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    Humour Through The Eyes Of Tradesmen And Others
    Humour Through The Eyes Of Tradesmen And Others
    Humour Through The Eyes Of Tradesmen And Others
    Ebook104 pages1 hour

    Humour Through The Eyes Of Tradesmen And Others

    By Keith Reed

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    About this ebook

    this book was meant to be for light reading whilst flying between airports but don't be put off you can still read it anyway.
    it is a collection of true short stories, written by a not so short person, who had a short temper in those days brought about by the frustration of the job on the day. there are also some very short stories about my lovable sister in law who has all the best intentions but seems to mess up a little. the family know these times as "valerie moments". read in depth and you will feel the pain.
    some tradesmen will find it interesting as i am sure they would have come across some interesting times with customers as i have. we are all customers too so maybe we should all read it and think about what we put tradesmen through whilst in and around our homes. the humour is not just about tradesmen it is about everyday life. life can be frustrating but time heals and we can look back and laugh about it, or can we?

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherKeith Reed
    Release dateJul 15, 2012
    ISBN9781476097848
    Humour Through The Eyes Of Tradesmen And Others

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      Book preview

      Humour Through The Eyes Of Tradesmen And Others - Keith Reed

      Humour Through The

      Eyes Of Tradesmen

      and others

      by

      Keith D. Reed

      Smashwords Edition

      Copyright 2012 Charles C Moore

      Smashwords Edition, License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      CONTENTS

      You Can’t Have Your Cake…

      A Lesson in Life

      Tram Conductor

      Forward Thinking

      Frustrated Old Man

      Naval Stint

      A Valerie Story

      Frustrated Tradesman

      The Thought Was There

      A Sleepy Watch Dog

      We Are Gathered…

      Express To The City

      Nearly Made It

      Friends and Neighbours

      You Can Be Unlucky

      Ahoy There

      An Easy Solution

      I’ll Follow You

      Ticked Off

      Let’s Have Another

      A Memory From Way Back

      This page is dedicated to my Mother Irene and my Father Joe.

      Who passed away on the 30th May 2004 and 18th October 2010 respectively

      I thank them for the way they brought me up, like any other family, we had our ups and downs but I am happy with the place I share in this world.

      I miss them.

      –

      You Can’t Have Your Cake and Eat It Too.

      ‘Laughter is the best medicine’ a saying that has been around for years it goes without saying that the world would be a sad place without it.

      Laughter is probably what most of us are, taught from a very young age (by our parents). Then we carry that on with our kids and they then do the same with our grandchildren.

      –

      You know the coochie coochie coo’s when rubbing their chests or touching the tip of their nose, trying to stimulate a reaction from them. Then, all of a sudden, there it is, what you have been waiting for, a smile, only to be told by the mother that’s just wind. Oh! Well it looked like a smile. Then there’s the throw in the air trick, kids just love that, you are always treated with a smile or a laugh and quite often the meal they’ve just eaten.

      –

      Most of us start having some sort of conscious memory around two or three years of age. The horseback ride at the age of two there’s dad round and around the lounge floor until exhaustion sets in, but the kid says; more daddy more.

      –

      Of course as we mature so does our humour.

      I remember at the age of about four we were having dinner and just about to be treated to a piece of a beautiful big cake that mum had cooked during the day (it just fitted on one of our dinner plates). When there was a knock on the front door. My mother got up to answer it, as she was leaving the table she said to my father cut the cake and have a piece each. My father looked at me and winked then proceeded to cut the cake in half. Instead of cutting it further he gave me one half and he took the other half. We were about half way through eating it when my mother returned; she took one look at us and didn’t know whether to laugh or cry mum eventually laughed. Dad justifying his action said, You said have a piece each! as he winked at me.

      Sometimes things that are frustrating to some (Mum) can be funny, even hilarious to others, which it was to Dad and me.

      A Lesson in Life

      I was ten years of age and enjoying the Scouts as a lot of boys did in those days. Today I believe girls are also enjoying the boy Scouts, well enjoying being in the boy Scouts mmmm well maybe they are also enjoying the boy scouts.

      I remember one annual Scout camp we went to we were camped next to a creek. We did all the scout-type things like make a break around the fire with stones and made a mug rack from a tree branch stuck in the ground. Dig a one cubic foot hole in the ground and lay a filter of twigs and leaves over it for a drain for draining off the vegetables etc. Dig trenches all around each tent, so if it rained the water wouldn’t go through the tent. Once we completed all of the domestic type jobs, it was then time to do the fun stuff that we really came for.

      It was time to start building a flying fox, but there was this one kid named Jason who was becoming a nuisance. Every time he was supposed to help with something, he messed it up. Not that he wasn’t capable, he was lazy.

      He just wanted to be a nuisance he would sneak around and undo what we had put together so he was brought in front of the Scout Master and Patrol leaders told to pull his socks up or he would be sent home.

      –

      This unruly behavior continued, making fun of people and not doing his share of work. We set off to build the rope bridge over the creek and Jason was right amongst it, but he was telling us kids how stupid we were and that we weren’t doing this or that correctly but he still wouldn’t do anything himself. The Scout Master called time for lunch, so off we went and lined up for our lunch (that was prepared by the leaders). We only had to cook our dinner meal. I think we may not have got anything done if we had to cook or prepare all the meals.

      When we returned to the flying fox, the Scout Master must have had a brain wave and set something in place during the lunch break, because we were all taken in by the next event. Jason was about to be the bunny for once.

      –

      Mmmm the Scout Master muttered in earshot of us all especially Jason. We need to make sure we are building this flying fox level, so how do we do that, boys? he asked. We came up with all sorts of ideas until one kid said, we need a level (I think the Scout Master was counting on someone coming up with that).

      Jason jumped right in and said, That’s stupid how are we going to get a level out here?

      –

      Well

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