New New Testament Gospel of Matthew

New New Testament

Gospel of Matthew

King Namor Version

Steve Howard

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PUBLISHED BY:

Steve Howard on Smashwords

New New Testament

Gospel of Matthew

Copyright © 2010 by Steve Howard 773U5

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission by the copyright owner and the publisher of this book, except in the case of quotations embodied in critical articles, essays and reviews.

This is a work of fiction and any resemblance to persons, living or dead, or business establishments, events or locales are the author’s imagination and are used fictitiously. The use or misuse of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

This work is based on and holds true to one of the most talked about characters of all time. Jesus Christ. The story remains the same as the original. It is brought to a more modern language to make the ideas clearer. There is always room for interpretation in all writing. The Bible is not an exception. It is a fairy tale that borrows from older fairy tales. All rights are reserved.

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Table of Content

matthew chapter 01

matthew chapter 02

matthew chapter 03

matthew chapter 04

matthew chapter 05

matthew chapter 06

matthew chapter 07

matthew chapter 08

matthew chapter 09

matthew chapter 10

matthew chapter 11

matthew chapter 12

matthew chapter 13

matthew chapter 14

matthew chapter 15

matthew chapter 16

matthew chapter 17

matthew chapter 18

matthew chapter 19

matthew chapter 20

matthew chapter 21

matthew chapter 22

matthew chapter 23

matthew chapter 24

matthew chapter 25

matthew chapter 26

matthew chapter 27

matthew chapter 28

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Gospel of MATTHEW

matthew chapter 01

Vs. 1: This is the list of the ancestors of Jesus Christ, a descendant of David, EQ.

There are those who believe this is a relevant or significant event to have David as an ancestor. David was famous for ‘killing ten’s of thousands’ including King Saul and his family.

And David was a descendant of Abraham. And we talked about him in the Holy Bloody Torah. As we did the other mad murdering monkeys Ab begat. And again we must remember that Isaac was a bastard son of a Lord.

We go on with other names that don’t matter but we are reminded that the idiot Solomon, the King of excess and a harem of a thousand women, was the son of ‘the woman who had been Uriah’s wife’. And for those who missed what that story was about: that was the beautiful woman David had seen bathing in the moonlight one night. He wanted to have her but she was his best friend’s wife. So he killed his best friend to take her as booty.

No, he didn’t. He simply sent him off to the front lines to die in battle.

The point is: David, like most of those we hold in high esteem because we are taught to by the religious authorities, was a murdering prick that was raised in the temple by priests to be a murdering prick.

And then we get the list of the men who descended from other men after the exile in Babylon all the way down to Jesus. Fourteen generations. They would have us believe. Or have us killed.

Vs. 16 … Joseph, who married Mary, the mother of Jesus, who was called the Messiah." EQ.

Now, as is often the case in Jewish families of the bible, Jesus was a bastard child. So not a direct link to David. Which need not matter to us but is a significant part of the story.

What we have is a classic euphemism that is believed and seldom questioned by billions of ignorant sheep.

Vs. 18: This was how the birth of Jesus Christ took place. His mother Mary was engaged to Joseph, but before they were married, she found out that she was going to have a baby by the Holy Spirit. EQ.

Holy Spirit is a euphemism. Later we will have it referred to as ‘the Lord came onto her’. The Lord may have been King Herod. There is evidence for this farther into the story and it need not be believed for now. What needs to be understood is that if Mary didn’t have sex, she was raped.

Now this may seem crazy for anyone wanting to live in a fairytale forever and hold virginity for a symbol of innocence.

Joseph was inclined to dump Mary when he found her to be pregnant before he had had sex with her. He was asked not to disown her. And this is also not new. It is a rerun of the Torah. And if you have done your homework and read the Torah, you will understand that Mary was raped by a Lord. For rape was, and still is, a habit of those who find themselves in a position to engage freely in such practice.

Vs. 23: A virgin will become pregnant and have a son, and he will be called Immanuel. EQ.

A virgin will lose her virginity before marriage quite possibly not of her own free will.

Vs. 24: So when Joseph woke up, he married Mary, as the angel of the Lord had told him to do. 25. But he had no sexual relations with her before she gave birth to her son. And Joseph named him Jesus. EQ.

When he woke up. Joseph certainly had sex with her after that for Jesus had brothers and sisters.

matthew chapter 02

Vs. 1: Jesus was born in the town of Bethlehem in Judea, during the time when Herod was king. EQ.

In Roman occupied land. Under King Herod.

Now the Good News Bible has given us the translation: vs. 1: … men who studied the stars came from the east to Jerusalem. EQ.

What that would mean is: astrologers. Not likely astronomers but let us not dismiss astrology too quickly even though it is not an exact science; it was a beginning of trying to understand how the heavens mattered. And we are very much still at the beginning of our long quest of comprehending the nature of the universe we are in.

Other translations call them ‘three wise men’. And this very likely has everything to do with ‘the three kings’. And these are three stars that point toward the eastern sky. Christianity, though soon to rage vengeance against the practice of astrology, was very much influence by its predecessors of star and planet gazers in its many years of creation. The story is very similar to other stories before it.

But let’s take it as the story goes. And these wise men went to the Roman King Herod and asked, vs. 2: