book. I wouldn't keep it on my bookshelf though. I found that the plot, was indeed, well written and interesting. The characters really fit the roles that they played in this story. The complexity of the vampire-likeness of the novel, was so much more than in past vampire-y novels that I have read. The author truly has a talent for writing this style of book. Would I recommend this book to everyone? No. Would I recommend this book to those who love vampire novels and fantasies? Most definitely. Would I read it again? No, simply because this is not my usual taste in books. Does it deserve a fair rating? Of course. The author deserves high kudos for talent and the book deserves 3 stars for being well written.
    • 5/5
       I loved this book. That perfect combination of fast paced, well plotted easy reading, but with deep themes and insights on the human condition. Repression and secrets and how we control our urges and how denying our urges stops us being who we truly are. And how maybe, somewhere in the middle, if we're lucky, there's a balancing act that will get us through.
    • 4/5
      Finally, a modern day vampire tale I can endorse. The Radleys are a family of abstainers. They are vampires, but they try to maintain a normal life by abstaining from human blood. That is until circumstances force them into the light, and they must deal with their supernatural thirst and desire. A page-turner, that also satisfies as a smart tale of family togetherness.
    • 4/5
      Now this is a vampire story I do like. Written in our everyday world, good people who try to live alongside the rest of the world. It certainly does all go wrong but it is written in such a way that the reader can identify with some elements like fitting in, after all we all do our best to fit in as human beings. Many of us suffer with allergies, okay maybe not quite so specific and with a strong need to hide said allergies! Uncle Will is the typical rogue needed to liven up this law abiding family and bring out their secrets. Funny, witty, a good read.
    • 3/5
      Yes, it's true. It IS another vampire book. But with some interesting new ideas about "abstaining" vampires (they don't drink blood anymore--just eat a whole lot of rare meat) and mixing in with society that keep it fun and fresh and the pages flying by. It's a British novel, so there are some interesting quirks there, as well. The basic premise is that two abstaining vampires--one a born vampire, one converted--have become your basic suburban couple with two teenagers--two vampire teenagers who have no idea they are vampires. Their pale skin and sunlight issues have been variously explained away to them. Until one night at a party when a boy tries to attack Clara, and she ends up pretty much eating him. Then the blood really hits the fan and 17 years of secrets start coming out. I found it quite entertaining, with bits of mystery, love story, and action/horror. But NC17 I'd say--not for Twilight teeny-boppers.
    • 3/5
      "I can control myself. Look, for God's sake. Look at everyone. Everyone represses everything. Do you think any of these "normal" human beings really do exactly what they want to do all the time? 'Course not. It's just the same. We're middle-class and we're British. Repression is in our veins." I... don't actually remember a lot about this book. Which probably says it all, to be honest, because normally I'm pretty good as far as bookish memory goes. I started reading it on holiday, finished it back home, and was decidedly disappointed by the whole shebang. Haig seems to be excellent at coming up with quirky book ideas, but sadly this one just doesn't live up to expectations. It's about a family - the titular Radleys - living in Bishopthorpe, the very picture of middle-class suburban life. Father Peter is a doctor, mother Helen hosts dinner parties for the neighbours, siblings Rowan and Clara muddle along at school... life is very, very normal. Except it's not. Because what Rowan and Clara DON'T know is that they're vampires. Abstainers, in fact. They've never thought anything of their taste for meat, getting headaches all the time and having to slather on Factor 50 suncream every day. Then one night, at a party, Clara goes into a kind of blood frenzy and kills a boy. It's time for Helen and Peter to tell them the truth - and, horror of horrors - call in Peter's bloodthirsty non-abstaining brother Will to help with the fallout... Sounds great, doesn't it? And for a while, it was. Probably up until the moment Will helped throw the police off the scent regarding the dead boy. From that point onwards, I wanted the focus to be on the teenagers coping with their new identity and learning about vampire lore. I wanted Peter and Helen to readjust to their children's new-found knowledge, and for the tension between them and Will regarding their blood drinking habits (or lack of) to feed into the way they settled back into family life. Instead, what happened was that the kids seemed to just accept their vampdom and be very enthusiastic about the whole thing, Will's extracurricular activities became a focus, then the whole novel went to hell in a handbasket with a confusing love triangle, a sudden complete 180-degree turnaround for one of the characters, a bit of rather cliched romance, some rather confused mid-air fighting (no, really) and a truly horrible climax. There WERE some really clever elements to Haig's vampiric world. The Sheridan Society, for example, are a group of elite vampires... points for the literary in-joke, right there. Famous vampires have included everyone from Jimi Hendrix (naturally) to Byron (who faked his death and is now DJing in Ibiza with Thomas De Quincey