Wrong Reasons Trilogy

Chapter 1

Bob Seger belted out loudly – urging me to take those old records off the shelf - and made me wince. I pulled my pillow over my head to block out the noise but my mother was relentless. And I really, honestly detested that song.

I knew it was time for a new pillow when I was able to hear the timid rap at my door. So much for all that fluffy filling blocking out the world. I groaned and sat up, kicking my blankets to the foot of my bed. Come in, I shouted.

The door creaked open a smidgen and a tuft of red hair was visible through the crack. I giggled. Tommy, just come in already. I’m decent.

Forcing the door open, my little cousin peeked shyly at me. He did this every time my mother played music – the loud noise frightened him and he’d come to me for comfort.

His airplane pajamas were faded and rumpled and showed quite a bit of his ankles but he didn’t seem to notice. He smiled when he realized I was telling the truth that I was indeed wearing pajamas and not running around my room scantily clad or nude – not like I did that on a regular basis.

We have school, he said simply, standing in the doorway. Aunt Mina is playing loud music and we have school. His freckled nose crunched up in distaste and confusion. Tommy hated to have his morning routine broken by the slightest thing.

I’ll ask her to turn it off, okay Tommy? I asked gently as I tousled his hair.

Nodding, he slipped his hand into mine. Breakfast?

Sure, I said. Waffles today? It is Monday after all.

His smile was answer enough so I led him down the stairs, wincing again as Mick Jaggar slyly requested some woman to start him up.

My mother loved music – especially the classics. She’d spent her youth bouncing from garage band to garage band, singing and shaking her ass for all it was worth. She’d always dreamed of being on stage in some skimpy outfit with electric guitars screaming behind her and fans cheering in front of her. When that didn’t work out, she’d settled for following her favorite band around the country. That was where she met my father. Unfortunately for her –and me, too, I suppose – she just couldn’t remember which one helped in my conception. Oh, she had it narrowed down to three or four and for that I suppose I was grateful.

Tugging Tommy through the cramped living room, I dropped his hand as I marched over to the CD player and pressed the stop button. Blessed silence greeted my ears. I glanced at Tommy and smiled. Better?

He nodded.

Hey! What happened to the music? my mother asked, frowning as she entered the room. She was still as beautiful as I imagined she’d been in high school with dark blonde hair, thin waist and long legs. She had a pert nose and pretty blue eyes. I was fortunate to have inherited all of her features except the long legs and the large bust – but I wasn’t complaining. I didn’t need beauty – I needed the brains that I must have inherited from my grandparents. Intelligence and an excellent college degree were what I’d use to get through life. I loved my mother fiercely but I refused to turn into her.

Tommy didn’t like it so loud, I said as I took Tommy’s hand again. It’s a school morning, remember? He likes waffles and cartoons.

Oh, Tommy baby, my mother crooned as she hugged him. I forgot, darling. Go turn on your cartoons and I’ll fix your waffles.

I flashed my mother a grateful smile as we both headed to the kitchen. Thomas was a responsibility my mother definitely didn’t need but she would never give him up. Aunt Gloria – my mother’s older sister – was even flightier than my mother. She showed up at our door one day about three years ago with an adorable, red-headed little boy and handed him over to my mother. Aunt Gloria just couldn’t handle raising a child - especially one with special needs. After Tommy had been with us a few months, I urged my mother to take him to the doctor where he was later diagnosed with a mild case of OCD. That, combined with his red hair and freckles, made him a perfect target on the playground. Luckily for us, Tommy had some strange friendship going on with Gabriel Madison who was rumored to be the elementary school bully. He kept a close eye on Tommy and never let anyone touch him.

Are you excited about starting college today? my mother asked as she hunted in the freezer for frozen waffles.

Shrugging, I grabbed a granola bar. I peeled away the wrapper and nibbled on the end as I contemplated my day. New classes, new friends, new professors – I wasn’t sure excited was the word. And the weird thing was that I would be living on campus.

My mother’s house was exactly nineteen minutes from the driveway to the Administration Building of Dunne-Browling University and I would have been perfectly happy to commute every day. Unfortunately, I was not footing the bill for this expensive and elaborate school – my grandparents were. They insisted I live in the dorms so I could experience college life like a coed should. I suspected it was their way of getting me out of my mother’s clutches.

I guess, I mumbled as I finished my granola bar and raced upstairs to shower.

All my things were already in my dorm and mostly unpacked. I had intended on sleeping in my new college bed Sunday night but my mother had insisted that I stay one more evening at home. Like I wouldn’t be home on the weekends or something.

Still, I’d stayed and I was actually grateful that I did. Tommy would never have opened his mouth to tell my mother to shut off the music – instead he would have sat in his room, rocking back and forth on his bed, until she shut it off. And who knows how long it would have taken her to check on him.

I sighed as I dressed, thinking about the schedule I’d posted on the refrigerator.

Mom, make sure you follow this, I said, tapping the schedule with my finger as I waltzed back into the kitchen. You know how upset Tommy gets.

I will, I will, she said, removing Tommy’s waffles from the toaster. She dropped them on his favorite soccer plate, buttered, and cut them. She squeezed just the right amount of syrup on top then called gently to Tommy. He scuttled into the room and sat in his usual chair at the table.

I glanced at the clock, kissed the top of Tommy’s head, and snatched my keys off the holder near the back door. I need to go, I announced. I want to at least meet my roommates before my first class.

Oh, my mother said, pressing her hand to her heart. My little girl is off to college.

I refrained from rolling my eyes and settled for pecking her cheek. I doubt if I will be home for dinner tonight. I need to get situated.

Well, call me, she ordered as she clutched the back of Tommy’s chair. I promised I would, waved, and exited quickly.

