Finding Mommy

Chapter 1

The beginning is always the hardest to remember. The days in between just seem so long. It was raining. That she could remember. Why does it seem that whenever something tragic happens, it’s always raining? Now a light sprinkle…that wouldn’t have been so bad. But this was a downpour. This was God flushing his toilet. It all came down at once. And there, right in the middle of it, was one innocent mom, one seventeen year old daughter, and of course not to mention…one six year old boy, who was about to grow up very fast.

School shopping. The first day of school only five days away, and to everyone’s agreement, today, Thursday August 7, had been set aside just for that. Mom, or Chevy, yup after the truck, took the day off. She even turned off her cell, which is normally non-stop during the week, just to spend some quality time with her two babies. Well, they weren’t babies anymore. She was pretty sure her daughter Lauren may have launched all the way up from first ear piercing at six, first training bra at nine, first period at eleven, first dance at twelve, first kiss at twelve, first wrecked car at sixteen, first time well you know, she could only hope, seventeen. She looked over at her daughter who was flipping through the pages of Seventeen and popping her watermelon Bubble Yum. Her long beautiful red hair was pulled back in a ponytail. Her fierce blue eyes bounced from left to right as she discovered whom Britney Spears had been dating. Seeing her sitting there, looking so mature and innocent made her feel old. It just seemed like yesterday she herself was popping chewing gum and skipping class to run off with Roy Lanely. They would go down to the river and swim, read poetry to each other or just sit and talk while staring at the water as it trickled out over all the rocks, cleansing and purifying both the water and her spirit. No more times like that. It seems now all she could do is relive it a little at a time through her one and only daughter.

She reached out and pulled back a few stray hairs, which had escaped and threatened to block Lauren's view of her magazine. Lauren looked over at her mom.

I love you. Chevy was holding back her eyes from watering. This always happened when looking at either of her children, she always felt like squeezing them tight to her and never letting go. Lauren smiled and reached out and turned up the radio a little bit. She thought she heard a song she recognized. Ah yes, You better talk to the one that made you. You better talk to the one that made that…. light…in your eyes. Lauren was singing and nodding to the music.

Mom, make her stop will ya? Little Bryan in the back, only six but cocky enough to be thirteen, was making a puking gesture with his finger going down his throat.

What’s a matter Bud, you afraid your sister's gonna outsing you?

Oh please, Walter's violin sounds better than that. Walter was their next-door neighbor who liked to sit out on his porch and practice his newly found talent of playing the violin. What Walter and Nancy take to sound like music, comes across to their neighbors as nails across a chalkboard. But due to him dropping his old hobby, of stretching in his gym shorts (and nothing but his gym shorts), they decided the scratching sounds from the violin haunted their memory throughout the day a lot less than picturing old Walter out doing jumping jacks in the front yard with wrinkly flesh flapping everywhere.

Lauren continued to ignore the comments from her little brother as she learned to do with such sophistication last year. She just kept on bobbing her head from side to side, smiling and throwing a few smiling glances toward her mom and singing You better talk to the one that made you, you better talk to the one that made that...light…in your eyes.

Ok. Bryan. Chevy decided she would stop the war before it began. Do you have your school list?

Yep Bryan was smirking and bouncing his head back and forth on the seat. The boy never sat still.

Ok. What’s on your list?

Um… Bryan unfolded his list and looked down at it. He was about to tell his mom what he needed when it occurred to him Mom, I can’t read cursive. You know that silly.

Oh right. Lauren, grab your brother's list and read it off to me, would you please?

Lauren who was in the middle of an incredibly big Bubble Yum bubble, slapped the Seventeen in her lap and while rolling her eyes turned and snapped the paper out of her brothers hands.

Hey I was reading that! Bryan clearly didn’t appreciate having his property or what he felt was his property rather, stolen as opposed to given up. His sister however, enjoying the torture while she could, just turned and stuck out her tongue.

Stop that Lauren, now what do we need?

Lauren turned in her seat and began to scan the wrinkly contents of the page. Well it says here that he needs an M-16, a rocket launcher, a couple of grenades, and a switch blade. Oh, and it says a Glock is highly recommended but not required.

Cool! Bryan’s face lit up at the sound of a rocket launcher and switchblade.

Um, I don’t think so. Lauren quit giving him ideas. I’m sure that list is perfectly acceptable in some schools, but Landmark Grade School I’m told, frowns on M-16’s and rocket launchers. Chevy looked at Lauren as if she was trying not to burst out laughing.

Oh Lauren mouthed as if she didn’t know and turned to look at the sheet again. Well, it says we need two pocket folders, one pair of scissors, five pencils, one box of crayons, Elmer’s glue, and a book bag. Oh . . . and a partridge in a pear tree. She thought that last part was funny.

Her mother on the other hand just rolled her eyes, smiled, and said Always a comedian.

