No Regrets

No Regrets

A Journey through Life, Love, and Beyond

Connie and Martin Jordan

Smashwords Edition

Copyright © 2011, 2012

Other works by Connie and Martin

BOOKS

So these two Dead Guys Walked into a Bar.

CDs

Only Love is Real – Songs that inspire

Mystikal Vibrations – Instrumental, Inspirational Music

Meditation CDs

To Andrew, PureHeart, for your continued guidance and inspiration through our diamond days, and our stone days.

To everyone that has been in our position dealing with the physical loss of a child.

To all of our true family and friends that have supported us through-out this book, and the space that we have been in creating it.

To all of the staff at All Children's Hospital in Tampa for your continued efforts in helping heal children with terminal Illness.

To everyone of you that pick up this book, and encourage others to read it.

Thank you all from the bottom of our hearts for your continued support in all that Connie and Martin do.

Forward

Live your life with no regrets and die laughing. This will make sure you have lived the fullest life ever. Do not grieve over your mistakes, because without them, there would be no change, and without change there is no progress.

Let people in your life be who they need to be. Do not interfere with their process, and do not allow them to interfere with yours. It is important to know that grief is a process of changes that happen whether you are in the flow of it or not. You have to be gentle with yourself and remember that you are in this process until. There is no end time, and it is different for everybody.

To those of you that know someone going through the loss of someone close to them, give them space, and be there when they need you. You are as important to them as they are to you, so be patient with them.

My goal is that you read this book, and that it helps you get further in your process. Life is too short to be wasted on worst case scenarios. Live from moment to moment, and always look on the bright side of life.

Pureheart

A Letter to Parents

Dear Friend and Fellow-Parent,

In July, 2007, my son, Andrew Jordan was diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia, (A.M.L.) stage 5, a rare form of Leukemia. That day in July, when I thought my son only had maybe strep throat, would forever change my life and shake me to my very core. To hear those words Your son has Leukemia are four words you NEVER want to hear or expect to ever hear about what has always been your very healthy son, but yet I heard them.

The journey we went on the next four months was devastating, intense, stressful, joyful, beautiful, intimate, meaningful, profound, and more. You will read about it all. I was blogging every night so people that knew us around the world could keep up on what was going on with Andrew's treatment. My in laws are all in Ireland as well, and calling was out of the question most of the time, so blogging was my way of keeping everyone informed about what was going on.

No parent should ever have to perform their child's memorial, and yet we had to. Well, I guess we really didn't have to, but there was no one else that deserved that honor other than Martin and I. The three of us started this journey together in May of 1991 when Andrew arrived on this planet, and we were going to end this part of it together in Oct 2007 when he had to leave. We wanted to do our son proud and that we did! Where funerals for children can be quite somber and so filled with grief, as you will read, Martin and I stood up there proudly honoring our son and his journey here with words of wisdom from Andrew, laughter, song and dance. Our goal was to make sure people felt better leaving Andrew's service than when they arrived, and I believe we did just that. The feedback we received from everyone confirmed that also.

This is an open letter to any parents that may be reading this book to keep an open heart and an open mind while reading it. While it may be difficult to read at times, it is my hope that you can see the beauty of our journey with Andrew through all of it, the joyful times and the difficult times. There's power and beauty through it all, but we just have to be willing to look for it.Yes, sometimes we have to look really hard, but when we do, beauty and blessings are there to be found every single time no matter what: Even when your child passes on.

My goal in writing this book is not just to talk about my amazing 16-year-old son dealing with leukemia in such a courageous way. His story, his journey, is so much bigger than that. Leukemia did not define Andrew or his journey.

My goal with this book is that you see YOUR child in Andrew, that you see your child’s gifts, their power, and their wisdom as we did with Andrew.

Andrew is an Avatar, and no, he's not a tall, blue being with a long tail living in Pandora now. A REAL Avatar is a Master Teacher, a bringer of Light, and he definitely is that! You really have to put the right words into Google or all you get are links to the movie, Avatar. Avatar is also a computer representation of you, which is why they named the movie after it.

How did I know Andrew was an Avatar? He told me so. He knew he was. Now that is some real power! Knowing who you are, especially at such a young age is REAL power!

Andrew was not, and is not the only Avatar here on this dimension. Many children that are being born for some time now are very psychically gifted, powerful Avatars. These children have been called the Indigo, Crystal, Rainbow, or The New Children.

