Love Drug

Love Drug

Love is a drug that should be handled with extreme caution; may cause a mixture of emotions…

Love Drug

K. K. Harris

Copyright © 2012 K. K. Harris

Smashwords Edition

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each reader. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

This is a work of fiction. Any references or similarities to actual events, real people, living or dead, or real locales are intended to give the novel a sense of reality. Any similarity in other names, characters, places, and incidents is entirely coincidental.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any means without the prior written consent of the Publisher, excepting brief quotes used in reviews.

DEDICATION

I would like to dedicate this book to the love of my life, my number one supporter, my wonderful husband Antonio Harris. You believed in me when no one had a clue what I was capable of accomplishing. Thank you for always pushing me to the next level

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I would like to acknowledge my wonderful family, there are too many to name one by one so please no one take offense. But there are ones that can be pinpointed by what they know they do, these are the ones who let me run my ideas by them as well as read my works to give their honest opinions. Thank you guys so much for your unconditional love, open minds, and constructive criticism. Thank you to my wattpad.com friends for supporting my stories from beginning to end and providing that much needed feedback from an unbiased viewpoint.

Also to my growing fan base, I want to thank each one of you for purchasing my books and overall giving me a chance to live my dream.

I pray you enjoy and God Bless!

1 TAKE A LOOK INTO MY LIFE

Nikki…

I woke up with such an urge to roll over throw the covers over my head and ignore my stupid ringing phone alerting me that it was 6:00 am, God I could just sleep all day, oh how I love to sleep, I said a loud to myself. But soon realization sunk in, that won’t be happening anytime soon today, as I threw the covers back and grumpily dragged myself out of bed and to the bathroom. Although I have the privilege to set my own work schedule and my coursework plus exams for this semester have been finished, my mom asked me to help her move my auntie to her new apartment. Rolling my eyes at the thought of why two women will be moving my aunt’s heavy ass furniture. First off, most of the men in my family suck like salty balls, they are lazy, trifling, and undependable. Not that I have tasted salty balls or anything but I am what most call a cynical SOB, ok daughter of a biatch. Whatever!!! Secondly, my auntie is disabled, sucks I know. My favorite cousin/big brother would be the only male that would be available but I feel bad for pulling him from one of the busiest days of a Barber’s week. I know he would drop everything and come help but I didn’t even tell him because it’s not fair that the rest of these busters in our family are so unreliable when it’s time to help others but always have their hands out for a little something. Freakin’ free-loaders!

 Either way I start my shower in hopes of waking up so I can get this day started as quick as possible. The quicker I can get done means the quicker I can get back to my favorite place in the world, HOME!.  I am definitely, what some people call a homebody. Don’t get me wrong I can cut up with the best of them but the kicking it scene is over and done with, as the saying goes Been there, done that. Plus these ninja’s now a days have no respect for others. Can’t go to a party or club now days without blows being thrown or someone taking it to the most extreme case and start bussing. Really??? Is it really that serious? Oh how I miss the old days. I laughed to myself thinking ‘as if I’m that old’. I am only 24 and a scrumptious 24 I might add. I am what modern day society would call a big girl, thick girl, plus-sized, fat etc.  I prefer scrumptiously thick much more, thick like a Porterhouse steak. Call me conceited, I say if I don’t love me than who will.

Although I love me, I still wonder why I am single yet again after being in a couple of dead end relationships. I don’t get it, I mean I am the color of warm caramel topping, my heart shaped face is free of blemishes, cat like eyes the color of a light hazel, a plump nose but it fits my face, and beauty mark slightly under my  plump lips that add some sauce to my features. Oh and its real, not drawn on like so many girls used to do back in the day. I don’t wear makeup only lip-gloss. So to me I am quite a catch, don’t get me wrong I am far from perfection, I have my flaws. But nonetheless I am single, URRGHH, I went on and on with my rant. I have some pent up frustrations. I need a friend, homey lover friend, booty buddy, or something. I laughed out loud again because I know I am all talk. I am afraid to get down like that because I’m a big softy; I get in my feelings to quick. Oh well, I thought. It sounds nice but I know I am too sensitive when it comes to stuff like that; unfortunately, I wear my heart on my sleeve. And that’s exactly why it’s been trampled. I will learn one day, I guess.

