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Cold Front (Pindone Files #1)
Cold Front (Pindone Files #1)
Cold Front (Pindone Files #1)
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Cold Front (Pindone Files #1)

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Dek tops. Ren bottoms. Neither gives an inch. Kinky, tough, troubled, caring. Cops and lovers, fighting crime and, sometimes, each other, in a vast cold land where the criminals read minds and the cops never know what they'll face next. First half of the "Pindone Files". Contains "One Brief Encounter", "A House is not a Home" and "Cold Front".

LanguageEnglish
Release dateMar 5, 2010
ISBN9781452305165
Cold Front (Pindone Files #1)
Author

Ann Somerville

Ann Somerville is white, Australian, heterosexual, cisgendered. She/her.

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    Cold Front (Pindone Files #1) - Ann Somerville

    One Brief Encounter

    Dek

    In summer, Vizinken is one of the most beautiful cities on the planet. So I hear, anyway. Every Minismonth, the rollos heave with eager, pudgy tourists making their way cross-country to enjoy the delights of the Pindoni capital. The inns charge three hundred percent premiums to house their grain-fed butts, and national viewskims broadcast concerts, displays of ethnic culture and floral contests to entice the rest of the country to squeeze into the mountains and take the air. Everyone wants to go to Vizinken in summer.

    No one in their right mind goes near the place in winter.

    Which is why they hold senior officer block training in the coldest months of the year, when the travel’s cheap and the inns are desperate for customers, and snow and ice whips down the mountain passes and through the stone laid streets of this old city like the fury of old Marra himself.

    Everything closes down in Vizinken in deep winter. Government and business takes place behind hermetically sealed doors in heated buildings, but if you’re not a politician or a trader, there’s precious little to do. The crime rate goes way down in winter too—another reason for holding the training now. The local Force doesn’t have much to keep itself busy here this time of year, unless someone takes it into their head to try and assassinate the President. It’s different in Tsikeni. Port cities never close, and the sea doesn’t freeze over in our part of the world. Crime rate’s a little lower but not so you’d notice, out on the streets.

    But the bars and the smoke joints never shut anywhere in Pindone, no matter what the season, though their customers don’t spill out onto the street now like they do in the warmer weather. You get fewer fights, fewer knife injuries in the winter—people are more inclined to sit hunched over a hot mug of spiked khevai, enjoying the warmth inside and out, than to get drunk out of their skulls on sweet, cold jada and reach for illegal shivs to avenge imaginary offences. Winter’s the only time of year I can ever really relax in a bar. The rest of the time, I’m always on duty, even if only in my head, watching for trouble. Doesn’t stop me going to them, though.

    Most of the Defence officers on the course prefer to socialise with our own, and there’s something to be said for making friends with the capital’s squads, and getting to know people from the regions. But it’s a long course, and I’ve never been one for glad-handing for the hell of it. I take the time I need to grease the social wheels and do my bit for interregional relations, and the rest of it, I spend on my own, going back to the haunts I’ve discovered in previous visits up here.

    Last time I found a bar tucked away in the rougher end of the city, squeezed between a money broker on the left, and a brothel on the right. The Children of Marra don’t seem to spend a lot of time trying to reform society down here, but that’s no surprise. Most of them are just middle-class aspirationalists, wanting a nice, respectable existence in the light of their God now, and a cosy, pious afterlife in his Presence later on. The Land of Marra doesn’t have room for prostitutes or moneylenders, but then it doesn’t have a lot of room for anyone. The Children live by a narrow set of rules to fit into a narrow vision of the life hereafter. The fact they wouldn’t come to this part of town for anything less than a gold-plated ticket to the Land, only adds to its appeal.

    I call my boys, speak to my brother, tell him the gossip that’s fit to pass on to Janil, and then head out. It’s shitting cold, too cold and dry for snow, and dangerous with all the ice. No veecles for hire around the hotel—I guess they figure all the sensible folk are going to stay in, and they don’t want to carry the other kind. I walk a block, and find one lonely operator who’s willing to take me. When we get there, I give him a healthy tip, and wonder how I’ll get back. I ended up walking it last time—it’s not the kind of area a veecle will come on a booking. I decide to worry about that later. Right now, I want a nice quiet drink in a nice quiet bar.

    Downmarket and sleazy the area might be, but Parolkiz insists on a wrist scan as a proper establishment should before I can walk in. That was one of the things I liked about it from the start—despite the surroundings, it doesn’t give off any air of underlying criminality, and inside, it’s just a respectable, local boozer. The fug is thick but not unpleasant, and warm, welcoming, after the bitterness of the wind outside. I get a few odd looks, being a stranger, but no one says anything, and the bartender’s as pleasant and friendly as I remember him.

    You were here a while back, he says.

