Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

My Man Jeeves
My Man Jeeves
My Man Jeeves
Ebook192 pages3 hours

My Man Jeeves

Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

4/5

()

Read preview

About this ebook

My Man Jeeves is a collection of short stories by P. G. Wodehouse, first published in the UK in May 1919 by George Newnes. Of the eight stories in the collection, half feature the popular characters Jeeves and Bertie Wooster, while the others concern Reggie Pepper, an early prototype for Wooster.

LanguageEnglish
PublisherBooklassic
Release dateJun 18, 2015
ISBN9789635244874
Author

P. G. Wodehouse

P.G. Wodehouse (1881-1975) nació en Surrey. Tras trabajar un tiempo como periodista en Inglaterra, se trasladó a los Estados Unidos. Escribió numerosas obras de teatro y comedias musicales, y más de noventa novelas. Creador de personajes inolvidables -Jeeves, Bertie Wooster, su tía Agatha, Ukridge, Psmith, Lord Emsworth, los lechuguinos del Club de los Zánganos, y tantos otros, sus obras se reeditan continuamente, como corresponde a uno de los grandes humoristas del siglo.

Read more from P. G. Wodehouse

Related to My Man Jeeves

Related ebooks

Humor & Satire For You

View More

Related articles

Related categories

Reviews for My Man Jeeves

Rating: 3.7907323701046334 out of 5 stars
4/5

669 ratings41 reviews

What did you think?

Tap to rate

Review must be at least 10 words

  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    3.25 starsJeeves is the "personal gentleman" to Bertie Wooster. Bertie believes that Jeeves is always right, and Jeeves does seem to have a knack for coming up with great ideas for getting out of sticky situations.This appears to be more anecdotes than one story. I listened on audio, and somehow managed to miss a lot of transitions from one story to the next, and a lot of the stories didn't necessarily seem to focus on Bertie and Jeeves (or how they fit into them, I missed!). There were humorous bits. Overall, it was o.k. (3 stars), but I'm adding an extra .25 stars for the great narrator.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    There are two ways to review any Wodehouse book--in absolute terms, and in comparison to the rest of output. Although My Man Jeeves doesn't quite measure up to some of the later Wooster/Jeeves pairings, it was still funnier and more engaging than much of the humor of today.This is not where I'd recommend starting an exploration of Wodehouse's writing, but long time fans will find much of interest, especially the Reggie Pepper stories, some of which were later reworked to feature Wooster. In fact, Reggie Pepper was something of a proto-Bertie, lacking only the addition of Jeeves, that deus ex machina of a valet, to create a winning formula.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    My Man Jeeves is the first of the short story collections about Bertie Wooster and his man, as it were, Jeeves. Having read a couple of the short stories I thought they seemed very familiar. I resorted to the back cover of the book which informed me that this book contains drafts of stories later re-written for other collections, which would explain that. The book also contains some stories about Reggie Pepper, who the back cover insists is an earlier version of Bertie. The slight change in style between the stories of the two characters is refreshing for a few pages, but the Reggie Pepper stories lack the charm held by the Bertie Wooster stories. With Bertie I always find myself wanting everything to turn out all right. With Reggie I found myself not caring either way.The Jeeves and Wooster stories themselves are entertaining as always, though a little straightforward by the standard set elsewhere. This book doesn't do justice to quite how good Jeeves and Wooster can be, and should therefore probably be avoided by anyone who has yet to form a first impression. It's still entertaining though, and a quick enough read to be worth it.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    My Man Jeeves is a collection of eight stories, four of them featuring Bertie Wooster and his capable manservant Jeeves. The language can be a bit annoying at times (chappies, rummy, ending sentences with what and so on), but they are still funny. All the stories have unexpected resolutions. The other four stories have other characters.

    LEAVE IT TO JEEVES tells about Jeeves helping Berties's friend in a way he didn't expect. It also shows how much and why Bertie Wooster respects his manservant.

    "From now on consider yourself the brains of the establishment."
    "Very good, sir. I shall endeavour to give satisfaction."
    And he has, by Jove! I'm a bit short on brain myself; the old bean would appear to have been constructed more for ornament than for use, don't you know..."

    So when his friend comes asking for help and advice, Bertie leaves it to Jeeves.