I sprinted to my car and nearly squealed out of the driveway. I was on my way to freedom.

***

You must be Irelyn Colby, a very slim brunette grinned as I breezed through the dorm room door. I was determined to start this whole new experience off with confidence.

I would hope, another girl snorted as she lounged on a sofa, dark eyes on the television. Otherwise, someone made copies of our keys. She stood and smirked, offering me a hand. She had striking features and long, nearly jet black hair. She had exaggerated curves and a pronounced bust – just what I’d always wished I’d had. Her eyes appeared black, too, but as I drew closer I could tell they were just an unusually dark shade of brown. I’m Bailey Foxworth. She shook my hand and gestured toward the other girl. That’s Morgan Taylor.

I’m Irelyn, I said, though they already knew that. It’s nice to meet you.

So, why didn’t you sleep here last night? Morgan asked. She was cute – shoulder length hair, hazel eyes, slender figure, and a warm, sweet smile.

I grinned sheepishly as I dropped to a chair. It’s actually sort of stupid, I admitted. I live less than twenty miles from here but my grandparents really wanted me to live in the dorms.

Bailey snorted and shared my disdainful smile. Ah, the adults – always know what’s best for us, don’t they?

So they think, I mumbled.

***

I adjusted to my classes rather quickly – though I’d always been sort of a nerd. I made a few tentative friends and agreed to join a study group. Life was settling in comfortably.

Neither of my roommates was in my classes but we always managed to gather in the evening to watch reality shows or just talk about the new people we’d met. Neither of the girls had a steady boyfriend – although Bailey had plenty of experience with boys – and they loved to question me about my eighteen month relationship with Dustin Summerlin.

The other girls had adjusted to college life, too, and often had adventurous stories to tell me every Monday when I returned to the dorm. While I spent my weekends with Mom and Tommy, and having dinner at the country club with Dustin, they spent theirs meeting interesting people and attending fun parties.

One Thursday night about a month after the semester started, we huddled in our pajamas on the cozy sofa Bailey’s parents had paid for and ignored the TV as Morgan bounced up and down, exciting news ready to burst from her lips.

This girl, Candace Harvey, she’s in my Lit class, Morgan gushed, her cheeks flushed and her eyes bright. She said that everyone is going to Rusty’s tomorrow night. Apparently, Out Back is playing and she said we should go check it out.

My brow furrowed as I tried to grasp her words. It was a difficult task due to all the bouncing that made her speech a little hard to follow. Okay, call me stupid but what is Rusty’s and what is Out Back?

Bailey clamped her hands on Morgan’s shoulders, forcing her to sit still. She turned her beautiful eyes on me as her luscious lips curled into a smirk. Rusty’s is a bar and Out Back is a local band. I've heard them - they're pretty good- and word around campus is that they’ve made quite the name for themselves in the area.

Candace says local critics have compared them to Fall Out Boy and Linkin Park, Morgan squealed.

I stifled a groan and nodded. I wasn’t much into modern music as my mother gave me daily doses of classics. Aerosmith I knew – Fall Out Boy, or whatever, not so much. I was a little leery to reveal my ignorance so I just nodded my head.

Cool.

We should so go, Morgan said. It’ll be great.

I definitely wasn’t excited about the prospect of spending a Friday night in a cramped bar with a bunch of drunken college kids puking and screaming while a band did their best to imitate their idols. If that was the case, I could go home and help Mom out in the pub she managed.

But, as Morgan was far more conservative than Bailey, I didn’t think it would be that bad…

I’m in, Bailey said with a shrug. I’d only known her a short time but I could tell that she was already planning to hook up with some guy for the night. She glanced at me and my heart jumped – I thought she’d read my mind. You in, Irelyn?

It was on the tip of my tongue to bow out but I really wanted to fit in here. I wanted to make friends, do well in my classes, and start my life. Besides, what would it hurt? I didn’t have to drink and it wasn’t like I was going to guy hunt. I smiled, suddenly eager. Yeah, sure. I’m not going to see Dustin this weekend, anyway.

***

I nearly changed my mind when we pulled up to the bar Friday night. The place was packed and the girls had dressed me in a short, tight skirt and a shirt that dipped far too low in my opinion. Definitely not my usual apparel.

Taking a deep breath, I tossed my blonde hair over my shoulders. I was determined to have fun and maybe have a funny story to tell Dustin when I called him Saturday.

Let’s go, Morgan said eagerly as she took my hand.

Rolling her eyes, Bailey strolled casually behind us. Morgan, quit acting like a virgin looking to get laid and just relax. The band doesn’t go on for twenty minutes yet.

In the pale light, I could see color touch Morgan’s cheeks but the smile never left her face. I was a little surprised because she struck me as more like my type – quiet, studious, and not much of a party person.

The bar was larger inside than it appeared on the outside. A bar stretched across the back, dirty-mirrored wall. Every stool was full and three harried waitresses scurried among the thirty or so square tables, delivering drinks and collecting tips.

A stage was positioned opposite the bar and a drum kit already sat waiting, along with two microphone stands and a couple of guitars. I didn’t see any band members anywhere though I was probably looking for someone with long hair wearing spandex - my mother's type of band members. I wasn’t really sure what people who played in bands looked like these days – even guys who were only known in my little corner of the world.

There’s a table! Morgan shouted above the din as she dragged me to the corner of the stage. Empty bottles and overflowing ashtrays covered the top but the chairs were empty so we snagged them.

A waitress floated over to clear the mess with a meager smile. Bailey ordered a whiskey and soda while Morgan and I just ordered soda. Bailey gave us one of her fabulous eye rolls before informing us that we would be drinking something with a little more kick by the end of the night. I hesitated to tell her that the hardest drink I’d ever had was a little red wine with dinner at my grandparents’ house. The look on Morgan’s face told me that she was in the same boat.