What makes these children different from say, you and I? Well, I'll tell you. They are coming here not forgetting who they are, or where they are from on a soul level. Many also know their purpose, and what they are capable of from a very early age. Our job as parents is to support them, and give them a safe, loving environment so they can be who they came here to be, and not try and mold them into who we think they should be! (Or what the so called experts think they should be.) Being a good parent today is about listening to your child, even your baby, because they will let you know what their needs are. Our job is to give them what they need to fulfill their soul's purpose. That is what being a REAL parent means; well to me anyway.

Andrew was always just so happy to be here. From being a very happy baby, toddler, and young child, to being an even happier teenager. Yes, you heard me right! He was a very happy teenager. A rare breed indeed! He felt school was his stage, the students were his audience, and he was there to entertain and have fun. I really don't know where he got that from with his mother being a comedian and father being a singer. The teachers didn't see it his way, so we had to meet with them every month to discuss his behavior, and learning abilities, or lack of, apparently. It always felt like we were being sent to the principal's office every time we got a letter that Andrew would gladly hand over to us saying, Got another letter from my teacher! Then he would be so happy to see us when we went to his school to see his teacher before class. I would inform him that he was in trouble, and he would say, I don’t care! I am just so glad to see you and Daddy at my school! I love you! Then he would give us a big hug.

Who knows; it could have been part of his diabolical plan to suck up to us so he wouldn’t be in that big of trouble because he knew we were a sucker for that cute face of his. Knowing Andrew the way I do, though, he meant every word of it!

When we met with the teachers, we just weren't seeing what they were seeing at home. Yes, he was a very busy guy always running around, talking, wanting you to join him in whatever he was doing, but never a behavior problem, and we certainly didn't see him having a learning disability. They asked me if I had to ask Andrew to do something more than once. Seriously?! I informed them that I also had to tell my teenage daughter, and husband to do things more than once! What was their point?

Andrew constantly amazed us with things he knew from a very young age. When a five year old can show you in a picture how the heart works, I don't think learning is a problem for him. I think it may be the teaching that is an issue! It became very clear what the school system was trying to do when they started labeling him A.D.D., and talking about medication for Andrew. They wanted him to conform to the school system and learn the way they wanted him to learn, not the way he needed to learn. So we took a stand, and Martin took on six of the school administrators at one elementary school Andrew was at in Broward County, Florida as they spouted the benefits of Ritalin. I actually went to high school with the assistant principal at this particular school. Martin took them to school instead! Martin being a research chemist let them know what he knew about Ritalin. We NEVER backed down standing up for our son! No one knew him better than us, and no one was going to put our son in a box he had no business being in.

As my friend, Doug, recently told me, Andrew came here to say Hi Mom and Dad! get to know him here, build your strong, close relationship with him, so he could go back, and the three of you could start your real work together.

I believe Doug is very correct with this! While the hero in this story does cross over, and yes it has devastated me, my Higher Self is humbled and honored to have been his mother. It was my honor to be a part of his journey here, his illness, and be a part of his continued Soul's purpose on this planet after he crossed over. While I didn't want my child to die, I can't help but be humbled, when I see the sacredness of being an intimate part of a Soul's journey in this way.

One of the many things that raising Andrew has taught me is how to live a life with no regrets. Andrew was about living in the present moment, and savoring every single moment of your life, no matter how hard it gets. I know, easy to say, but when you watch a 16 year old do it through the most horrendous of situations, still being happy, and loving his life, you know it can be done. We just need to choose to do it. It was since Andrew crossed that he taught us we need to have no regrets about anything that happened while he was here. As parents making life and death decisions everyday for our child's cancer treatment, you can't help but wonder, What if I didn't sign for this treatment, or should I have signed for that one?

Andrew stopped us in our tracks and said, No regrets Mommy and Daddy! All is as it should be! All truly is in Divine order. I know! Hard to believe that a healthy, strong, brilliant young man getting diagnosed with Leukemia, and then passing, is in Divine Order, but yet it somehow is. When you can live a life with no regrets, you can truly live a life that is so freeing and peaceful. Through this book, it is my hope that you too can learn as we have, to live a life with No Regrets!

In closing, I ask that you be there for your child in ways that they need you to be and throw away how you think it is supposed to be!

Blessed Be,

Connie and Martin Jordan

An Avatar’s Journey Home

I was met by a beautiful energy in the shape of a white stag. He whispered my name, Glan Croi, many times. Many times until my energy resounded with it. It became me, as I became the name.

What does it mean, I asked.

PureHeart. The stag replied.

PureHeart. I whispered in return. It felt right and it felt purposeful.

What do I do now? I asked.

We wait, Glan Croi, we wait.