    JEEVES AND THE UNBIDDEN GUEST - Even if he has decided to avoid his aunt Agatha and stay in New York, he was saddled with aunt's friend's son as a guest. In front of his mother he is a quiet young man, but as soon as she leaves for a few weeks, he gets wild. As always, Bertie needs Jeeves to save him. Only this time, Jeeves is sort of mad at him because of his pink tie.

    JEEVES AND THE HARD-BOILED EGG is another story where Jeeves helps Bertie's friend. This time there is a disagreement between Bertie and Jeeves about Bertie's moustages.

    "... while there's no doubt that in certain matters of dress Jeeves's judgement is absolutely sound and should be followed, it seemed to me that it was getting a bit too thick if he was going to edit my face as well as my costume."

    This time a friend's problem is his miser uncle who expects him to be a successful rancher in Colorado.

    ABSENT TREATMENT is not a Wooster and Jeeves story. It is told by Reggie Pepper and it is about his friend's problem with memory which caused problems in his marriage. I was annoyed by the end of it.

    HELPING FREDDIE isn't about Wooster and Jeeves either. It's about Freddie Meadowes's problem with a girl. It is told by one of his friends. As usual, a simple plan becomes something completely crazy and unexpected. The ending is kind of rushed even for a short story.

    RALLYING ROUND OLD GEORGE is another story of a friend in need. A prince has been assaulted in a dark allay and George, the narrator's friend, doesn't remember what exactly happened so he assumes he is the one who attacked him.

    DOING CLARENCE A BIT OF GOOD is a Reggie Pepper's story. He receives an invitation from a girl he was supposed to marry (she married an artist instead). He hasn't got a clue why she invited him and why she would lie in that letter about the things which might get him there faster. Clarence from the title is her husband. I really couldn't understand why he would accept what she asked from him. It was annoying until the story's twist.

    THE AUNT AND THE SLUGGARD (Jeeves and Wooster's story). Another Bertie's friend is in trouble, this time with his aunt who has decided that he should live in New York and live as it's his last day. All he should do is write her a letter once a week describing his life. The problem is Bertie's friend hates New York and is really lazy.

    "About once a month he would take three days writing a few poems; the other three hundred and twenty-nine days of the year he rested.

    I didn't really like this character. This is the only story where I wanted to hit the person asking for help. Well, until I got to the aunt in the story anyway. It seems to me that any aunt in these stories is like Bertie's Aunt Agatha. I was so mad while reading this story. The woman is horrible. All Bertie wanted is to help his friend.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This collection contains early versions of stories that were later rewritten for other collections (including Carry On, Jeeves). As such, I would not recommend it as an introduction to Jeeves and Wooster, as they are better characterised in later stories and novels. Instead, this collection should be read once you have wondered at the ease with which Wodehouse appears to write the later stories, to appreciate that there is much hard work and polishing beneath the delightful charm of the later stories.My Man Jeeves provides a fascinating insight into the creation of stories that we know so well from later versions. All the stories are set in New York, four of them featuring Jeeves and Wooster themselves (although Jeeves does not attain that omniscient stature that he later acquires); the rest concerning Reggie Pepper, who reads like an early version of Bertie, but is weaker without the foil of Jeeves to set him off. The plots are as silly as ever, but the best are the story of the Duke of Chiswick and the Birdsburg delegates (Boost for Birdsburg!), the "Kiss Tuppy" child, and Rockmetteller Todd - a quiet poet, forced by his aunt to enjoy New York nightlife, so that she can enjoy it vicariously.I must re-quote from below, as I quoted it to my son whilst reading the collection to illustrate Wodehouse's genius of humour:”She fitted into my biggest arm-chair as if it had been built round her by someone who knew they were wearing arm-chairs tight about the hips that season.” from “Jeeves and the Unbidden Guest”It is the last tale, The Aunt and the Sluggard, that feels closest to the comic perfection achieved in later stories, when Jeeves "accidentally" leaves the aunt at a revivalist meeting of Jimmy Mundy, so that the poet can return to his quiet rural life and still anticipate inheriting his aunt's wealth in due course.Not as well polished as the later tales, but still excellent and well worth reading to make you better appreciate the effort that really goes into making the later stories appear such effortless comic genius.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    It's a rainy day in Sydney, and [My Man Jeeves] was the perfect companion for a lazy afternoon on the lounge. It was full of little smiley moments, and a couple of times some laugh out loud and gotta share with my husband. However, it needs the context of the book for it to be funny and the funny snatches don't really stand up in their own. Whilst completely different genre, have the same response as I did to [[Ian Rankin]] series - enjoyed one or two books, may read more, but probably won't read the lot.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Short stories, half of which involve Jeeves. Spends some time in New York.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    I feel this writing style was unconventional at the time, it's a lot of fun, and largely a social comedy. The language can be a little awkward at time, but it's really enjoyable overall.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Enjoyed the Jeeves & Wooster short stories, but Reggie Pepper...not so much.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Funny as can be.
  • Rating: 1 out of 5 stars
    1/5
    Good grief. Had to stop after the third repetitive, soporific, and completely unfunny chapter. Imagine the most formulaic sit-com without the com, all sit. Flabbergasted at the amount of Wodehouse fans still around today, his vapid London club slang hasn't exactly aged well in a century:

    “What ho!" I said.
    "What ho!" said Motty.
    "What ho! What ho!"
    "What ho! What ho! What ho!"
    After that it seemed rather difficult to go on with the conversation.”

    And after that it seemed rather difficult to go on with the book, but I tried...
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Although I adore Bertie & Jeeves, these vignettes aren't quite as hilarious as the later Jeeves novels are.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    “After this,” I said, “not another step for me without your advice. From now on consider yourself the brains of the establishment.”“Very good, sir. I shall endeavour to give satisfaction.”And he has, by Jove! I’m a bit short on brain myself: the old bean would appear to have been constructed more for ornament than for use, don’t you know; but give me five minutes to talk the thing over with Jeeves, and I’m game to advise anyone about anything.In four of the stories in this collection, Jeeves and Wooster are living in New York because Bertie doesn't dare go back to England until his Aunt Agatha forgives him for failing to prevent his cousin Gussie marrying a chorus girl. As usual they have to get various of Bertie's friends and acquaintances out of various scrapes caused by unreasonable and overbearing relatives, and Bertie finds that American Aunts can be just as intimidating as English ones. The other four stories feature Reggie Pepper, who is considered an early prototype of the Bertie Wooster character (according to Wikipedia). These stories also involve Reggie helping his friends out of scrapes, but it's not the same without Jeeves around to supply the brain-power. Reggie does have a valet, but he only appears in one of the stories and he can't hold a candle to Jeeves.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Enjoyable introduction for me to the famous Jeeves, with his talent for getting his master and master's friend out of various messes of their own making. I knew P G Wodehouse had lived in the USA but I hadn't realised that so much of his fiction, including this work, was set there! Read this immediately after "The Coming of Bill" and discovered that some of the plot elements were common to stories in both books (same thing happens in Agatha Christie's short stories). I enjoyed this as a light and amusing read.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Let me start with the fact that My Man Jeeves is the first P.G. Wodehouse that I have read, so I cannot compare it to any other of Wodehouse’s books. This book is a collection of eight short stories of which, sadly, only four featured Wooster and Jeeves. The stories are very much based on a formula that consists of a problem arising that Wooster consults Jeeves on, Jeeves offers his idea of a solution which is followed, something always goes awry but again, Jeeves manages to straighten everything out much to the admiration and relief of Bertie Wooster.There was nothing wrong with the four stories that featured Reggie Pepper, except that although Reggie is very like Bertie Wooster, he is much more wordy and less charming. The main ingredient missing in these four stories is that Reggie Pepper doesn’t have the wonderful Jeeves to play off of.I enjoyed these stories finding them a humorous, light and comfy read. The flow of words in this book were a delight with phrases such as “perfect piffle”, “absolute corker”, and “what ho without there’ rolling off the tongue. The sympathetic bumbler that is Wooster along with the brilliant Jeeves are a genius combination that holds up well even though they were written almost 100 years ago.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a small collection of humorous short stories, half featuring Wooster and Jeeves, the other half featuring Reggie Pepper.I downloaded this book as a free read for the Kindle, having always meant to read some of the famous Wooster and Jeeves stories, but not realizing that these are early prototypes and therefore may not have been the best choice for the first-time Wodehouse reader. The Wooster and Jeeves stories were my favorites--I thought the Reggie Pepper ones were rather slight--and Wodehouse's wit is spot on, as is his characterization of Jeeves as the perfect British valet. There are a lot of lines worth a chuckle, and Wodehouse has perfected the "what? what? old bean" voice. (I could hear Hugh Laurie's voice in my head as I was reading, even though I have only watched maybe half of one episode of the TV series based on the stories.) The stories are a bit one-note, though. In each one, some ridiculous friend of Wooster's is in trouble of losing his easy ride via a rich aunt or uncle. The two turn to Jeeves for help, who proposes a complex scheme, which of course goes all wrong. Then Jeeves comes up with a brilliant way to remedy the situation and put things right. If Wodehouse were writing today, he definitely would be writing for television. While this was a short, enjoyable read, next time I fancy some Wodehouse, I will probably look for one of his later collections.Reading the classics plus the P.G. Wodehouse group read (2014).
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This is a set of short stories set mostly in New York, during Wooster’s stay there to avoid the wrath of Aunt Agatha. There are also three stories that feature a character named Reggie Pepper. More on him later. The Wooster stories are nice little gems, showing just how clever Jeeves is in assisting Bertie’s friends who have more relationship and money troubles than any group of people likely to be found anywhere else in literature. Seriously, I don’t think Bertie has a single friend who hasn’t needed Jeeves assistance in sorting out some sort of problem. Anyway, these are delightful, as always.The three Reggie Pepper stories seems a little out of place, considering that Jeeves was not in them. However I recognized two out of the three, since the TV series of Jeeves & Wooster co-opted the stories for a couple of episodes. It wasn’t hard to do: Reggie is very similar to Bertie, but without so remarkable a valet. All the TV show had to do was make an excuse for Jeeves not being with Bertie at the time, change a few names, and that’s it. Anyway these stories were fun too.The final story is another one with Wooster, rounding off the collection nicely. I confused my coworkers more than once by giggling aloud at this book while I was supposed to be working. This book would serve as a great introduction to the world of Bertie Wooster and Jeeves, for the curious. This who already know the characters would definitely not want to miss out on this installment.
  • Rating: 5 out of 5 stars
    5/5
    4.5 stars.