As a senior in school, Lauren was looking forward to returning. Not because she liked school, but because it was the last year until college when she would be out on her own and free. That’s right, finally free at last. Not that she was held prisoner or anything. Actually, her mom trusted her more than most moms trust their daughters. Like last Friday for instance, her mom let her go out with her friends and she didn’t return until one in the morning. Some moms would have freaked out about that but not Chevy. Nope, Chevy was cool with a capital K. Your mom is the bom. Her friends would say. But on the other hand Lauren did have a good head on her shoulders, and after all, why shouldn’t she be trusted? It was Lauren after all who took a cab home three months ago when her boyfriend had been drinking at a party and was trying to give her a ride home. It was Lauren who dumped him when she found out he had driven himself home that way. Besides that, she was an honor student, president of S.A.D.D., the Environmental club, and one of the best basketball players that the Haley Eagles had seen in years. But just the same she couldn’t help but dream about getting her own place, doing her own dishes and laundry, inviting her own guests over for dinner or to watch the game. It would be her place and her rules. It all sounded like fun to her. Of course she realized that she was going to have to work more hours. Right now she only worked about ten hours a week cutting roses for a flower shop. She would have to find a new job with more hours, but if that was the price of freedom, so be it. Oh well, that’s a year away. She thought. Why worry about that now? One more year under Mr. Balenstine, the school principal. She was sure that there weren’t many nice principals out there anyway, but she thought he was a real prick. He was always giving her that look that said 'I’m watching you Lauren. I’m waiting for you to fuck up, so I can put you in detention.' He wasn’t exactly ugly, he just looked stern. He had dark eyes that could pierce you, and his glasses seemed to magnify the effect. He was thin with dark balding hair, which had been combed over to one side to make it look full. Who was he trying to impress anyway?

Whatcha thinking about hon? Chevy asked.

Lauren didn’t even realize she had spaced out until now. Her mom was looking at her with concern. Lauren smiled at her and looked out the windshield to avoid her stare. Mom, watch out! Lauren screamed at the top of her lungs with the most horrified look on her face Chevy had ever seen.

It just seemed to happen slow motion from there. Chevy’s head turned slowly back toward the front. She had about point five seconds to take in the situation: a semi truck was stopped less than twenty feet in front of her. Twenty feet is nothing when traveling fifty-five miles an hour.

An accident up ahead had caused everyone in front of her to come to a screeching halt. The two seconds that Chevy had turned to look at her daughter was all it took. Chevy knew that if she tried to swerve to the left and miss, she would run her daughter's side of the car into the semi. Even if she made it, she might go head-on into an oncoming vehicle. She quickly decided to swerve to the right and with any luck maybe, just maybe she would be the only one to get hurt. She made the turn. All in all from the time she turned her head to look at her daughter to the time she swerved to the right, three seconds was all that had passed.

Chevy swerved and felt a bang. Heard a bang as if she had hit the semi, but as far as she could tell, she had made it around. She drove off the side of the road, through the grass, down an embankment and slowed to a stop just before Sleepy Creek.

She was in shock. All she could do was continue to stare straight ahead at the creek as it flowed gently over the rocks, taking away, little by little, the shock and pain and fear. Chevy’s arms were trembling. She felt frozen, like her hands were glued to the wheel.

"Breathe Mom" she heard from a distance, and in her mind she heard her daughter's voice and realized her lungs had been frozen as well. She relaxed and blew out a hard gasping breath like one does when holding one's breath under water for a long time and like a whale and its blowhole, the air is forced through the lips.

Holy crap that was clo… Chevy cut herself off and another wave of panic and anxiety filled her as she turned to look at her daughter and found that the seat was empty. Her eyes turned in their sockets toward the window, expecting to see some hole that her daughter must have went through. Nothing. Now she turned quickly toward the back and yelling, no screaming, the name of her one and only son. Bryan! And again she was in horrified shock. Her daughter whom she expected must have landed in the back seat was not there. Her son, Bryan Samuel Berry, was also not in the back seat.

Chevy’s lower lip began to quiver. How could this be? They had been in the vehicle hadn’t they? Wasn’t this Thursday August 7th? Wasn’t this the day they had agreed to go school shopping? Wasn’t it her daughter’s eyes she was looking into right before she swerved to hit the semi? Her head was swimming with possibilities. No broken glass. No open doors. Was this the right day? Maybe she was on her way to sell a house and the kids were in school… Yes that must be it. She thought. The kids are in school; I was on my way to an appointment, when I swerved to avoid the semi. She looked over at her daughter's seat and saw that the seatbelt was still buckled. That’s odd. She unbuckled her own belt and turned all the way around in her seat and looked at Bryan’s seat belt. The same. Buckled.

