Running into Love: The Love Series: Jess, #1

1

Iroll over and press the sleep button on my alarm...again. It’s one of those mornings. It would be amazing to just fall back to sleep, but I know if I don’t get up now I’ll never muster up the energy for a run. With a heavy sigh, I toss back my comforter and swing my legs over the side of the bed. I raise my arms above my head in a long stretch as I yawn. I’m really not looking forward to running.

It takes me a minute, but I finally make myself stand up and walk toward my closet. Going back to bed and sleeping for another hour crosses my mind as I get dressed. I yawn again, this time moving my hand to cover my mouth. I glance at my bed longingly as I walk toward my door. It takes some extra effort, but I manage to make my way toward the living room and eventually the front door once I’ve grabbed my phone, armband and earbuds—today is definitely a music morning.

I put my earbuds in, put my music on shuffle and slide my phone into the armband. A somewhat slow song comes on as I start my pre-running stretches. I take my time, making sure to really stretch my hamstrings. Before my last run, I didn’t stretch well enough and I feel like I paid the price with a slight tweak in my right leg. It feels better now, but I don’t want to take any chances.

A smile forms on my face as a much higher tempo song comes on my phone just as I finish stretching. Perfect...exactly the kind of song I need to help me get started.

I turn onto the sidewalk in front of my house and start to run. My muscles protest momentarily, but they start to warm up within a few seconds. I’m already glad I dragged my butt out of bed this morning. I pick up my pace as I take a right at the next block.

I look up and see him running toward me. Ugh. Our eyes meet and I instantly know it’s too late to do anything to avoid him. I was just starting to have a good morning, too...and now this. He raises his hand and gives me a quick wave as we get closer. He moves into the middle of the sidewalk and starts to slow. I was really hoping he would move over and we could pass each other without stopping to talk, but it sure seems like that’s not going to happen.

Jess, he says, how are you?

I let out an exaggerated sigh as I come to a stop and put my hands on my hips. I look up at him and do my best to give him a dirty look as I pull my right earbud out.

Logan...what do you want?

He raises an eyebrow as a confused look crosses his face. It’s obviously an act, he knows exactly why I’m giving him attitude.

Nothing, I was just trying to be friendly.

I’m not sure if I believe him. The look on his face seems genuine enough, but there’s no telling what’s going on in his tiny jock-brain. I’m sure it’s not a whole heck of a lot.

Right...friendly.

He blinks a couple of times, a blank look plastered on his face. I shake my head and start to walk by him.

Wait...Jess...what’s wrong?

Seriously?

He holds out his hands and shrugs. Apparently, he has no idea why I’m irritated with him.

Is this about Amy? he asks.

I’m already a few steps away from him when his words reach me. Did he really just ask that? I stop, shake my head and spin around. I rip both earbuds out and take a step toward him. Logan towers over me, but that doesn’t mean I’m afraid to get up in his face.

It is about Amy. She’s my friend...and I’m not with pleased by what you did to her.

He shrugs slightly as if he’s not bothered, but I can’t tell if he’s brushing off what I’m saying or he’s trying to play down what he did to her. Either way I’m not happy with him.

I don’t know what to say, he says.

Obviously.

Look, I get that you’re mad at me,...but it’s not fair.

But what you did to Amy was fair?

He nods and looks at the ground. How the mighty have fallen. Maybe he’s finally starting to get it through his thick skull that what he did to her was really awful.

Everything happens for a reason, he says, lifting his eyes to look at me. I’m sorry that I pushed her away, I can’t deny that...she’s a wonderful young woman, but I think she was supposed to go down another path. She wouldn’t have been happy here with me....There was something bigger calling her.

I just stand there, looking at Logan, as I try to process what he just said. It certainly wasn’t what I was expecting him to say. There’s a chance it was a fluke, I guess, and that he somehow managed to string together a few sentences that actually made sense. I’m feeling sort of stunned.

Look, I’d like to hang out sometime, ...but I get that because of what happened to Amy that you probably don’t like me, Logan says. If you ever change your mind...it would be nice—there’s more to me than most people think...and I have a feeling you don’t believe that. It would be nice for me to have a chance to show you the true me. There’s always two sides to a story, ...even this one.

