Night of the Squirrels: Day of the Robots
By Rachel Smith
()
About this ebook
It all started with one bite.
The experiments of McWikken Academy are restless. First, it was Lars the former student turned mostly robot attacking Regan. Now, one little hunchbacked squirrel takes down half the basketball team and several cheerleaders – not to mention the opposing team and some of the audience – before some very familiar men in masks show up to burn down the gym and usher the students to the infirmary.
Regan looks for solutions from her intern on the inside, Colby, and finds that the original mission of the McWikken underground lab is very family-oriented, their contingency plans are much more brutal than she thought possible...and she has been tangling with Nurse Dash for far longer than she realized. She goes into hiding, takes on the responsibilities of a field jacket, retains the services of a school librarian with a serious grudge, and rallies her best human and werewolf friends to resist the oncoming explosion of furry mutilation. If she can just montage and stay hidden long enough to figure out how to get past the shiny metal staff, she might have a chance to stop the squirrelpocalypse and still get to the dance celebrating the new gym – but who will she go with?
(Volume 2 of the Night of the Squirrels/Squirrelpocalypse trilogy, following Dawn of the Interns)
Rachel Smith
Rachel Smith is a Queer cartoonist living on the unceded territory of the Mi’kmaq and Wolastoqiyik (Maliseet) Peoples (Cambridge, Nova Scotia). They’ve had illustrations and comics published in anthologies from Cloudscape Comics and Vagabond Comics, among others. They are also the creator of the autobiocomic Skull and the cozy forest fantasy comic Pog & Zella. Rachel has a certificate in Comics & Graphic Novels from Camosun College.
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Night of the Squirrels - Rachel Smith
Night of the Squirrels:
Day of the Robots
Rachel Smith
Duncan Hills First Edition 2013
Call of the Merricat Second Edition 2015, Distributed by Smashwords
Copyright 2015 Rachel E. Smith
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this ebook with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to any persons living or dead is entirely coincidental and unintentional. All references to public figures, historical events, and popular culture entities are done with love and respect.
For herds past and present, everything is always for the herd.
****
Table of Contents
Chapter One – Bang!
Chapter Two – D.R.U.G.S.
Chapter Three – Underdog
Chapter Four – Incubation
Chapter Five – A Means to an End
Chapter Six – Subterraneans
Chapter Seven – You Keep Me Hangin' On
Chapter Eight – It's Gonna Be a Long Night
Chapter Nine – Where Did All the Love Go
Chapter Ten – Give Him a Great Big Kiss
Chapter Eleven – Deep in the Woods
Chapter Twelve – Sistinas
Chapter Thirteen – Be My Wife
Chapter Fourteen – Retrovertigo
Chapter Fifteen – Ice Age
Chapter Sixteen – Bastards of Young
Chapter Seventeen – I Think That I Would Die
Chapter Eighteen – Egyptian Cowboy
Chapter Nineteen – Shiftless When Idle
Chapter Twenty – Heart of Stone
Chapter Twenty-One – Running Up That Hill
Chapter Twenty-Two – Simulated Love
Chapter Twenty-Three – Are You Man Enough?
Chapter Twenty-Four – River Styx
Chapter Twenty-Five – Worm Tamer
Chapter Twenty-Six – I'm the One
Chapter Twenty-Seven – Walkin' with the Beast
Chapter Twenty-Eight – Cat People
Chapter Twenty-Nine – Dog Eat Dog
Chapter Thirty – I Wish This Song Was Louder
Slightly More
Bang!
It all started with one bite.
At first Regan was thinking What is that weird scraggly thing on the gym floor?
and then it bit through Betty Ravenwood’s tendon and she went down, followed by the rest of the pyramid. Only Babette landed on her feet.
As the cheerleaders struggled to separate themselves from the pile Regan watched Babette sniff the air.
Werewolves,
she muttered to Kaye Winkel. What the hell does she smell?
The rat on the floor?
You know, I think it might actually be a squirrel. It’s too furry to be a rat.
What, does having one eye give you hawk vision or something? Are you the Beastmaster seeing through Babette’s eyes?
Nope.
Regan stared at the furry little beast.
What is going on?
Kaye squinted.
The squirrel was weaving quickly over the gym floor. The basketball teams and cheerleaders were scuttling away, trying not to be touched by the squirrel.
