Always Watching

Chapter 1

Today is the day that I finally understand why Dad was right all along.  You see, today is the first time that Johnny is honestly lying to me.  Ah the dichotomies of my life – honest lies. Allow me to explain.  While I’m at home cooling my heels, playing the good wife while he goes out fighting crime wearing his cape, something has changed.  It’s not a good change either.

I’m out of the loop.  No, I don’t like the feeling one little bit.  So help me, if he tells me one more time that he can’t discuss an ongoing investigation with me… ME!  I may revert to my old ways. 

Scratch that.  I do love him.  What I don’t love is two months of nothing to do but bake and decorate the house, obsessively clean to the point that you could perform surgery in my kitchen. I dawdle around in a life with absolutely no purpose whatsoever.

Seriously.  I’m so bored that it’s affecting my health.  I threw up three times this week.  Ick.  I’d rather be shot than vomit.  Believe me, that’s no exaggeration.

So Johnny is in his closet packing his bags.  He says it’s business.  I feel like he’s leaving me.  You’ve heard of a work wife.  Well, I’m the work widow.  He won’t tell me why he has to go to Montgomery.  He won’t even tell me when he’s coming home.  He’s not sure. 

Do I look stupid to him?  Apparently so, because he expects me to tolerate this patronizing pat on the head like a good little lap dog and –

Helen?

What? I slammed my journal shut and glared at the shadow in the doorway between the anteroom to the master suite and my den.  Yes, the house is mine again.  I feel like having the locks changed and the remotes for the gate and garage reprogrammed the second he leaves for Montgomery.

It’s time for me to go.

I rolled my eyes.  Go then.  Never mind me.  Never mind that your vague timetable alone isn’t pissing me off.

I’ve already explained to Zack that I can fly home on a moment’s notice if the trial actually starts as anticipated.  For all Danny Datello’s talk about a speedy trial, his lawyer sure is proficient at filing motions for delaying the damned thing.

We both know why, I said.  "They’re digging up as much dirt on me as possible.  I think they’ve forgotten that I’m not the one standing accused of murder."

He muttered something under his breath.

What was that?

Nothing, sweetheart.  Do you want me to call you when I get to Montgomery?

My brain protested loudly: No, I want you to send Darnell.  You need to stay here with me. 

Instead of speaking my mind, my muscles shrugged, Do whatever you like.

He inched cautiously into the room.  You know I’m not happy about leaving.  I’m worried about you.  Do you feel sick this morning?

For God’s sake, do I look sick?

Ill-humored perhaps.  I’m sorry, Helen.  It’s my job.

I thought we agreed that I could be with you wherever you went.

You want to camp out in a hotel in Montgomery while I’m busy with …

You won’t even tell me what the case is – you haven’t talked to me about work since Shelly voided my contract with Downey Division two months ago.

I know, he oozed regret and an unhealthy amount of remorse.  Maybe I shouldn’t have been so tight lipped about work.  You said you were tired of chasing monsters.  How was I supposed to know if talking about the job wouldn’t make you as miserable as doing the job was?

I rose and wiggled my way into his arms.  Tell me what you’re doing now.  So I don’t worry every moment of every day.  I don’t like this, Johnny.  I feel completely excluded from your life.

"Joe doesn’t want me talking about this, not to anyone, Helen.  Believe me, I pled my case harder than ever on this one.  He insists that it’s simply too sensitive to risk having anyone outside the investigation aware of what we’re doing.  I trust you.  If it were up to me, you’d know every single detail."

This isn’t fair, I whispered.  We’re not supposed to have secrets anymore.

Remember what you said to Tony Briscoe when he wanted you to tell him the truth about Crevan’s sexuality?

I nodded.

Well, this isn’t my story to tell either, honey.  Trust me.  This trip is business.  Nothing more.  The fact that we can’t be together right now is a huge driving force behind wrapping it up and getting back here where I belong.

Promise me that this isn’t a poker tournament.

Not even stealing Joe’s money would be enough to lure me away from home, he said.  Cross my heart.

There’s a pretrial hearing later this morning.  I thought I might go sit in and see what happens.

Will one of the guys be with you?

It took all of five seconds for Devlin to accept Johnny’s offer to join OSI.  Crevan endured two weeks of Briscoe’s cold shoulder before calling it quits.  I nodded.  Devlin left me a message last night.  He’s gonna be there, since at the time, he was one of the primary investigators on the case.

So were you.

And Ned, I said softly.  But Devlin thought at least one of us should be there.  We wouldn’t want the defense thinking that just because none of us are part of Downey Division anymore that our commitment to Datello’s conviction has waned.

Johnny kissed me leisurely.  I’m gonna call you when I get to Montgomery.  And probably ten times on the way there.  Keep your cell phone on even if you’re in court?

Sure.

Don’t look so sad, baby.  It’s killing me.

I’ll probably lose ten pounds.

Don’t you dare stop eating, Helen.  I mean it.

I shrugged.  The mere thought of food made my stomach fist into a tight knot this week.  Was it anxiety because Johnny was leaving me?  Probably.  I haven’t completely regained my weight or physical strength since the shooting last October.  It had been nearly five long months since the injury to my left shoulder.  Damned limb was still weak as a kitten.

What does that mean?

