11 Heart's Pain

Flight of the Armada

Book 11: Heart’s Pain

By

Jay Michael Jones

Copyright 2014 by Jay Michael Jones

Smashwords Edition

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Table of Contents

Chapter 113: A Ten at One-Five

Chapter 114: Heart’s Pain

Chapter 115: Temper

Chapter 116: Lest We Forget

Chapter 117: Civil Docket

Chapter 118: Cigar Break

Chapter 119: Absolute Truth

Chapter 120: Welcome to Krypton

Chapter 121: Palatin Porteau

Chapter 122: Form Follows Function

Chapter 123: The Magic Ring

Timeline

Excerpt from Book 12

Other Books in the Series

Chapter 113: A Ten at One-Five

Sara Garin took the bolt of blue silk cloth Carrol gave her and handed it over to Keetah Hashone for Athena’s One-Five dress, to be worn at her milestone fifteenth birthday party. Keetah was relieved to see the material: access to the traditional glossy white fabric of a Thuringi One-Five dress was hard to come by, and she had none in her tailor’s stockroom. That fabric was made from the fibers of a particular plant on the Insa and required a great deal of fiber to weave the cloth and achieve its shimmering, color-changing effect. It would have been embarrassing but necessary to turn down a request for such from the family of the storied Colonel Glendon Garin. Since Sara specifically asked for the dress to be made from the silk, Keetah could breathe easier. Others might not have been gracious about the fiber shortage and would have pressed for their daughter to have the traditional material somehow, or at the very least borrow a dress and alter it to fit. This might have been objected to by the original owner, and Keetah had been through enough dress squabbles. Thank the God of All for reasonable parents like Glendon and Sara Garin!

The One-Five celebration was only one event in the busy young Athena’s life. In addition to school at the poddock and consue training and performing common tasks as required, Athena also had to secretly learn Chassiren lessons as well: the art of conversation and companionship as well as social and table manners. What Sara gracefully referred to as ‘courtesy’ in the bedroom would be explained when Athena was ‘enlightened.’ These were topics the Chassiren women could not discuss with the rest of the Thuringi population, who had no idea two members of the mysterious, shape-altering race lived among the ships of the Armada.

The Chassiren girl gradually quieted down as she aged, leaving her impetuous childhood behind in favor of a more disciplined young womanhood. She told her father it was because of all the things she had to do.

There is only so much a girl can hold in one hand, Father, Athena sighed one evening.

The family sat in their abbreviated living room, since a wall and a door partitioned part of it off to give Athena a private room of her own. She had completed her school lessons for the day and now practiced pouring tea for him. All the furniture was borrowed from various Garin relatives since Glendon’s had been destroyed during the Great Attack. It was generous of their relatives and Athena was keenly aware she needed to take care not to damage the borrowed items.

Glendon did not see anything wrong with the way Athena did the task, but Sara was very specific about what was correct. There was a certain way to hold the teapot handle, a certain curve that had to be naturally achieved in the hand which involved the arm and on up into the shoulder. There was a specific way to sit and to mind the teacup with the other hand, all the while keeping her focus on her gentleman. Athena could master each element easily enough, but putting them all together was not as easy as presumed.

You are only holding a teapot and a cup, Glendon pointed out.

I do not mean literally. I mean, all these different lessons are difficult to handle. It’s a wonder that I am not trying to write with the tea or duel with the pot.

Well, I’m afraid it’s all because we are here with the Armada. If you remained on Earth, likely each day would be dedicated to a different school of training, instead of having to crowd it all into every day.

It’s not that I mind the work, of course, Athena assured him, careful to maintain the arch while attempting to keep eye contact with her father. She ended up missing the cup altogether, and poured the tea on the table. Oh, bother it all! Athena shrieked.

No no no, Sara laughed softly, calmly picking up a cloth and sopping up the spilled liquid with it. If you do such a thing, simply smile and apologize prettily. Don’t bring anger or frustration to the table. Your caller seeks rest and calm, and deserves charm and grace.