I didn’t dwell on the drink situation because the house lights flickered on and off as three guys jumped on the stage. The bar patrons went wild and I straightened, ready to see what the fuss was all about.

Once the spotlight hit the lead singer, my breath left me in one noisy whoosh. Luckily, the music so loud that no one noticed. I finished my soda as my eyes drank in the lean form strumming his fingers manically over the guitar strings and singing with his mouth provocatively close to the microphone.

He wasn’t as tall as Dustin in my estimation but he was thinner. He’d ripped the sleeves off his black t-shirt to reveal a decent muscular build. His hair was sandy brown and gelled in a messy fashion while his eyes reflected the spotlight – their color still unknown to me.

He definitely wasn’t as clean-cut handsome as Dustin but something about him attracted me like bees to honey and all those other cheesy sayings. I closed my eyes as I listened to his voice, imagining being wrapped in his arms on some lumpy mattress in a smoky hotel room.

I sighed, opening my eyes, my cheeks burning. My greatest ambition was to be a writer and I often found myself letting my imagination run away in situations like this. But this man singing was the epitome of any leading man I’d ever conjured.

By the time the band started their second set, I was on my second vodka and cranberry juice, compliments of Bailey. And it wasn’t too bad. It at least helped me relax so I could enjoy the music.

My pulse shot through my veins when the band started a ballad and the lead singer’s eyes met mine. His lips curled in a sardonic smile as his gaze remained fixed on mine. My heart thumped in my throat and I couldn’t move. I understood immediately how a rabbit felt when it hopped innocently into the path of a rattlesnake.

Giving a low chuckle, Bailey rested her arm on the back of my chair. She leaned in close to me to whisper in my ear. I think Lucas likes you.

Huh? I asked, still mesmerized by the man on the stage.

Laughing, she shook my shoulders. Lucas, the lead singer, she said a little louder. I snapped my head in her direction as my jaw fell. She stuck her index finger under my chin and closed my mouth. You’ll catch flies.

What are you talking about? I managed to utter.

She laughed again, her dark eyes filled with amusement. She nodded at the stage and I chanced a quick look over my shoulder but the lead singer’s eyes were darting throughout the crowd. His name is Lucas and he can’t stop looking at you.

But…but… I stammered. I have a boyfriend. I winced as I heard the stupid words fall out of my mouth. The lead singer, er, Lucas, wouldn’t know about Dustin. An electric thrill zipped through my body. Maybe it was the alcohol. What should I do?

Smile at him, she said with a lift of her shoulder. She leaned back confidently in her chair and lowered her lids. And not an idiotic smile.

I nodded, slightly doubtful. It wasn’t cheating, right? Just flirting. I tossed back the remainder of my drink and motioned for the waitress to bring us all another round. My heart was free and I was feeling adventurous. I wanted to be able to giggle and laugh with my friends on Monday as we relived the weekend together.

The band ended their performance to raucous applause and Bailey nudged me annoyingly. Go say hi, she said.

With Dutch courage, I scooted my chair back clumsily and made my way through the hordes of fans anxious to congratulate the band on a great performance. By the time I reached the stage, the guys were gone. Heaving a sigh, I perched on the edge, dejected. I glanced at our table, blinking rapidly, trying to focus, and found a small group of brave guys congregating around Bailey and Morgan. Sighing again, I was considering either grabbing a cab or getting another drink when someone sat beside me, offering a glass.

Cranberry and vodka, he said with a hint of an accent. That’s what Marissa said you were drinking.

I looked into the soulful brown eyes of Lucas, the lead singer. I smiled, hoping it wasn’t idiotic, and accepted the drink. Thanks. Um, Marissa, whoever she is, was right.

He smiled and I immediately fell in love with his mouth. His teeth were perfectly straight and amazingly white while his eyes crinkled in the corners with the weight of his smile. I’m Lucas, by the way. Lucas Newton.

Um, Irelyn Colby, I said and sipped my drink. You guys are really good.

Thanks. Glad you enjoyed the show.

I inched closer, not able to help myself. His grin widened as he planted a palm on the stage right behind me. He inclined his head closer and his beer breath tickled my ear. It’s sort of stuffy in here – want to go grab some air?

Yeah, I said a little too quickly. Sure.

He plucked the drink from my hand, set it on the stage, and laced his fingers through mine. He helped me up and led me through a narrow hall and into an alley. The air had a bit of a bite to it making me shiver. He pushed me against the brick building and rubbed my arms, trying to create a little friction. I could have told him that his touch was enough to heat my insides but I was enjoying his hands on my body far more than I should.

Better? he asked with raised brow. Before I could nod, his lips were on mine. I clutched his t-shirt, wrinkling it in my fists, as I returned his kiss. When his tongue traced my bottom lip, I groaned as my knees buckled. He grabbed my hips and pulled me to his body. My hands climbed his chest and laced behind his head. I couldn’t believe this was happening but I didn’t want it to stop. Never had so much passion raced through my body – even when Dustin and I let things get out of hand.

Want to take this inside? he asked as he dragged his lips from mine and trailed them along my jaw. I lifted my neck so he could reach my throat.

Yes, I gasped.

If you’re sure, he mumbled. He edged back and his glossy eyes bored into mine.

I already missed his touch. I’m sure.

His lips returned to my neck. I could feel his smile on my skin as he steered my body up a set of metal stairs. I held tightly to his shoulders so I wouldn’t fall, clinging to his body as he dug a key out of his jeans pocket to unlock a door.

