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    Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette: What is Wrong with You People
    Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette: What is Wrong with You People
    Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette: What is Wrong with You People
    Ebook80 pages58 minutes

    Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette: What is Wrong with You People

    By Isabel Spellman and Lisa Lutz

    3.5/5

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    About this ebook

    Ever wonder what Isabel thinks about such topics as: eating, email, dating, weddings, driving, umbrellas (and more)?

    Her behavioral manifesto: Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette: What Is Wrong with You People will answer these and other common etiquette questions.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherSimon & Schuster
    Release dateMay 28, 2013
    ISBN9781476741413
    Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette: What is Wrong with You People

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    Reviews for Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette

    3.5/5

    17 ratings2 reviews

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    • 4/5
      I laughed a lot. Funny and informative.
    • 3/5
      Kind of a slap-dash effort.

    Book preview

    Isabel Spellman's Guide to Etiquette - Isabel Spellman

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    title

    In memory of Grammy Spellman

    CONTENTS

    Foreword by David Spellman

    WHAT IS ETIQUETTE?

    EATING

    EATING OUT

    IS CHIVALRY DEAD, AND SHOULD IT BE?

    MODERN DATING

    HOSTESSING

    WEDDINGS

    BABY SHOWERS

    DRIVING ETIQUETTE

    AIRPLANE ETIQUETTE

    TELEPHONE ETIQUETTE

    E-MAIL

    HOW TO APOLOGIZE

    UMBRELLAS

    BATHROOM ETIQUETTE

    ORGAN DONATION

    ORGAN DONATION

    The Last Word Excerpt

    FOREWORD

    When Isabel first asked me to write the foreword to her booklet on etiquette, I said no, because when I think of manners or decorum or the proper way to behave, the last person who comes to mind is my sister.

    But then she began to present her argument, explaining to me how often etiquette—not in the old-fashioned use of the word, or even in the modern sense of good manners, but simply the nuts and bolts of how one should behave—is on her mind. It makes sense that a person who grew up behaving in a way that no one would consider good form might eventually become mildly interested in manners as a general topic—and might even come to think of herself as something of a reformer on the subject.

    Still, I was unconvinced.

    Then Isabel began writing her behavioral manifesto. While I don’t agree with or condone everything in it, she certainly has a clear worldview. Also, when Isabel says things like, If you don’t think I know what good manners are, I’ll show you what bad manners are, she means it.¹

    That’s all I’m going to say.

    As with any self-help or how-to book, I suggest reading this with a grain of salt. Pick and choose the advice and suggestions that work for you. If anything sounds or feels wrong, don’t do it. Trust your gut. It’s probably right.

    Look, this is my sister. I love her no matter what. You don’t have to feel the same way.

    David Spellman

    1.  No one was threatened, bribed, blackmailed, or harassed in the writing of this foreword.

    WHAT IS ETIQUETTE?

    I don’t know. If you asked me this question ten, twenty years ago, that would have been my answer. Actually, my answer probably would have included a few four-letter words and the suggestion that you stick your etiquette someplace impolite. All etiquette was to me was the name of a book by Emily Post that my Grammy Spellman made me read after several unpleasant interactions. Etiquette the book and etiquette in action were both forms of punishment, as far as I was concerned. Etiquette was a flock of ridiculous women in Chanel suits, waiting for men to stand and hold out chairs and open doors so they could eat lunch with tiny forks and drink unspiked tea and write each other thank-you notes all afternoon while men got to do all the fun stuff, like go to bars and fall off bar stools.

    Etiquette was the thing that separated women from men and made girl stuff way less fun. I always associated etiquette with the time before the women’s movement. Weren’t outmoded manners one of the things we were fighting against?

    But once the trauma of my adolescent schooling in manners wore off and I found myself time and again victim to some form of thoughtless behavior—not paying for the second round; roving Christmas carolers; leaving the toilet seat up (this isn’t a gender fight, it’s a sanitary one); not paying back gambling debts; reckless umbrella usage; uninvited hugs;¹ parents selling Girl Scout cookies for their daughters (so uncool); door-to-door religious salesmen—I thought that maybe, for once in my life, I was in a position to school other people on what was right and wrong with the nuts and bolts of human decency.

    What you have here is by no means exhaustive. It is brief, touching on a handful of subjects about the world we live in and ways in which we should navigate it, peacefully and decently. Some subjects will seem like old hat to you, but maybe not to your next-door neighbor. Some subjects you might think ill-suited for a book with the word etiquette in the title. But what is the definition of etiquette?

    Actually, I still don’t really know, so I consulted an online dictionary.

    Etiquette

    et·i·quette

    The customary code of polite behavior in society or among members of a particular profession or group.

    This makes the

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