    This was awesome.

    British? Check. Hilarity? Check. Quirky characters? Check. Sidesplitting descriptions and dialogue? Check.

    I just *love* all the British-isms in both dialogue and descriptions. Some I had to google to know what they meant, but that just made it all the more fun. Oh, to talk like a Brit! I have so many highlights on my kindle.

    Bertie is a hilarious and quirky character, and his narration is just so fun to read. The situations he finds himself in are so amusing. And Jeeves is . . . so proper and serious and hilarious.

    Half a star off because it got a little boring in the middle, but the rest was so good, it was 5 star worthy! Highly recommended, especially if you love British humor! Recommend for ages 15-16 for interest level.

    A Sampling:

    "I tell you, Bertie, I've examined the darned cloud with a microscope, and if it's got a silver lining it's some little dissembler!"

    "I'm a bit short on brain myself; the old bean would appear to have been constructed more for ornament than for use, don't you know;"

    "Lady Malvern tried to freeze him with a look, but you can't do that sort of thing to Jeeves. He is look-proof."
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Fun, well-written brain candy :)
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Bertie Wooster is a young English gentleman of wealth and leisure, living in New York City, with his man, Jeeves.

    Jeeves is considerably the smarter of the two, a fact which Bertie acknowledges freely. Bertie gets into difficulties and scrapes, or his friends do, and Jeeves gets them out, with style, grace, and aplomb.

    About half of these stories are about Bertie and Jeeves. The other half are about another young English gentleman of wealth and leisure, Reginald Pepper, who lives in London and travels rather freely. He has a man, too, but his is far less active than Jeeves, and Reggie has to solve his own problems, for the most part. They're both good-natured young men, meaning only the best to their friends and no harm to anyone, and for the most part, that's what they achieve.

    These are light, humorous stories, pure entertainment, and they were contemporary fiction when they were written. They're fun, with no pretensions to be anything more.

    Recommended for the light entertainment they're intended to be.