I barely registered where we were as he backed me into another room. I fell on a mattress and yanked him on top of me. I felt like an animal that had escaped from a lifelong imprisonment as he resumed his frantic kisses. The heat from his body was scorching and I happily helped him remove my clothes.

As heated as our kisses had been, I expected the sex to be the same way. But it wasn’t. Lucas slowed his pace and left not one inch of my body unexplored. When he finally took me, every nerve in my body was on edge and aching for him.

Afterwards, he dropped beside me, his chest heaving. I was having the same struggles with my breath – and with my guilt. What had I done?

Chapter 2

Rolling to his side, Lucas traced my lips tenderly with his index finger. I closed my eyes, my traitorous body responding to his touch. I needed to move away and dress and escape. I needed to run home and hide under the blankets of my bed and not come out until my mother forced me. I needed to figure out what I was going to tell Dustin. I needed to figure out what I was going to tell myself.

You okay, love? he asked as he yanked the blanket out from under me to cover both our bodies.

Yeah, I whispered. Fine.

Inching closer, he rested his head next to mine. He fumbled for my hand, lacing our fingers on top of my stomach. Stay with me tonight. I’ll drive you home in the morning.

I can’t…I shouldn’t, I tried to object.

He dragged his lips across the side of my neck and I shuddered. Stay, Irelyn. You know you want to.

I did. I wanted to stay more than anything else at that moment. And if I did, I could prolong this amazingly ridiculous situation in which I’d suddenly plunged. Why not prolong the agony? Or rather, the pleasure. No need to have to face reality until the ugly rays of day smacked me in the face.

Um, do you live here? I asked stupidly.

When he chuckled, his breath blew my hair and tickled my ear. No. This is Spencer’s place. I have a key. But don’t worry – this is the spare room.

My eyes popped open and I nearly bolted upright. Is he here? Is he coming home?

Laughing, he released my hand to trail his fingers up my body and to my face. He stroked my cheek. Spencer will crash at my place tonight.

Um, who’s Spencer?

The other guitarist who happens to be my cousin. Collin, the drummer, is my brother. He propped his head with his hand, smiling at me. I melted. My twin. Fraternal.

Oh, that’s um cool. I cursed my utterly stupid, idiotic mouth. My first one-night stand and the only pillow talk I could come up with is ‘that’s cool’?

Where do you live? So I know where to take you in the morning, he asked.

Dunne-Browling. The dorms.

Ah, a college student, he said as he dropped his head next to mine. How come I haven’t seen you at Rusty’s before?

First time, I said. My head grew groggy and my eyelids heavy. The tender caress of his fingers on my skin lulled me into a drowsy state.

Sleep, love, he whispered as he kissed the skin under my ear.

***

I came to before the sun and eased out of Lucas’s grasp. Snorting in his sleep, he rolled to his back. I froze, afraid he’d wake, but he didn’t.

I slipped off the bed to gather my clothes. I hurriedly dressed, grabbed my bag, and jumped as something thumped to the floor. I watched Lucas carefully but he didn’t budge. Once I was sure he was still out, I tiptoed out of the room and stumbled through the dark apartment until I found the front door.

I pounded down the metal stairs to flee through the alley, the cool, early morning air nipping at my arms. As I reached the sidewalk, I rifled through my bag for my phone. Panic seized me when I couldn’t find it and I glanced toward the alley.

It must have fallen out of my bag, I groaned. I rubbed my forehead as I looked left and right. Finding a corner diner, I crossed the street. I went inside, ordered a coffee, and asked for a public phone. The waitress directed me to the hall where a payphone was perched between the bathrooms. I called Bailey’s cell hoping she was in the dorm and not with a guy.

Yeah, what? she said sleepily.

I breathed a sigh of relief. Bailey, can you come get me? I don’t think I have enough cash for a cab.

Irelyn? she whispered. Are you okay? Did he hurt you?

No, I’m fine, really. I just, I’m having coffee at the diner near the bar. Can you come get me?

Yeah, I’ll be there in twenty minutes, she said and hung up.

I returned to the counter and sipped my coffee, praying Lucas wouldn’t wake up only to find me gone. I didn’t want him to come looking for me. I didn’t want to explain that I didn’t do these sorts of things. I didn’t want to explain that I had a boyfriend. I didn’t want to explain that my grandparents definitely would not approve.

Mostly, I didn’t want him to talk me into going back to the apartment with him.

Bailey found me fifteen minutes later. I paid my bill and hurried her out of the diner. Once we were buckled safely in her car and on the road, I sank into the seat. Thank you.

What happened? she demanded. I saw you leave with Lucas but I never expected you to stay the night with him. I tried to call your cell but you didn’t answer. His brother told me that Lucas thought you were cute and just wanted to talk to you.

Bailey, I said, interrupting her. He didn’t do anything I didn’t want him to do, I admitted with blazing cheeks. He gave me the chance to back out.

Bailey grinned as her hands relaxed on the wheel. Well, then, how was it?

Amazing, I groaned, squeezing my eyes shut. I rested my head against the cool window and forced away images of Lucas and me writhing on the bed.

What? she asked. What’s the problem?

I have a boyfriend, remember? What the hell am I supposed to tell him?

Nothing, she snorted. Not a damn thing. Do you think he’s being faithful to you?

Yes, I said without hesitation. He loves me. And I love him.

Exactly, she said. You love him and you slept with someone else.

Bailey, I don’t want to talk about it right now, I pleaded. I just want to get to the dorms and get some sleep. I have to go home in the morning. Well, this morning.

Okay, Irelyn, she said. And we’ll keep this between us. But, um, Morgan kind of figured out what you were up to, also.

Just you two know, right? I asked. She nodded and I closed my eyes, minutely relieved. The next problem was facing my mother and hiding my guilt. I’d have to distract her somehow.

