Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    Suitable for Giving: A Collection of Wit with a Side of Wry
    Suitable for Giving: A Collection of Wit with a Side of Wry
    Suitable for Giving: A Collection of Wit with a Side of Wry
    Ebook70 pages2 hours

    Suitable for Giving: A Collection of Wit with a Side of Wry

    By Jayne Martin

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Whether she’s talking about loss of privacy in the Internet age, “Gone are the days when people only knew things about me that I wanted them to know. Now I can be Googled – and without benefit of lubrication,” or growing up Catholic, “Sticking a symbol of a brutally murdered dead guy over the bed of an impressionable young child and telling her ‘He died for your sins’ kind of messes with a kid for life,” Jayne Martin’s debut book of humor essays will have you laughing out loud from page one. A sharp observer of a world changing faster than new versions of the iPhone, Martin has gleaned this collection from over two years of posts on her popular blog aptly titled “injaynesworld... where nothing is sacred,” where she takes on everything from private parts to politics. With a voice that is both unique and accessible, Martin has crafted a body of work that will appeal to readers of all ages. A funny, fresh, often outrageous compilation, this book is most definitely “Suitable For Giving.”

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherJayne Martin
    Release dateDec 6, 2011
    ISBN9781465779229
    Suitable for Giving: A Collection of Wit with a Side of Wry
    Author

    Jayne Martin

    Jayne Martin is an unapologetic, bleeding heart liberal who writes about everything from politics to private parts on her blog injaynesworld. A TV movie writer, her credits include "Big Spender" for Animal Planet, and "A Child Too Many," "Deceived By Trust," and "Cradle of Conspiracy" for Lifetime. Jayne is the author of the book of humor essays, "Suitable for Giving... a collection of wit with a side of wry."

    Read more from Jayne Martin

    Related to Suitable for Giving

    Related ebooks

    Humor & Satire For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      Dear Frankie

      Jul 31, 2022

      Dear Frankie
      4 min read

    • Article

      Dolly Alderton On Giving Advice

      Oct 22, 2022

      I was at an all-time low when I decided I wanted to try to fix everyone else’s problems. My head was a mess and my heart was broken. It was one of those years where every month brought a new sadness – an annus horribilis, I think they call it. And, i

      3 min read

    • Article

      Why I can finally STOP WORRYING

      Apr 1, 2021

      Last summer, I bought some dungarees. This is hardly news in itself. They were everywhere. Cute, comfortable, comforting in the chaos of a pandemic. But I had a big – biiiig – birthday coming up in a few months. Could I carry them off? And then came

      3 min read

    • Article

      Gender Stereotypes Are Ruining Everything For Everyone

      Apr 28, 2023

      There is a world I can imagine where joy is not limited on the basis of gender. A future where society has let go of the gender stereotypes that we seem to find ourselves desperately clinging to. Right now with the world as it is, I will go into a cl

      1 min read

    • Article

      ‘I Have Certain Women In My Life Who Are Truly Valued’

      May 4, 2021

      Writer Shona Sibary, 49, is married to Keith, 53, and lives in Chichester with their four children, Flo, 22, Annie, 20, Monty, 18, and Dolly, 11. As I was planning my 50th birthday last week it occurred to me that all the COVID restrictions current

      2 min read

    • Article

      On A Bear Hunt

      Feb 17, 2022

      On A Bear Hunt
      6 min read

    • Article

      Self-preservation

      Jun 2, 2021

      Self-preservation
      5 min read

    • Article

      Penny For Your Thoughts

      Aug 23, 2023

      Penny For Your Thoughts
      3 min read

    • Article

      Letters To The Editor

      Aug 27, 2021

      Dear readers, we love to hear your thoughts on the stories that we publish, what is going on around the world, and what the Lord has placed on your heart! Email your letter through to editor@joymag.co.za for a chance to be featured – please try to ke

      8 min read

    • Article

      Letting Go Of My Debt Shame

      Mar 16, 2024

      Letting Go Of My Debt Shame
      4 min read

    • Article

      Jack Unfiltered Monroe

      Oct 29, 2021

      Jack Unfiltered Monroe
      9 min read

    • Article

      Letters

      Oct 15, 2021

      I can so relate to your editorial in the September/October 2021 edition. For me, too, early-morning walks have become a sanctuary. At the beginning of 2020 I was rather voluptuously corpulent, but happy with the way my life was going. I had big plans