 Enough of the pity party, I finished with my shower, brushed my teeth, and rubbed down with my Shea butter, almond oil mix. I pulled my au natural bra strap length henna colored auburn curls into a low ponytail and made a bun. I dressed in some old jeans, put on an oversized sweat shirt, grabbed my beat up gym shoes and I was ready to roll out. I grabbed my wallet from my purse, got my keys, lip-gloss, phone, and went down the stairs to my garage. No sooner than I got in the car, the phone rang with a very familiar ring tone. I rolled my eyes and swiped the screen to answer, Yes mother, I said. She laughed as usual.

Are you up and moving around yet? I laughed, she knows me so well cause I surely contemplated hitting snooze a few times.

Yes ma’am, as a matter of fact I am pulling out of the gate now, thank you very much, with usual flippant tone.

She chuckled, do you want anything from McDonald’s?

I sighed, But of course, I need a caramel frappe and a bacon, egg, and cheese sandwich. I love those darn things.

Ewww, I hate coffee, she said. She always says that and I just laugh because it’s her loss.

I will meet you at auntie’s house, I told her because I wanted to get off the phone and bump some tunes to make myself a little more upbeat. She agreed and hung up.

It is the first week of December in this god-awful boring city of Little Rock, and the weather here changes faster than I change my panties. I had the heat on just a little to take the chill off and had the volume up on my radio bumping a mix from my IPOD. I took it old school for today with a little No Limit, yup I know I went way back with that group. Who really cares, nobody is in here but me. While I bumped tracks ranging from Head, Shoulders, Knees, and Toes, to Bourbons and Lacs. I finally pulled my 2009 Maxima up to my auntie’s house to see my mom had just pulled up in her big Chevy 1500 king cab, I love that truck. We work hard; we might as well play hard right. After my auntie, my mom, and I bumped our gums for a few minutes. We start loading up this and that to get this over with before the whole day is gone. Finally after making five trips back and forth from one space to another we were finally done. My auntie tried to pay me but I wasn’t having that, but wouldn’t you know the little sneaker put it in my cup holder when I wasn’t looking. I love my auntie.

We chatted for a few when I looked at the clock and realized the day was still young, who says chicks can’t be just as productive as men when it comes to moving shit. I chunked them the deuces and decided I would hit the Liquor store for some wine to relax with because I had no plans for the night. Then I remembered I looked like pure crap, hell I might meet my future husband. I know hilarious, even I had to laugh at that one but to save face I decided to go to the one liquor store in a hood where I shouldn’t run into anyone that I know or that I would be ashamed to be seen the way I look. What’s the worst that could happen, right?

Brock…

I woke up this morning after kicking it with my boys last night playing PlayStation and shooting the shit after work. I am dreading going into work today but oh the hell well, money talks. I received another text from that dumb tramp I wasted 2 years on, glad I figured her shit out before I popped the question. FUCK!!! I yelled. I almost messed up and made the biggest mistake of my life, oh well lesson learned won’t ever make that mistake again. Hoes can’t be trusted, bitches all the same. I can’t believe this broad had the nerve to try and use me for her personal gain but still do her like I didn’t fucking matter. I was good to her too. And to think I finally decided after all the hints and threats she made to me just to get me to propose to her, I broke down and bought a 2 carat marquise cut diamond. She didn’t have a clue that I took off for a week from both businesses to take a trip up to Memphis to visit, pop the question and spend some time with her. I lay in my bed staring at the ceiling thinking about that dreadful day that will forever haunt me.

Flashback…

 "Hello?"  I answered.

"I am so sick of this shit Brock!" April said.

I sighed. This shit is getting old and I am so sick of having this argument. What are you talking about April, tired of what? I asked.

She clucked her tongue. You’re always busy doing this and that or working. I don’t know what you’re doing down there while I’m here alone. For all I know you are fucking all kinds of hoes…

I rolled my eyes to the heavens, took the phone off my ear with a feeling like I was in the twilight zone. What the hell is she ranting on and on about this damn time? It’s always something. It’s never a Hey Bae, how are you? Hell I can’t even get an I miss you from her ass. And she still was going on and on about something as I zoned out. What…

She cut me off, I’m not done….I think we need some to call it quits for a while and think about if we really want to be together. She finally said.