Then he’d best call on someone else, Athena sighed as she put the cup and pot down on the table. I doubt I’ll ever achieve that level.

Glendon did not like to see her so strained. Come here, family princess, he invited, so Athena sat on her father’s lap. He lightly scratched her back and she curled over in delighted response. It’s been a long day; why don’t you go to bed now and get a good rest.

But she needs to perfect her technique, Sara protested mildly.

There will be other days to perfect pouring tea, my love, Glendon told her. Look at our little one; she is tired. Athena turned to the side and leaned against her father, curling her legs up into his lap.

You are the best father in the whole fleet; in the whole of everything, Athena told him.

Ah, are you saying that because I am, or because I am releasing you from further tea pouring this evening? Glendon chuckled. Athena kissed his cheek.

No, Old Thing, you really are, she assured him.

Old Thing! You have been chatting with Atlanta Ardenne on the com, haven’t you?

Yes. Is that not the correct address for one’s patron? It is what she calls Lord Searl.

Not really, but as a fond pet name it has its charm, I suppose, especially to a doting grandfather like Searl.

Father, who may I invite to my One-Five party?

Anyone you wish. Why, who did you have in mind?

I would especially like to invite Uncle Argo.

Uncle Argo! Why? Glendon blurted out, before laughing at himself. Athena laughed also. I mean, why ‘especially’ him?

Because I do not believe he gets out much and he is my great-uncle; also because he is a handsome man for an old gentleman; and just because I like him. I wish we could have Uncle Brent here as well so he could see that I am not the terror I once was.

Until we get the transportal from Earth, I doubt Uncle Brent can make the trip. But if you want to invite Uncle Argo, you certainly may do so.

Thank you, Father, Athena said happily, and gave him another kiss on the cheek with a hug. She bounded off his lap and gave the same measure of affection to her mother. She went to her little room and closed the door.

My lord, you are the very reason outside men do not raise Chassiren children, Sara said as she put away the tea set. You are far too easy on her.

But Sara, she is tired after giving her every ounce to everything she does. I’ve watched her, she never holds back. She throws herself into everything until she is spent at the end of the day. Glendon rose from his chair, and Sara embraced her husband. They went into their bedroom.

I am not saying you are wrong, she purred. But I have noticed that you make certain she attends consue and not worry so about Chassiren lessons.

She’ll be twenty in only five years, Glendon said with concern as they prepared for bed. Isn’t there enough time to train her in that fashion after she becomes a Chassiren?

She must learn her gentle and social arts first. She will not be ‘trained’ in the way you are worried, until her Two-Oh.

And just how will that be accomplished? Glendon asked.

On Chassiren it is accomplished by one of our men, who carefully teach the art of love to the entrant. I will have to explain topics and then hope to find an ideal… physical instructor, Sara explained.

Yeep!

Sara bit back the smile that always came to her face when Glendon made that noise. It was the exclamation of a proper Thuringi in the face of the natural order of Chassiren life. A Chassiren should never show amusement at another’s discomfort, she reminded herself, but he is so adorable when he is flustered!

Athena found her way to Argo Garin’s apartment after her school and consue lessons were done the next day. She never visited the family Elder by herself before but she knew from listening to conversations around her that the Garin clan was still not pleased with Glendon’s surprise marriage. Athena hoped she could somehow make amends to the clan; not realizing what a youngster wanted did not always produce the desired results. She was used to dealing with the more understanding and permissive scouts on Earth, her loving and somewhat indulgent parents, and accommodating schoolmates. It was not until she rang the bell that she was seized with second thoughts. She knew nothing about why the Garins were so displeased and had no verbal ammunition with which to combat an unknown ill. Before she could leave, the door opened and Argo Garin stood before her.

Argo had been an Elder for over a century and was highly respected among the Thuringi people. He was a tall, broad-chested man with long sleek silver-streaked locks plaited into a single braid in the back and the same lean face all Garins possessed. It was easy to see from which side of the family Glendon obtained his renowned good looks.

