Stag-nation
By Jan Tailor
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About this ebook
Damian Johnson, a full-time security guard, part- time smut aficionado and drunk, tells us in his own 95,000 word opus “STAG-NATION”, or “why you should not date a stripper”.
Aside from Damian’s size, XXLT (or in his mind “tall and fat”), his only exceptional assets are the ability to manipulate people or the “business acumen” his father taught him. Damian is blessed with the house his father gave him and the use of a yacht he maintains for his father. Damian hates his father, especially the less honourable way that his father does business. Damian does his best to avoid using this inherited talent, preferring instead to be a slacker with dreams of taking strippers sailing. The reality is that he spends most of his time getting fucked up while playing video game hockey with his deviant, co-dependant best buddy Trevor.
STAG-NATION follows Damian as he falls in love with Janette, a lap dancer that looks like Betty Page. Damian pays for a lap dance with Neyt (Janette’s stage name) while going sailing and for drinks with Janette, unable to figure out if he is really going out with Janette or just paying for Neyt. During the courtship, Damian struggles to keep up with the false reality constructed by GQ and Maxim when he is a fat man with a Honda and reads Hustler.
Damian becomes entangled in all the trite but true realities associated with the sex industry as the relationship deepens – addiction, abuse, self hated, co-dependence - baggage Damian already carries from years of his father calling him “tons of fun” and “fatty”. Meanwhile, Damian attempts to maintain his day- to- day life working as a security guard. The closer Damian gets to Janette, the more alcohol and Trevor get in the way. Damian enters into a downward spiral, catapulting between two conflicting worlds which become increasingly difficult to separate. It ends badly. A “romance noir” as Damian likes to think of it.
Jan Tailor
Jan Tailor is a recluse living in the bowels of Shaughnessy an affluent neighbourhood of Vancouver where the Crème del Crème live therefore there is no need for public transit to run through Shaughnessy.Jan is certain that there has already been a zombie apocalypse because zombies are creatures that do not think and eat the brains of those that do. To Jan it is very apparent this has been happening in society since Bush II’s first term. Since the Orange Troll Revolution, Jan has observed a mutation in the zombies. The zombies now have negative meta intelligence (they don’t know anything but believe they are super intelligent) a trait most concerning. Jan tries to avoid society.Jan believes that society could be helped if it took some mushrooms but Jan has never been able to grow enough – Jan is a bit of a pig, rarely having enough for anyone else. Of course, Jan’s addictions counselor tries to tell Jan perspectives and behaviors can be change without psychedelics. Jan thinks that approach takes too long, even if it is the only “sensible” option.So Jan tries to defend consciousness by writing. It has been said by a fool that the pen is mightier than the sword, Jan is a fool. The act of writing has nearly caused Jan to lose the plot and kill an editor. Jan’s insanity stems from dyslexia, the inability to incorporate English’s irrationalism from thought into writing. Jan believes there is some symmetry in being a dyslexic writer and being a Canucks fan.Happiness comes from acceptance; Jan’s addictions counselor assures. Jan is following this by accepting that dyslexics will not have prefect grammar and spelling. You can expect that Jan did the best job of proofing Jan could do but that will include some errors (if you are a reasonably priced proofreader who likes Jan’s work send a message). Dyslexic’s writing promotes diversity, a thing Jan thinks is good.The sentence Jan lives by is: Searching for the strong argument in the instant of instinct.Jan is supported by George Soros, that is why the works are free. Many readers noticed the story Just Another Prepper was funded by Soros and gave it 1 star reviews. Lookup Just Another Prepper on itunes to read all the great reviews. A feather in Jan’s cap?Over the next few months or years Jan is writing the Salmon Sex and Violence series of stories. All will have technology as a catalyst like Creeper. Will the next in the series, Direct Democracy, be done in the fall or in 2047? Place your bets.Jan’s hobby is fishing and one of the few things Jan will rise during the day for.Jan’s photo is of an orca off of Spanish Bank in Vancouver Harbour. The whales (87 of them) spoiled the fishing that day but reminded Jan people are natural too.
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