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    The Household Guide To Dying
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    The Household Guide To Dying
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    The Household Guide To Dying
    Audiobook (abridged)4 hours

    The Household Guide To Dying

    Written by Debra Adelaide

    Narrated by Eleanor David

    4.5/5

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    Unavailable in your country

    About this audiobook

    A brilliantly moving and darkly comic novel, which charts the attempts of dying heroine Delia – a modern day Mrs Beeton – to prepare her family for the future and lay to rest a ghost from her past

    Inspired by her heroine, Isabella Beeton, Delia has made a living writing a series of hugely successful modern household guides, as well as an acerbic domestic advice column. As the book opens, she is not yet forty, but has only a short time to live.

    She is preoccupied with how to prepare herself and her family for death, from writing exhaustive lists to teaching her young daughters how to make a perfect cup of tea. What she needs, more than anything, is a manual – exactly the kind she is the expert at writing. Realising this could be her greatest achievement (for who could be better equipped to write The Household Guide to Dying?) she sets to work. But, in the writing, Delia is forced to confront the ghosts of her past, and the events of fourteen years previously. There is a journey she needs to make, back to the landscape of her past, and one last vital thing she needs to do.

    Hugely original, life affirming and humorous, The Household Guide to Dying illuminates love, loss, family and the place we call home.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherHarperCollins
    Release dateJun 16, 2008
    ISBN9780007293131
    Unavailable
    The Household Guide To Dying
    Author

    Debra Adelaide

    Debra Adelaide is the author of two novels which were published in Australia and four themed collections of fiction and memoirs. She has worked as a researcher, editor and book reviewer, and has a PhD from the University of Sydney. She is now a senior lecturer in creative writing at the University of Technology, Sydney. She has three children and several chickens.

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    Reviews for The Household Guide To Dying

