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    Inside John Barth
    Inside John Barth
    Inside John Barth
    Ebook60 pages41 minutes

    Inside John Barth

    By Diane Dillon, Leo Dillon and William W. Stuart

    ()

    Read preview
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherArchive Classics
    Release dateNov 26, 2013
    Inside John Barth

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      Book preview

      Inside John Barth - Diane Dillon

      The Project Gutenberg EBook of Inside John Barth, by William W. Stuart

      This eBook is for the use of anyone anywhere at no cost and with

      almost no restrictions whatsoever. You may copy it, give it away or

      re-use it under the terms of the Project Gutenberg License included

      with this eBook or online at www.gutenberg.net

      Title: Inside John Barth

      Author: William W. Stuart

      Illustrator: Dillon

      Release Date: April 25, 2009 [EBook #28608]

      Language: English

      *** START OF THIS PROJECT GUTENBERG EBOOK INSIDE JOHN BARTH ***

      Produced by Greg Weeks and the Online Distributed

      Proofreading Team at http://www.pgdp.net

      Transcriber's Note: This e-text was produced from Galaxy Magazine, June, 1960. Extensive research did not uncover any evidence that the U.S. copyright on this publication was renewed.

      INSIDE JOHN BARTH

      By WILLIAM W. STUART

      Every man wants to see a Garden of Eden. John Barth agreed with his whole heart—he knew that he'd rather see than be one!

      Illustrated by DILLON

      I

      Take a fellow, reasonably young, personable enough, health perfect. Suppose he has all the money he can reasonably, or even unreasonably, use. He is successful in a number of different fields of work in which he is interested. Certainly he has security. Women? Well, maybe not any woman in the world he might want. But still, a very nice, choice selection of a number of the very finest physical specimens. The finest—and no acute case of puritanism to inhibit his enjoyment.

      Take all that. Then add to it the positive assurance of continuing youth and vigor, with a solid life expectancy of from 175 to 200 more years. Impossible? Well—just suppose it were all true of someone. A man like that, a man with all those things going for him, you'd figure he would be the happiest man in the world.

      Wouldn't you?

      Sure. A man with all that would have to be the happiest—unless he was crazy. Right? But me, Johnny Barth, I had it.

      I had all of it, just like that. I sure wasn't the happiest man in the world though. And I know I wasn't crazy either. The thing about me was, I wasn't a man. Not exactly.

      I was a colony.

      Really. A colony. A settlement. A new but flourishing culture, you might say. Oh, I had the look of a man, and the mind and the nerves and the feel of a man too. All the normal parts and equipment. But all of it existed—and was beautifully kept up, I'll say that—primarily as a locale, not a man.

      I was, as I said before, a colony.

      Sometimes I used to wonder how New England really felt about the Pilgrims. If you think that sounds silly—perhaps one of these days you won't.

      The beginning was some ten years back, on a hunting trip the autumn after I got out of college. That was just before I started working, as far off the bottom as I could talk myself, which was the personnel office in my Uncle John's dry cleaning chain in the city.

      That wasn't too bad. But I was number four man in the office, so it could have been better, too. Uncle John was a bachelor, which meant he had no daughter I could marry. Anyway, she would have been my cousin. But next best, I figured, was to be on good personal terms with the old bull.

      This wasn't too hard.

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