It’s got red eyes!
McWikken forward, Max Goodlove, was yelling and pointing.
The squirrel seemed to take offense to this statement and skittered up Max’s leg. He jerked and shook trying to dislodge it but the squirrel succeeded at sinking its teeth into the back of his neck. Max fell face first onto the floor. The squirrel sprang onto the nearest person, cheerleader Reney Mayford. She’d been close to the top of the pyramid and taken a hard fall onto her elbow when it collapsed. The squirrel ripped a long line of flesh from her forearm before she managed to fight it off.
What’s Betty doing?
Kaye pointed at the first bite victim.
Betty Ravenwood was staggering to her feet, her slit tendon causing her ankle to buckle underneath her until she accepted it and started crawling towards the opposing team’s bleachers.
Where are the referees? Other authority figures?
Kaye asked.
Regan could see one referee was helping sort out the pyramid. She spotted Headmaster Henson fleeing from the gym, followed closely by Secretary Tom.
Deserters.
Betty’s got hold of that McGillicuddy player guy!
Kaye put her hand over her mouth.
I’m so glad we’re really informed about this game.
Regan sighed.
Betty grabbed the boy’s calf and was pulling it towards her mouth. The player was watching the other cheerleaders stumble around and didn’t notice until Betty gouged out a chunk of his leg and began to chew.
The player screeched and passed out cold. Betty continued to gnaw on his shin.
Regan and Kaye looked at each other with dead set eyes.
Babette vaulted over the munching Betty and fleeing audience to the bleacher in front of Kaye and Regan and met their stares.
Zombie apocalypse,
all three said.
Who knew it would be caused by a squirrel?
Regan shrugged.
I’m not surprised,
Kaye said.
Their heads shot back as the sporty rocking sounds of Gary Glitter erupted from the PA system.
Are they trying to distract us from the zombie apocalypse?
Regan glanced back to the chaotic gym floor. The player Betty had bitten reanimated and bit another player. At least one. Several McGillicuddy players were ripping the limbs off a McGillicuddy cheerleader with their mouths. Somehow Do You Want to Touch Me There
seemed like just the right and the most hideously wrong song for the moment.
The McWikken players were mostly unharmed beyond a few bites and scratches as far as Regan could tell. Perhaps it was home court advantage. She could see Max was heading for the locker room with several other Hedgehog players; she recognized Alejandro DeMarco and Layne Erstwhile.
Faith Ripken was leading the bleeding Reney out the front door with the help of Lucy Murray and Darla Dietrich. Regan couldn’t see any blood on Darla, Lucy, or Faith.
One of the zombified McGillicuddy cheerleaders made a break up the bleachers for Katrina Sherman and Van Shepard as they were climbing. Regan saw her scratch Katrina’s calf before Van kicked her in the face and sent her back down with a series of sickening cracks. Her head was no longer straight on her neck when she landed.
This is Headmaster Henson! Please evacuate the gym if you haven’t already! The fire exits are well marked!
cut through Gary Glitter over the PA.
Maybe we should leave.
Regan noticed a freshly faceless McGillicuddy parent eying her.
Faith’s out, most of ours are out. Yeah, maybe we shouldn’t trap ourselves in a gym full of zombies,
Babette said. Follow me.
She cut a path through the swarm, cracking live and undead people on the chins indiscriminately until they reached the closest fire exit. Regan and Kaye huddled and swatted behind her. Having a strong, supernatural creature for a friend was proving useful.
Regan almost felt like thanking her for hesitating before taking the wolfsbane pills they made to keep her from wanting to eat everyone; it certainly would have cut down her instant neck-breaking abilities.
Before Babette could open the door it was kicked in from the outside by three people in gas masks with flame throwers. The girls hesitated.
The three entered the gym; the last one gestured for them to exit and nodded at Regan and Babette.
Colby. Regan nodded back.
The girls found Faith and the others outside and watched as the gymnasium burned to the ground. Just before the front wall collapsed the PA cut off and Gary Glitter stopped asking if they wanted to touch him there and howled into oblivion. It felt fitting.
I wonder if the flame thrower guys got out,
Faith said. I saw them go in but I didn’t see anyone come out.
They’re always like that.