    I bought this audiobook.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    This collection of short stories sees Bertie Wooster consistently get into scrapes on his own or with one of his many chums, to be rescued repeatedly by his truly excellent valet, Jeeves. The collection also includes several stories featuring Reggie Pepper who also has quite the proclivity for getting into trouble. Just as funny and charming as I had expected based on my few prior exposures to Wodehouse's writing.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Only half of the eight short stories in My Man Jeeves feature Bertie Wooster and his valet, Jeeves. The other four stories feature Reggie Pepper. Reggie gets caught up in the same sort of dilemmas that plague Bertie. While Reggie is brighter than Bertie (as most people probably would be), he doesn't have a Jeeves to save the day.I had seen the television version of the Jeeves & Wooster stories, and had also heard most of them in the audio version of Carry On, Jeeves, read by Martin Jarvis. I prefer Martin Jarvis's version to Jonathan Cecil's, mainly because Cecil's voice sounds too aged to fit the characters.My favorite stories in the collection were two of the Reggie Pepper stories. In “Helping Freddie”, Reggie mistakenly kidnaps a small child. More complications ensue when he tries to reunite the child with his family. In “Rallying Round Old George”, Reggie comes to the aid of a friend who may have committed a crime he doesn't remember.There are more similarities than differences between the Jeeves and Wooster stories and the Reggie Pepper stories. They make a great choice for readers who enjoy humor about people with more money than sense, with just a touch of romance.
  • Rating: 2 out of 5 stars
    2/5
    Everyone else seems to find this funnier than I do - it made me smile a couple of times, but never laugh.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Charming collection of Wooster/Jeeves and Reggie Pepper stories.There is not too much to say about these bits of fluff. I read them on my Kindle during lunch hours and they proved a nice diversion. I enjoyed the Bertie Wooster and Jeeves tales more than the others, as Jeeves is just such a perfect straight man. Some of the off the cuff remarks and descriptions were very funny. My two favorites:”…I hadn’t the heart to touch my breakfast. I told Jeeves to drink it himself.” from “Leave It To Jeeves””She fitted into my biggest arm-chair as if it had been built round her by someone who knew they were wearing arm-chairs tight about the hips that season.” from “Jeeves and the Unbidden Guest”I look forward to reading more Wodehouse but will do so in small doses. I think it would lose its charm if taken too much at a time.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    I have only read one other Jeeves book. I enjoyed the other book more I believe. This is just a collection so it wasn't a novel and I would have liked that more. I was just looking for something avaiable at gutenberg.org that was a Bertie and Jeeves book and this was what I found.
  • Rating: 3 out of 5 stars
    3/5
    Book on CD performed by Jonathan Cecil
    3***

    Bertie Wooster isn’t particularly talented or resourceful. He does have a significant income, however and is generous to his many friends. But his best asset is his man, Jeeves – an unflappable, intelligent, resourceful, creative, and discreet valet.

    Wodehouse wrote and published these stories as articles in various periodicals. Published as a collection, they appeal to fans of the genre, but …

    While they were fun and a great escape, the plots are repetitive, and I got tired of them after about four in a row. Still they were a nice diversion after reading some “heavier” material.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Topping good tales, what?
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Like any well-educated reader, I have heard of Jeeves and Bertie Wooster for about as long as I can remember, but I had never actually read any of the stories (or even seen any of the TV versions) until downloading this first collection of Jeeves (and other) stories almost randomly from Project Gutenberg. It was not quite what I was expecting. Jeeves, at least in these early stories, is not quite as smart as I imagined he would be. His plans never go exactly as intended, though he manages to resolve things by the end. Nor did I find Bertie Wooster to be quite as helpless or stupid as I imagined he might be. He would not, for instance, be a suitable contestant in the Upper Class Twit of the Year Contest. He is lazy, however, hates to be awakened at any reasonable hour in the morning, and is more than willing to leave things up to Jeeves, whom he has wisely realized is capable of making decisions that are better than his own. These usually involve some sort of predicament that Bertie's friends have gotten themselves into, and the solution usually involves some inconvenience on Bertie's part, which, despite his complaints, he handles well enough (even succeeding in dressing himself when exiled to a hotel in one case!)This volume contains four Jeeves stories. The other stories in the book concern Reggie Pepper, who is very much like Bertie Wooster, only he doesn't have a "man" like Jeeves to help him out. Frankly, there isn't a lot to separate the two sets of stories in terms of enjoyment. The plots are not really important, either in their details or their outcome. Nor is there really any laugh out loud humor. The pleasure of these stories comes in their small absurdities, the wry observations that the narrator (or Jeeves) makes, and with the ability to be a fly on the wall in a world of upper class goings-on that seem pretty trivial compared to real life. Being a bit of an Anglophile, I enjoyed the visit. I assume that the stories may grow a little funnier and the characters perhaps more caricatured as the series goes on, and I suspect I'll return to Wodehouse after a while to find out if I'm right.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    Of the eight short stories in this collection I preferred the four featuring Jeeves & Wooster over the Reggie Pepper tales. No one story stood out as especially good or particularly bad, therefore I rate this as a good assortment overall.
  • Rating: 4 out of 5 stars
    4/5
    There is a line in one of Jasper Fforde's Thursday Next books about a character being so straight-laced, he could read P.G. Wodehouse without ever laughing. So clearly, I had to read something by him. This is the first and only of Wodehouse's work I've ever read. While it was certainly entertaining and good for a few chuckles, I spent the entire book thinking "I'm missing something. I have to be missing something."My Man Jeeves is a series of anecdotes which could easily be read as short stories following the life of a young rich British man (the kind of rich that has never required work from the narrator)-mostly set in New York City in the '20s, the problems he and his very rich friends get into, and how his valet Jeeves concocts plans to help them out of the problems. It's a bit like reading an entertaining version of The Great Gatsby.A good light read that has obviously influenced comedy writers greatly.