I’ll try to eat.  Have you been so busy with work this week that you haven’t noticed my appetite tanked?

Johnny started to fumble through his breast pocket for the phone.  That’s it.  I’m calling Joe and telling him that I can’t leave you right now.  Chris will have to do this thing instead.

No, I rasped, stilled his hand.  You can’t do that.  It’s probably a touch of the flu, or nerves.  I promise I’ll eat even if I don’t feel like it.  You promise that you’ll call me so much I don’t realize you’re gone.

Deal, he murmured.  I love you.

I love you too, Johnny.

I watched his Crown Victoria disappear from the driveway and let the emptiness in the house drag me to a dark place.  Devlin’s call snapped me momentarily out of the funk.

The hearing is at ten.  Are you up and dressed?

Sadly, I am, I said.

Good.  I’m on my way over to pick you up.  When we’re done at the courthouse, we can have lunch.

Did Johnny call you already?

Some grins are audible.  Maybe he did.  Maybe he didn’t.  See you in twenty.

A mere thirteen minutes passed before the intercom at the gate buzzed.  I depressed the button.  Come on up, Dev.  I’m ready to go.

He waited in the car while I locked the door.

So what’s the purpose of today’s hearing? I asked.  I thought they hammered out all of the evidentiary stuff.

They’re asking for another delay.  Funny huh?  Datello was the one harping about his right to a speedy trial.  They’re the ones dragging their feet now.

No surprise there.  I hear that Celeste is due to deliver their first child any day now.  He’s probably hoping for some special dispensation that would let him be in the delivery room when the time comes.

Ain’t gonna happen, Dev said.  Everybody knows he’s a huge flight risk, Helen.  There are no judges for sale in Bay County.  I doubt they’ve ever been for sale in the district court.  He can watch it on one of those whatchamacallits.  Webcams.

I chuckled.  You think he couldn’t find a way to use that to his advantage?  Seriously, I’d be surprised if the judge goes along with many more delays.  This nonsense was supposed to be underway four weeks ago.

Don’t I know it.  The guy would be better off cutting a deal with Carpenter that gives him a shot at holding his grandkids instead of seeing them through Plexiglas if he lives that long.

Parole in 30 years, I said.  Datello comes from a long line of men who rolled the dice with the legal system.  They count on things like witness intimidation and jury tampering.  All it’ll take is one hold-out, and it’ll be a mistrial.  Maybe he’s counting on a new governor that’ll grant him a pardon.

That’s not funny, Devlin said.  Seriously, Helen, Datello laid a lot of groundwork to make sure that Collangelo doesn’t win a second term in office.  He’s gotta be counting on that now.

Even if that were to happen, it doesn’t preclude the feds coming after him with charges.  Let’s not forget who his uncle is, and that he’s probably itching to cut a deal himself.  No, if Datello has any sense at all, he’ll realize that he’s probably safer in a state penitentiary than he would be in federal prison where Uncle Sully can reach out a hell of a lot easier.

So you think he should take the deal Zack offered?

He’s not stupid.  Datello has to know that even if he beats these charges in Darkwater Bay, he’s living on borrowed time with Uncle Sully.  Cat’s out of the bag now.  Everybody knows he planned to betray the family.

Shit.  I don’t know what I’d do if I were in his shoes, Dev said.  Thank God I’m not.

I gnawed my lower lip for a moment.  So… I don’t suppose I can pry any details out of you about why Johnny needs to be in Montgomery for an indefinite period of time, can I?

As hard as this might be for you to accept, just because I work for OSI now doesn’t mean that I’m getting information at the same level Johnny is.  Truth be told, Chris isn’t quite sure what’s got Joe so agitated that he wants his number one guy in town.  I can only surmise that it’s serious.

That doesn’t make me feel any better, Devlin.

Sorry, he murmured.  I know this hasn’t been easy for you.  I wish I could do something to make it easier for you.

I shouldn’t have quit my job.  At least then, I had something to distract me from all of this blasted retirement.  I’m bored half out of my skull.

Have you considered consulting on cases again?  Crevan said you did that for awhile last year after that first case.

Working with Darkwater Bay in any capacity opens a can of worms I’d just as soon keep sealed.  It came to a point where before I could even question anybody that they were freaking out about liability and insurance issues.

Guess in the long run, those fears weren’t unfounded, Devlin said.  Since you got shot on the job.

I doubt I’d have gone off to confront suspects alone without a badge.  Anyway, it’s a moot point.  After the fuss Johnny made to get me out of that contract, there’s no way that Shelly Finkelstein would consider working with me again.  On top of that, the old crew that I loved collaborating with so much are all gone.  You and Crevan are at OSI.  Ned… well, for his sake, I hope heaven is real.  Nobody deserves it more than he did.

Devlin pulled into the parking building shared by Central Division and the district courthouse.  Almost show time.  You ready to hear what bogus excuses his attorney has to offer this time?

Pretty sad commentary on my life when listening to a lawyer whine about how his scumbag client deserves special treatment is the highlight of my day.  I can hardly wait to hear the latest sob story.

Dev opened his door.  Well, then let’s get inside and watch the show.

My first clue that something was wrong this time came when we opened the doors to the courtroom and discovered that it was standing room only.  A moment later, Zack’s worried expression flashed before my eyes.

Ah hell.  Now what?