Argo was struck by the child’s beauty immediately and his tongue was lax as a result. He always privately thought his grandnephew Glendon was a good looking-lad and secretly proud of the lad’s many accomplishments. He had occasion to visit with Glendon and Sara in the years since the women’s arrival to the fleet, but he was not used to being in direct company with Athena lately. She was stunning. Glendon would have his hands full warding away her future suitors, perhaps more than his first daughter Echo. Even in her baggy consue outfit, Athena had curves that defied an unattractive suit, and the combination of Glendon and Sara’s looks made the Elder Garin almost blush with shame at his speculation.

Hello Uncle Argo, Athena said in her oddly shaded voice. It was at once girlishly sweet and maturely throaty. I am Athena.

He cleared his throat. Yes, I know that.

"I am having my One-Five in six days on Observation Deck One on the Daven Bau. I do hope you will attend. I would be honored if my storied grand-uncle favored me with such a consideration."

Why thank you, child. I shall be there, Argo agreed.

Oh, how pleasant! Athena declared as she clapped her hands in delight. Uncle Brent told me he will send a treat for the party, and he promised it will be wonderful!

Just watching her face light up in a smile brought a responding smile to the face of the dignified Elder. And what gift would you like for your One-Five, Athena?

Oh, I don’t want anything. I only want the presence of my loved family and dear friends. I am here to be with my father and to join my kindred in flight. Things are not important to me. I only want to be loved. Her honesty, so bare and poignant, touched Argo deeply.

Then I imagine you shall have your wish, he told her. She reached out and squeezed his hand gently before dashing off down the hall. He watched her as she hurried away, leaning out the door a little to do so. Suddenly he snapped back upright and closed the door. He chided himself. Being a widower did not excuse his watching a pretty girl in retreat. He was far too old for such nonsense and the child was his great-grand-niece, for the love of All! Be proper, Argo, he told himself.

The role of a dignified Garin Elder was an uncomfortable harness. He could not pursue a companion the way anyone from another family clan might. Propriety and honor seldom allowed for a widowed Garin Elder to publicly acknowledge certain needs, even though they existed as surely as anyone else’s. Besides, there were no women of whom Argo Garin was particularly fond; at least, not fond enough to call upon. He had been happily married for three centuries to his tasteful and passionate wife Ebba, and no one else interested him since.

He knew that in the old days, dignified Elders of other clans were not above slipping away for a discreet visit to the Chassiren world, but these were not the old days and he was a Garin. He chuckled to himself, imagining the kind of uproar that would result if he were to climb into a ship and declare, I’m going to Chassiren for I am a lonely man in need of a little what-what as Brent Ardenne might have put it. Brent Ardenne might have very well done that very thing, for he was a brash young man and unconcerned with the opinion of others.

I may as well have Hartin Medina remove my troublesome appendage for all the good it does me, Argo thought as he polished his boots. There are no sweet loving women my age who possess the kind of dignity the Garin clan expect, or wield the kind of wild mindless passion I would like to explore.

The day of Athena’s One-Five came at last. Berryl Medina helped prepare Observation Deck One after her common duty was done. Sara and Glendon came as soon as they could get away from their tasks. Brent’s gift arrived through the small transportal. His written instructions dictated the crate be quickly wheeled into place without opening it yet. Once the guests arrived, Athena opened the crate and clapped her hands in excitement.

Dozens of cherry gelatin squares sat on platters atop dry ice, ready to be served. Athena placed the squares on little plates brought from the dining hall earlier and passed them out to her guests. She looked beautiful in her blue silk One-Five gown with its high collar and form-fitting bodice and flowing skirt. Glendon could not keep the proud smile from his face. He did not care if his expression annoyed his Garin kin. Only Argo did not seem to mind. He walked over to Glendon and said casually, She is a credit, Glendon.

Thank you, Uncle Argo. Glendon did not let the surprise he felt enter into his voice.