    4.5/5

    23 ratings23 reviews

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    • 4/5
      I was quite amused when I saw the American cover for The Household Guide to Dying on the Internet. Debra Adelaide’s publishers, apparently out of fear that the title might put readers off, have added the cheery caption ‘A novel about life’ to counteract the macabre subject matter. The novel does, indeed, begin softly enough, as our narrator’s particular but gentle voice guides us through a visit to the family chickens. Adelaide, however, makes no attempt to hide the awful truth, which strikes without warning or euphemism, just as it did for Delia Bennet. While the writing may flow easily from page to page, with engaging personality and enjoyable wit, there are a number of quite confronting passages to remind us that death is by no means an easy subject. Like Delia, readers will have to accept that.It is fortunate, then, that their guide to the ups and downs of dying is perfect for the task. Our picture of Delia does not form immediately, but Adelaide’s characterisation rings true throughout, creating a slightly obsessive, wry but still tender and very human narrator. As the quintessential Australian superwoman, she will have mothers across the country laughing and nodding in unison at her anecdotes of household chaos. These priceless passages are interspersed through chapters of reflection and storytelling, as three different time periods in Delia’s life run simultaneously, each contributing to the others and helping to balance life and death, humour and heartbreak. Then there are Delia’s written admonishments of hapless letter-writers, and the no-nonsense passages from her Household Guides, indicative perhaps of her meticulous personality, or perhaps of the professional façade she creates.With its many narrative techniques, its control, its dignity and authenticity, Adelaide’s writing is a worthy addition to modern Australian literature. My sole criticism is for the lack of quotation marks, which hovers initially on the verge of pretentiousness, but is easily accommodated once the novel has gained some momentum. It is a thoroughly well-constructed look at a difficult subject, and one which never reduces itself to excessive or contrived sentimentality. Not too sickly, not too bleak – the balance, I think, is perfect.
    • 3/5
      I was particularly intrigued by the novelty of this premise and its juxtapositions – a woman dying of cancer who has written a whole series of ‘household guides’ on the various domestic arts decides to write as her swan song a book on how to handle death and dying. We read about the events of three different times of her life, and the domestic advice she offers the readers of her column, as she approaches the end of her life. A worthwhile but not always enjoyable read - poignant and heart-wrenching, challenging and confronting in turn, as is perhaps inevitable given the subject matter.
    • 5/5
      This is a story about Delia a woman who is dying. She has had a double mastectomy, all the trearment she can handle and now is the time that she must make herself ready for her death. She is a writer of household guides Laundry, gardening the Kitchen etc and she has a brainwave that she will write a guide to "Dying", to help others!She takes us back to a time 22 years before all this happens, to another life she lived but which was also connected to todays life, (you will see when you read the book, as I hope you will!).She got pregnant by a musician when young and went off to find him. She didn't, but made a life for herself in a small town called Amethyst in Australia, (the story is set in Australia, but could be anywhere), She bought a caravan and lived there bringing up her beautiful son Sonny for 8 years until a terrible accident killed Sonny and left her bereft. Sonny's heart was transplanted into a little girl who needed it and we find Delia going back to Amethyst to try and find the young girl before she dies. The book jumps (quite gently) back and forth from then to now.She is writing her book, making lists and trying to smoothe her families passage through her death. At times she comes across as very controling and sometimes a bit odd, like when she decides she loves her family so much she wants to leave a part of her behind and makes some blood sausage usung her own blood!! (yes I did say her own blood!!) but she later throws them away!The book is quite gentle in the way it comes across, she has the time to do the things she wants for her family (filling the freezer with home cooking, planning her daughters wedding, choosing a possible partner for her husband Archie!)but realises at the end that really none of it matters, as she puts it "Death is a poetic moment".I really enjoyed this book after s slow start. I was left thinking that she had been so lucky to have the time to wind down and say goodbye. I would recommend this book wholeheartedly.
    • 4/5
      wonderful concept, to proudly write about the satisfaction felt in running a household - specially loved reading about washing, and encouraged me to let loose my domestic goddess. A warm, interesting read with lots of threads and a curious time line (caravan life, elvis, washing sheets, letters to the domestic editor, chooks, eternity) but there were a few dull bits ... good to v good.
    • 4/5
      This was definitely an original book - written from the largely unsentimental point of view of a woman about to die from cancer. The author makes a lot of interesting points about what goes through your head when you're about to die (and in the months preceding). However, the narrative hits a couple of low points (when the protagonist decides to bake her own blood into sausages for her family) and a fantastical subplot about a heart transplant.
    • 5/5