A slow smile spread across my lips as my eyes eased open. I turned fully toward Bailey.

She lifted a brow. What?

How would you and Morgan like to spend the weekend at my house?

***

Oh, this is going to be so fun, my mother gushed as I pushed Bailey and Morgan into the house. I hope you girls brought something nice to wear – we have to have dinner with my parents at the country club tonight but after that – it’s party time!

I groaned as I dropped my bag on the living room floor and surveyed my roommates. Amusement sparkled in Bailey’s eyes as a tiny smirk lurked in the corners of her mouth. She nodded at my mother and produced a slinky red dress from her bag.

Will this do, Ms. Colby?

Mom’s eyes brightened as she eyed the garment. Oh, it’s perfect! I wish my Irelyn would wear dresses like that and show off her figure.

Don’t start, Mom, I said.

At what country club will we be dining? Morgan asked with a concise, polite tone. Obviously, she’d paid more attention to her parents’ lessons on manners than Bailey.

Whispering Winds, Mom said and rolled her eyes. It’s nothing but a fancy place for stuffy people to meet and brag about how much money they have. But, my parents insist on us having dinner with them every weekend. They like to keep up with what’s going on with Irelyn and Tommy.

Where is Tommy? I asked as I peered around the living room.

Mom’s eyes sparkled as she clapped her hands in delight. Piano lessons! Oh, Irelyn, his music teacher called and told me that he is an absolute genius on the piano! We arranged for lessons immediately and he loves it!

I beamed, heart pumping happily. I hoped this new development would bring a little joy to Tommy’s life and give him something to concentrate on besides his fastidious room and his obsession over cartoons. When will he be home? I want him to meet my friends.

Not for another hour or so, she said. Why don’t you show the girls your room?

***

Bailey attracted quite a bit of male attention – both young and old – as we followed my mother through the club’s dining room to the table where my grandparents were already seated. Her red dress clung to her hips and hung above her knee while revealing enough cleavage to cause eyes to linger.

Tommy had taken an instant liking to her and clutched her hand, much to her amusement. I was a little concerned that her crass attitude would frighten him but her eyes gentled so uncharacteristically when she shook his hand, it made my heart warm.

Morgan walked beside me looking lovely in a light green dress with a modest neckline and hem. Her hair was held back with clips that matched her dress and teardrop diamond earrings sparkled in her lobes.

I plodded along in one of the many dresses my grandmother sent me – dresses appropriate for a young lady to wear. It was blue and expensive and not very flattering but I wore it anyway just to please my grandparents.

As I’d watched my friends dress, I had wished for something a little more flashy and trendy – something that would make people notice me as Irelyn and not the Colby’s granddaughter. But then, that would be too much like my mother and I couldn’t lose sight of my ambition to not turn out like her.

I introduced my friends to my grandparents and it was immediately obvious which one they preferred. They were polite enough to Bailey – especially when she explained her father owned a chain of high-priced department stores in the US and overseas and had an entire wing at Dunne-Browling named after them. A twinge of pity struck my heart for my poor grandfather – he only had a section of the library named after him.

Cocktails were being served but Bailey refrained from ordering anything alcoholic, much to my relief. As the conversation around the table turned to college life, my grandmother smiled as she nodded over my shoulder. When I turned, I found a grinning Dustin rolling on the balls of his feet. My heart fell and gasped as it wondered what to do. I gaped at him, hoping he couldn’t see my indiscretion in my eyes.

Bailey kicked my shin, effectively shaking me out of my stupor. I returned Dustin’s smile as I got to my feet to hug him and kiss his cheek. My grandparents were watching and they simply abhorred displays of affection in public.

I, um, thought you weren’t coming home this weekend? I asked.

He cupped my cheek as his lips turned in the corners. I couldn’t stay away from you for that long.

My guilty heart cursed me and decided to turn on the waterworks. Tears prickled behind my eyes but I bit the inside of my cheek to keep them at bay. That’s wonderful, I managed to utter and sound nearly sincere. My friends are here. Um, I’d like you to meet them.

I introduced him to Bailey and Morgan as Morgan scooted over to allow Dustin the chair next to me. He held my hand under the table, politely answering my grandparents’ questions: No, his parents were not dining at the club tonight – they had theater tickets. Yes, classes were going well and he was enjoying college in Chicago.

I studied his profile as he spoke, turning his charming smile on my grandmother. I’d met him my sophomore year of high school after my grandparents, who had never shown any interest in me before, discovered that I actually had a brain and it was quite intelligent. They immediately enrolled me at St. Catherine’s, a pristine and exclusive private school.

My mother, being stubborn and full of pride, didn’t have the money the other students’ parents did. My mother refused to accept any money from my grandparents – although she would not turn down their offer of a better education for me. Other than that, she chose to work and earn her own way. I was quite proud of that. But my peers frowned at it and looked down their surgically enhanced noses at me.

I definitely hadn’t fit in at all.

I’d studied and kept to myself until one cold, icy day, I fell in the parking lot, dumping the entire contents of my backpack. Dustin appeared and instead of laughing, he helped me collect my belongings then eased me off the ground. From that moment on, I had one friend at St. Catherine’s. It wasn’t until midway through our junior year that he admitted his feelings and we started dating. My grandmother was ecstatic and my grandfather approved. Dustin’s father was a successful attorney with a clean reputation. Dustin would make a wonderful addition to our family.

Mom liked Dustin, too, but she wasn’t ‘in love’ with him like my grandparents. As I listened to him speak, my thoughts floated away to Lucas and I wondered what Mom would think of him…

Irelyn? Dustin asked.