Book preview

My Man Jeeves - P. G. Wodehouse

978-963-524-487-4

Leave it to Jeeves

Jeeves—my man, you know—is really a most extraordinary chap. So capable. Honestly, I shouldn't know what to do without him. On broader lines he's like those chappies who sit peering sadly over the marble battlements at the Pennsylvania Station in the place marked Inquiries. You know the Johnnies I mean. You go up to them and say: When's the next train for Melonsquashville, Tennessee? and they reply, without stopping to think, Two-forty-three, track ten, change at San Francisco. And they're right every time. Well, Jeeves gives you just the same impression of omniscience.

As an instance of what I mean, I remember meeting Monty Byng in Bond Street one morning, looking the last word in a grey check suit, and I felt I should never be happy till I had one like it. I dug the address of the tailors out of him, and had them working on the thing inside the hour.

Jeeves, I said that evening. "I'm getting a check suit like that one

of Mr. Byng's."

Injudicious, sir, he said firmly. It will not become you.

What absolute rot! It's the soundest thing I've struck for years.

Unsuitable for you, sir.

Well, the long and the short of it was that the confounded thing came home, and I put it on, and when I caught sight of myself in the glass I nearly swooned. Jeeves was perfectly right. I looked a cross between a music-hall comedian and a cheap bookie. Yet Monty had looked fine in absolutely the same stuff. These things are just Life's mysteries, and that's all there is to it.

But it isn't only that Jeeves's judgment about clothes is infallible, though, of course, that's really the main thing. The man knows everything. There was the matter of that tip on the Lincolnshire. I forget now how I got it, but it had the aspect of being the real, red-hot tabasco.

Jeeves, I said, for I'm fond of the man, and like to do him a good turn when I can, if you want to make a bit of money have something on Wonderchild for the 'Lincolnshire.'

He shook his head.

I'd rather not, sir.

But it's the straight goods. I'm going to put my shirt on him.

I do not recommend it, sir. The animal is not intended to win. Second place is what the stable is after.

Perfect piffle, I thought, of course. How the deuce could Jeeves know anything about it? Still, you know what happened. Wonderchild led till he was breathing on the wire, and then Banana Fritter came along and nosed him out. I went straight home and rang for Jeeves.

After this, I said, not another step for me without your advice. From now on consider yourself the brains of the establishment.

Very good, sir. I shall endeavour to give satisfaction.

And he has, by Jove! I'm a bit short on brain myself; the old bean would appear to have been constructed more for ornament than for use, don't you know; but give me five minutes to talk the thing over with Jeeves, and I'm game to advise any one about anything. And that's why, when Bruce Corcoran came to me with his troubles, my first act was to ring the bell and put it up to the lad with the bulging forehead.

Leave it to Jeeves, I said.

