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    PUN-ishing Tales: The Stuff That Groans Are Made On
    PUN-ishing Tales: The Stuff That Groans Are Made On
    PUN-ishing Tales: The Stuff That Groans Are Made On
    Ebook46 pages42 minutes

    PUN-ishing Tales: The Stuff That Groans Are Made On

    By Barry Ergang

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    About this ebook

    No, it's not about BDSM, S&M, or anything kinky. It's a book of groaners, humorous short stories (some *very* short) that are sometimes peppered with puns throughout but which *always* end with them. If you enjoy word play, or just enjoy something to groan about, you'll have fun with this collection. "All in the Holster" ends with what is the author's "mother of all groaners" to date.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherBarry Ergang
    Release dateSep 15, 2010
    ISBN9781452332369
    PUN-ishing Tales: The Stuff That Groans Are Made On
    Author

    Barry Ergang

    Former Managing Editor of Futures Mystery Anthology Magazine (www.fmam.biz) and First Senior Editor of Mysterical-E (www.mystericale.com/), Barry Ergang's fiction, poetry and non-fiction have appeared in numerous publications, print and electronic. He is a winner of a Derringer Award from the Short Mystery Fiction Society for the best flash fiction story of 2006.

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      Book preview

      PUN-ishing Tales - Barry Ergang

      PUN-ISHING TALES

      The Stuff That Groans Are Made On

      by Barry Ergang

      Smashwords Edition

      Copyright 2010 Barry Ergang

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with other persons, please purchase additional copies for each person. If you’re reading this ebook and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      What follows are works of fiction. All of the people, places and incidents are products of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to real people, places or incidents is strictly coincidental.

      CREDITS

      Rock Around the Flock: A Tale From the Old Country: Z Miscellaneous, Vol. 2. No. 2, March 1988

      Auto-Neurotic, Flush-Out in Flatbush, Everybody’s a Critic!, The Treasure of the Sierra Padré, The Pitch, Sin, You Singers!, Scrap Mettle, A Fair Yell to Arms, A Meating of Minds, Without Foundation, Sing Ho for the Open Road, Sew What?: Flashshot (http://www.gwthomas.org/flashshotindex.htm)

      Gratitude: Ghosts Inside the Machine

      Hardened Artery: The Writers Post Journal, September 2005

      Parental Guidance, Gullible’s Travails, The Petrified Florist: Litbits

      My Father—My Brother, Blind Ted By the Light, and Truant or False: Coffee Cramp eZine, January 2006

      Reciprocity, A Suitable Profession, Cornfinger, Brogue Cop, and Science Affliction: Flashing in the Gutters

      The Mall Tea’s Fall Kin, Gunfight at the So-So Corral: Mysterical-E, (http://www.mystericale.com/)

      The Wagers of Sin: Apollo’s Lyre, Summer 2006

      The Loom of Doom Galls Mainly in the Tomb: Crime and Suspense, November 2006

      All in the Holster: The Thrilling Detective, Spring 2007

      (http://www.thrillingdetective.com/index.html)

      Feedway: One-Screen Stories, March 2008

      ROCK AROUND THE FLOCK: A TALE FROM THE OLD COUNTRY

      In 18—, Ovine Ovinevitch, a Ukrainian sheep rancher, learned that the market in Latvia paid far more for livestock than its counterpart in his homeland. Nearly impoverished by recent misfortunes, he took the news as a sign from God of the way to reverse his circumstances and as a test of his faith. With his devoted servant Moses Lanolinsky, Ovine gathered his flock and set off on the arduous journey to Latvia, buoyant with the prospect of success.

      Proud raisers of beef cattle, the Letts, fearing for their own flourishing commerce, received the news of a sheepman in their midst with dawning peril. Fayro Guernseyev, head of the Latvian Cattlemen’s Association, declared, "If he gets to market, others of his kind might get the same idea about bringing their sheep, and destroy our grazing. We can’t let the Ukraine on our parade."

      He sent a messenger to order the intruder to turn back.

      I can’t, Ovine protested. I have no money; I’ve got to sell my sheep to survive.

      Your sheep pluck up the grass at its roots, said the messenger.

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