Regan stared into the smoke. Interns.
The gym imploded in a burst of ashen dust. Regan saw Mr. Hopper come out of a cloud of smoke with his arms open. He was saying something she couldn’t make out yet.
I don’t want to go to the infirmary. I’m fine,
Babette huffed.
He might just mean us human-folk, you know,
Kaye said.
He’s telling us to go to the infirmary?
That was the last place Regan wanted to go.
Mr. Hopper reached the group of girls, spouting instructions to head to the infirmary, not to their rooms, to the infirmary.
Let’s go!
he said, still waving his arms. I want to see one line, one long line of students walking to the infirmary.
The girls joined the herd moving towards Wilde Hall, reluctantly trudging behind Faith and Reney.
When they finally got close to the door there was a blonde nurse calling out more instructions.
If you have been bitten you need to join the line on the right! If you are not sure, stay in the line on the left! If you were on the gym floor, as in basketball team members and cheerleaders, you need to join the line on the right regardless of whether or not you’ve been bitten!
It’s like they’ve seen mass student destruction before. Geez,
Regan mumbled. She was sure they had.
Regan watched Faith and Reney shuffle to the right line.
Like good little cattle, she thought.
Babette sighed and moved to the right line as well. Almost immediately a blonde twitchy guy appeared and pulled Babette aside. She didn’t flinch.
She must know him, he must be one of her and Louis’ wranglers or something, Regan nodded to herself.
Coming through!
a voice came from behind Regan.
There was someone pushing a gurney behind her, it was covered with a sheet. The gurney stopped next to the blonde twitchy guy and Babette. Regan overheard him say, This gurney is full of pieces.
The blonde guy grimaced and said, Morgue then. Take it to the morgue.
He and Babette followed the gurney onto the hospital elevator. The doors closed and Regan wondered if Babette would come back the same girl, well, the same werewolf girl.
She and Kaye moved closer to the doors, they could see more of what was happening inside. Regan could see Layne Erstwhile receiving an injection of some sort and Reney’s stomach being bandaged by Nurse Dash.
There were a lot of instructors present, handing out gauze and ushering the students to the makeshift examination tables. Even the librarian, Mr. Yorke, was handing spools of bandage tape to Nurse Dash. Mr. Yorke was scowling at Nurse Dash, Regan noticed. A straight scowl, there was no mistaking the clenched teeth and the hard slits of his eyes. What was happening there?
Where were Jenkins and Colby? Regan wanted to ask them about what was really going on. They could still be burning zombies in the gym, taking care of the evidence so to speak. Maybe Colby would knock on her window again or find her; he could be up here examining students, maybe she could work the line just right so he’d examine her. She wouldn’t feel safe in this building otherwise. Regan was happy Sam wasn’t here.
Kaye, do you see Colby or Jenkins anywhere?
No. But I also don’t see anyone being examined for very long so now I’m just wondering what the injections are.
They’ll tell us it's vitamins.
And we’ll never believe them.
Kaye cocked her head to the side. We should ditch.
Don’t you think they’ll notice? Hopper saw us.
Yeah, but Mr. Hopper is not a nurse.
He is standing right over there.
Regan pointed.
Regan! Now I looked and he looked at me.
Kaye started hacking and leaned down, putting her hands on her knees.
I guess you need something for your cough.
Or Mr. Hopper has mind control powers.
Regan began coughing.
It’s the mind control one.
Regan put her hand on Kaye’s shoulder and they hacked together, finally spitting up some black viscous fluid onto the sidewalk.
Mr. Yorke appeared with paper cups and towels.
If we’re ‘going to spew, spew into this?’
Regan asked.
Mr. Yorke nodded and moved along the line behind them.
Gross.
Kaye looked into the cup.
It’s still empty.
Yes, but I’ve never looked forward to carrying around something I’ve hacked up.
Oh, I have.
I’m not surprised, MacNeill.
Regan glared at Kaye as she was pulled away by a nurse. It wasn’t long before Regan was pulled in and instructed to sit down and roll up her sleeves and the hems of her jeans.
Name, please?
the blonde nurse who’d been shouting instructions asked.
Regan MacNeill, I mean, Krieger.
Which do you mean? For instance, you can call me Nurse Juliet, without a last name.