I couldn’t believe that she just said this because I was literally on the highway with her in mind and Memphis being my destination. I started seeing red like really this was not happening to me right now. I was speechless. She took that as a sign that the conversation was over and decided to end her tirade with It’s over and I quit. And she hangs up the phone. Mind you, I pay the phone bill but that’s how she ends this shit. I had it in my mind to call and have her bitch ass service disconnected. 

I just kept driving while my mind was a million miles away questioning myself for still driving in the direction I started. Maybe I should turn around and go back. I didn’t want to call my boy D because he would just tell me to bring my ass back cause he couldn’t stand April anyway. But I have been with this girl for 2 years and that’s a lot of time to devote to one person just to throw it away over a petty argument here and there. The only reason I am proposing is because I really want to stop all this arguing about the same shit day after day. I am too busy hustling and making money to deal with more than one female so she should know I ain’t with anybody but her. I don’t understand why she is so insecure I mean damn she the one that decided to move her ass to Memphis from Little Rock. How the hell she just expects me to follow her ass like a puppy, nah not gone happen.  This day was not supposed to go like this. I had just left checking on my store, and tying up some loose ends with one of my connects to make sure my shipment was moved properly. I hit the highway at 7:30, making good time. Memphis is only 2 hours or so away doing the speed limit. I figured we could grab a late dinner and I could pop the question. Then I get this fucked up phone call I was beyond pissed at this point. I had it in my mind to just turn around and go back home because honestly I really was tired of this ongoing argument of whether I was going to commit with a ring and how much I hustled. But her ass ain’t complaining when she spending the money. Why me? I might as well get this shit over with to determine whether I want to devote my life to this chick or separate for good. Maybe we would just address this issue of her not trusting me and rest her fears that I was committed to her so we can move forward. I was in such deep thought that I didn’t see the state trooper until the flashing lights caught my eye. DAMMIT!!! I growled. I was only 30 miles outside of Memphis when I got pulled over for speeding.

While I waited on the officer to return with my license and registration I went back to thinking about this bull I’m going through and why. She wants me to move there to Memphis to be with her. Damn she is all about herself and I just keep giving and giving. What about me? Damn that, I am not gonna sit here and sound like a whiney little bitch but I would love it if I was the recipient of some sort of giving other than some ass when she is trying to bribe me into doing something.

After I got my ticket from the officer I was on my way again, I had to look at the bright side at least I wasn’t blowing like I normally do on this lonely ride. I pull up at her crib about 45 minutes later trudging to the door not looking forward to this altercation at all. I knocked on the door, no answer. I had a key but I didn’t feel right using it for some odd reason. I knocked a few more times with a little more umph when I was greeted by some nigga with no shirt or shoes on… That’s when in the movies you hear the music letting you know something bad is about to happen… (dun, dun, dunnnn) REALLY????

Me and this nigga having a staring match, making me feel like I’m in Elementary school or some shit.

"Where the fuck is April?" I asked cause I’m heated right now.

"Who wants to know?" This nigga had the audacity to ask me with a mugg on his face.

"Baby who’s at the door?" I heard April ask. Oh hell this bitch didn’t just call this nigga baby and was just screaming at me on the phone about how I don’t pay enough attention, cheating with other bitches bull shit, and she laid up with this nigga. WOW…

April came to the door with the red silk robe I bought her ass. Once she realized it was me, she had the 'deer caught in headlights look on her face,' her mouth was wide open in shock forming a perfect letter O.

As if she was suddenly slapped back to reality, she finally said my name. Brock?! like I was a damn ghost or some shit. I shook my head and turned to walk away without so much as a goodbye or a dog kiss my ass. I knew if I stayed a second longer and tried to say anything, I would have been going to jail in Tennessee. I am too far away from home for that shit. I have concluded that bitches ain’t shit. I’m done!!!

 Back to reality.