      This book was an excellent portrayal of one woman's attempt to deal with her oncoming death by mapping it out for other women. As Delia wrestles with the realities of a terminal cancer diagnosis, she tries desperately to keep her family life as normal as possible. When she suddenly leaves her family to drive halfway across the country in search of her past, Delia finds more and less than she had hoped. This poignant look at Delia's last months was unexpectedly funny in parts- I found myself laughing in spite of myself at certain points. Delia's relationship with her husband and children rang true, her love for them tempered by occasional annoyance and understandable frustration as she grows weaker. When Delia brought home her coffin for her family to decorate, it was both shocking and completely perfect. Though I wasn't certain about the way some of the plotlines came together (can't say more without spoilers), the actual ending of the book more than made up for any earlier faults. Delia's death was handled with amazing sensitivity and actually brought tears to my eyes. Highly recommended.
    • 5/5
      Although the title of this book sounds like it might be a hard go, the subtitle is “a novel about life” and that is the overwhelming message of this book. All of us will die at some time but how we live before then makes all the difference.Delia is dying of cancer. She had a double radical mastectomy two years ago but the cancer returned and metastasized and chemotherapy is just postponing the inevitable. Delia is married to Archie and they have two daughters, Estelle and Daisy. The girls are old enough to know their mother is dying but young enough to not be sure what that means. Delia stayed home after the girls were born and looked after them and the house. She is a consummate house cleaner and cook and laundress and makes everything she does look easy. She is so good that she does an advice column for a magazine. She has also written a series of books called Household Guides in which she imparts her advice for laundry, the kitchen and other topics. Now that she is dying she is writing The Household Guide to Dying. As she writes it she realizes she has some unfinished business to take care of and it entails a long journey to the northern area of Australia. The book is structured so that portions of her trip are interspersed with her life at home getting ready to die. There are also samples of her advice column sprinkled here and there so some people might find the book disjointed. I enjoyed the various levels which allowed us to get to know Delia over time, much as we might if we met her in person.I won’t say that this book isn’t sad; there were parts when tears came to my eyes but there were also parts where I snorted with laughter. I thought frequently of two good friends who died recently of cancer leaving behind children and a husband. Like Delia, they faced death with grace and courage and lived life to the fullest while they could.I think this book would be a wonderful read for a book club. Lots of meaty discussions could be had about the revelations and the subject.
    • 4/5
      On the face of it, Delia's got it all good marriage, two great kids, dream job writing witty, practical house and garden books. But when she is diagnosed with terminal cancer, she is forced to view her life in an entirely new light. There are things she must do, there are wrongs to be put right, and there are mysteries from the past that demand resolution. But there is just so little time. Summoning all her strength, she returns to the tiny country town where she fled pregnant and unmarried 14 years before and comes to terms with a loss no mother should ever have to endure. She finishes writing her ultimate how-to book. And she tries, as best she can, to prepare herself and her family for the inevitable. Summary National Library of AustraliaTHE HOUSEHOLD GUIDE TO DYING takes a highly unpopular subject--#death--and shows how a highly controlling person--#Delia--might approach it. Examples: Delia buys a coffin--not a casket--and ha it delivered to the house BEFORE she dies for her daughters and husband to decorate; she spends days cooking to stock the freezer with family favourite dishes; definitely not NIcholas Sparks or Mitch Albom here.Despite a slow start, THE HOUSEHOLD GUIDE TO DYING is a moving, sometimes humorous, demystifying dramatization of an event in which each one of us will eventually participate.7.5 out of 10 Recommended to fans of Australian fiction and to readers who look for quality content in their fiction.
    • 5/5
      A fictional account of a young mother's journey towards her early death from breast cancer. Far funnier and compassionate than it sounds as she tries to come to terms with both her lost of a child and the progress of her disease.It might have read better if the last chapter - about her death- was written from the viewpoint of her family not hers but a surprisingly entertaining read.
    • 5/5
      Delia is an advice columnist who is known for her sarcastic and blunt advice and also writes how-to books. She is married to Archie, and they have two young daughters. Everything would be wonderful except Delia was diagnosed with bilateral breast cancer, has had a double mastectomy, gone through radiation and chemo, and now the cancer has metastasized to other parts of her body and there is no hope for a recovery. She decides to write her last how-to book on dying: picking out the casket, planning a funeral, etc. But Delia also decides to take a trip back to the town of Amethyst where she lived as a teen-age, unwed mother and come to terms with the events that happened there 14 years ago. The book is heart-rending but also uplifting and was much, much more than I thought it was going to be. Kudos to the author.
    • 4/5