    I’m amazed he remembers. Yeah, last year. Don’t get many newcomers?

    Don’t get many defs in at all. Not as customers, he adds dryly.

    I’m not wearing visible ID, and I’m not in uniform, so either he checked the log as I scanned in, or my haircut’s being obvious again. Janil was teasing me about it before I left Tsikeni, and it’s not softened much in a month.

    He takes my order. Temlido—strong and clean, made in the area, a Pindone speciality. My usual indulgence, though it’s not a cheap tipple. Something to sit on while I think about life and wind down from the work we’d done today. It’d been lectures, desk-bound stuff, the kind of thing that gives me a headache. I’d popped a painkiller earlier, but I still hadn’t reclaimed my headspace properly. That’s what I’d come here for.

    I like the way the bar’s laid out, in booths. A lot of the bars back home are all tables, people brushing up against you the whole time moving back and forth for drinks, and they’re noisy. The booths here are padded, acoustically dampening, and the music’s kept low. There’s a kami board, but no one’s throwing, and there aren’t any electronic games machines at all, which is pretty unusual these days. It’s quiet, even though there must be twenty people in the room. No raised voices. Nothing to listen over the top of. From a def’s point of view, it’s as easy to monitor and dismiss as a grain field.

    But habit’s a hard rogan to kill, so I sit with my back to the bar, leaning against it and nursing my drink, as I casually check out who’s here. It’s a mostly male clientele—another thing that appeals to me. The two women I can see look like lovers, and not looking for company. A few crusty old men, sitting over hot drinks and nodding at each other—probably been drinking here most of their lives. I can only see one man who’s close to my age, and he’s with someone who has to be his Da, the resemblance is that strong. And....

    I sit up. Now he wasn’t here last year. Definitely would have remembered him. I look around—he’s on his own, sitting at a booth right at the back of the room, only the one glass on the table, and he doesn’t have the expectant air of a man about to leave or meet someone here.

    No one would ever accuse me of being impulsive. I’ve got a near perfect disciplinary record, and while the job brings plenty of danger, I don’t go looking for it. Got family, got responsibilities, too much to risk being stupid over. So I’m slightly surprised to find myself on my feet, heading over to the booth. A sensible person would stop and turn around, go back, order another drink, and forget about this idea.

    Sometimes I get damn sick of being sensible.

    He looks up as I loom over his table. Close to, he’s even more extraordinary—hair the colour of polished copper, the green, slanted eyes of a karkon, and he’s huge, like one of those monumental figures they’ve got in the antiquities museum in Darsino. Even sitting, he looks near as tall as me.

    Are you waiting for someone? I blurt out.

    He gives me a lazy smile, lifts his glass in salute. Not any more. Take a seat.

    I do so, then hold out my hand. Dekan. Dek.

    He offers his—broad, long fingered. Finely made for all his size. Ren. He shakes my hand with the assured, firm grip I expect, but then sees my glance at the tattoo. Yeah, I’m a spook. Is that a problem?

    He’s watching me, assessing my reaction with more than those astonishing eyes. My brother’s a PK, so no. Force?

    Forensics. You’re street?

    Yeah. Don’t want to give more information than that, not to a stranger even if he’s Force too. You local?

    Mostly. You’re not.

    No. I’m here on block training. Boring as hell.

    He grins and shakes his head, and his collar-length hair shifts and shines in the low light. Never seen hair like it, not that colour, for sure. I miss out on that mostly. I’m the one doing the training when it happens. Which means he must be a lot more senior or qualified than his youthful looks indicate—or he’s some kind of prodigy. He’s not Collared, so he probably isn’t in the Elite, but I can’t assume he’s not. What would you have done if I’d said I was waiting for someone?

    Offered them money to go away?

    He laughs, a genuinely happy sound, relaxed, confident. I feel the tension I’ve been carrying most of the day, just slip away from me. Some EPs do that for people, I know—side effect of their talent—but it’s more than that with this guy. There’s no...competitiveness here. No fear of the unknown male, no instinctive raising of the testosterone hackles—like he knows who he is, what he is, and nothing anyone else can do would ever threaten him. With the size of him, I don’t think many would try—not and get away with it.

    Want another beer?

    He nods, and I signal at the bartender, who brings over fresh drinks for both of us. I authorise the spend, and make sure Ren can see the screen. When the bartender leaves, Ren smiles wryly. Didn’t think I’d believe you were what you said you were?

    Just...proving my bona fides. And why the hell had I bothered? This isn’t one of the Tsikeni clubs. Habit, again.

    No need, he says, tapping his temple.

    Ah. Of course. I look at his hand again. That’s an unusual mark. Custom?

