Tears of the Silenced: An Amish True Crime Memoir of Childhood Sexual Abuse, Brutal Betrayal, and Ultimate Survival
Written by Misty Griffin
Narrated by Cassandra Campbell
4.5/5
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About this audiobook
Amish sexual abuse: When Misty reached her teens, her parents feared she and her sister would escape and took them to an Amish community where they were adopted and became baptized members. Misty was devastated to once again find herself in a world of fear, animal cruelty and sexual abuse. Going to the police was severely frowned upon. A few years later, Misty was sexually assaulted by the bishop. As Misty recalls, "Amish sexual abusers are only shunned by the church for six weeks, a punishment that never seems to work. After I was assaulted by the bishop I knew I had to get help and one freezing morning in early March I made a dash for a tiny police station in rural Minnesota. After reporting the bishop I left the Amish and found myself plummeted into the strange modern world with only a second-grade education and no ID or social security card. To all abuse survivors out there, please be encouraged, the cycle of abuse can be broken. Today, I am a nursing student working towards my master's degree and a child abuse awareness activist. This is my story."
Contains mature themes.
Misty Griffin
In spring of 2005 Misty left the Amish, she left with nothing but the clothes on her back, a few other belongings and with barely a third-grade education. For years Misty suffered severe PTSD which was caused by the horrifying abuse she suffered as a child, and later when being effectively “given away” to the Amish and put in the hands of the very abusive Amish bishop. Today, thirteen years later Misty is a nursing student, a Child Sexual Abuse activist, wife and successful author of several books, including this one. For more on Misty and her current books, please go to www.tearsofthesilenced.com
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Reviews for Tears of the Silenced
135 ratings16 reviews
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Such courage and strength. Thank you for sharing your story
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I was very glad when Misty stood up and left the Amish. I have great respect for her courage. As well, her helping others in similar situations is very admirable. I knew the Amish youth had trouble with substance abuse and some rowdy behavior but never had an inkling that there was so much rampant sexual abuse of kids. This story really opened my eyes to something I have already experienced on a personal level…people are people no matter what.
I am 100% against kids being isolated and “home schooled” unless or until a system of “outside” entities are organized enough to allow these children to be observed, tested, and methods endorsed for making sure these same children are thriving. I doubt there are many mothers able to keep a house running who are also qualified to teach their large families anything beyond the basics, if that. I’m not saying I agree with the all the things public education is forcing on children these days, a balance must be struck. Fortunately where I live, in California, there are Charter schools with different curriculum requirements but they are few and have long student waiting lists.
I applaud Misty for her courage. Bravo!
Thanks for putting your story out there. You have great courage.
Marylin
I am also (retired ER) RN and have a similar background coming from a “Jesus” Group in the late 70’s. My poor children. Another sad story. But they prosper now. Thankfully?? - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I first heard of Misty’s tragic story on my favorite true crime podcast, Morbid, in which Ash and Alaina gave a bit of a crash course of it. Her story stuck out to me and is one I’ll never forget. While it is such a unique experience, I cannot relate to many parts of it; however, I am a survivor of childhood physical and sexual abuse and her last thoughts in this memoir were very emotional for me. Her statement about acting on any suspicion is so valid and I also beg you to do so, as she asks of you as a survivor herself. I often wonder how different my life would be if I would have had that one person who suspected actually act on it and report it instead of turning a blind eye for the sake of preserving our “perfect family” image. But, as Misty states herself, my own story has brought me to what I do now and I couldn’t be more grateful. I will be graduating next December with my master’s in clinical mental health counseling. I pursued this field due to my experience with childhood abuse, along with many other traumatic experiences. Also like Misty, I hope to write my own memoir one day. These stories need to be told and awareness needs to be spread. As for the aspect of her story regarding much of her trauma occurring while living in the Amish community—this reigned me in because of some close ties I have with members of an order of the Amish only a couple of hours from where I live. My father and a friend of his own and run a sawmill for that Amish community I am talking about and, while they do appear and behave as simple, gentle people, Misty’s story and bringing of awareness has now led me to be more keenly aware of any gut feelings I may have when I am up at the sawmill and spending time with this Amish community. Last, I want to say that I read this memoir for a project of mine within my grad school program Crisis Interventions course in which we had to locate a memoir with a backstory of a specific crisis (such as sexual abuse) and write a 10+ page analysis of the aspects of the crisis. Sadly, for Misty, her crisis is what we consider developmental, or more widely known as complex trauma. It makes for great material to use in my project, but I’m writing this review (which, I never write reviews) because I wanted to comment on the fact that Misty’s story means so much more and is useful for so much more than a school paper. I hope that the work I do can reflect at least a fragment of the need for awareness of these heinous crimes covered up within strictly organized religious communities. Thank you, Misty, for being so outright vulnerable and sharing your story with us. You are the definition of a survivor, a hero, a fighter. Keep on keeping on.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Absolutely incredible real story. Hopefully the authorities sit up, take notice and do what they are paid to do; that is protecting people from crime!!!
Anyway I couldn’t put Misty’s story down.
