Esther's Song: A Novel

1.   Yahweh is my shepherd, I will

never do without.

2.   In pasturage of new fresh grass,

he causes me to lie down;

beside waters of rest,

he guides me.

3.   My soul he will restore;

he will lead me in tracks of righteousness

for the sake of his name.

4.   Even if I will walk in a valley of darkness,

I will never fear evil, for you are with me;

your rod and your staff

will comfort me.

5.   You prepare before me a table

in the presence of the ones oppressing me;

you revive with oil my head;

my drinking cup overflows.

6.   Surely goodness and loving-kindness will

pursue me all the days of my life;

and I will dwell in the house of

Yahweh for length of days.

                                    Psalm 23 Author Translation

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Chapter One

Hadassah, will you sleep all day? If you do not get down here at once, I will drag you out of bed myself.

I had no doubt Ustana, my nursemaid since birth, would do just as she threatened. I sat up and yelled back, I’m coming.

I grabbed the tunic I had worn the day before off the floor and slipped it over my head. Taking no chances I hurried down the stairs while running my fingers through my disheveled hair. Reaching the bottom I straightened my tunic and sash and gave my hair a final pat. I rushed toward the back of the house.

With relief I found myself alone and that there was still a bit of bread left to abate my hunger pains. I popped the bread into my mouth and washed it down with a gulp of tepid water. I knew I should get to my studies, but I could not seem to make my feet move. I let my thoughts drift.

My mind was filled with tooled leather quivers and stout bows, daggers dangling from embroidered belts, and silver-headed spears flashing with each step. Soldiers marching up the Royal Road toward the citadel of Susa escorting a stream of curtained carriages, which I somehow knew carried virgins meant to please the king.

A solitary carriage veered onto a narrow lane coming to a standstill in front of a mud-brick walled compound. Two men dressed in gold and green embroidered robes appeared in front of the gated entrance—just like the one outside my house. My disquieting dream of the previous night refused to go away no matter what I tried to think about.

I got up and looked out the window. I was sure the vivid images were due to the endless gossip of the servants about the Great King’s search for a new queen.

Ustana burst into the room. In spite of her stout build and short legs, she could move with the stealth of a lion stalking its unsuspecting prey.

Stop daydreaming, girl. The tutor is here. She scooped up the empty plate and cup.

I just have to get my things. Since I had been a small child, Father made known his expectations that one day I should be able to read the books of Moses and manage the household accounts. This kind of training was rare for Jewish women, but Father said high-ranking Persian women were often well educated.

I loved my studies and looked forward to each lesson. Most days I was eager to begin, but today was not one of them. With an armful of scrolls, I entered the front sitting room where Napumalika sat tapping his slender fingers.

He stood up. Finally you make your appearance.

Most worthy teacher, I am sorry I am late. It won’t happen again. I gave a stiff bow.

Napumalika sat down with a snort.

The loud thud of the front door hitting the entrance wall reverberated throughout the room.

Where are you, Hadassah? Father’s voice boomed out as he rushed past us to the foot of the stairs.

I am here, Father.

He turned and uncharacteristically dashed back to the sitting room, hands flailing toward the tutor. Hadassah will not be able to finish her lesson today. I am sorry Napumalika, but you must leave us.

I could see by his blank face my tutor was astounded at such treatment. He gathered his things and stomped out making it clear he was not pleased at all with such curtness.

Father wrestled off his leather coat and tossed it onto the nearest chair, which I began to fold.

His arm quivered as he pointed toward a green and blue checked pillow on the floor. Hadassah, sit down. There is something I must tell you.

I crossed my ankles and sank onto the cushion. Father, you are not ill are you?

He shook his head and seated himself on a low chair. I am fine, but I have extraordinary news. I don’t know how to begin.

What kind of news is it? I was certain only bad news would make him leave his administrative duties so early in the day.

Something I heard while sitting at the King’s Gate. He puckered his lips and stroked his graying beard.

We sat in silence while Father looked intently into my face.

I could wait no longer to hear his news. Tell me Father, what did you hear?

He inhaled and then exhaled loudly. You must hurry and pack. Royal couriers will be here soon.

What do you mean royal couriers will be here soon? Why would they do that?

Do you remember when I told you about Queen Amestris’ refusal to appear before the court, and the Great King’s decision to search out all the beautiful virgins in the land for a new queen…? Yes, I see by your expression you do remember.

I nodded. But what does that have to do with me?

Father leaned forward. I overheard two palace guards talking about a beautiful girl who lives here in Susa, and then they spoke my name and yours. The king’s couriers will take you to the palace citadel. If you are found acceptable by the king’s eunuch Hegai, you will enter the women’s quarters and be entrusted to him.