I wrinkle my forehead as I look at him, still unsure of how I can even respond to what he’s saying. He briefly shakes his head, almost as if he’s disappointed in me. Logan turns and starts running again. I stand there, completely still, just watching him, until he reaches the end of the block and turns down the next one. Eventually I put my earbuds back in and start to run again with the hope that it’ll clear my head and help me make sense of everything he said to me.

Running doesn’t seem to be helping, so I turn around a few blocks later and head home. I take out my earbuds and stop my music as I climb the front steps and head back in my house. I peel off my armband and pull out my phone. I walk into the kitchen and set my phone down on the counter before pulling open the fridge. That short run didn’t really give me enough of a workout to increase my appetite, but I should eat something because today is probably going to be long—I have class and then work tonight.

I take out eggs, an apple and two carrots from the fridge. My mind goes blank as I go through the motions of cooking and before I know it I’m sitting down at my table with a plate of food that I don’t remember preparing. I pick up a slice of apple, which rewards me with a satisfying crunch as I bite down on it.

My whole conversation with Logan just strikes me as so strange and I’m really not sure what to make of it. I pick up my fork and slowly eat some of my eggs, but I only make it halfway through my breakfast before I get up from the table and throw the rest of it away—I’m so distracted and just confused, really.

The more I think about what Logan said, the more I wonder what he really meant. Was he asking if we could hang out because he likes me? I feel like I’d be a terrible friend to Amy, if that was the case and I said yes. I guess maybe Logan just wants to get together and tell me his version of what happened between him and Amy...which would be kind of weird, I think. He has to know that I’d be partial to what Amy told me. I could go meet him for coffee or something. I shake my head and push the thoughts out of my mind.

I grab my phone and sit down on the couch. This is exactly the kind of problem running is supposed to solve, ...not create. My first thought is to text Amy. She wasn’t with Logan for very long, but it seems like she might know something about what happened between them that I don’t. A smile crosses my face as I think about Amy—I’m still sad that I lost her as a roommate. She was here for such a short time, but I really feel like we made a special connection, the kind that means we’ll be friends for life. I decide against texting her. ...If it was about anyone else I probably would, but not Logan. Instead, I pull up Chloe’s number and type out a text.

What are you doing?

My phone chirps with a response just a few seconds later.

Nothing...just sitting in my room watching some TV. What’s up?

I sigh and look out the window. Do I really want to go down this road? It’s not too late to change my mind and not bring up my whole meeting with Logan. I know it’s what I should probably do, but there’s something deep inside of me pushing me forward. I look down at the text I just wrote, my finger hovers over the send button...and I press it.

Hey, I know this is going to sound weird...but I just talked to this jock and he wants to get together. He always seemed just like a pretty face, but told me that there’s more to him than people think. For some reason I believe him, but I kind of got the impression that getting together might be like a romantic kind of thing, or something. I’m not really sure what to do.

Chloe is probably going to think I’m out of my mind. I drum my fingers on the screen of my phone until it lights up with a response from her.

I’m not really sure what you’re trying to say. Do you like this guy, but you’re afraid to admit it? I don’t know what to tell you...except maybe if you were a little clearer about what’s going on, I might be able to help.

I tilt my head back and look at the ceiling. She’s right. In my mind I was trying to ask her what she thought I should do and it didn’t exactly come across that way. My text sounded more like I was a bit of a babbling idiot who didn’t know what she was thinking.

What if Chloe is right? Maybe I do like Logan, or at least think he’s cute, but this whole time I was afraid to even admit it to myself because of what happened with Amy. I still remember sophomore year of high school there was a girl in my group of friends, Heather, who went out with the ex of another friend...and we never spoke to her again. We called her names...we made sure she was ostracized for what she did. I haven’t thought about her in years, but it all came rushing back as I thought about my feelings toward Logan. I feel bad for what we did, but at the same time it seemed like dating the ex of a friend was an awful thing to do to someone you considered a friend.

I’m really getting ahead of myself. I take a deep breath, shake my head and look back down at my phone. Sure, I think Logan is cute...but I’ve never thought about him in any other way. I’ve never wondered what it would be like to date him or what kind of guy he really is—although I just assumed he was a typical jock. I write out a response to Chloe and hit send.

