The Fly-in Fly-out Bachelor

THE

FLY-IN FLY-OUT BACHELOR

A FIFO Bachelors Guide to Success With Women

BRETT GILBERT

Published by Brett Gilbert at Smashwords

Copyright © 2011 Brett Gilbert

All rights reserved.

Smashwords Edition License Notes

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person,

please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I’d love to personally thank the Fortescue Metals Group (FMG) and all of my colleagues for putting up with me as I juggled career and getting The FIFO Bachelor concept off the ground. I’d like to thank Peter Griffyn Designs - RossWallacePhotography - SquidProductions and Confident Future for offering their generous time and effort in generating the web design, portraits, video productions and personal coaching for this book. And a deeply sincere thanks to all of those who supported me in this endeavor. You’ll never quite know how much your support means to me.

IMPORTANT CAUTION

Although the advice and practices in this book are highly useful, its design has been intended for educational purposes only. It does not serve as a prescription or cure for the clinical diagnosis of mental, physical, spiritual and emotional illness. Please seek the advice of a registered doctor or physician should you be experiencing any such symptoms.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

PROLOGUE

PART ONE: MY FLIGHT TO SUCCESS

Around the World in 80 Fails

Steve the Natural

DUTCH COURAGE DOESN’T WORK

Separate Ways

London Town

The Tipping Point

Home Time

A NEW DESTINATION

How Did I Create Success?

PART TWO: YOUR FLIGHT TO SUCCESS

The Pre-flight Address

GET YOUR PPE ON

The 6 Keys to Your Success

Key concept number 1: Accept everything

Key concept number 2: Work on yourself

Key concept number 3: Learn to love learning

Key concept number 4: Take action

Key concept number 5: Eliminate the concept of failure

Key concept number 6: If it’s not working change it

THE BACHELOR’S MYTH

WOMEN WHO LIKE TO BE TEST PILOTS

Getting a Good Grade (How to deal with women testing you)

CABIN SERVICE FOR YOUR MIND

THE TWO PARTS OF YOUR BRAIN

Part 1: Your Captain (The Conscious Mind)

Part 2: The Unconscious Mind (Your Co-pilot)

Preview to Controlling Your Emotions

MENTAL TOOLS FOR MENTAL RESULTS

Be Happy on Your Journey to Success

Why State and Emotional Control are Critical to your Success

Tools for Happiness

Emotional Control Equals Power

The Power of Goal Setting

Crushing Limiting Beliefs

What You Focus On Is What You Get

The Relationship of Cause and Effect

YOUR IN-FLIGHT MOVIE

YOUR FLIGHT TO MANHOOD

Did You Miss Your Flight to Manhood?

Is the Man Inside Your Character Missing?

Why the Boy Must Die

What’s Been Missing In Your Life

What are the Qualities of a Real Man

PREPARING FOR APPROACH

Approach Anxiety (AA)

Curing AA

Exercise

How to Approach Women More Effectively

Manipulative Authenticity

Offering Value

Opening (conversational starters and the do’s and don’ts)

THE JAMES BOND EFFECT

Effect 1: Social Status

Effect 2: Confidence

Effect 3: Body Language

Effect 4: Personality

Effect 5: Cocky/Funny

WHAT NOT TO WEAR

Important Information About Style

And Let’s Not Forget Grooming

NOW BOARDING… (CONCLUSION)

PROLOGUE

Descending upon Paraburdoo airport for the umpteenth time and soaring high above one of the most profitable pieces of red dirt the world has ever known, I imagine a time in the near future when a stranger approaches me and says, You’re that guy aren’t you? That FIFO Bachelor guy!

Yes, that’s me, I’ll say, and secretly pray they surprise me with a more interesting question than; So do you have a good pick-up line for me?

God I hate that question.

That day is coming. I’ve found my niche, or should I say It found me because I used to feel like just another spike driven into the hardened steel of the world’s richest network of ore-carrying rail but not anymore.

Today, I feel more like one of the mile-long ore trains bearing down on it. On-track, full, almost --- unstoppable...

Okay, I said almost. I’m only human!

Then… Thud!

Sadly separated from my thoughts of micro-future-fame as the 717 slams into the tarmac, I hallucinate an immediate sigh of relief wash over the cabin, its passengers’ "I hope the plane doesn’t crash self-talk replaced by the usual Thank God, now get me off-of this thing" thoughts and slightly cheerful banter.

Safely on the ground in Paraburdoo, (the epicenter of nowhere) a relief washes over me too, as I look down at a bizarre reminder of the prehistoric wiring that lies riddled throughout my body: my sweaty palms. (Hundreds of flights on, it still captivates me).

I’m home, I say to myself, reluctantly sarcastic (if there is such a state), then, willingly accept it will be for another two weeks.