If they hadn’t been in the car, why would their seatbelts be fastened? She spoke aloud and suddenly became aware that her ears were ringing. They must have jumped out of the car. Why would they do that? Maybe they thought that we weren’t going to make it… They must have reacted with more speed than I thought they could have. With renewed hope Chevy opened the car door and jumped out. The grass was high and came up to her knees. She fell the moment her feet hit the ground. Her legs were a little wobbly it seemed. She could smell radiator fluid and looked up at her hood and saw steam and fluid spraying out underneath. So much for driving back up. She thought.

Chevy stood up and started back toward the road, searching the grass, certain that Lauren and Bryan must be there. Lauren! She meant to yell, but it came out as a weak broken up attempt. Laaaauuurennnn. Brrrryyyyaaannn. This time it came out as an ear-piercing yell. It echoed back at her. She was now walking much quicker toward the road. Laaaaauuuuurrrreeen. Brrrryyyyyaaannn." She yelled again, and again was slapped in the face by her own echo. Now she had broken out into a run, finally approaching the road.

She stepped out onto the road and again, panic, confusion, fear, froze her. She thought at that moment, this was it. She had officially lost it. Ladies and Gentlemen, Chevy Berry has officially gone to the nut house. Nothing. As far as the eye could see. (And last time she checked, she was twenty twenty. No semi, no accident, no cars, no people, no motorcycle, trucks, vans, nothing but road in either direction. What the…?

She felt like she was going to fold up and turn inside out. Nothing. Nothing had ever happened like this before. Had she taken some medicine she was reacting to? Am I hallucinating? Maybe I'm dreaming… If she was, this was the most crystal clear dream she had ever felt. She could hear the wind blowing through the trees. She could smell the radiator fluid. She heard the stream. How could this be a dream? And where is the traffic? She stared out for a few more moments and finally decided the best course of action would be to sit and wait. Yup. That’s what I'll do. I’ll sit here and wait. Either someone will show up and help me or I will wake up. One or the other. But still… where the hell are my babies? Chevy sat down hard. So hard, her butt stung when hitting the pavement. Thank God she wore jeans and sneakers today. Had this been any typical day, she would be wearing a dress and dress shoes. But today was not a typical day. Chevy drew her knees up to her chest and began rocking herself back and forth. What would her friends say if they could see her now? She had always been known as Chevy, Like a Rock. Fearless, strong, smart, and down to earth. But this…this was not her. This was different. If she had come out of the store for instance and her children were gone, yes, she would be in a state of panic. She would however, have some clue as to what might have happened. And no matter how bad she felt, she would take the next step. She would call the police of course. But this...tears now began to roll down her cheeks which were now a bright shade of red. It was all she could do to keep from full blast sobbing. Calm down Chevy, there has got to be a rational explanation for this, just calm down. Take a deep breath. She did. In with the fresh air. Hold. Out with the bad. One more time. In with the fresh air. Out with the bad. She felt for a second, that she actually did feel better. Her hands were still trembling, yes, but she no longer was on the verge of sobbing. Good. Now then, what is the next step? Cell phone. Yes. That’s it. She could call the police. And tell them what exactly? That she swerved to avoid vehicles that aren’t here? That her kids disappeared right in front of her? What would she say? She took the phone, still attached at her hip, off the clip and looked at it for a second and stared. Finally she used the sleeve of her flannel and wiped her cheeks dry. Ok. I’ll just say I was trying not to hit an animal and drove off the road. Maybe I'll get a ride into town. Yes that’s it, I can call J.C. J.C. was Chevy's best friend and co-worker. If the police wouldn't give her a lift, J.C. would take her home.

Her hand was trembling so bad she dropped the phone on the pavement trying to turn it on. She picked it up and put a death grip on it, trying to will her hand to be steady and her other hand to be good aim so she could dial the numbers. Just three, but she had never had such a hard time dialing a phone in her life. She got her thumb on the nine just fine and finally with full effort and concentration, one, one. She hit send with accuracy and quickly put the phone to her ear. Nothing. Not even a sound. She looked at the phone just to make sure she had hit send and yes, she had hit send but, she put the phone back up to her ear and sure enough, still, nothing.

This is ridiculous, she thought. She tapped the end button and pressed and held the number one, to speed dial her own home. Obviously, she didn’t expect anyone to answer as she didn’t figure the kids teleported back home. But she did expect to get the answering machine, which would serve two purposes: one it would prove that her cell phone was working accurately. And two, it would settle her nerves just a little even to hear her own voice along with that of her two children which were on the machine. It went something like: beep; this is Chevy, Lauren, and Bryan, we’re not home right now but leave a message and we’ll call you back as soon as possible. Everyone had said their own names and the last part they had said in unison, and if you listened long enough you could hear them all break out in giggles at the very end right before the beep. Sometimes she would call her own machine from work while the kids were in school just so she could hear their voices and that giggling at the very end. More