I did notice some glitches in the audio book where some chapters were cut off abruptly missing a little bit off the end. I just read those bits on the written version so as not to miss out on a single word. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Eye-opening and inspiring. Awesome read and highly recommended. Loved it
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5One of the things I always wondered about the Amish in their zeal to keep separate is how they avoid inter-marriage and births. What I mean is, since they are such a closed community that somewhere along the line they will end up marrying a close cousin. It baffled me until I finished this book.
I think the Amish like some of the Mormons might have started out with good intentions in their eagerness to “please God,”,But that was UNTIL the heady level of power the MEN attained and used to rule with an iron fist, that made them think they could do no wrong. Where does a 65 or 70 year-old-man get off marrying a 12 or 13 year old girl and tell everyone that it is God’s will. That is the biggest lie , since THE BIG LIE.
I am also baffled by the fact that somewhere someone (like a mother) didn’t got bat sh*t crazy and kill their husband or bishop who was molesting their children. I am amazed and confused how people who are so religious and read the bible from end to end can continue to do what they do to children.
And is EVERY Woman so controlled and beat down by her husband and church that they literally look the other way while their children, both girls and boys are molested. If you they go to such lengths to protect them from the “evil” of a light bulb or cell phone, then why not go a little further and STOP their husband’s from hurting their kids. If they let it happen then they too are guilty.
It tells me that these men are already sick and they do it because they can and they like it. The so-called Bishops and elders are also complicit and not worthy of the title they have.
In reading this book, I was disgusted when the author indicated that these so called “good men of faith” also practiced bestiality, and THAT most certainly IS frowned upon in their bible. I guess it is like the insurrection of January 6th, they just don’t see what we all saw.
It’s unfortunate that these things happen anywhere, but it is horrible when it is hidden and tolerated behind the guise of clergy. I don’t think I will ever visit the Pennsylvania Dutch again. - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5So sorry that life can be so. Hard for some
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I'm so sorry you went thru that , I had no idea that went on there.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This was a very sad read. She went through a lot of abuse as a child by people who obviously weren't in the right state of mind to be looking after a child. I found it odd how Brian wanted to start becoming Amish so randomly to. This book was written well, although there were a few grammatical errors.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Powerful and also heartbreaking memoirs of a courageous lady..
Believe ❤ - Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5I am very sorry for what this little girl went through, but this is too horrible for me to continue.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5At moments, this was a tough book to read.You feel dirty at times, witnessing the abuse these two girls, their grandmother and their aunt suffered through the book. It almost felt wrong to read it.But there is a message there.Moving forward is possible.You won't feel it at that moment, in that space in time, but it is there. Just like it was for Misty. She took that power into her own hands.She is a voice for all of those silenced victims in the Amish community.As a worldly person, I am left wondering how we as a people can allow this to continue. If you read this book, you will be affected. You will probably ask how people can turn a blind eye based on religion.I did, at least.I read my Bible every single day, and the teachings I learn from God within that book say nothing about abuse and being a sexual predator.At least there is a happy ending to the story.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Tears of The Silenced: An Amish True Crime Memoir of Childhood Sexual Abuse, Brutal Betrayal, and the Ultimate Survival by Misty Griffin 2019 Mango Publishing 3.5/5.0 Reading this memoir of Misty Griffin, the physical, emotional and sexual abuse she survived, was truly unimaginable, heart-wrenching, and hard to read.What was even harder, was living it and writing about it and its so important that she came forward.Misty´s Grandmother was awarded custody of her younger brother, however a few months after Misty´s birth, her parents kidnapped her brother, and an arrest warrant was put out for both parents. For the next few years, the family stayed moving to avoid capture, eventually settling near Topeka, Kansas. Her sister, Samantha was born there, and soon the apartment was raided by police, who returned her brother to her Grandmother and put her father in prison. Her mother moved the girls to Arizona. Misty was not yet 4 years old.By 6 years old, her mother had a new boyfriend, Brian, who moved in with them. He was mean, controlling and would lash out in anger. He insisted they begin acting and dressing like the Amish.Samantha and Misty were sent to live with an Amish Bishop who began sexually abusing them. He changed their legal names and insisted they learn the German Bible. Eventually Misty was able to move away and lead a more stable productive life.When she left the Amish she had a second grade education and severe PTSD. Today she is a nursing school graduate and an activist for Sexual Assault and Child Abuse Awareness groups.Recommended!
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Well written, heartbreaking sad story
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Terrible, shocking, and difficult to read at times. It was very engaging and the author's thoughts and reactions to everyone who believed that the Amish couldn't have any sort of problems were good to hear.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Inspiring and a definite 5 star read. To be honest, when i started this book i actually checked twice to make sure that it was non-fiction. And yes, it is. Misty Griffin is the kind of role model that is needed these days. A young girl who endured years of horrible torture at the hands of her mother and step-father.... only to be given away to a distant Amish community. At first seen as a refuge for her and her sister, her hopes are dashed when she sees what is allowed to happen to women and children in this closed-off way of life. So she speaks up. And moves out. It took guts and determination and Emma/ Misty has it in spades. " Conformity is the jailer of freedom and the enemy of growth."JFK