Huh? I said as heat flooded my cheeks. I’m sorry, I was…um…thinking about an assignment.

He smiled gently as he squeezed my hand. It’s Saturday night – time to relax and not think about school. I ordered the chicken for you, is that okay?

It’s fine, I said, banishing all thoughts of Lucas away. How dare I let him in my head while I was sitting next to my wonderful boyfriend! What was wrong with me?

After dinner, the five piece band began to play softly and Grandfather led Grandmother out to the dance floor. I stifled a groan. Dustin would be expected to dance with me.

Tommy, do you dance? Bailey asked.

Tommy considered her, wide-eyed, and shook his red head. I don’t know how.

I can show you, she said as she gently coaxed him to the dance floor. My mother beamed.

Come, sweetheart, Dustin said as he took my hand.

He wrapped his arms around me properly, holding me appropriately as he swayed his body in time to the music. His touch was warm and familiar and … boring. I longed for him to break the rules – to tug me closer while his breath warmed my neck and shoulder. I wanted him to whisper in my ear how much my closeness affected him.

He didn’t. He wouldn’t. Dustin Summerlin always abided by the rules.

Sorry I didn’t let you know I’d be here, he said as his eyes swept my face. I wanted to surprise you.

Don’t worry about it, I said. I like surprises.

I know you do, he said with an adorable smirk. That’s why I booked us a room at that little bed and breakfast you said you always wanted to visit.

My eyes grew as a little color touched my cheeks. Dustin, my friends are staying at my house tonight, I said, glancing at my grandparents to make sure they couldn’t hear our conversation.

I know, he frowned. Sort of blows the whole surprise, huh? I nodded apologetically. He kissed my cheek. I’ll reschedule, don’t worry. He eased back to look at me, his eyes dark and his brow low. Are you feeling all right? You’ve been awfully quiet tonight.

I forced a smile. I told you, I’ve been thinking about an assignment that is due next week. I haven’t even started on it yet.

Stop worrying about it, he said. Enjoy your weekend home with your friends. Worry about school on Monday. The song ended and he wrapped an arm around my waist. I’m going to head over to a friend’s house but I’ll call you tomorrow.

My cell phone! He couldn’t call my cell phone. I was pretty sure that I’d lost it in Spencer’s apartment but I wasn’t sure who had it or if it was still lying on the floor. Um, I misplaced my phone so I’ll have to call you, okay?

He paused momentarily before removing his arm from my waist to clutch my shoulders. Do you know where you lost it? Or do you think it’s gone for good? I can get you a new one.

That’s not necessary, I said trying to smile. I think I left it in one of my classes. I’ll get it this week.

Doubt flickered in his eyes and gave my heart a mild panic attack. Could he see my lies? Did he realize what an awful, evil person I was? Okay, sweetheart, but if you don’t find it, let me know and I can get you a new one.

I knew better than to object for when it came to gifts, Dustin was both generous and persistent. Sure.

He bid his goodnights to everyone and I excused myself to walk him to the doors. He yanked me outside away from the windows and pressed his lips firmly against mine. Startled, I clutched his shoulders, not used to such force from him, but somewhat pleased.

He ripped his lips from mine, a satisfied smirk covering his mouth. That’s what I needed. Call me when you can and quit stressing over school. I’ll see you next weekend.

Okay, I said as I fingered my lips. I watched him disappear in the parking lot before returning to the dining room.

That night, I huddled in a sleeping bag on the living room floor between Morgan and Bailey. My room was too small to accommodate us all so we were forced to camp out downstairs.

Bailey, I lost my phone Friday night, I said as soon as my mother drifted up the stairs to her own bedroom. I lost it in the apartment.

She laughed and folded her arms behind her head. Well, guess you’ll have to get it back.

I groaned and fell to my pillow, grinding my teeth. I can not go back there.

Sure you can, Morgan piped in. Lucas doesn’t live there, Spencer does. Just knock on the door and ask Spencer if he found your phone.

I gnawed on my bottom lip. I could do that.

Bailey chuckled in the dark and I turned my head, barely able to make out her features. Do you actually think Lucas would leave the phone there? she asked.

Why not? Morgan asked.

Bailey propped her head on her hand. Well, if it was as good as Irelyn said it was, then he’ll want to see her again. Therefore, Lucas probably has the phone. He won’t want Spencer or anyone else to give it to her.

Oh, this is so not good, I whined. I don’t want to see him again.

Oh, cheer up, Irelyn, Bailey said. What’s the big deal? They play at Rusty’s every Friday night during the fall and winter. You go down there and ask him for your phone. He can’t very well convince you to sleep with him in a crowded bar.

You say that now… I said, my heart relaxing. She actually made sense. Maybe if I did confront him with a bunch of people around, I’d keep my head and not think about how amazing his lips felt against my skin. Little sparks of desire tickled my gut. Okay, I’ll go over there Friday and ask him for my phone.

Bailey lowered her head to her pillow, a satisfied smirk on her face.

I closed my eyes and tried to sleep – thinking that exhaustion would find me easily. I’d been far too busy the previous night to rest and it had to be catching up with me.

But the minute my eyes closed, I recalled every touch; every kiss. I imagined his lips leaving my mouth to make a trail down my chin, over my throat and to my breasts. I shuddered and squeezed my eyes tighter, urging the thoughts out of my head. I needed to be thinking about Dustin and how wonderful he was. I needed to focus on school and getting my degree. I needed to remember that Lucas was exactly the sort of guy my mother probably slept with when she conceived me. He’d get what he wanted until he grew tired – then he’d throw me away and find someone new.

