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    Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World
    Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World
    Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World
    Ebook51 pages39 minutes

    Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World

    By Ken La Salle

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    About this ebook

    Are the voices in your head listening to you? Oh yes. Yes, they are listening to you. They know what you’re saying. Sometimes, they talk back. Sometimes, they sing along. Sometimes, they write children’s book with hidden messages placed in plain sight with a neon bow because, hey, a little style never hurt anyone. (This, of course, ignores the Great Style Massacre of 1973.)
    Welcome to “Fun To Grow On” – the new children’s book series for adults. These books are not for little children or big babies. Each story is filled with blood and violence, sex and swearing – Seriously. This series is for adults. These are not parodies of children’s books but original stories for adults who still have a lot to learn... as do we all. “Fun To Grow On” presents the very first book in the series... Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World!
    When a cookie gets herpes, he decides to ask God for a cure. Can he find God in time?
    Someone fed a chocolate chip cookie equal parts of blinding self-awareness, cranberry vodka, and shrooms and asked him to tell his story. Here it is, with all the pageantry you would expect from a cookie... which is probably a whole lot less than you would desire.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherKen La Salle
    Release dateMar 19, 2015
    ISBN9781311209177
    Author

    Ken La Salle

    Author and Playwright, Ken La Salle grew up in Santa Ana, California and has remained in the surrounding area his entire life. He was raised with strong, blue collar roots, which have given him a progressive and environmentalist view. As a result, you'll find many of his stories touching those areas both geographically and philosophically. His plays have been seen in theaters across the country and you can find a growing number of books available online. Find out more about Ken on his website at www.kenlasalle.com.

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      Book preview

      Cookies - Ken La Salle

      Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World

      Ken La Salle

      Smashwords Edition

      Copyright 2015 Ken La Salle

      Discover other titles by Ken La Salle at Smashwords.com

      Smashwords Edition, License Notes

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      FUN TO GROW ON BOOKS presents

      Cookies:

      Sluts of the Snack World

      by Ken La Salle

      With Special Thanks to:

      Vicky and Evelyn for their help

      Ashley Nicole Stark for her terrific cover art

      And Josh Woodward for his music Good To Go

      Disclaimer

      Fun To Grow On Books is a series of children’s books written for adults. This is not to say that these books are childish or that they are in any way child-like. Each book is a self-contained story, written in the fashion of a child’s book, with the intent of teaching some lucky adult somewhere a lesson he or she or it, whatever the case may be, has either not been fortunate enough to learn thus far, is fortunate enough to learn just now, or actually might not have to learn because it might not apply to them or they may in some way not really fit in the…

      What was I talking about?

      Oh. Right.

      Most adults have no idea what they’re doing. The rest are criminally deluded.

      Each Fun To Grow On Book is meant to be taken very seriously, but not so seriously that you’re considering just how much ammunition you might need. At that point, this is all just a lark. A big joke. Funny, huh?

      Now, on with the story…

      Chapter 1

      When you look at a chocolate chip cookie, what you are actually looking at is a cookie with herpes. No kidding. Chocolate chip cookies start out as regular sugar cookies but then they have sex with – you guessed it – another cookie who has herpes, which you probably also call a chocolate chip cookie.

      The reason I tell you this is to share with you the fact that I have herpes. That’s right. If you eat me, my guess is that you’ll get herpes as well. And this will transmit on and on and on. Do you realize that every time you give a child a chocolate chip cookie, you are giving a dose of herpes? Maybe it’s your grand-daughter. Maybe it’s just some kid on the street – and why you’re offering chocolate chip cookies to children on the street is just not something I wish to entertain at this point – but you are giving that kid herpes.

      I hope you feel really good about yourself.

      Mind you, I don’t know if cookie herpes is communicable

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