I waited. I felt so very clear, and very beautiful. Then I remembered my mom and dad, and my sister. I became sad for a split second, and this stag enveloped me. I felt safe. It felt like home to me.

I saw my dad, lost in a moment, but I knew he could see me. I smiled and waved at him. I remember thinking, if he only knew what awaits, he would not be so sad. I also saw my mom, and I admired her strength so very much. I was able to do what I need to do because of them. I have peace, and I will share that with them until we reunite.

I was able to communicate with their higher selves when I ascended. Through their teaching I was never lost. It helped me understand where I was, when so many people don’t. You need to know who and where you are before you cross, else you get lost here.

I still travel with my parents my sister, and their higher consciousness. We are working and loving together. It is my wish that their human cells know and accept this, even the times they cannot feel it; it is so.

I spoke to my dad, and he heard me. I asked him to tell the healers to stop. It was time for me to leave, and get things ready. I am happy. He did not listen to me at first, so I taught him like he taught me. He took his own advice though, and helped me make sense of it. Now he has to help Mommy, and Elatia, but he hears me, so that won’t be a problem.

Are you ready? the stag said.

Ready? What for? I questioned.

They want to celebrate your coming home.

They, who are they?

Follow me: Glan Croi, and you will see.

We left the room, and I found myself at the edge of a beautiful forest. It felt more like home than anything I had ever experienced before. I couldn’t take it all in at first. Images were flashing very quickly. It seems we were moving very quickly, but naturally, at the same time. It just felt right to me.

We came to what I remembered to be a large castle with a drawbridge. Above me was an archway of trees leading into a courtyard containing a fountain that had a large lion statue in the middle of it. There was water coming from the lion’s mouth into the base of the fountain. It’s sparkled and glowed. I drank from the fountain and remembered who I am. It was wonderful and beautifully overwhelming.

The stag was no longer with me, and as I looked back I saw its energy disappearing into the trees. Welcome home, Glan Croi. I heard him whisper as he became one with the trees. It did not matter that he was gone, because I knew where to go from here. Straight ahead, and through the double wooden doors that were in front of me.

As I pushed them open and walked forward, I was transported into a great arena. I realized at this point, that I had not been wearing any clothes. I was naked, but I noticed that I didn’t have any of the needle marks, and other marks that my body on earth had accumulated during my stay in hospital. All of these realizations happened in a split second.

I heard cheering and whistling, and I also heard a loud thundering. I came to awareness and I see what looks like thousands of people sitting around the arena, and standing around the arena, cheering and clapping. I know who I am. I have always known who I am. I remember thinking that this was cool. The initial fear that I had when I crossed was long gone, and in its place was a feeling of yeah, now that’s what I’m talking about!

I was met by my mom, dad, and Elatia, and they took me together with Michael, the Angel, to the center of the arena where there was a large throne-like chair. A lady wearing a green robe came up behind me, and put upon me a beautiful forest green robe. I put my arms through and it felt like I had worn this before. She tied the robe with a thick golden rope which fell to my sides very comfortably.

As I looked around the arena at the thousands of happy faces, I noticed that they were all wearing robes of various colors. They were sectioned according to their colors around the arena. Facing the throne I saw all the people wearing a similar robe to me. They were standing and cheering. My mom and my dad and my sister were seated there.

A tall man came over to me and placed a headpiece on my head. It was silver with an Emerald heart right in the center. We welcome you home, Glan Croi. I sat on the chair for a little while, and then went to greet everyone that I knew. I had traveled many places with all of these people many, many times. I have no regrets, and will always strive to communicate with my parents and my sister, because I realized as soon as I crossed that our work has just begun.

I will see you all very soon and you will remember. We are destined to travel for we are an unstoppable and connected team. Much love and blessings to you. Let’s go, you know you want to.

February 2008

Glan Croi – Pureheart

Prologue

The reason we decided to put Andrew’s journey home in the beginning of this book is because we didn’t want to sucker punch you at the end. We didn’t want you to fall in love with the hero, and make no mistake, you will, only to find out that he leaves this plane in the end. I hate books like that, and didn’t want to write one like it. I think it is only fair that you know this going in.

So why should you read this book knowing ultimately how it ends? Because you will laugh, you will cry, you will see joy where most are unable to find it when faced with a similar situation. You may find healing in parts of your life that need it. Mostly you will be inspired by the courage, grace and love of one young man who touched more lives in his short sixteen years here than most will ever do in their entire life time!