You will need to monitor these young lads, Argo said when he noticed the number of classmates in attendance, all falling over their own boots over Athena. She will only blossom with time, and then you will have suitors with which to deal.

She is doing well in consue, and I have a strong lock on the door, Glendon replied. Argo smiled at Glendon’s calm response.

There were additional items from the transportal. Echo sent several pair of blue jeans and different colored turtleneck sweaters, and Carrol sent a white tea-length dress with a scoop neckline, made of a soft cottony fabric. Sara assured her that she could wear it at some occasion, but perhaps not this one. There was one more box, and Athena tore into it eagerly. I was told there were to be no gifts, Argo remarked to Glendon. Had I known, I would have brought something.

Well, there wasn’t supposed to be any, but Echo was apparently not about to let her sister’s One-Five pass without a gift. I suppose Carrol couldn’t resist, either. Argo was quietly surprised at the way his grand-nephew said Carrol rather than Princess Carrol or Her Highness. Perhaps Glendon was used to having a close friendly relationship with the royal family from his many years of service with them, but such familiarity struck Argo as unusual.

Oh! It’s marvelous! Athena exclaimed. She lifted an intricately patterned silver necklace with a teardrop-shaped diamond in its center. She held it up for Glendon to place around her neck and fasten the clasp. She read the card included with it. ‘One-Five, your turn. Roar’! She giggled. It’s from Merlin!

Who is Merlin? asked Denham Garin, Glendon’s father.

Merlin is my friend; Auntie Carrol’s boy, Athena replied excitedly without consideration for what she said.

Whose boy? Denham asked in a dreadful voice, but when Athena turned to him with her smile he could not retain his dismay.

Auntie Carrol and Uncle Gareth, she chirped happily, and suddenly covered her mouth. Oh, it was supposed to be a grand surprise, she exclaimed. But Grandfather, he is such a fun fellow! He and I used to race Uncle Brent’s goats in our goat carts. You’ll like him.

Hmm, was all Denham could manage.

Since the story was out in the open, Glendon went ahead and explained to their guests the tale of Merlin Duncan’s birth. He also told of Carrol’s steadfast belief that Gareth was alive despite everyone’s doubts and of Sandan’s repeated but denied proposals for the sake of propriety.

Why did you not offer? Denham demanded.

If she was going to turn down a noble man such as Sandan, I saw no point in adding to the mix, Glendon replied. She was certain of Gareth’s survival and when we discovered it was true, everyone was glad there was nothing to stand in their way. Then when they reunited – well; Sara, tell them. You were there.

It was so romantic, such a perfect scene, Sara told their guests in her breathless way. "There he was so thin and pale, climbing out of the Reprobate like a man battling his way out at a dark journey’s end. She was so steadfast in her love and belief in his survival! He gathered her up in his arms and they sank to their knees together, so weak with relief and happiness they were. And when he saw his son, Lord Gareth’s unexpected and surprising progeny, why it was as if a grand circle had been completed! We all wept with joy. Their love is so strong, and their struggles so full of despair and uncertainty. To see them reunited was utter contentment. Even the Garins were caught up in the story told in the gentle, passionate tones of the Chassiren. For two people to be so devoted to one another that fear of death and distance cannot sway them; why, surely the God of All married their hearts long before the alignment of the stars tore them apart. Now that their miraculous reunion has brought them together again, who can dare say it all was not directed by God’s will?"

There was no argument to be heard. Glendon whispered to Athena to be cautious not to say anything more, and certainly not to mention the Phillipi children. Our Garin kindred will be up in arms over the whole situation, and we need to let Stuart tell the tale.

Why didn’t you tell us this when you first returned? Glendon’s mother Elen asked, annoyed that he would have not divulged such an important tale to them.

It was by royal request that I not, Glendon replied. I am loyal to the crown, as are we all, and I shall not divulge a tale that is not mine to tell. It was a simple statement that the Garins could not refute. The party continued, the partygoers torn between being absolutely scandalized and buoyed by the wonderful tale of the love of Sword and Fist and Her Nibs, and Son of Fist.