    Yeah. They don’t get many spooks with two talents. Had to come up with something special for me. He grimaces as if it’s brought back unhappy memories. I’m a TK too.

    I do a double take. Isn’t that supposed to be impossible?

    No. Just rare. Incredibly rare. He lifts his glass again. I’m one of a kind, he says over the rim, then takes a sip.

    I make sure I look him over slow and admiringly, let him see me doing it. You really are, I say in a low voice, and his lips curve invitingly. So, Ren, what does a nice respectable def do for fun in Vizinken in the middle of winter?

    I don’t know—you’ll have to ask a nice respectable def. I grin. So does he. Nice teeth. Nice lips. Cheekbones of a god—I wonder if he’s surgically enhanced, but somehow, I doubt it. I write. Paint a bit. Work takes up more time than it should. And sometimes I hang around in bars looking for rough sex with handsome strangers.

    My mouth goes dry in a nanosecond, and I cover my utter lack of anything intelligent to say by sipping from my glass and hoping like hell my hand won’t shake. Like taking risks, do you?

    Not much of a risk, he says, tapping his temple again.

    Maybe I just want to talk to you.

    He lifts a sceptical eyebrow. Yeah, and maybe I’m Marra’s left testicle. He shrugs. But talking’s fine. Just saying...I wouldn’t say no.

    In all my thirty-one years, no one’s ever made me an offer this brazen or this irresistible, and my cock’s already pressing tight and insistent against my leathers. I try not to sound hopelessly lust-soaked. That’s a pretty powerful little talent you’ve got.

    Two points higher and I’d be wearing a Collar. I take it that’s a ‘no’.

    That’s a ‘I can’t believe the most beautiful man I’ve seen in ten years just offered me rough sex in a bar’. He smiles, relaxed again. How rough? The clubs have taught me that not asking now caused a shitload of problems later.

    He doesn’t mind, doesn’t seem to think I’m being stupidly cautious. I like a fight. I like being controlled, and I’ve got a high pain threshold. Anything you get, you earn. No means no. Anything short of that is fine.

    So I find out your limits when you tell me ‘no’?

    You find out when I stop calling you ‘sir’, Dek. I don’t mind just talking, honest. It was just an idea.

    He sips his drink again, watching me, seeing how I’ll respond. I want him—I want what he’s offering. But I only just met him. You really came somewhere like this, hoping to meet someone to get off with?

    He shakes his head, smiling ruefully. No, of course not. I came here for a quiet drink, same as you. You just happened to be here. You’re good-looking, horny and you’re not giving out anything that makes me think you’re a nutcase, so I figured, why not ask? I know you’re not offended, and I won’t be if you turn me down.

    I could sit here all night and stare into those eyes, but I’ve got a better idea. I throw back my drink, enjoying the burn as the temlido goes down, then set the glass down decisively on the table. Got a place to go?

    He smiles like I’ve just given him a sack of gemstones. Not mine—too far. There’s a hotel close, and I can give you a lift after. Mind riding a two-wheel in this weather?

    So long as it’s not far. These aren’t winter riding leathers. I hadn’t thought I’d need them on this trip.

    It’s not far, and we can warm up later. The promise in his eyes makes my whole body thrum with raw need. I’ve rarely wanted anything as much as I want him, and if I was being sensible, I’d stop this before it goes any further.

    I hate being sensible all the time.

    He puts his glass down and then stands up. And up.

    He must be a midec and a half taller than me, and I’m one of the tallest people in our station house. "Hope they gave your Mam a lot of time off after she had you," I joke, but I’m dry-mouthed again. Marra’s balls, he’s a god on two legs.

    Actually, I was on the small side. I made up for it later. He lets me look him over again—he’s used to admiration, and not embarrassed by it. But not arrogant with it either—it’s just a fact, like his talent. I can either like it or fuck off. I like it. Ready?

    "You safe to drive?’

    He gives me a pitying look. One beer in a guy my size? I may as well be drinking milk. Come on.

    But before we go through the door, he puts his wrist on the scanner, and makes it obvious that he wants me to check him out. Twenty-eight, single, Force officer, clean medical, clean criminal record. Talent status—essential, level two.

    I nod. Thanks.

    Returning the favour, that’s all. He’s keeping it anonymous too, but he knows same as me, this isn’t the safest thing for two civilians, let alone two defs, to do. But if I wanted safe, I’d be back in my hotel room, tucked up in bed with a mug of moshino, nodding off to sleep.

    I don’t want safe. I want this guy so much it hurts. I’m not used to feeling like this, and it’s been a very long time since I wanted anything much at all. That’s scary in its own way, but I’ve made my choice. Time to follow through.