All this shit happened a little over 2 weeks ago and I’m still having a hard time controlling my anger. Then this silly rabbit decides to blow up my phone twenty times a day. I roll out of bed tired of thinking about this shit but damn it’s hard, I mean I had love for this chick. I mean I wouldn’t say I was head over heels in love with her but she was loyal or so I thought. She knew about my legal and not so legal businesses and she didn’t trip. I laughed to myself because if that tramp every tried to turn tables on me love or no love I would have to treat her like the rest of these snitches on the street and make sure she got plenty of stitches to sow her mouth shut. She has been calling with all kinds of apologies and even a few threats. I couldn’t believe she had the balls to call and threaten me. She already knows how I get down. I’m not the one to go around beaten on a broad but the fact remains don’t fucking threaten me because yo shit fucked up.

Speaking of the damn devil. What? I growled.

Why didn’t you answer the phone last night? Prolly laid up with one of your hoes. My cousin told me she saw you with some bitch all in your lap at the club. She said nastily.

…… Silence.

BROCK!!! she screamed.

WHY THE FUCK YOU STILL CALLING MY DAMN PHONE? she must not understand English.

Don’t yell at me and this is not over, we still have things to discuss. You can’t just throw 2 years away because of a mistake. I mean I was feeling lonely, and David was willing to give me some attention. Something you didn’t have time for, hell that stupid nigga Darryl see’s you more than I do. What did you expect me to do? She said like that would really make me feel better. She has been spitting this same speech since that dreadful day.

What the hell you want from me April? I asked tired of this shit.

Give us another chance. I love you. I just looked at the phone because she hardly ever says those three words.

Please. She starts sniffling into the phone. I really don’t want to hear this shit today.

Look we will talk later, I don’t want to think about this shit right now. I gotta go. I said to get her off the phone in hopes that she would not call me anymore today.

But… I hung up before she could complete her statement.

I know I sound love sick as hell to entertain the notion of thinking about getting back with her. I just need to think but not right now.

 I finally get up to do my usual, shit, shower, and shave. Scratch the shave cause I gotta hit up the barbershop for my weekly appointment anyway with my boy D. We grew up in the same hood and been running these streets ever since we learned to flip a buck. We are not only business partners we are brothers. I will ride for him whenever and wherever. Once I was dressed fresh to death with polo jeans fresh from the cleaners, a purple polo shirt, with a pair of fresh black air max with the purple swoosh. I might be from the hood but I like to look good when I step out. That sagging shit is for fags in the pen, that’s not how I roll. I rolled out to hop in my truck after I grabbed my partner in crime sweeper, my phone, wallet, and keys. I put sweeper in his spot in my console and proceeded to get right, I might hit the club tonight to see what’s out for grabs. Since I am newly single right now and I ain’t cut nothing but April in two years, I think it’s high time to see whose offering.

A chorus of what’s uppers were exchanged once I stepped foot into ‘Deez Cutz’.

What’s up mane? D said as he looked up from finishing a line on a little dude.

Nothing much mane, what’s happening? I said taking a seat.

Shit mane, just getting it in this morning. He said looking back at me.

What? I asked because he was looking at me like he wanted to say something else but he remained silent.

Spit it out dude, why you looking at me like that? I asked getting a little defensive.

April called my phone dude asking me to talk to you on her behalf. He said with that look I know so well. He was saying in a way only I would understand Like that shit was going to really happen.

I laughed sarcastically. She can’t stand you let her tell it, how the hell did she get your number? I asked.

Hayley stupid ass. He said with much attitude.

Oh. I said.

Little dude’s mom came in just when D was done cutting his hair. I only glanced at lil mama but I could feel her staring at me like she was trying to get my attention. Not my type at all. I don’t do eager chicks. Don’t pursue me let me be the dog, I want to chase the cat. What the hell it look like a cat chasing a dog? She finally got the picture that I wasn’t interested because she finally left.

Get in the chair dude. She was throwing the pussy at you and no catcher’s mitt was needed. What the fuck bruh, it ain’t like you are committed to that devil anymore. You are free from the slave Massa. He said bussing a gut laughing with a couple guys close by laughing as well.

Bruh, you know I hate broads trying to pick me up, let me decide if I wanna holla or not. Too damn forward, shit she needs to be worried about her kid not trying to holla. I said. Several guys in the barbershop nodded their heads to my statement.

You are right and ole girl has been around the block a time or two. He said.

I thought for a minute that sounded too familiar. So you already cut, huh. I said a statement.

He bussed out laughing again. Ummm nah……… Just head. He said with a smirk.