Atlanta Ardenne and Terran Hellick stood off by themselves to enjoy the taste of the cherry gelatin treat.

I wonder where Father got this, Atlanta marveled. It’s tasty and smooth.

Watch this, Terran instructed, and held up his saucer and moved it from side to side. The bit of gelatin on the plate wriggled like a fish on a hook. She made her gelatin jiggle, and soon everyone watched the colorful treat wiggle on their plates and laughed about it. If it was not so sweet, I should enjoy more of this!

Anything larger than this square will have me reeling about like a rowdy Respite regular, Atlanta agreed. Whew! I certainly did not inherit Father’s ability to hold my sugar.

Lady Melina Medina tugged mightily on the last bundle of linens to pull it through the doorway of the Appala’s lift. It was not too heavy for her; Melina was a strong woman despite her slight appearance, and she handled other bundles heavier than this. But this time her hands were so dry this oversized bundle slid from her grasp rather than be coaxed along to the laundry room.

A helper seemed to appear from out of nowhere, and the bundle slid along easily out of the lift. Captain Shea Corrin of the Naradi handled it easily. She told Melina to open the laundry door, and she pulled the bundle inside herself.

Oh my dear, that is my task, Melina protested all along the way as she fluttered her hands uselessly in the air. Really, this is kind but so unfair for you.

It’s all right, Shea said pleasantly. I don’t mind helping out a bit. She went on her way, after making certain Melina had the other bundles under control. Shea Corrin admired people like Lady Medina, people in admirable physical proportion who moved with sure grace. Shea considered herself too tall even for a Thuringi woman, with legs too long for her body. Other than that, no task seemed too small or too great for Shea and she proved able to do whatever was required. It was a point of pride for her and she looked forward to the day when there might be another Festival. She might as well compete in the games since few men actually liked to have her out-wrestle them for nothing.

Athena’s consue training proved very difficult for her classmates. She had a marvelous time channeling her Chassiren energy into combat just as she did in games of trip-your-brother with Merlin on Earth. The stylized consue version was simply more of the same. Her swordsmanship improved by leaps and bounds. The consue instructors requested new wooden swords for practice, so Stuart shipped Earthian hardwood planks and downed one of the island’s larger Dorea trees for the woodcarvers. They turned out some spectacular practice swords. Athena’s sword bore tiny marks on it, marking her triumphs over classmates.

Her male classmates did not mind their occasional losses to Athena’s sword as long as they could make a play for her affection. Athena was gracious enough not to tease them or embarrass them, but she was not interested in encouraging them. She knew her time at girlish fun would come to a close upon her twentieth year, as would her opportunity to learn consue fighting and playing. Her Chassiren training clicked one day and she passed Sara’s approval with flying colors in the tea-serving department. While this was a personal triumph as a Chassiren in training, Athena worried those Chassiren instincts would overtake her and she would not be able to retain her Thuringi skills.

Glendon was concerned about the same thing and worked with her every chance he got. Once she deferred to him politely, and he was able to get the better of her sword. Glendon swore as he grabbed her weapon and threw it across the room. Damn it, Athena! Don’t ever, ever do such a foolish thing again! When you are against an opponent, you must fight, girl; there is no room for niceties and good manners and deference to a man. I’m not training you to pour tea; I’m trying to help you stay alive! Athena quickly apologized. Glendon felt immediately guilty for shouting at her, but dared not take back his words. Make a choice, daughter. Be a passive victim or a proactive survivor.

But Father, I don’t know what I am to do. Mother drills me in the ways of her people and it’s become so much easier these days. I want to do as you instruct and I have always looked forward to it, but now it seems to go against my nature. Of course I want to be a survivor, but… such a large part of me yearns to simply appease. She wrung her hands in frustration, unable to withstand the stern look on his face. Haplessly, she trudged over to retrieve her sword and resumed the fighting stance. She looked like a creature about to be slaughtered.