      5 min read

    • Article

      The Incurable Optimist

      Sep 11, 2019

      The Incurable Optimist
      8 min read

    • Article

      A Few Words to the Graduates

      Jun 11, 2018

      A Few Words to the Graduates
      7 min read

    • Article

      Balancing Act

      May 10, 2022

      There are two kinds of people in the world: those who talk to strangers at bus stops, and those who would rather walk. I have a number of semi-professional cynical women in my life. Let me be clear, they are not at all unfriendly, and once you are in

      2 min read

    • Article

      Aisling Bea

      Feb 6, 2024

      Being an adult is… Being constantly aware that death is simultaneously very close and very far away, so each day is a rush to slow down so that you can get enough energy from stillness to speed up and get going. What are you worried about currently?

      3 min read

    • Article

      Winning Letter

      Apr 7, 2023

      I’M ALWAYS delighted when we can add extras in the magazine that our readers may want. And I’m hoping you’re going to love the extra puzzle section in the middle of this edition. You’ll notice it’s not quite the same as the usual puzzle pages – there

      5 min read

    • Article

      Flying Solo

      Aug 31, 2021

      Flying Solo
      4 min read

    • Article

      In Her Own Words ...

      Mar 21, 2024

      The other day, my friend Stella, an effervescent 70-year-old, asked me, “What is your definition of ‘old’?” I struggled to come up with an answer. “Pick an age,” she encouraged. “Well …maybe 90?” I offered. “So, 20 years older than we are, then?” she

      5 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for Suitable for Giving

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      Suitable for Giving - Jayne Martin

      Suitable for Giving

      A Collection of Wit with a Side of Wry

      By Jayne Martin

      Copyright 2011 Jayne Martin

      Smashwords Edition

      http://www.suitableforgiving.com

      http://www.injaynesworld.blogspot.com

      This book is available in print at most online retailers.

      Smashwords Edition, License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      To Mom

      For all those times I neglected

      to say ...

      Thank you

      Acknowledgements

      To Margaret Andrews, whose book Sticky Readers should be on every writer’s bookshelf. Thank you for your technical expertise, which made this book a reality and saved me from languishing forever in digital hell. And to the loyal and supportive readers of my blog, injaynesworld, many of whom are also some of the best writers I’ve ever had the pleasure to know, thanks so much for your friendship and encouragement. A writer needs an audience, because when a tree falls in the woods and there’s no one around, it really doesn’t make a sound.

      Contents ...

      The Economy Is Kicking My Ass

      Solo at Sixty

      Junk Mail Blues

      The Reluctant Traveler... Or Hell No, I Won't Go

      Cruisin' With the Top Down

      Don't Drive Over the Wet Cow Paddies

      Serving Guilt With a Twist of Lime

      Like Mother, Like Daughter

      Out of My Hands

      A Disposable Society

      Private Parts

      What's That Sucking Sound?

      If I Was a Rich Girl

      That One Special Dress

      Stalking Nora Ephron

      Bitter - Party of One

      Downsizing for Dummies

      Wherein I Tempt Fate...And Lose

      Suitable for Giving

      The Economy Is Kicking My Ass

      The Time For Service light has been on in my car now for three months. Any time now I expect to see the Hey – I Need A Little Attention Here, light, followed closely by an angry, flashing I Told You So. My car is not the only area of my life suffering from neglect. I’ve taken to wearing hats whenever I leave the house so as not to expose the two inches of gray roots seeping from my scalp. As luck would have it, I live in a rural area where cowboy hats are considered acceptable attire everywhere, but sometimes I throw on a baseball cap just to change things up a bit. I do have to say I’m happy to see that torn jeans are considered high fashion at the moment because that’s pretty much the condition of all of mine and I fully expect to be mistaken for Jennifer Aniston any day now.

      Fortunately, I’ve never required an abundance of food. We have chickens on the farm where I live and they provide a steady supply of eggs. There’s a veggie garden, too, and several fruit trees. What we don’t grow here is easily pilfered from the lands of surrounding farmers, but except for the occasional splurge on a jar of Bacon Bits, meat is a thing of the past.

      Being single has some financial advantages in these lean times. Nobody on Facebook cares if I shave my legs, so I save on razors. Also, the bushes growing on my limbs keep me warm in the winter when I can’t afford heat, and I’ve discovered

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1