My last name is Krieger.
Regan decided she didn’t like Nurse Juliet.
Year?
Junior.
Regan was tempted to snarkily state what year it was and claim she didn’t understand the question, but she also wanted to leave.
Were you bitten?
No.
Do you feel any rawness in your throat, any difficulty breathing?
Yes. But I didn’t notice it until a minute ago.
All right. I’m just going to check your vitals and we’ll see what we can do about your breathing problems.
The rest of the check up seemed to run a normal route: lights in her ears, tongue depressor, and finally a prescription for an inhaler with mild medicine to help her little alveoli get back to working order.
Regan hopped off the examination table and headed down the hall toward the dispensary, hoping to catch Kaye or Babette or a glimpse of Colby and Jenkins. There were still a few students milling around, looking distracted and annoyed.
This seemed far too orderly, too normal. There was no sense of the unusual about the McWikken infirmary staff’s response to the gym burning down. It was a disaster. Students were lost, zombies were viewed, a weird squirrel was there, and yet it felt like business as usual, an almost blasé attitude was taken to the disaster. Even she felt bored with it and it had only happened an hour earlier. Her friends were okay, or as okay as they could be considering how this academy ran, that was all she knew so far. Colby and Jenkins could put it in perspective for her; let her know who was dead and who wasn’t and what had really happened. Up here in this sterile building, she would learn nothing and felt like she couldn’t really care either.
She joined the line at the dispensary, noticing Eleni Bryton and Hallie Harker ahead of her. Ugh. Regan lowered her head. Maybe they wouldn’t notice her and she wouldn’t have to hear any of her nicknames. Or maybe Kaye would show up and they could ignore them together. She heard shifting stances, a murmuring that included her name. Crap.
Hey, is that Patches I see behind us?
Eleni asked in exaggerated tones meant for Regan to hear.
I think it is,
Hallie said. I wonder what she’s doing here?
You know, I wonder too- I didn’t think the pharmacy gave out glass eyes.
Regan looked up. Glass eyes? Glass eyes?
Excuse me,
she said.
I said, ‘I didn’t think the pharmacy gave out glass eyes,’ Patches.
Eleni repeated.
I heard you. Quit it.
Regan’s tone was firm.
Quit what? We were simply having a conversation. It really had nothing to do with you.
Eleni winked at Regan and handed her prescription to the pharmacist.
Oh no, Eleni, I’m sure you discuss the fact that I’m behind you and glass eyes on a regular basis.
What, Patches? Are you still talking to me? I didn’t think we were friends, I had no idea you wanted my attention so badly.
Red was spiraling to Regan’s cheeks, but she couldn’t let Eleni and Hallie see. She hated how any attempt to defend yourself was turned against you. The mark of a true bitch. Everything’s about her and you’re the flustered one and she’s being horrible but it doesn’t matter because she’s now somehow made it clear that you want her attention. She was right, it was never about Regan.
Eleni collected a small, white bag from the pharmacist and started snickering and glancing at Regan.
She would not be baited this time. Regan turned her body so that she couldn’t see Eleni and spotted Kaye coming down the hall. She waved and Kaye skipped toward her.
Hey, Babette’s totally gone,
Kaye said.
The actual bitch. So I hear.
They heard Hallie smirk.
Kaye rolled her eyes and went on, And all the other cheerleaders have to stay overnight for observation, even if they weren’t bitten.
But not Babette?
She’s not with them.
How do you know?
I went down the wrong hallway and heard the nurses talking.
She and Regan high-fived.
Maybe you should put up lost dog posters around campus,
Eleni said a little too loudly.
Um, Eleni, are you trying to get our attention? You really don’t have to speak so loudly. I can hear you.
Regan half-smiled at her and raised the eyebrow above her patch.
***
D.R.U.G.S.
The next morning an alert over the campus-wide emergency PA shattered the silence. Regan sat straight up and blinked a few times, trying to decide if that noise had been real.
Students and staff of McWikken Academy, there will be no classes today. We will be having a mandatory assembly to memorialize the Irving Gymnasium disaster today at one PM. Mandatory. It is mandatory. One PM.
Headmaster Henson’s voice filled the air.
I’m not sure if I have to go to that,
Regan muttered. Headmaster Henson was not known for brevity.