    Down a side alley, to a lock up shed the bar owns, he says. Heated, of course, which is good or we’d be here all night waiting for the engine to warm up. He walks over to a Tetwin SuperRider—the biggest goddamn two-wheel I’ve seen outside a dealer’s window, and it’s polished to mirror perfection. You like your ride, huh? I say, stroking the satiny metal of the fuel tank. I see he’s added oxygen boosters. I suspect he likes to drive faster than is legal. But then, so do I. Sometimes.

    I like being ridden better. I snort, amused at the sly joke. Yeah. You don’t?

    Oh yes. I don’t feel like talking about my own custom built two-wheel back in Tsikeni, because I’ve got better things to do with my time and besides, sometimes it hurts a man to admit his is smaller. Spare helmet?

    Give me a sec....

    We’re alone, so I decide to risk it. I put my hand on his shoulder, pull him around, hard, get in his face even though it means standing on my toes. "I said ‘spare helmet’, soldier."

    He snaps to attention. Yes, sir. Coming up. He’s hard muscle and suppressed strength under my hand, and I want him even more now I’ve heard him call me ‘sir’.

    I pat his shoulder, and get my lust back under control. Good boy.

    He bends to open the pannier. I stroke his arse like I just stroked his two-wheel, and damn if it’s not as firm and unyielding under the leathers as the metal tank had been. He pushes back a little against my hand, but he doesn’t say anything as he pulls out his helmet and the spare, as well as a long coat.

    He comes to attention again. Are these acceptable, sir?

    Help me with the coat, soldier.

    Getting his hands on me at last, even through four layers of weatherproofing and in a dingy shed, is even more arousing than I thought it would be. He keeps eye contact the whole time, his movements precise, controlled, measured. I want to see him lose that control. I want to know what he looks like when he comes.

    If we don’t get to that hotel soon, this could be embarrassing.

    He zips up the coat and waits for my order, but there’s a challenge in his eyes that tells me this isn’t the real deal. I haven’t earned his submission yet—he’s just warming me up. "Satisfactory, sir?"

    You talk too much, soldier. Let’s move.

    Even the shitting cold and the bite of the wind through the borrowed coat and inadequate gloves doesn’t dampen down my need in the least, and he must be able to sense how much I want him. I’m jammed up hard against that perfect arse, my arms around him. The vibration of the Tetwin’s enormous engine is running up my legs and my body, rubbing my erection against my trousers unbearably. All that, and knowing this man would be under my hands in just a few minutes, means I’m having to exercise more self-control than frankly I thought I was capable of.

    Ren’s concentrating on driving us safely through the empty, icy streets, and I can’t tell what he’s feeling. EPs have an unfair advantage that way, which is why so many people dislike them. I wonder if he’ll use his talent to get off on my arousal. Thinking about that ratchets things up even tighter.

    I haven’t been this hard since I was eighteen—it’s almost painful. When he pulls up in the hotel garage a demidec from the bar, and climbs off the two-wheel, I can’t hide the fact it’s a little awkward moving around.

    Let me help you there, sir, he says with a straight face, offering me his arm like I’m infirm.

    You can do that inside, I snap, knocking his hand away. Cheeky bastard. He strips me of the coat and helmet with a mock-respectful air, but his eyes are bright with amusement. He thinks this is funny. I suppose it is.

    The concierge doesn’t blink at two guys turning up at this hour with no bags and wanting a room for the night—but then they see just about everything in Vizinken, so the local defs have told me more than once. We’re wearing clothes, we’re not high, and our scans are clean—that’s all they expect. Ren pays. I don’t argue.

    We’re only up one flight. I follow him up the stairs and into the room, shut the door quietly behind me, and before he can say anything, I grab him and slam him hard against the wall. His muscles bunch up, but he doesn’t protest as I pin him.

    You’re going to pay for that, soldier.

    Yeah? He tries to get out from under my hands—I shove him back hard enough to hurt, and his eyes go wide-pupilled. Lust, not anger. I’ve judged it right—he said he likes a fight, and this is what he wants.

    He struggles some more, and I have to use a genuine restraint hold, forcing his arm behind him. It might be for play, but if he was serious, I’d be in trouble. Behave, soldier, I growl. You’ve already earned yourself ten stripes.

    He pushes again, but I’ve got him immobile for now. Ten’s nothing.

    Don’t dare me, boy, I say in the low, menacing tone I use on our nastiest suspects.

    He goes still. What do you want me to do, sir?

    I want you to shut up, and get naked. Show me what you’ve got. You speak if I ask a question, or you want me to stop, Ren. I slip quickly out of role so he knows this is real. Otherwise, keep your goddamned smart mouth shut. I’m going to tan that arse good, and maybe, if I think you deserve it, fuck you into the ground. That acceptable, soldier?

    Yes, sir. Thank you, sir.