I first got to know Corky when I came to New York. He was a pal of my cousin Gussie, who was in with a lot of people down Washington Square way. I don't know if I ever told you about it, but the reason why I left England was because I was sent over by my Aunt Agatha to try to stop young Gussie marrying a girl on the vaudeville stage, and I got the whole thing so mixed up that I decided that it would be a sound scheme for me to stop on in America for a bit instead of going back and having long cosy chats about the thing with aunt. So I sent Jeeves out to find a decent apartment, and settled down for a bit of exile. I'm bound to say that New York's a topping place to be exiled in. Everybody was awfully good to me, and there seemed to be plenty of things going on, and I'm a wealthy bird, so everything was fine. Chappies introduced me to other chappies, and so on and so forth, and it wasn't long before I knew squads of the right sort, some who rolled in dollars in houses up by the Park, and others who lived with the gas turned down mostly around Washington Square—artists and writers and so forth. Brainy coves.

Corky was one of the artists. A portrait-painter, he called himself, but he hadn't painted any portraits. He was sitting on the side-lines with a blanket over his shoulders, waiting for a chance to get into the game. You see, the catch about portrait-painting—I've looked into the thing a bit—is that you can't start painting portraits till people come along and ask you to, and they won't come and ask you to until you've painted a lot first. This makes it kind of difficult for a chappie. Corky managed to get along by drawing an occasional picture for the comic papers—he had rather a gift for funny stuff when he got a good idea—and doing bedsteads and chairs and things for the advertisements. His principal source of income, however, was derived from biting the ear of a rich uncle—one Alexander Worple, who was in the jute business. I'm a bit foggy as to what jute is, but it's apparently something the populace is pretty keen on, for Mr. Worple had made quite an indecently large stack out of it.

Now, a great many fellows think that having a rich uncle is a pretty soft snap: but, according to Corky, such is not the case. Corky's uncle was a robust sort of cove, who looked like living for ever. He was fifty-one, and it seemed as if he might go to par. It was not this, however, that distressed poor old Corky, for he was not bigoted and had no objection to the man going on living. What Corky kicked at was the way the above Worple used to harry him.

Corky's uncle, you see, didn't want him to be an artist. He didn't think he had any talent in that direction. He was always urging him to chuck Art and go into the jute business and start at the bottom and work his way up. Jute had apparently become a sort of obsession with him. He seemed to attach almost a spiritual importance to it. And what Corky said was that, while he didn't know what they did at the bottom of the jute business, instinct told him that it was something too beastly for words. Corky, moreover, believed in his future as an artist. Some day, he said, he was going to make a hit. Meanwhile, by using the utmost tact and persuasiveness, he was inducing his uncle to cough up very grudgingly a small quarterly allowance.

He wouldn't have got this if his uncle hadn't had a hobby. Mr. Worple was peculiar in this respect. As a rule, from what I've observed, the American captain of industry doesn't do anything out of business hours. When he has put the cat out and locked up the office for the night, he just relapses into a state of coma from which he emerges only to start being a captain of industry again. But Mr. Worple in his spare time was what is known as an ornithologist. He had written a book called American Birds, and was writing another, to be called More American Birds. When he had finished that, the presumption was that he would begin a third, and keep on till the supply of American birds gave out. Corky used to go to him about once every three months and let him talk about American birds. Apparently you could do what you liked with old Worple if you gave him his head first on his pet subject, so these little chats used to make Corky's allowance all right for the time being. But it was pretty rotten for the poor chap. There was the frightful suspense, you see, and, apart from that, birds, except when broiled and in the society of a cold bottle, bored him stiff.

To complete the character-study of Mr. Worple, he was a man of extremely uncertain temper, and his general tendency was to think that Corky was a poor chump and that whatever step he took in any direction on his own account, was just another proof of his innate idiocy. I should imagine Jeeves feels very much the same about me.

So when Corky trickled into my apartment one afternoon, shooing a girl in front of him, and said, Bertie, I want you to meet my fiancée, Miss Singer, the aspect of the matter which hit me first was precisely the one which he had come to consult me about. The very first words I spoke were, Corky, how about your uncle?

The poor chap gave one of those mirthless laughs. He was looking anxious and worried, like a man who has done the murder all right but can't think what the deuce to do with the body.

We're so scared, Mr. Wooster, said the girl. We were hoping that you might suggest a way of breaking it to him.