Maybe he’d catch a break and get discovered, forcing him move away to New York or LA to sign a record contract. He’d forget all about me as he plunged into the glittery world of rock n roll. All the beautiful women throwing themselves at him…

Or, maybe he’d take me with him and we’d rent a penthouse overlooking Central Park or a bungalow on the ocean. I’d accompany him to all his functions and afterwards, we’d return home and make love all night.

I fell into an uneasy sleep, dreams of big cities, passion. And Lucas floating in my head.

Chapter 3

The next week was pretty much hell. Thoughts of Lucas drifted in my head only to be immediately washed away by guilt. I had to get over this little Lucas fantasy and concentrate on Dustin. I loved him, after all, and he loved me. What we had was the perfect fairy tale romance with me starring as Cinderella, only, minus the evil stepmother.

Dustin was my prince. He’d rescued me from the snobs at St. Catherine’s and swept me off my feet. He’d showed me that not everyone who had money and nice things were evil and I, in turn, introduced him to my world.

Our relationship had slowly evolved into something serious and eventually the hand-holding and sweet kisses had turned fervent. We’d succumbed to desire one spring night not too long ago in his bedroom while his parents were in Paris. It had been awkward, a little painful, but very sweet. He’d professed his undying love to me and I’d promised that someday we’d marry.

Lucas threatened to ruin all of that - Lucas and my stupid phone that just had to fall out of my bag.

By the time Friday night rolled around, my nerves were raw and my concentration shot. I couldn’t focus on a single thing. Morgan fretted over me while Bailey just laughed.

Girl, you need another roll with him – that will relax you, she suggested.

I shook my head furiously as I gathered my hair and fastened a rubber band around it. No, not at all. That’s what’s got me all in a tizzy in the first place. I don’t need to do it again.

Is that what you’re wearing? Morgan asked, hands on her hips as she surveyed my jeans and Dunne-Browling sweatshirt. When I nodded, she frowned, tsking me. You need to spruce up a little more, honey.

Oh, no, I said, holding up my hands. No. I’m not going there dressed up in …sleazy clothes. I don’t want him to get the wrong idea.

Sleazy, Bailey snorted as she adjusted the neckline of her blouse to reveal a little more cleavage. Do I look sleazy, Morg?

You look rather lovely, Bailey, Morgan smiled.

Groaning, I dropped my brush in order to pick up my bag. Ha ha. Now, will one of you please come with me?

Oh, we both are, honey, Bailey smirked. We have a lot money riding on this.

***

Rusty’s wasn’t quite as packed – there was a huge football game that night and most of the student body was attending. Plus, we were early as I wanted to catch them before they went on stage

I wanted to just stand around and wait for Lucas to arrive. I just wanted to get my phone and leave but Bailey insisted on getting a table and having a couple drinks. I relented – she was my ride. She chose the same table we’d sat at the week before and my cheeks started to burn. I chastised myself – the man wasn’t even in the room and I was already fantasizing about him – reliving the past Friday.

Bailey nudged me while Morgan released a quiet squeal forcing me to snap to attention. I turned toward the stage and there he was, in all his sexy glory, helping his brother set up the drums.

My heartbeat sped up and my palms started to sweat. My leg wiggled and my hands trembled. Desire burned my groin and spread throughout my body. I wanted him – badly.

Go get your phone, Bailey said, her eyes sparkling in amusement. Nodding, I urged my legs to take me to the stage.

As it seemed none of the boys noticed me, I wondered if I should clear my throat or just call Lucas’s name. I glanced over my shoulder at the table but Bailey narrowed her eyes and waved her hand toward Lucas.

Did you need something, darling? a voice asked behind me. It wasn’t Lucas but I still didn’t want to turn around.

What she needs, you can’t give her, Lucas laughed. I closed my eyes, counted to three, and then faced him. He grinned, his teeth still as white and perfect, the corners of his eyes still crinkling.

My phone, I said, my voice scratchy. I cleared it quickly. I lost my phone last weekend. Um, do you have it?

Lucas jumped off the stage and perched on the edge, arms folded across his chest. He wore a t-shirt promoting some band I hadn’t heard of with its sleeves ripped off.

Ah, your phone, he smirked. How did you manage all week without it?

The hint of an accent lifted his voice driving my desire absolutely crazy. I wasn’t sure where it was from – possibly Australia – but it only added to his allure.

I got by, I mumbled. So, do you have it?

Tugging on my ponytail, he winked. You look absolutely adorable and deliciously mouthwatering all at once. I thought my heart was going to fly out of my chest. I had to remind myself to inhale, exhale. Inhale, exhale. He leaned closer and my eyes fluttered shut. I have your phone, love. I’ll give it to you after the show.

I, um, wasn’t really planning on staying, I mumbled feebly as I opened my eyes and gazed into his. They were brown, yes, but with flecks of green. Unusual. I couldn’t look away.

That just hurts my feelings, he said in a teasing tone. I thought you were a fan.

I wanted him to kiss me in the worst way. Dustin was a million miles away from my head and Lucas was right there. And I wanted him to kiss me. I’ll stay. I guess I’ll have to.

He laughed as he yanked me into a hug. It’s in my bag in the back, he whispered in my ear. Once we’re done, I’ll get it for you.

Thanks, I said. I’ll, um, let you finish.

Sure, he said as he released me. I’ll see you after the show.

I nodded again before somehow making my way back to the table without tripping or knocking someone over. I plopped into my chair and watched Lucas finish setting up while my friends watched me.

Well? Morgan prodded. What did he say?

He has my phone but it’s in his bag in the back. He’ll give it to me after the show.

Bailey’s heavily-made up eyes narrowed as her ruby red lips curled in a smirk. Oh, I’m betting he will.

I glanced at her, confused, until she waggled her eyebrows. Her double meaning hit me like a brick, making me blush from the roots of my hair to my toes. My heart flopped, hoping she was right.