    I let him go and step back. The room’s basic—clean, but no frills—but there’s an armchair near the writing desk. I sit in that, legs spread, coat open. Letting him see what he might be getting. Strip, I order, keeping my voice hard, cold. Waste of time with an empath, of course.

    He’s good. Very, very good, and done it before, no doubt about it. He knows he’s special, and knows the effect he has on people. On me. As each layer comes off unhurriedly, as his long legs shift, the muscles playing under the tight leather of his trousers, he sends me a casual glance. Asking if I like what I see. Knowing perfectly well that I do. My body registers my definite appreciation of the show, however much I’m trying to hide it in my expression.

    Bare skin. Milky pale, which goes with that incredible colouring. The hair’s real—up top and down below match perfectly—and no one has a body that toned and perfect without working at it. Though he’s not exactly slender—he’s just too big for that—the long legs, the tight belly, say runner to me. Sports, not gym work, I think. I bet the sod never puts any weight on.

    Not a shred of self-consciousness as he sheds his trousers and his erection springs free. Penis—big, like the rest of him, but not grotesquely. Just a nice, thick cock that makes me want to howl at the moon with lust. I remind myself I’m supposed to be the big, bad scary officer here so drooling would be out of role, but Marra’s balls, he’s gorgeous.

    When he’s not wearing anything but the tattoo, he comes to attention again. Fold the clothes, boy. Five stripes. I don’t like sloppiness.

    No, sir. I’m sorry, sir.

    Two stripes for talking out of turn. I didn’t ask you a question, soldier.

    I’ve surprised him, which is nice. He’s so confident, it’s good I can catch him off guard. He wants to play this game, he should know I take it damn seriously. He should try being on my team. The ones that wouldn’t die under a gun for me, hate my goddamn guts. But they still do what I tell them.

    He gives me a nice eyeful of that beautiful, beautiful arse as he picks up the clothes and folds them with meticulous precision, putting them on the little dresser. Bend over, grab your ankles, boy. Spread your legs wide. I want to see what I’m getting.

    Deliberately humiliating, and not something I’d stand for myself, but his erection gets a little harder, and he...relaxes. Eases. Slipping into subspace. I’ve seen it before but never quite so obviously noticed when the switch happened as with Ren. Before, he was playing. Now, he’s into it.

    Good. I’m still fully dressed, even down to my gloves, and though I would dearly like to take my trousers off and give my poor cock some relief, I can use this to my advantage. I rub against him, letting the zips and buckles scratch his bare skin, the leather and wool catch and burn a little. I bring my knee up his inside leg like I’m going to aim for his balls—he tenses, but doesn’t move. Good. Pretty well trained, but the Force does that for most of us.

    I put my gloved hands on his arse, cupping those spectacular buttocks, kneading, pushing, spreading. The stitching’s coarse—they’re outdoor gloves, nothing fancy—and I know it scratches as I run a finger down his crack, push at his tight little hole. He goes tense again, but then relaxes. He wants me to keep going, but someone this perfect deserves a hell of a lot more than a finger fuck. Still, I poke around some more, teasing, making him twitch and quiver. Weigh his heavy balls in my hand, regretting the gloves then because I want to know what they feel like, skin against skin.

    He’s breathing hard now, but so am I, and unless we get to something more than feeling up soon, I’m not going to last. Stand up, turn around, and kneel, soldier, I growl. Move it!

    For such a big guy, he moves with the grace of a classical dancer. He drops to his knees like a temple attendant, and looks up at me.

    You need me to tell you what to do, boy? Three stripes for being an idiot.

    His eyes narrow then, and he almost says something—I’ve pissed him off. But he doesn’t say it, so I don’t comment. Instead, he rests his face on my groin, and I have to bite my lip so I don’t moan.

    You praying, boy, or looking for the instruction label?

    No, sir. I’m appreciating.

    I stifle a snort of laughter. Just get on with it.

    To be honest, I’m not sure what ‘it’ is supposed to be—I’m hoping he’s got an imagination, and he doesn’t disappoint. He rubs his face some more against my trapped erection, then mouths it through the leather, licks it. All the time he keeps his hands folded demurely at the small of his back. I don’t know what I want more—watch him submit, watch the way his tongue slips in and out between his sculpted lips, or to tell him to use his hands, and make me come. Submission wins—just—but I can’t handle much more of this without making a damn fool of myself. I shove him back.

    Enough. Come to attention, soldier.

    He gets to his feet, hands still held respectfully behind him. He’s flushed now, hard as me, and close too. Glad to know I’m not the only one on the edge. Hands behind your head, and wait.

    He obeys immediately, stares straight ahead. I stroke my hand down his belly approvingly, even though there’s the small matter of twenty stripes to deliver before either one of us comes.