Muriel Singer was one of those very quiet, appealing girls who have a way of looking at you with their big eyes as if they thought you were the greatest thing on earth and wondered that you hadn't got on to it yet yourself. She sat there in a sort of shrinking way, looking at me as if she were saying to herself, Oh, I do hope this great strong man isn't going to hurt me. She gave a fellow a protective kind of feeling, made him want to stroke her hand and say, There, there, little one! or words to that effect. She made me feel that there was nothing I wouldn't do for her. She was rather like one of those innocent-tasting American drinks which creep imperceptibly into your system so that, before you know what you're doing, you're starting out to reform the world by force if necessary and pausing on your way to tell the large man in the corner that, if he looks at you like that, you will knock his head off. What I mean is, she made me feel alert and dashing, like a jolly old knight-errant or something of that kind. I felt that I was with her in this thing to the limit.

I don't see why your uncle shouldn't be most awfully bucked, I said to Corky. He will think Miss Singer the ideal wife for you.

Corky declined to cheer up.

You don't know him. Even if he did like Muriel he wouldn't admit it. That's the sort of pig-headed guy he is. It would be a matter of principle with him to kick. All he would consider would be that I had gone and taken an important step without asking his advice, and he would raise Cain automatically. He's always done it.

I strained the old bean to meet this emergency.

You want to work it so that he makes Miss Singer's acquaintance without knowing that you know her. Then you come along——

But how can I work it that way?

I saw his point. That was the catch.

There's only one thing to do, I said.

What's that?

Leave it to Jeeves.

And I rang the bell.

Sir? said Jeeves, kind of manifesting himself. One of the rummy things about Jeeves is that, unless you watch like a hawk, you very seldom see him come into a room. He's like one of those weird chappies in India who dissolve themselves into thin air and nip through space in a sort of disembodied way and assemble the parts again just where they want them. I've got a cousin who's what they call a Theosophist, and he says he's often nearly worked the thing himself, but couldn't quite bring it off, probably owing to having fed in his boyhood on the flesh of animals slain in anger and pie.

The moment I saw the man standing there, registering respectful attention, a weight seemed to roll off my mind. I felt like a lost child who spots his father in the offing. There was something about him that gave me confidence.

Jeeves is a tallish man, with one of those dark, shrewd faces. His eye gleams with the light of pure intelligence.

Jeeves, we want your advice.

Very good, sir.

I boiled down Corky's painful case into a few well-chosen words.

So you see what it amount to, Jeeves. We want you to suggest some way by which Mr. Worple can make Miss Singer's acquaintance without getting on to the fact that Mr. Corcoran already knows her. Understand?

Perfectly, sir.

Well, try to think of something.

I have thought of something already, sir.

You have!

The scheme I would suggest cannot fail of success, but it has what may seem to you a drawback, sir, in that it requires a certain financial outlay.

He means, I translated to Corky, that he has got a pippin of an idea, but it's going to cost a bit.

Naturally the poor chap's face dropped, for this seemed to dish the whole thing. But I was still under the influence of the girl's melting gaze, and I saw that this was where I started in as a knight-errant.

You can count on me for all that sort of thing, Corky, I said. Only too glad. Carry on, Jeeves.

I would suggest, sir, that Mr. Corcoran take advantage of Mr. Worple's attachment to ornithology.

How on earth did you know that he was fond of birds?

It is the way these New York apartments are constructed, sir. Quite unlike our London houses. The partitions between the rooms are of the flimsiest nature. With no wish to overhear, I have sometimes heard Mr. Corcoran expressing himself with a generous strength on the subject I have mentioned.

Oh! Well?

"Why should not the young lady write a small volume, to be entitled—let us say—The Children's Book of American Birds, and dedicate it to Mr. Worple! A limited edition could be published at your expense, sir, and a great deal of the book would, of course, be given over to eulogistic remarks concerning Mr. Worple's own larger treatise on the same subject. I should recommend the dispatching of a presentation copy to Mr. Worple, immediately on publication, accompanied by a letter in which the young lady asks to be allowed to make the acquaintance of one to whom she owes so much. This would, I fancy, produce the desired result, but as I say, the expense involved would be considerable."

I felt like the proprietor of a performing dog on the vaudeville stage when the tyke has

Enjoying the preview?
Page 1 of 1