I know...I’m not really sure what I’m trying to say. Are you working tomorrow? Maybe we can talk about it if work is slow.

Even if she’s not working it’ll give me a chance to try and figure out my feelings. I really want to be mad at Logan, for what he did, and I was until I saw him...and then things just shifted with no explanation. My phone lights up with a text from Chloe.

No, I’m working tonight and I have tomorrow off. I think Dale is not scheduling us together for some reason...it’s weird, but we haven’t been on the same shift for like the past two weeks.

I wrinkle my forehead as I think about it. She’s right, we haven’t worked together lately, which kind of sucks because I really like being on the same shift as her. Chloe is the one that got me the job there originally after we met in a freshman English class and I mentioned I was looking for a job. It’s a decent place to work...there are definitely times when I don’t like closing because I don’t get out of there until like two and getting up for school the next day is crappy, but the tips are pretty good and I really like working with Chloe, we have a lot of fun. I text her back and stand up from the couch.

Ugh, I’m off tonight and closing tomorrow. So weird, I don’t get why Dale is messing with the schedule. I miss working with you.

I walk into my room and set my phone down on the bed. If I don’t get my butt in gear I’m going to be late for class, again. I check my phone again before heading toward the bathroom to shower.

I miss it, too. I’ll talk to Dale tonight and see if he can put us on some shifts together next time he does the schedule. I don’t see why not...but whatever.

I turn on the shower and hold my left hand in the water until it finally starts to warm up. I respond to Chloe, hit send and place my phone down on the bathroom counter before jumping into the shower.

That sounds good. I’ll talk to him tomorrow, too. It just doesn’t make sense why he’d change it like that all of a sudden. Whatever.

I tilt my head forward as the hot water cascades over me. Within a few seconds, I can feel my body relaxing...I didn’t even realize I was feeling so tense, but it does kind of make sense considering how running into Logan seemed to affect me. I feel the muscles in my neck tightening as I think about my chat with Logan. Weird. I clear my mind of everything related to him and I feel better instantly.

I look at myself in the mirror and smile. I don’t usually care what I wear to class—there’s been more than a handful of times when I showed up in sweats and a T-shirt—but today I decided I should wear something a little nicer.

When I went shopping last week, I bought red patent leather pumps that I’ve been dying to wear, but they just don’t go with the sleeveless tie-front blouse and skinny jeans I’m wearing. I decide to just wear a pair of black flats, but I promise myself I’ll invent a reason to wear the pumps soon.

I check my phone before dropping it into my purse, grabbing my keys off the counter and heading out of the house. I’m running a couple of minutes behind, which is not good because Mr. Lee is kind of a stickler about getting to class on time. If I’m lucky, I might be able to slip in without disturbing the class and he won’t make a big deal out of it.

There happens to be an empty spot in the second row when I get to the parking lot, something that almost never happens. I grab my purse and my tote, which has my book and notepad for class, and hurry toward the building. There’s no one milling around outside, so I know I’m late already.

I stop in front of room 1123 and look through the window in the door. Everyone is already sitting down and Mr. Lee is standing in front of the class. I can hear his booming voice through the closed door. I should be able to slip in and grab a seat close to the door without drawing any attention to myself.

The door hinges screech in protest as soon as I push it open. I freeze. The whole class is staring at me and even Mr. Lee is looking in my direction. I mouth Sorry while looking at them all and I slide through the door and gently close it. I can feel all the eyes on me as I walk toward the closest desk and sit down.

Right, Mr. Lee says, taking back the attention of everyone. Where was I? Oh...yes...I was talking about consumer behavior.

He glances over at me, again, walks back to his desk and slams his fist down on it with enough force that the entire class jumps in their chairs.

"Do I have your attention? Good...I thought so. I’m tired of certain people not respecting the class. From now on, if you’re going to be late...don’t bother coming. You obviously don’t want to be here...so don’t waste my time. It’s a privilege for you all to be here, not a right...and I think you forget that sometimes."

I’m mortified. I know he doesn’t like people coming in late, but