Through his father, Martin, being a professional medium, we did get snippets of Andrew’s journey home soon after he ascended, it was in February 2008, that we got this full channel by Andrew.

The amazing thing is what happened the morning after the channel. Andrew always sends us signs to validate the information we are getting from him. He’s good like that.

The headline story on Yahoo.com the very next morning was that of a white stag being sighted in Scotland. They say they are almost as rare as the elusive unicorn! They also said that a white stag was found murdered by hunters back in late October 2007. We believe it was the same white stag that came to escort Andrew Home.

Why a white stag for Andrew? Andrew was raised in an eclectic household. He was exposed to

Earth based philosophies/religions such as Witchcraft, Wicca, & Shamanism. He felt an affinity for Hern, a.k.a. the Green Man, Cerrnounus, other Celtic deities, and Spirit animals.

We also introduced him to other religious Ascended Masters such as Jesus, Ganesh, Quan Yin, Buddha etc. We taught him that while religion may claim these Ascended Masters, they did not claim religion, they love and honor all.

Andrew knew how to work with herbs, and crystals without us teaching him. He made potions and wands from small branches and crystals. He made up spells, did his own ceremonies and was an all around magickal kid. Hogwarts would have been the right school for him. So it made total sense to us that a beautiful white stag would show up to take our son Home.

You will also realize that Andrew's/Glan Croi’s journey home isn’t really the end, but is only the beginning!

IT’S ALL GOOD!

Chapter 1

THE WONDER YEARS

_____________________

If you know anything about raising boys, nothing can prepare you for the way a son loves his mother, absolutely nothing! Andrew was the first boy on my side of the family in seventeen years. We only had experience with girls so nothing prepared me for raising a son.

Andrew was always a happy baby, toddler, child, and teenager. He was just busy as hell as a toddler and young child. And how many have heard of a happy teenager? They are a rare breed; like the unicorn and white stag.

As a baby I would hear him laughing, and having a great time in his crib like somebody was in there playing with him. Even in the middle of the night in the dark, before his sister made him afraid of the dark that is. Older siblings are great aren’t they? We would hear him laughing and carrying on like his stuffed animals, or something else was in there playing with him.

I raised my daughter to be independent. She was two years old when she went to pre-school, and spoke in complete sentences, and was potty trained. She had not been around other children, so at two years-old I thought it was time for her to be around kids her own age. When Elatia was five months old, up until she was two years-old, I would bring her with me delivering newspapers. I was nineteen when I had her. I wanted to make sure I was the one who was there for her first words, and first steps, so delivering newspapers allowed me to be there for those momentous events in my daughter’s life.

As I mentioned before, Elatia had never been away from me for the first two years of her life. On her first day of preschool she went in, sat down, and asked where her breakfast was. It was me that had the tears and needed to be escorted out! I was happy that she was independent, but it was tough on me. I use to make fun of the kids that would cling to their mothers crying hysterically. I thought, How insecure are those kids? Yeah, I shoulda' kept my mouth shut! I was going to have one of those clingy hysterical kids myself one day; in about eight years.

Andrew was not ready for preschool at two years-old. I couldn’t understand a word he said at three years-old, let alone when he was two. People would ask me what he was saying and I would reply, Hell if I know! Then they would inform me that being his mother, I should be able to understand him. Hey, I didn’t so don’t be judging.

He was not potty trained at two years old either. That didn't happen until the week of his third birthday. That wasn’t until after he left a tootsie roll in my sister’s friend’s hot tub at my niece’s First Holy Communion party. Timing is everything people. Oh I will get even one day.

My sister’s friend was also our mortgage broker, and I brought up the tootsie Roll incident last year when we refinanced our home, and Andrew was with me. Ahhhh! Sweet revenge has come, and it only took twelve years! Yeah, I’m one of those moms that never forget. The funny thing is, my sister’s friend did. She did NOT remember Andrew dropping deuce in her hot tub. I have to say I was really relieved, and I wanted a good mortgage rate. Now that I think about it, I believe she did remember, and Andrew just thought it was all pretty funny. Of course boys always think that poop, farts, boogers, and snot stories are all funny, especially if the stories involved them.

Andrew was attached to me like flies on you know what. He was attached so much so that I had to have several exit points out of my house that I could sneak out of. He was my shadow; such a mama’s boy. Elatia would have to distract him while I made my quick get away, and waited in the front yard for Martin. We had to make sure the blinds were closed as well so he couldn't see me waiting in the yard. If he saw me leaving, we would have to literally pull him off me. Dunno what it is with mothers and sons, but I do know it’s powerful! I mean, Elatia and