as 'Don Juan and DJ Opium'). The text is littered with quotes from The Abstainer's Handbook, and there is a handy Abstainer's Glossary at the back of the book. The strangeness of life as a vampire is beautifully evoked at times, like this revelation about the way nature falls silent around them, which I found strangely moving: "Rowan nods, knowing he could never tell her he has only ever heard birdsong online, or that he and Clara once spent a good hour watching video footage of chirping sedge warblers and chaffinches, nearly in tears."But... I'm sorry, but the jumble that is the rest of the novel really ruined the whole experience for me. I wanted so much to love it, but it turned out to be what the delightful descriptive word 'meh' was made for. I kept reading, don't get me wrong - the chapters are short and easy to plough through - but I was hugely disappointed. I think the problem is that Haig just doesn't seem to know what he wants the book to BE. Is it a comedic novel, as the hype implies? Is it a horror story? Is it a family drama? Or a romance? Some novels could fit all of these things in and it would work fine, but in this case it just distorts the plot and characters, so that every time I thought I'd got a handle on it, it would pull away in another direction. Bottom line? I just didn't gel with this one. It was confusing and forgettable and generally not what the ringing endorsements on the cover suggested it would be, and I had hoped for so much more. I have humungously high hopes for The Humans, however, so... fingers crossed the next review'll be a rave.
    • 4/5
      The Radleys could be your average family: mother, father, brother, and sister. They have some unusual problems, but nothing they think they aren't handling just fine. Except for just one not-so-minor thing -- the Radleys are vampires. With the current literary focus on vampire stories, I wasn't sure I would like this one. I'm no fan of the Twilight series or books similar to those. In fact, my book snobbery comes out in discussions about the current trend in vamp-lit because what I've read of it could have been written with crayons by a third grader. Fortunately Matt Haig is no third grader. He has written a story I found convincing about a family who happen to be vampires but have to deal with situations lots of living people have. I mean, what other literary vampire has to put up with bullying on a pretty intense scale? I'd recommend The Radleys to anyone who likes stories that are a little offbeat but still have heart.
    • 5/5
      This book is excellent on different levels. I liked the morals and dilemmas faced, the great characterisation, and the fact that did you didn’t know quite where the story was going. By that, I mean, you knew where it should go, but not quite how it would get there without the sharp turns and twists seen in modern thrillers. A very different read, and refreshingly well written without being contrived.
    • 4/5
      I won this book from the Goodreads First Reads program.The Radleys are a normal, boring upper middle class British family, with one tiny difference: they are vampires. When Helen and Peter Radley get married and find out Helen is pregnant, they decide that they are going to leave their wild and crazy blood-filled life behind and follow the rules from The Abstainer's Handbook: integrate, integrate, integrate! If you get the urge to drink blood, work out! Or do the dishes, or some other mundane chore. Their children, Clara and Rowan, have no idea that they are vampires, they just think they are always tired and have chronic headaches (and in Rowan's case a terrible skin condition) because they have a vitamin deficiency. That is, until Clara is being physically attacked by a bully from her school, and she fights back by chomping into him! Their parents are forced to tell them the truth and call Will, Peter's very active blood-drinking vampire brother, to help them out. That's when their carefully constructed plans all come apart at the seams. From Goodreads: "One night, Clara finds herself driven to commit a shocking—and disturbingly satisfying—act of violence, and her parents are forced to explain their history of shadows and lies. A police investigation is launched that uncovers a richness of vampire history heretofore unknown to the general public. And when the malevolent and alluring Uncle Will, a practicing vampire, arrives to throw the police off Clara’s trail, he winds up throwing the whole house into temptation and turmoil and unleashing a host of dark secrets that threaten the Radleys’ marriage."I wasn't sure what to expect from the book because it is listed, per the author, as a "domestic drama." And in essence, that's what it is. The fact that they are vampires is almost secondary to the fact that they are doing everything in their power to be good, constructive members of society. Peter is a doctor, and Helen belongs to the weekly book club. But vampires they are, and no matter how much they try to hide it, it doesn't change the facts. I thought Matt Haig did an excellent job blending these two things. This isn't your average vampire book by any means, but in this case, it definitely works. As you watch their carefully constructed world fall apart piece by piece, you are drawn into the story. There is a nice little back story going on about how Helen was converted into vampirism, and this too works nicely to flesh out the story. The characters definitely grow and change throughout the story, and I was very happy with the ending! In summary, this is a very good book, and I definitely recommend it for vampire book lovers who are looking for something a little bit different to sink their teeth into :D