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    Autobiography of a Love Shy Man: Preoccupations and Unresolved Issues in My Life with Women
    Autobiography of a Love Shy Man: Preoccupations and Unresolved Issues in My Life with Women
    Autobiography of a Love Shy Man: Preoccupations and Unresolved Issues in My Life with Women
    Ebook99 pages44 minutes

    Autobiography of a Love Shy Man: Preoccupations and Unresolved Issues in My Life with Women

    By Delvensoft

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    About this ebook

    In first part I dwelt with the issue in all its detail on how attraction to women developed and shaped. Issues pertaining to relating with women were recounted. Preoccupations before, during relating and after succeeding in having sex with the woman is reviewed. How impressions of certain women become erotic stimuli and the results of one’s initiative with woman and negative events were surveyed.

    In the second part one gave an account of related aspects in resolving the issue. One had critically appraised oneself on how attractive one is to women, one’s choice of women, and life situation of having no social access to women of one’s liking. One had examined oneself in courtship and romantic context and the kind of relationships one had sought in life. Finally my advice in resolving the issue to people in similar boat as I am in.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherDelvensoft
    Release dateSep 6, 2013
    ISBN9781301275229
    Autobiography of a Love Shy Man: Preoccupations and Unresolved Issues in My Life with Women

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      Book preview

      Autobiography of a Love Shy Man - Delvensoft

      Title page

      Autobiography of a Love Shy Man: Preoccupations and Unresolved Issues in My Life with Women

      By Delvensoft

      Copyright

      Copyright © 2013 Delvensoft

      Smashwords Edition

      License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      All Rights Reserved

      Table of Contents

      Title page

      Copyright

      Identifying the issue

      Relating with women

      After having sex with the woman

      The problem in nutshell

      LIFE REVIEW

      Erotic stimuli

      Results of Initiative

      Courtship Survey

      Negative experiences from woman

      Growing within a relationship

      Resolving the issue

      One’s choice of women

      Longings and reality

      No social access to women

      Seeing / talking

      The kind of relationship one sought

      Opportunities and how far one has tapped the opportunities

      PUA Experiences

      Phone close

      Common experience on emotional fulfillment in a relationship

      One’s own pattern

      Understanding the components involved

      Dysfunctional behavior

      Romantic

      Insights into self in courtship context

      Sex

      Love

      Relationship

      Resolving the issue

      Why it exists

      Seeing, Talking and Touching

      Introduction

      In retrospection, throughout my life one major theme persisted. This theme is women. I was always mystified by women. Their bodies, their hairstyles, the way they dress, the way they talk, the way they walk, the way they swing their arms during walking, their arms, their breasts, their buttock-movement, everything in relation to them was a puzzle. My eyes simply glued to their images, my mind preoccupied with their memories and so on. Since my early childhood till now the same preoccupation or interest persists. One wonders what is all this about.

      It all begun with watching women. In any place on earth and especially in large cities of the world, women abound in various colors, shapes, sizes etc. Somewhere I read about women watching and certain centers in certain cities are flooded with women feasting the eyes of women watchers.

      All these impressions were later recorded by me in the form of drawing and paintings. Later, wherever possible, through camera and photographs, and now mobile camera and mobile phone video are used to record.

      As an adolescent and throughout the teens and adulthood, one practiced masturbation as to process as well as an end product for all the impressions of women one had watched for the whole day.

      Later, the desire to make love or to relate or meet every woman one gets attracted to, on sexual level was developed. For this purpose, one first came into contact with the esoteric and magic for seducing women. But since these are superstitious and unscientific one studied applied psychology and later came in contact with PUA material.

      Whatever one does or does not with the woman or with myself and my activities the passion always stayed with me till now.

      Perhaps the ability to experience the totality and thrill of sex were reduced with age and experience. The first and fresh sexual experience is always supreme to all other following ones. Probably the degree of thrill directly related to the degree of importance the being ascribes to the sexual experience. There are quite many factors that work behind the thrill.

      As one is more and more experienced about the world the aspirations changed. From love, intimacy, courtship, sex, etc. one is focused on money, wealth and status, perhaps, later on power. The previous aspirations are for the childhood. For example, as a child, one had strongly desired for toys with mechanical keying. But now one does not desire for them. It is previous and past stage of being. So also with sex and intimacy. When this stage takes the toll one can’t have the initial thrill and importance to sexual experience.

      A sage had rightly said before the sex drops from you, you drop it. Sooner or later sexual vigor will be reduced with advanced age. If a person fails to drop sex from his brain, it becomes cerebral as body cannot work it out.

      PART I

      Identifying the issue

      Development of attraction for women

      As a child one is attracted to mature women, school-teachers, moms of friends, elderly ladies and so on. Women in movement, like carrying a water pot, or a bag and walking briskly from the market, women doing their everyday domestic chores like sweeping the floor, washing clothes, etc. when bent cleavage exposed, or other exposed parts of their body were the classical erotic impressions in one’s life. Since one was born in southern part of India, one found sari-clad women to be more attractive and erotic. Later this attraction was extended to other kinds of dressing as well.

      Contributory factors to this kind of preoccupation, emotional and behavioral pattern include no regular mate whether through marriage or otherwise coupled with high libido, inadequate social skills, coupled with no social opportunities in a large city like Hyderabad where women of particular form and figure abound. When compared whether similar preoccupation exists in others whose life was normal with timely marriage and settlement, it was found that such idiosyncrasy is unique to oneself only. Then one had no marriage or no regular provision of sex in life for long. This again was due to long-time unemployment. This in turn resulted in regular practice of masturbation for which daily impressions of women were needed.

      Shaping of penchant: Fixation with particular form and figure

      Form and figure also were shaped through time. Particular form of women was found very stirring and most attractive. Such form was more to be found in urbanized middle class localities. Other forms of women different or not fitting to this particular form were ignored and one prefers to remain indifferent and unrelating. The concept is further complicated by qualifying attraction into aesthetic attraction and erotic or sexual attraction. Obviously all attraction is not erotic. However, there is no definite boundary between the two. One can move into the other any time.

      Relating with women

      The problem is of two types. First kind is before relating with the woman and the second kind is afterwards. After having

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