    The little bathroom has all the necessities, basic but more than adequate. I’m back in moments—he’s not moved, still staring straight ahead, but the slightly glazed look in his eyes means I’d better get on it. I strip my gloves and jacket off, throw them carelessly onto a chair, then pick up his own belt.

    Grab your ankles again, boy—I’m going to tan you good.

    He’s almost indecently eager, and there’s no coyness about the way he spreads himself again for me. I let him wait a moment or two—I want to check the belt’s in good shape, supple enough and no cracks. It’s fine grade—expensive. Vanity that seems out of character for our Ren. Maybe it was a gift. Maybe it’s been used on his lovely backside before and he wants the best. All I know is that I need to see this guy losing control, and I need to be the one to make him lose it.

    Count them off, boy. And it’s going to hurt. Is that what you want, soldier? Tell me!

    Sir, yes, sir!

    I bring the belt down on the last ‘sir’, hard, and he jerks. Count them!

    One!

    Never been flogged, but I’ve seen it down in basic training. We had a drill master who was a nastier sadist than I’d ever dream of being, and he had a technique in delivering stripes that made the biggest, toughest, most stoic offenders break down and cry like babies. It was simple—all he had to do was wait just a little longer after each strike than the victim was expecting, and deliver it unpredictably. It was nearly as painful to watch as to receive. It’s also amazingly effective on subs.

    After five, Ren starts to tense before each strike—it’ll make it hurt a hell of a lot more, and I don’t want to do that, not the first time, no matter how high his pain threshold. I put my hand on his neck, squeeze and push down.

    Relax, soldier, I say quietly. I’m not going to injure you. He nods minutely, though it takes a moment or two before he unclenches.

    I don’t relent, other than that, but he doesn’t make a sound, even though his arse is red and I’m not sparing him in the least. When he gasps out Twenty!, I fold the belt in two and stroke it gently between his buttocks, using my other hand to soothe, rubbing carefully.

    Good, soldier. Bravely done. He’s breathing like a hard-worked farm barchin. I keep rubbing, murmuring, until he’s got himself a bit more under control, then I bury my hand in that beautiful hair and pull his head back cruelly hard, making him look up at me. Going to fuck you now. All right, boy?

    Yes, sir, he gasps, swallowing painfully.

    I let him go, but only to push him forward onto the bed. As he kneels down in front of it, I grab his hands, and pull them behind him, lashing the belt around them quickly, and pulling it tight enough to feel like real restraint.

    And even though I need to be buried balls deep inside him, I take a few moments to step back and just look at him—rosy arse, powerful legs, long back taut and bunched under my makeshift bonds. Still gulping down air. Still submitting. Still shitting gorgeous.

    I don’t bother undressing—I just undo my trousers and finally give my erection some room to move. I put the condom on, slick myself and my hand, then I step forward, reach under him. He gasps as my hand finds his cock and I stroke him hard—uncomfortable for him being forced against the bed, but he doesn’t complain. Seems to like it a lot, in fact.

    Face me, Ren. He twists so I can see his flushed skin, one slanted dark-pupilled eye, lips parted as he pants. I kiss his cheek. Thanks, I whisper, and he smiles.

    But we’re not done, and I’m still holding his cock in a tight, possessive grip. Now, with the other, I prepare him, taking my time, playing with him, stretching, until he’s humping the bed a little reflexively. No point in telling him off when I’m just as desperate, and when I know he’s ready, I give him no warning—just get behind him, and shove slowly in.

    He sighs, a long exhale of ecstasy, and I close my eyes briefly in pure pleasure. It’s been a few weeks for me, and years since I’d been this ready for sex. This is the closest I get to praying these days, and if I worshipped old Marra the way I want to worship this tight, beautiful man, I’d get into the Land with a free pass. Slowly I thrust, holding back the urgency with more willpower than I’ve ever shown in my life. I want this to be special, I want to remember this. I want Ren to remember this.

    I keep stroking him, pushing him into my hand with each thrust. He humps into my grip, and every so often just squeezes around my cock, making my vision white out—I don’t know whether to belt him or bless him. His fingers curl and uncurl spasmodically, and he’s making these erotic little gasps that make a nonsense of my control.

    I adjust a little. He cries out as I hit the sweet spot, and he comes hot and hard over my hand. The room suddenly smells ripe, thick with sex. A few seconds later and I come, lost to all but the stretched wire tension in my balls and my belly, the pressure behind my eyes, the rushing in my ears, as I shudder and spill.

    I have to put a hand on the middle of his back to support myself—my legs are jelly. A few seconds more to blink and come back into reality. Marra’s balls, I say softly.

    Dek, I can’t breathe.

    What? Oh. I’m pushing him into the mattress. I let go, bend and kiss his back in apology, then undo the belt one-handed. Sorry.