      What's an advice columnist to do when she discovers she is dying? Write a book providing advice about dying, of course.And that's what Delia does, in this little novel that's a poignant mix of clever columns and stories from Delia's difficult past along with stories about her life as a dying woman.
    • 5/5
      rabck from Mysscyn; if you skip the section about the blood sausage, which was just gross, this is an excellent book. Delia is the author of the Household Guide to xxxx series, and a columnist. She pitches the idea of The Household Guide to Dying to her publicist, as the last book she'll write as she's dying of terminal cancer. The book is intended for "what to do pre-death" and this book follows her journey in writing it - including interwoven chapters of her life as a young single mother of Sonny, who is tragically killed at age 8 & you can tell that until now, she never reconciled that loss. It's also the story of her life, relationships and family. Very well written, quite humorous at times and definitely NOT morbid at all.
    • 5/5
      A deeply personal and moving novel. A beautifully written book that I did not want to end.
    • 4/5
      great book, had to finish it in one sitting, couldnt put it down. Made me go away and think about life death etc after I finished it. Awesome.
    • 4/5
      quirky, humorous and heartbreaking in equal measure, interwoven household hints and mystery story, recommended
    • 4/5
      A woman who writes household guides is dying, so writes a guide to that too. There are two major strands to this story - the main character's past and present. They come together well. The character development is strong and the emotional depth of the characters is well written. I really enjoyed this book for its plot, character and structure. Warning - have a hanky close by, particularly in the second half.(Read July 2008)
    • 5/5
      Debra Adelaide, an Australian, is a new author to me, but one that I will continue following. In this book, Delia is dying and trying to figure out how to do that, what is important, and facing old fears. But this book is not your cookie cutter dying book. It took me several weeks to read this book, not because it is a difficult read, but I needed time to digest each chapter, to think about what was going on before proceeding. Everyone dies, no one likes to talk about it, but Delia has given me new insights and the writing is funny, serious, and sarcastic and kept me wanting more. More information and I might just be giving you spoilers, so please just pick this one up and read. I highly recommend this book and have added it to my permanent collection.
    • 3/5
      All in all, it was worth the read. It was a bit of a slow slog. Because my dad died at home of cancer just a few years ago, at a relatively young age - I did not find Delia's way of dealing with death to be as realistic as I've experienced. As for Delia being morbid - try deaing with the palliative care group that cared for my dad - who asked my dad straight out on his first meeting with him - what do you want to happen to your body after you are dead? Or - you realize your body may have to remain in the home for some hours becase we only offer assistance between 7 am to 7 pm..
    • 4/5
      I loved this book. I savored the parts when she described breathing in the smell of her babies, kissing their feet while they slept in their beds. Even chickens and their eggs were interesting. Who would have thought that a guide to dying could be so warm, witty, sweet and sad. This book drew me back and I finished it on a beautiful day when I should have been outside. I won it as an uncorrected proof and glad it's mine so I could turn down pages to remember where a favorite was. This would be great for a book club, I know I want to share it with my friends.
    • 3/5
      This book was an excellent portrayal of one woman's attempt to deal with her oncoming death by mapping it out for other women. As Delia wrestles with the realities of a terminal cancer diagnosis, she tries desperately to keep her family life as normal as possible. When she suddenly leaves her family to drive halfway across the country in search of her past, Delia finds more and less than she had hoped. This was not a book that I really connected with. A bit depressing.
    • 5/5
      Fictional but feels very real - how a woman deals with her impending death - mostly philosophically but also searches for people she needs to contact before they can't find her - so there's a little mystery to keep one intrigued. Likeable humorous character, interesting sections on writing, probably mostly for women as it covers women's choices in life and mostly shows a woman's emotional life. Blokes would probably deal with impending death differently.
    • 4/5
      Delia is a witty and sardonic household advice columnist who is dying of cancer. She convinces her editor to allow her to write a book called "The Household Guide to Dying". We see her life in flashbacks along with present day, and it occasionally gets a little confusing. But this is a heartfelt, moving, very well-written book about a woman who has overcome tragedy in her past, and is now ready to approach her own death with the strength, humor and class that has been the hallmark of her life. A beautifully written ending, too.
    • 4/5
      Delia is a columnist who offers advice on domestic dilemmas and when facing her own mortality sets out to write a guide to dying. She cancels her chemotherapy, and for a short time leaves her husband and two daughters returning to a place she lived as a young woman to reconcile her past. The narrative moves between the past and present and with each chapter she continues to correspond with her readers and she sees through their domestic requests and offers relationship advice.A most enjoyable read, beautifully written and uplifting despite its dark theme.