As I watched the show, I kept the drinking to a very minimum. I didn’t need alcohol fogging my brain when I dealt with Lucas. I wanted to have a clear head so I could get my phone and just leave.

I appreciated rock music the more I watched Lucas play. He was extremely gifted with his guitar and thoroughly enjoyed himself on stage. He and his band mate – the one who lived in the apartment above the bar – laughed as they strummed in time with each other and it made my heart spin.

And when he sang, his voice so sweet yet rough and his lips ever so close to the microphone, shivers of lust crept up my spine. I fought them off before my friends could notice but I was almost certain Bailey caught one or two – especially when a knowing smirk appeared on her face.

When they finished, I waited for the crowd to disperse before approaching him. His hair, as well as his t-shirt, was damp with sweat but his dancing eyes were lively and bright.

Did you enjoy the show, love? he asked as he extended a hand to help me on stage.

Yes, it was great. You guys are great.

The other guitarist snorted and chuckled. Don’t they sell thesauruses in that college bookstore of yours? If they do, you should purchase one.

A tiny smile cracked my lips as I rolled my eyes. Okay, you guys were outstandingly fantastic and you sounded phenomenal. I lifted a brow. Better?

Laughing, the guitarist extended a hand. Much, thanks. I’m Spencer Kelly, by the way. You must be Irelyn.

I blinked rapidly, wondering how he knew my name. I never thought Lucas would say a word about us unless it was to brag. I narrowed my eyes at Lucas as I shook Spencer’s hand. I didn’t think you remembered my name.

Lucas narrowed his eyes back as a tiny smile flitted across his face. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and placed his mouth close to my ear. Of course I did, love. I always remember the names I moan out in pleasure.

Lust flamed in my stomach as my heart performed intricate jumps and flips. The hair on the back of my neck stood straight up and goose bumps jumped out on my flesh. So much for not dressing sleazy – he wanted me no matter what.

And I was thrilled.

Um, can I have my phone now? I asked.

You know, if you wouldn’t have sneaked out on me in the middle of the night, you would have never lost it, he said.

If I wouldn’t have slept with you in the first place, I never would have lost it, I countered.

Touché, he grinned as he slid his hand down my arm and tangled our fingers together. Your phone is at my place. Come with me and we’ll get it.

I wriggled my hand, trying to wrench it loose, but he only held it tighter. I thought you said it was in the back.

He lifted a shoulder, amused by my struggles. Maybe it is.

Then maybe you should give it to me, I retorted.

Maybe I will, he sneered, dragging me off the stage, toward a storage room. Maybe I’ll just give it to you here, he said as he towed me in the room and shut the door. He released my hand as I stepped back. He inched forward, lust in his eyes. I haven’t thought of anything but you all week.

I froze, my mouth wide open. Wasn’t I just some…some girl? Someone to sleep with? I…

You, what, Irelyn? Did you think of me? Did you close your eyes and remember how amazing our bodies were together? I nodded as my eyelids fluttered shut. His hands gently gripped my hips and eased me closer as his lips found the side of my face. Did your week drag slowly as you anticipated getting together again tonight? Did you ache to have me again?

The stench of dirty mop water lingered in the air as I imagined us writhing on the filthy floor. A shudder wracked my body and not in a good way. I stepped back, eyes wide. Not here, Lucas, please, I begged. I didn’t want to be that cheap.

He cupped my cheek, his eyes glazed in desire. I wouldn’t think of it, love. I’ll take you home. With me. He kissed me. You game?

I was game for anything except rolling around on the dirty floor. Of course, I was quite positive that he could convince me if he was inclined. Yes.

He kissed me again before bending to pick up a rucksack. He opened a pocket and produced my phone. He dropped it in my shaky hand, smirking the entire time. Put it where you won’t lose it. After you call your friends and tell them not to wait for you.

I gaped at him, hardly hearing his words. He pushed the phone at me and I quickly flipped it open, finding Bailey’s number. She answered immediately.

I see you got your phone back, she said, a definite smirk in her voice. What did you have to do to get it?

Nothing, I snapped. Lucas raised a brow and traced my jaw with his mouth. Um, nothing. Um, don’t wait for me, okay? I’ll be home later.

Tomorrow, Lucas murmured against my skin. I’ll take you home this time.

I heard that, Bailey said. See you then!

I snapped my phone shut, shoved it in my bag, and snaked my arms around Lucas’s neck. His lips kissed their way up my throat, to my mouth. I groaned in his mouth and melted against him. I ran a hand down his chest to wiggle it under his t-shirt but he stopped me before I could rip it off.

My place, love, remember? he said between kisses. Let’s go.

He released my body reluctantly to take my hand. When he opened the door, he cursed. Damn it!

What? I asked huskily, still recovering from his kisses. What’s the matter?

Smiling at me, he squeezed my hand. Nothing. Wait here – I have to get my guitar. If I leave it again, Collin will be pissed.

Nodding, I watched as he sprinted down the hall. I leaned against the wall, hoping that no one would come down there and question what I was doing. I didn’t know how to explain that I was Lucas’s love toy, waiting for him to take me home to have his way with me.

He returned about five minutes later, rucksack over his shoulder and guitar case in hand. He stretched out his free hand for me to take, my heart rumbling. He led me out of the back of the building to his truck. He tossed his things in the back and bit his lip.

Where the hell are my manners, he said as he pushed a button on his keychain to unlock the locks and then opened my door. Ladies first and all that.

I smiled a little as I climbed inside. He hurriedly got in on his side and started the engine. The squalling radio made me jump, hand to my chest. He pushed a button to shut it off, apologetic grin on his face. Sorry, love, I forgot.