    I’m not. There’s a smile in his voice, and one on his face. Can I get up now?

    Of course.

    I help him back onto his knees. He looks tired but happy, and when I kiss his cheek, he grips the back of my head and turns me, so he can kiss me on the lips instead. His mouth tastes like beer, warm, sexy. Thank you.

    "You’re going to have such a sore arse tomorrow."

    Yeah. Isn’t that great? he says, grinning. Guess he really does have a high pain threshold.

    I fetch a damp cloth from the bathroom—he hasn’t moved when I get back. He’s worn out, so I clean up, lingering appreciatively over his flat, hard belly.

    And I can’t even see yours, he complains. I only remember then that I’m still dressed, with my cock hanging out of my trousers, looking rather undignified.

    I toss the cloth back towards the bathroom door—close enough. Got enough energy to undress me?

    Sure...if you’re planning to stay the night.

    Leaving right after sex always strikes me as the most unclassy thing a man can do, and besides, if I want a lift, he’d have to get dressed. Nah. Unless you want me to leave.

    He slings an arm around my waist, lays his head against my stomach. No. He looks up, mischief in his green, uncanny eyes. Besides, you might suffer from top drop. It wouldn’t be nice to let you go through that on your own.

    I snort—like I need protecting. But he’s the first sub I’ve ever topped who’s given a damn about that, and though he’s mocking me a little, the offer’s serious. It’s nice. So’s lying next to an undemanding adult who knows what he wants and isn’t after more than I’ve already given him. One of the many reasons I prefer men is that I get to avoid those uncomfortable questions about my fertility and what I plan to do with it. Too many times I’d been forced to explain to a bed partner that I already have three boys, and I donate regularly to the sperm bank. I’ve no desire to be a father to a child when my only connection to its mother is a casual fuck. I’d rather avoid the casual fucks too, but that’s all I allow myself these days.

    Ren’s almost too willing to respect my unspoken boundaries. He asks nothing about me—where I come from, my name, my background. Him, I could find in the records in three minutes’ searching. A Force officer with two talents? He’s probably headline news over in Elite. But me? He knows nothing, other than my age and that I’m a def. My boys, my parents, my rank—sure, he could find out if he grabs the records from the bar and asks for high-level information, but he’d have to work to get those. But he’s not asking, and I’m not offering. I’m just surprised that I even want to. It’s been a while since I came close to even thinking about it.

    All he wants is to cuddle, kiss some more, drift off into well-deserved sleep. I’m content to wrap my arms around him and relish the feel of him. I try not to get wistful about it, or what it brings back to me. In six years, I’ve pretty much learned to hive off my memories from my present, and not play the destructive game of comparing my life now with my life then. But it’s been a long time since I felt this good about sleeping with someone.

    He’s an early riser, so am I, and since I’ve got to get back to the hotel, shower, change and be down for the course group’s breakfast, we don’t linger. He makes a bit of a thing about straightening my scarf, like he wishes he could ask me to hang around. When do you go back? he asks.

    Tomorrow. I, uh, could....

    But he’s already regretful, shaking his head. I’m off to Weibde for a week—they’ve had a spate of sex attacks and they’re bringing a team in to see if they can do anything with the evidence.

    Ah. Well, they drag me up here every year.

    He smiles, though not with the same happy relaxation of the night before. Next year, then. He kisses me on the side of the mouth. It was fun. And my arse is happy.

    Your arse is going to sting like hell for days.

    Yeah. That’s what I mean.

    You’re a very strange man, Ren.

    He waves the hand with the tattoo at me. Hey, I’m a spook—that’s a given. The pain gets me out of my head for a bit, Dek. You don’t know what means to an empath.

    No, I don’t, but I’m glad. I take his hand, squeeze it. Next year.

    We’ve got a date.

    ~~~~~~~~

    The temptation to locate and contact him is strong, and only gets stronger over the next few weeks, but I resist because it’s undignified and an abuse of my position, not to mention completely against regulations. Besides, I don’t think I can face knowing that he’s had second thoughts and decided he didn’t want to see me again.

    I learn pretty quickly that trying to bury the memory of that one night in fucking other people just makes it worse, so I give up on that, even if it puts a few noses out of joint. Some of my partners have got used to me being available when they call up for a night’s fun, and they’re not pleased to have me turn them down. Some of my friends from the clubs wonder if I’m tired of the scene. I tell them I just need a break.

    It annoys me that one night with a stranger could have unsettled me that much. It’s the kind of weak-willed behaviour I most despise in other people. But nothing I do can drive thoughts of Ren out of my head, and all I can do is hope I get it out of my system when I see him again in the coming winter. That I might not find him again, doesn’t really occur to me. There’s always a way of finding someone in Pindone, if you’re on the Force.