Then consider this, Athena, Glendon said at last after a moment’s thought. It will please me greatly to know you have the skill and grace to wield an adequate sword. It will please me further to know you are accomplished at preventing harm to come to another, including yourself. The Air Command Oath states that we serve ‘in the name of the crown’, so act as if you are pleasing a member of the royal family. Later you may act in the name of the Ledess and the Chassiren. His suggestion rationalized the sword, and the budding young Chassiren made the best of it. After he was satisfied that her sword handling was capable of defense, he saluted her, indicating they were done. I am terribly worried, Athena.

I don’t want to let you down, Father.

I’m not worried about you letting me down, you couldn’t do anything that I would consider, ‘letting me down’, Glendon said in frustration. I am worried about your future, that’s all. Somehow your mother and you and I must come to an agreement about your personal security. It is not enough for you to behave as the traditional agreeable Chassiren in a Thuringi society. If the cadets and young officers haven’t approached you yet, they will and you must be ready to tell them a firm no. You cannot simply follow the Chassiren way. You are a Thuringi and to be accepted as such you must behave in this way. And word, a breach in the Garin protocol is simply asking to be ostracized.

She decided not to tell him that cadets and officers of all ages already approached her. They were courtly and sweet but their solicitations as to her well-being were carefully masked inquiries into her interest in them. She was far too young to court and they knew it, but they could not resist. They did not know it was the Chassiren in her which enticed them. Most scolded themselves at their interest in someone so young.

That evening Glendon sat down with Sara and Athena in their front room. Sara, Athena must be able to follow through with her Thuringi consue without being at odds with the Chassiren ways you teach her.

But she will be twenty soon, and she will need to know the code of the Chassiren.

Why? She is going to be among Thuringi, and you have seen for yourself that Thuringa has a code of its own. Even though there are many who enjoy disobeying that code, certainly no one will tolerate our Athena acquiescing to every romantic request made to her. God knows it will make me go through the roof.

I know. Sara sighed. I am trying to find a balance but in only five more years, she will be a full Chassiren. She will need to be enlightened.

Oh God, I can’t listen to this, Glendon moaned, covering his ears instinctively. Sara pulled his hands away from his head firmly.

You cannot change nature, she told him. You can force her to fight and handle a sword and storm about in boots if you wish. But when she becomes twenty years of age, she will be a Chassiren whether it is in the Garin rules or not.

May I go to Atlanta’s? Athena sighed. There is so little for me to decide here for myself. Everything is preordained, it would seem, and I hate to see you fight because of me.

We aren’t fighting, Glendon comforted her. We are having opposing views and a difficult time aligning them comfortably, that is all.

What is that, if not fighting? Athena asked crossly.

It sounds like a Chassiren sort of explanation, I thought, Glendon replied. The two Chassiren groaned and shook their heads in tolerance. Sara waved to grant Athena permission to go to the Freen. After she left, Glendon and Sara regarded each other for a moment. Finally, Glendon heaved a big sigh. I realize she is going to become a Chassiren, Sara, but as long as she is here among Thuringi she must follow our ways even though it is hard on her.

Her only other recourse is to return to Chassiren, Sara said unhappily. That will not make any of us happy. It will certainly give the Ledess knowledge enough to order the ultimate punishment for me: return to die.

I will not let that happen, Glendon barked. You are more precious to me than my own life. She will have to get past me and my Thuringi sword to harm you.

But what else can we do? You cannot bring harm to the Ledess; she would kill you or at the least, the Stellar Council will find you and thus all of Thuringa at fault.

Glendon groaned, and gathered Sara in his arms. No wonder Chassiren roar at birth, he told her. It is their one chance to defy fate.

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Chapter 114: Heart’s Pain

Springtime on Long Island, New York was a ritual time for the Peter Nolan family. During Lent they were always the most austere family in Our Lady of Mercy’s parish; at Easter they were the most decorative people in the pews. Patricia spent every Holy Saturday morning preparing the colorful egg baskets that would be set out next to each breakfast setting Easter morning, and everyone dressed in