New Dreams: The 3 Keys To Getting the Desires of your Heart
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New Dreams - Patricia Sawyer
Together
INTRODUCTION
Ishut off the television and tried to comprehend what had just happened. The program was one I had been watching for many months. I marveled at how the Christian psychologist answered his viewers’ letters and used the Word of God so mightily to solve their problems. As his deep resonant voice came from the screen, relaying a message of hope to the letter writer, I sensed the Lord’s voice.
His words were impressed on my mind as unmistakably as the psychologist’s words were impressed on the airways.
I want you to go back to school to get a psychology degree. Like this man, I want you to help people.
His message was clear and to the point. My response was the same. I can’t go back to school, Lord. I’m fifty years old. I have only a high school education, and you know I’ve never been much of a scholar.
My mind darted from one aspect of collegiate activity to another—schedules, term papers, and exams. Just the thought overwhelmed me. Negotiating the demands of such a curriculum, I deemed to be way out of my element.
Lord, I’m not college material.
I’ve never wanted to go to college, much less earn an advanced degree. I had been a real estate broker for fifteen years; that was challenging enough for me. Getting such a degree was as lofty and unthinkable as leading the Israelites out of Egypt must have seemed to Moses. Sure, Moses did lead his people out of Egypt, but that was Moses. This is me!
Is it really you, God?
My heart started pounding. After all, I didn’t hear an audible voice, nor did my television burst into flames. I had had leadings from the Lord before, but they were instructions I knew were achievable, such as Move to a different real estate firm,
Give five hundred dollars to a needy friend,
or Restore a broken relationship.
Those directions were in the range of possibility. But this?
Every muscle in my body tightened with resistance. I tried to convince myself I was mistaken. Surely, I misinterpreted the Lord’s leading or perhaps it wasn’t the Lord at all. What God was asking of me was not only bizarre, but it was impossible.
Busying myself about the house, I attempted to put the strange message out of my thoughts. The effort was futile.
My heart continued to pound, and I went back to the chair where God had spoken to me and began to pray for understanding. I felt like Moses must have felt at the burning bush. After a brief time, my body began to relax. Then, suddenly amused, I looked up at the blank television screen and smiled at the thought of explaining a college plan to my husband. I was certain he’d laugh at the proposal.
That would be my out, wouldn’t it?
The sound of my pacified voice echoed in my ears, as I realized that that would settle the whole matter. My husband needed to approve! I was comforted knowing that, of course, I couldn’t move forward with such a plan without his cooperation. I hung on to that loophole with relish.
Anxious to get this conundrum resolved, I laid out my proposed intentions to my husband after dinner several evenings later. I was prepared for whatever direction the pronouncement would take. He listened with interest. I waited for a smirk and an are you crazy?
response. It didn’t come. Instead, he simply shrugged his shoulders. It sounds all right to me.
What!
My eyes locked on his. I was befuddled by his quick, unquestioning reply. You do realize I’m talking about years here—a lot of years. This will mean a drastic career change.
He sipped his coffee, smiled, and then calmly assured me that he understood.
You don’t think I’m too old?
I don’t think so,
he said, laughing. His eyes seemed to twinkle as though he was pleased that I valued his opinion. You can handle it, if it’s what you want to do.
What about my job?
The words sputtered out as I realized I had been holding my breath.
My husband gazed at me intently for a long moment. We do need your income, especially with the added college expense.
He rubbed his chin and arched his brows. I guess you could work part-time and go to school part-time?
He was flat-out serious. There was no sarcasm in his voice, not a flicker of jest in his eyes.
I guess… I could.
I said, dubiously.
He was uncharacteristically accepting, overriding my every objection. Why was this going so smoothly? Had God prepared him? Of course He had. There was no other explanation.
Slowly God was giving me the confidence to believe that the mother of four grown children and grandmother of five was a viable candidate for a highly advanced degree, even if she was half-a-century old. My husband’s positive attitude convinced me, and I began to get excited about the whole idea.
My new life of advanced education began as I registered a few months later at South Suburban College in South Holland, Illinois, the local community college. I didn’t see anyone my age, but there were many returning adult students. Some I met were stay-at-home moms seeking careers in nursing or computers. With their children all in school, they now could find time for themselves. Others were working men and women who wanted better jobs and were planning on attending part-time, as I was.
The staff was cooperative and patient, taking some of the apprehension out of my initial venture into the halls of higher learning. After signing up for my prerequisite classes for the field of psychology, I was told I was eligible for a grant that would pay for my tuition and books. What an unexpected blessing!
What’s more, I lost no income by working part-time. Somehow, I managed to list and sell as many houses as I did when I worked full-time. It was amazing. I praised and thanked God for His provision.
There indeed was so much to thank Him for. I did well academically—struggling with some courses, breezing through others, while maintaining a strong grade point average. More blessings took place when I moved on to the University of Illinois in Chicago, where I began attending full-time for my final three years.
I discovered tuition waivers were waiting for me; I needed only to apply. And how memorable was orientation day where I met three women on the same academic track as me. Together we formed a study group that stayed together until graduation. I don’t think I would have made it through either Statistics or Research without their help.
God was faithful through what I thought would be a considerable struggle. His word sustained me. His mercy and grace paved the way for a smooth, exciting experience. Though the work was not easy, I loved the challenge of it, especially knowing there was always someone available to help