Let It Be (A Sometimes Never novella)
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About this ebook
I’m the happy one. The dependable one.
The shoulder. The anchor. The pillar. The rock. The matchmaker.
I’m the one you call when you’ve had a bad day. When you need to vent, or scream, or cry. I will always be there to comfort you. It’s a gift. A talent. A role I’ve happily played. I’ve helped my friends become who they were meant to be. I’ve watched them move away, find love, start their lives.
But what about me?
When does my life start? Where is my happily-ever-after?
My name is Guy Handlin, and this is my story.
*This novella is a M/M New Adult romance. Recommended for 17+ due to harsh language, sexual situations, and adult themes.
**Let It Be is a companion novella to the Sometimes Never series, however, it can be read as a stand-alone book.
***Please note this novella deals with very dark subject matter.
Cheryl McIntyre
Cheryl McIntyre is the author of the bestselling Sometimes Never series, as well as the Dirty series, Infinitely, Dark Calling, HARD, Villain, and Love Sex & Other Games. She resides in Ohio with her high school sweetheart, their two sons, one daughter, and one fur son.FIND CHERYLFacebook:https://www.facebook.com/CherylMcIntyreauthorCheryl’s Blackbirds:https://www.facebook.com/groups/1006715782777752/Twitter:https://twitter.com/CherylHMcIntyreGoodreads:https://www.goodreads.com/author/show/6431156.Cheryl_McIntyreAmazon:https://amzn.to/2HudaD9BookBub:https://www.bookbub.com/authors/cheryl-mcintyreInstagram:https://www.instagram.com/cherylmcintyreauthor/Pinterest:https://www.pinterest.com/chm22480/Book+Main Bites Romance:https://bookandmainbites.com/CherylMcIntyreNewsletter:http://bit.ly/1C2azm3BOOKS BY CHERYL:New Adult Romance:~Sometimes Never~Blackbird (A Sometimes Never novella)~Before Now~Long After~Always Forever~Let It Be (A Sometimes Never novella)~Sometimes Never: The Series Box SetAdult Romance:~HardNew Adult Suspenseful Romance:~InfinitelyAdult Suspenseful Romance:~Getting Dirty (Dirty 1)~Playing Dirty (Dirty 2)~Talking Dirty (Dirty 3)~Fighting Dirty (Dirty 4)~Staying Dirty (Dirty 5)~Dirty: The Five-Part Serial Bundle~Grit: A Dirty SequelYoung Adult Paranormal Romance:~Dark Calling (Dark Calling 1)Adult Urban Fantasy:~VillainRomantic Comedy:~Love Sex & Other Games
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Let It Be (A Sometimes Never novella) - Cheryl McIntyre
Let It Be
(A Sometimes Never novella)
By Cheryl McIntyre
Let It Be (A Sometimes Never Novella)
Cheryl McIntyre
Copyright Cheryl McIntyre 2014
Published at Smashwords
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any form without prior written permission by the author except where permitted by law.
This book is a work of fiction. Any references to real persons, events, or places are used fictitiously. The characters are the work of the author’s imagination, and any resemblance to persons living or deceased, events, or locales are coincidental.
The author acknowledges the trademark status, as well as ownership of products referred to in this work of fiction. The uses of these trademarks have not been authorized, nor are they associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.
Cover photo by Scott Hoover—Courtesy of Love N. Books
Cover model Jacob Sones
Cover design by Sommer Stein
Edited by Dawn McIntyre Decker
August 2014
Table of Contents
Prologue Guy
One Guy
Two Ian
Three Guy
Four Ian
Five Guy
Six Ian
Seven Guy
Eight Ian
Nine Guy
Ten Ian
Eleven Guy
Twelve Ian
Thirteen Guy
Fourteen Ian
Fifteen Guy
Sixteen Ian
Seventeen Guy
Eighteen Ian
Epilogue Guy
Other books by Cheryl McIntyre
Acknowledgments
About the author
Prologue
Guy
I would like to say I’ve always known exactly who I am.
I’d like to tell you that I somehow skipped over the confusion and struggles with my self-esteem, self-worth, self-image. I’d like to say I have always accepted myself and my sexuality.
That I grew up gay and proud.
I’d like to say that, but it would be a lie.
At eleven years old, when most of the kids in my school were showing interest in the opposite sex, I was absorbed in music and video games. And I saw nothing wrong with that. In fact, I paid absolutely no attention to it at all.
And then one day, right around my twelfth birthday, it happened. Troy Jensen transferred to my school. He walked into my band class. Our gazes met as Mrs. Farrow introduced him, and I thought he had the nicest smile I had ever seen. His eyes were like green glass and they held me captive.
I tried to stop staring because I didn’t want him to think I was weird, but the more I looked at him, the less I wanted to look away. He was the first person I ever thought was beautiful. Not pretty. Not cute. Not glamorous or interesting.
He was beautiful.
I’d like to say it hit me like an epiphany. That the clouds parted and the sun shone down on me with a sudden clarity as trumpets played the sweetest symphony. That I realized I was gay. And I was okay with it.
I’d like to say that—I really wish I could—but it would be a lie.
No matter how incredibly right it felt, it just felt wrong.
I felt wrong.
So I fought against it. I tried to ignore it. I hid it from everyone. Especially Troy Jensen. The more my friends talked about girls, the more I tried to embrace heterosexuality. I joined in the discussions about girls—who was the prettiest, who I wanted to get to which base with, who was most likely to allow me to get to those bases, and so on.
But the whole time, I knew it was a lie.
I didn’t want it to be untrue. I tried to force myself to actually feel the way I was pretending to feel. Claiming to feel. Begging to feel.
But I couldn’t do it.
No matter how hard I tried, no matter how hard I fought—and against everything I was raised to believe—I couldn’t hide from the fact that I was different.
I liked boys.
I liked boys the way my friends liked girls.
And so, one day, I started using my closet for what it was really meant for—clothes and shoes, and random shit you can’t find a place for—and I stepped out. Because I wasn’t some random thing that didn’t have a place.
I was a person who just wanted one thing out of my life. The same thing everyone, everywhere wants.
Happiness.
And you can’t be happy living a lie.
I decided being different was a blessing—not a mistake, not a curse, not a disease. And I had every right to that happiness as everyone else.
Unfortunately for me, I didn’t understand what true happiness was until it was taken away.
One
Guy
I don’t know exactly when it all went wrong. Maybe I should know. Maybe that was the problem. But I didn’t have a clue. Looking back, I realize there were signs. Nothing big or glaring, but signs all the same. If I only understood what I was looking at.
When Ian frowned, I would tickle him until he laughed. When he refused to get out of bed, I would lay in bed with him, vegging out and watching TV alongside of him. When he refused to go out with me because he was tired or sick for the fourth time that week, I would bug him, making him feel guilty until I either got my way or gave up. And when he would pick