    That confidence just begs fate to come kick me in the head, and it does. A month before I’m due to head off on the annual training, my team and another from the neighbouring station are sent in to break up a particularly vicious prostitution and smuggling ring. It’s an operation we’ve been planning for months, and all precautions are taken, but somehow the perps are tipped off, and instead of hightailing it like good little criminals, they decide a bit of revenge is in order. My men and I end up walking into a warehouse rigged with Gemten, radio-triggered to go off when we’re all inside.

    I don’t remember that kind of detail. When I wake up in hospital, that’s what they tell me happened. Five officers killed, ten badly injured, me among them. The senior tego who led the operation, also died—they never do find all his body parts. It’s a bad, sad time, and my recovery takes longer than it should because being injured, losing my people, triggers the depression I’d fought off six years earlier. In the end, the bombs do what willpower couldn’t, and take my mind right off Ren and that night we had. The doctors put me on long leave, and I fly across to Darsino to be with my boys and my brother.

    I’m in Kekwe with them for four months, and I let them put me back together again, the way they had the first time. Leaving’s hard. The boys don’t want me to go. My sister-in-law, Janil, is worried about me. You shouldn’t be alone, love. You could get a job with Civil Defence here, you know.

    Tikome answers before I can, because he knows the situation as well as I do. Janil, Dekan would have to start from scratch here, he says. He’s too old to start as a grunt again.

    I hasten to reassure her, because well-meaning though she is, I need things to stay as they are, however empty my life feels at times. And I’ll be fine, honest. I feel fit, and I want to get back to work. It’s spring again—you know that always lifts my mood.

    Janil’s sceptical, but my brother’s right—I can’t start again from scratch. I nearly lost everything seven years ago, and rebuilding’s been agonising. I don’t want to leave my sons but I made a decision about what was best for them back then, and disrupting them and dragging them back to Pindone, taking them away from the home they’re used to—in Meram’s case, the only home he knows—just because I get lonely sometimes, would be deeply unfair. No, I had set things up this way because it was the best for them and still is. I’m recovered. It’s time to get back to work.

    The station’s a different place. Sadder, for one. New faces replacing lost comrades, a constant reminder of a fatal screw up and even if it wasn’t my screw up, I can’t help feeling responsible. My boss, Tego Kraz, is fighting to hold things together, and is very glad to have me back on board, though he still wants to assure himself that I’m really ready for work. Once he’s done that, he throws me back into it.

    There’s plenty to do—the fallout from that operation is still taking up a lot of time, and crime is always a growth industry in Tsikeni. I start falling back into bad habits, arriving early, leaving late, telling myself that I need to put the hours in.

    One night, after nine, Kraz comes in to make an urgent report, finds me there and takes me aside. He tells me to knock it off. You don’t think one mental breakdown was bad enough, Parg Dekan?

    Yes, sir. It’s just....

    Go home, son, he says kindly. Call your boys. Watch a dramasim. The work can wait. I don’t want to see you or anyone else crack up over it.

    This is one of the many reasons I’d die under the gun for Kraz. He cares. He’s also right. But there’s still a lot of work to be done.

    More, in the end, than all of us pushing ourselves to the limit can handle, and finally the head station agrees to more recruitment, and a reorganisation of the senior officer structures. I’m to be assigned a partner, and the teams will be smaller. In a way, it’ll feel like being demoted, less responsibility, but I can see how it might make us more flexible and responsive. Kraz is for it, so am I. But the Force is a monolithic organisation which takes forever to change. Plans go up and down the chain of command, and every time I see them cross my desk, they’ve altered again. I can see it being next year before anything happens.

    As autumn arrives, the weather suddenly gets cold, and I have to put a thick scarf on for the first time this year before I mount my two-wheel, I wonder if Ren realises that the reason I didn’t see him last year was nothing to do with him—or even me. I figure I probably missed my chance there, but it’s just a drop of regret against so much else. I care—but against the deaths of six good men, I can hardly call it a tragedy.

    As I head this morning over to my desk, a clerk waylays me. Sir, the tego wants you to go to his office as soon as you arrive.

    Fine. I’d love to get some khevai first, but I don’t like to keep people waiting, and certainly not Kraz.

    I knock, and am told to enter. My boss is talking to someone, who stands up.

    And up.

    I stop dead, frozen with shock. Ren?

    Kraz is talking. Ah, Dekan, thanks for coming in. I’d like you to meet Parg Rensire. He’s thinking of transferring from Vizinken and I thought he might make a good addition to our team. Rensire hon Parmin den Vizinken, let me introduce Dekan hon Cerimwe den Tsikeni. He’s one of the senior pargs at this station.

    The formalities of the introduction

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