The alert sounded again and the exact same announcement followed.
Regan couldn’t believe they had actually recorded him saying mandatory
that many times.
She got out of bed and stretched and started hacking up black fluid. Regan ran down the hall to the bathroom and spit up in the sink. She rinsed her mouth and wiped her face with water. Regan stared at herself in the mirror and realized she had not put her patch on; she hadn’t seen the space where her eye had been for quite some time. Regan didn’t like to see it, the way it revealed the mistakes of her surgeon, the scar. It was like something out of a horror movie, not a regular part of life. She covered her eye with her hand and walked back to her room, whipped her black plaid patch over her head, and reached for her inhaler.
After dressing she decided to head over to Sam’s room and see if he was back from breakfast. Regan never went to breakfast. Lunch and dinner were depressing enough at McWikken without adding a third meal in a room full of people staring at her. And now that Eleni had seen her again the taunts would be back. She would need to overcome the pharmacy incident.
Mrs. Griffin was still hiding behind her magazine at the Ocampo Hall desk, this time it was Taste of Home. Regan headed up the stairs and knocked on Sam’s door. Schad answered, she was surprised he hadn’t already stationed himself in the games room with Miles and Hirsch.
Hey, Regan-dude, how are you?
I’m okay. You?
Well, I wasn’t in the gym, so I can’t complain, dude. Can’t complain.
Yeah, I guess not. Is Sam here?
Why yes, yes he is.
Schad moved aside so Regan could see Sam in his usual position, sketching away.
Thanks,
she said. She waited for Schad to move aside so she could enter. He smiled at her. She cocked her head and he stayed in place.
If Sam could speak he would have broken the awkwardness of this situation. Regan sighed.
Okay, well, I’ll leave you two dudes to it. I’ve got some typing to do.
Schad smoothed the brim of his red baseball cap and left the doorway.
Regan shook her head and flounced into Sam’s room, sitting down across from him on the bed.
Hey.
She poked him with a pencil.
Hey.
So, the gym burned down… Betty Ravenwood became a zombie, the cheerleaders are all still in observation, Kaye and I got smoke inhalation issues, and at least half the McGillicuddy team and fans are probably dead. It was a weird night.
She poked Sam again.
Really? That was weird? You don’t seem too distressed.
Sam frowned at her.
I’m not and I don’t understand why.
She rolled onto her stomach and gazed up at him. I feel like finally, it wasn’t us. It wasn’t you or me being attacked. Babette’s fine, Faith didn’t get bitten, I mean, Reney got bitten but she seemed fine. I think I’m just done being stressed about the weird crap that goes on here. It’s someone else’s turn.
Sam was squinting at her.
She reached over and poked him again.
I guess that seems strange to me. I thought you wanted to know more, at least about what happened to me, what’s happening to me. Just because nobody you really like got injured badly you don’t really care?
Maybe I’m desensitized. Do you care?
Yeah. People died in our gym yesterday. It’s horrible-
You don’t sound that affected.
Regan turned over so she was lying on her back and poked Sam over her head.
I’m just stoic. I’m affected. I’m sad and I wasn’t even there. Maybe you’re in shock.
I don’t think so. I don’t, like, think anyone deserved to die because they became a zombie in our gym, but I’m just not that bothered about it either.
Did you drink the Kool-Aid last night?
Don’t think so.
Sam regarded her and shook his head.
You know what started the whole thing? That’s what’s really weird about all of it. A squirrel. There was this weird looking squirrel and it ran into the gym and bit Betty’s achilles and then the whole thing just went wacky.
Regan rolled over again and sat up to poke Sam.
A squirrel? Wacky? That is weird. We should probably look into that.
What? We can just ask Colby later. He’ll know what was going on. It will be okay, Sam. It will all be okay.
Sam stared at Regan with his forehead tightly knit. She could tell he thought she was not herself.
She and Sam walked down to the auditorium in Gentileschi Hall together, passing the still smoldering rubble of the gym. Regan could tell that Sam wanted to say something to her about it, but she didn’t feel like hearing it so she didn’t poke him.
Inside the auditorium the surviving cheerleaders, including Babette, and the remaining players of the McWikken basketball team were on stage in folding chairs. Miss Fiona Lamb directed Regan and Sam to