Son of Interior Design for Idiots, The Shopper's Guide
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About this ebook
Mark McCauley is the Dave Barry of interior design.
Chicago Tribune
Beneath the humor beats the heart of a true artist, poet and philosopher.
WF Magazine
McCauley discusses interior design for those with dogs, children and in-laws, he's the Anti-Martha Stewart.
Boston Globe
Mark McCauley is the interior designer for the rest of us.
San Francisco Chronicle
Mark McCauley, ASID
Mark McCauley, ASID Author of Five Books on Interior Design, former nationally syndicated columnist (30 million newspapers coast-to-coast) and on-line columnist (150,000 clicks and up) for HGTV.com, Scripps Publishing (1998-2006). Press "Mark McCauley is the Dave Barry of interior design." Chicago Tribune "Beneath the humor beats the heart of a true artist, poet and philosopher." WF Magazine "McCauley discusses interior design for those with dogs, children and in-laws, he's the Anti-Martha Stewart." Boston Globe "Mark McCauley is the interior designer for the rest of us." San Francisco Chronicle Mark McCauley, ASID author of: INTERIOR DESIGN FOR IDIOTS LET'S TALK DECORATING! COLOR THERAPY AT HOME COLOR YOUR HOME BEAUTIFUL DECARTIA! Mr. McCauley has also written for AOL.com and the Chicago Tribune, participated in National Book Tours, spoken in public from coast-to-coast, made numerous national and local television and radio appearances and appeared on National Public Radio. Over one million people have toured Mr. McCauley's Show Houses. Mr. McCauley has been an Invited Guest Speaker, High Point Semi-Annual Furniture Market on several occasions. Affiliations: IL State Registered Professional Member ASID Education: St. Ignatius College Preparatory DePauw University
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Son of Interior Design for Idiots, The Shopper's Guide - Mark McCauley, ASID
Son of Interior Design for Idiots, The Shoppers Guide
By Mark McCauley, ASID
Smashwords Edition Copyright 2011 by Mark McCauley, ASID
All images courtesy of –freedigitalphotos.net
Smashwords Edition, License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Mark McCauley, ASID
Author of Five Books on Interior Design, former nationally syndicated columnist, and former on-line columnist for HGTV.com, Scripps Publishing (1998-2006). Illinois State Registered Interior Designer and Professional Member of the American Society of Interior Designers.
PRESS
Mark McCauley is the Dave Barry of interior design.
Chicago Tribune
Beneath the humor beats the heart of a true artist, poet and philosopher.
WF Magazine
McCauley discusses interior design for those with dogs, children and in-laws, he's the Anti-Martha Stewart.
Boston Globe
Mark McCauley is the interior designer for the rest of us.
San Francisco Chronicle
Mr. McCauley can be reached at colortherapy@aol.com
INTRODUCTION
I’m no expert. But I know where the experts are. They are the retailers, salespeople and interior designers that work in your town. They are the manufacturers, manufacturer’s representatives, customer service people, plant personnel, master carvers, upholsterers and truck drivers that build and design the stuff of dreams.
–freedigitalphotos.net
Master Carver
They are the people who worry if the fit is right on your drapes, who take extra time to explain why a particular window treatment is better for your family’s needs, who listen and work with you to ensure that you get the proper carpeting.
These are the people who decorate your life.
I’m proud to say I know them.
Mark McCauley, ASID
INDEX
CHAPTER ONE The Interior Designervention
CHAPTER TWO The Zen Buying Guide
CHAPTER THREE The Furniture Shopper’s Survival Guide
CHAPTER FOUR Exactly How Does One Make Furniture?
CHAPTER FIVE Wooden It Be Nice?
CHAPTER SIX CARPET BOMBING
CHAPTER SEVEN The Drapes of Wrath
CHAPTER EIGHT THE Hardware Man Cometh
CHAPTER NINE THE DRAPER'S DICTIONARY
CHAPTER TEN THE FABRICLAND GLOSSARY
CHAPTER ONE The Interior Designervention
"Look at them! Go ahead, look at them! Know why they’re laughin’? Your Facebook page has pictures of your family room on it, THAT’S why they’re laughing…"
–freedigitalphotos.net
We need to talk.
I’m somewhat loathe to bring the subject up, but….
It’s not you. You’re a wonderful person. Really. It’s just that, y’know, your living room. And that family room. And well, for what it’s worth, pretty much EVERYTHING!
It’s about your interiors. They’re just not working out. I’m sorry. We all took a vote and I was elected to tell you…
It’s not that we don’t like lava lamps. We’ve always been fond of your ‘Dog’s Playing Poker’ painting. No one has a better collection of Elvis Miniatures. Your cinder block end tables are nice too. It’s just that, well, all of these things in combination are a little hard to take. I’m sorry, I wish it didn’t have to be this way but you need: AN INTERIOR DESIGNERVENTION
Listen, I’ve made a few calls and collected some material here for you to go over. Sort of a test. It’s actually a fifteen question STRESS TEST,
to see if the reason your interior design isn’t quite right is caused by some bizarre chemical imbalance or if possibly something from your past is bothering you.