Living the DREAM...?

Actually, yes, yes I am.

INTRODUCTION: THE LAND YOU DREAM OF

So you work in the mining, resources or FIFO (fly-in fly-out) industry and you’d like to book a flight to the land of success with women. Well, come right this way sir. Oh, what’s that? You don’t work in the above fields, but you’d still like to know how to get there? Well, today’s your lucky day because whether you’re one or the other, you’re actually holding the ticket in your hands.

The question is: are you going to use it?

You are? Good! Because this is a once in a lifetime opportunity and I’d hate to see you miss it.

You ready? Great! Let’s go!

I’ll be your host for this flight so get comfortable, and as you’re doing that, allow me to introduce myself.

I’m The Fly-in Fly-out Bachelor: a FIFO chef and your How to be successful with women in your occupational lifestyle coach.

"A chef? A what the… ?"

Yeah that’s right! If you’re a FIFO bachelor in the resources, mining and FIFO industry just like me. If you’re seeking better results with women in your life. If you work away for weeks or months at a time, work or live in a similar industry with similar challenges, or perhaps are newly single.

Then yes, I’m your How to be successful with women in your occupational lifestyle coach. And I’ve written this book for you.

Why?

Because for the last four years working FIFO I’ve made Being successful with women my obsession – and after noticing a wide range of men in the mining, resources and FIFO industry (which I’ll collectively refer to as FIFO in this book) experience the same failures and display the same behaviours that I used to around women, I felt compelled to do something about it – to share my discoveries with others. People like you.

But why me? What makes me the expert?

Well, I don’t claim to be one but in every moment before, during and after work, often still wearing a soiled, stained and stinky uniform, and at every opportunity on R&R (rest and relaxation time) I went to work on myself and this area of my life so I could turn my new-found obsession into success with women. And now, (I’m happy to admit), I’ve been rewarded with the pleasures of success.

Now before you feel the urge to see real evidence of my success, let it be known, unless I personally coach you, I won’t be sharing those details. However, in this book you’ll find out how I turned failure with women into success and at the same time equip you with what I feel are the best mental frames, tools and techniques that can give you the same results.

Because this is where you’d like to go isn’t it? Isn’t that the land you dream of?

Before you answer that, consider these wise words:

"If you always do what you’ve always done you’ll always get what you’ve always gotten. If you always get what you’ve always gotten you’ll always be whom you’ve always been. If you always are who you’ve always been then you’ll always think what you’ve always thought. If you always think what you’ve always thought then you’ll always feel what you’ve always felt and if you always feel what you’ve always felt then you’ll always do what you’ve always done." ~ Lloyd Johnson, friend, NLP practitioner and life coach, paraphrasing Anthony Robbins

PART ONE: MY FLIGHT TO SUCCESS

AROUND THE WORLD IN 80 FAILS

A few years ago whilst living the FIFO dream, I was in a world of confusion. I was lost and looking for answers. I’d hit a brick-wall mentally and emotionally and although not clinically depressed, was definitely in the clutches of depression. With no idea how to rid myself of its clutches, the FIFO dream had soon become a nightmare.

In the midst of that nightmare I felt there was no real purpose or inherent meaning for my life. Had it been to find a girl and settle down, I was no closer to realising this reality than you are to writing this book. Young, virile, and nagged by a constant drive to reproduce, my youth and early adulthood were plagued with loneliness. Then as a full-grown adult, I landed in the FIFO industry, where I received next to no intimacy at all: on-site or off-site. FIFO’s only consistent joy was receiving my monthly pay-check (a healthy sum) but that was little consolation.

In those dark and lonely years I called Margaret River home. A town known well for its world-class surf, natural wonders and internationally acclaimed wine, its offerings were easily overlooked by the high concentration of men, making competition for women fierce and further magnifying my frustrations.

Eventually I became abrasive to my colleagues, friends and family. I became introverted, reclusive, jaded and spiteful. I lost my ability to communicate with and understand people, and somehow managed to turn that inability into a deep resentment toward my family tree and all my predecessors for my failure to attract women. Everything and everyone was to blame. Much of the time I would pretend that everything was fine whilst deep down inside I knew something was wrong, terribly wrong. On-site I would drink copious amounts of alcohol come knock-off time. And when I wasn’t on-site, I came home to an empty house, wallowed in self-pity, watched countless hours of TV and tried to drink the pain away.

A dear friend at the time could clearly tell that I wasn’t enjoying life. He also knew me to be quite the underachiever with women, which probably confirmed his suspicions. He told me he could see I was in a rut and that I should change some of my habits and lifestyle choices. He said, Brett, I know you’re not happy mate, why don’t you just move to the city, there’s plenty of women there? Why don’t you just MAKE THE CHANGE RIGHT NOW?

I would grunt softly, shrug