And you wanted me to holla? I asked.

I knew you wouldn’t I was just fucking with you. He said.

While I was getting oh so clean cut, the entire shop got into idle chat about this and that nothing in particular. Once I was done I gave my boy dap and told him I would holla at him later cause I had to get to the liquor store to open up for the day. I had some paperwork to do. I am determined to make today a good day.

2 THEY MEET

 I zoomed into the parking lot of the LIQ store without a care in the world. You don’t need to call in to work cause you’re the boss, I am singing so hard I had to laugh at myself. I was bumping Beyoncé’s song Ego.

I didn’t check my appearance or anything before I got out of the car; I must be tripping or not messed up one. Let’s make this quick so I can get home, take a shower, and relax. I step in and the guy working the window is carrying on a conversation loudly, laughing with someone. I didn’t even really look in his direction but he has a sexy laugh. I smile to myself. I go straight to the Moscato, a couple of different bottles should last me the weekend. I’m not an alcoholic but I have what some would call a high tolerance…

How are you doing today? The guy with the sexy laugh says.

I reply, Fine and you? saying all of this without even making eye contact, I just glanced in the general area the voice came from. I continued to study the wine selections.

Wonderful! was his reply.

For some strange reason I felt like someone was staring a hole into the back of my head. I didn’t even realize someone else had walked in. I must be focusing too damn hard on my selection. I heard someone hiss, Damn.

I looked up to find the guy at the counter looking at me like I was on the menu and the guy behind the counter was also looking amused by the entire incident. I just looked away with total disgust, like really. Nigga kick bricks, was all I could think and accidently let it slip out loud but kinda low so hopefully no one heard me.

Obviously, he heard me because I heard him cuss again. But he got the hint that I could care less because he made his purchase and quickly left. No doubt some ignant thug buying a pint of something or some squares. I absolutely hate it when some thug ass ninja tries to holla with whack game. I mean damn don’t just stare say something other than Damn or Shit. Don’t get me wrong I am far from snooty or anything but gun toting drug-selling thugs just is not my cup of tea. I approached the counter finally with my chosen companions for the weekend.

So where is the party at? And can I come? the dude behind the counter asks with a chuckle referring to the four bottles of wine on the counter.

Finally, I make eye contact with him and I was actually speechless for a millisecond.

Sure if you don’t mind a party for one. I said with a smile. Seriously no party going on, too exhausted for that.

He smiled with the prettiest teeth I have seen in long time on a guy. No gold’s, no discoloration, and he have dimples. WHAT THE HELL…

That’s hard to believe especially with you having dudes checking you out and shit like ole boy that just left. He said still smiling.

Please he couldn’t even form a complete sentence. I’ll pass. I said rolling my eyes.

Maybe I can come through and keep you company. He states with that flirtatious swag.

Interesting I thought before I could fully think properly I flirted back. Sure why not? I said.

Oh for real, well write down your number and I will give you call later. He said.

Still not thinking with my right or left-brain just yet. Ok. After signing the charge slip for my purchase. He slid me a piece of paper and I wrote my name and number down. Collected my bag and proceeded to leave with him still looking.

I turned when I got to the door as I was walking thru and he was still looking with the sexy smirk. WHAT THE HELL.

Once I got in my car cheesing like a Cheshire cat. I pulled into traffic and proceeded to go home when I finally said out loud, what the hell just happened? I didn’t even get his name. Oh god I am truly stuck on stupid. Since I just made myself look too available and maybe even a little desperate I figure he probably won’t even call.

Once I got home and looked in the mirror I groaned because I know he isn’t going to call now for sure, I look a hot damn mess!!! My hair had come out of my ponytail, the lip-gloss was nearly gone, and my clothes were busted. REALLY?  I said to my reflection as I was about to undress. Oh well chick, I guess that just wasn’t meant to be. But he sure was a cutie.

After a nice soak in the tub, I decided tacos for dinner would be the bomb.com cause Mexican food is my absolute favorite. I finished my tacos and decided to check my Facebook, returned some text messages I received throughout the day, cleaned up my house, and then found me a good movie to watch.

I was chillaxing on the sofa watching the Nightmare on Elm street marathon that was on and my landline started ringing. I was a little surprised cause not many