I rubbed my hand on the woven wool carpet I so loved with its comforting yellow, white, and moss green roses and eight-pointed stars. Why would the king desire me? I was nothing special. How could I leave Father and Ustana? I tried to hold back the tears welling up.

I clenched my hands tight, driving the fingernails into my palms. I don’t want to be put away in some harem. Tell the couriers to go away. Tell them I am not here. Tell them anything you like, just don’t let them take me away.

Father lifted my chin. Dodi, my beloved child, don’t be angry. It will be all right. I am sure of it. Bathsheba’s beauty was nothing compared to yours. Even King David could not resist her. Can the Great King do less?

I scowled. How do you know what Bathsheba looked like?

He shrugged his broad shoulders and gave a wary smile. You have grown from a plain child to a well-favored young woman, with eyes like a dove’s and waist-length raven hair. I know you, and I also know the king will not be able to withstand your charm and graciousness. I spoke with Hegai as soon as I heard you had been chosen. He is a kind man and will take good care of you, and of course I will not be far away.

But—

He put a finger to his lips and shook his head. No buts, Dodi. You must listen carefully to what I have to say. Some girls have already been taken to the citadel and sent back as unworthy of this great honor. That will not happen to you. You look like a princess and might well have been one if Jerusalem had not fallen. We are of the house of King Saul, are we not?

What nonsense he was speaking, me a princess? I don’t want to leave you. I am no princess and I don’t want to be a queen.

You are still young and do not know what you want. When they take you to the palace and then to the harem, walk proud. Keep your eyes lowered, and your back straight. Never show fear or let anyone see you with a sad countenance.

Father stood up. Now, you must dress quickly in your best outfit. I will not have you looking disheveled. Ustana, come here.

My nursemaid must have been listening at the door for she came right in.

Help Hadassah change into her finest clothes and do her hair.

Ustana certainly had been eavesdropping. Two scullery maids were pouring pitchers of hot water into a round copper tub when we reached the enclosed porch. The hot water had begun to steam up the small room as I took off my worn, but much-loved everyday garment.

Handing me the soap Ustana said in an unusually harsh voice, Make sure you clean behind your ears. I do not want anyone to think I don’t know how to do my job. I will pack your things while you bathe. Is there anything special you want to take?

I closed my eyes and willed her gone. Pack whatever you think best. I did not hear her leave, but rather sensed her absence.

Drawing my knees close to my chest, I clasped my arms around them, and looked heavenward. O God of my fathers, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of this child. You know I don’t want to leave Father. But if I must—if it is indeed what you will, then let me please the king for the sake of him who has been a father to me. I sank down and let the warm water comfort me.

Footsteps coming my way broke my reflections. I began scrubbing in earnest as Ustana rushed into the room with a large cotton towel held out in front of her.

You aren’t finished yet? She dropped the towel, picked up a nearby pitcher, and poured warm water over my soapy shoulders. You must get out of the tub and dry off as fast as you can.

I did as I was told. She wrapped me in the towel and gave me a tight hug. We walked silently to my sleeping room.

The corners of Ustana’s mouth turned up. You had better hurry and get dressed or your father will have me whipped.

Because I was already a head taller than Ustana, she stood on a stool while I bent down in front of her. She slid the pale yellow-sleeved chiton over my head, followed by an umber tunic. She stepped down from the stool to adjust the garments with a tug here and a pull there, and then wrapped a dark brown embroidered silk sash around my waist several times to hold everything in place. I sat down on the stool while she buttoned my ankle high dark yellow suede shoes.

I heard Father climbing the stairs, breathing heavily.

He knocked before entering the room. You must hurry. The soldiers will be here any moment and it is imperative I speak to you before they arrive.

She is almost finished. I only have to do her hair and she will be ready. Here are her things. Put them by the door.

Normally Ustana would have addressed Father more formally, but I could tell she wanted him out of the way. She deftly wove my straight hair into a single thick braid hanging down my back.

My darling Hadassah, what will I do without you? We have been together since your poor mother died so long ago; you are like my own child and I am the only mother you have known. Let me bless you before you go.

I felt ready to cry again. I would like that very much.

She gently laid her calloused hands upon my bowed head. May the God of heaven take care of you my darling Hadassah, may he watch over you with all diligence, and give you favor in the eyes of the king. She hugged me once more and tucked a stray hair behind my ear.

We descended to the sitting room where Father paced back and forth. Waving Ustana off, he motioned for me to sit.

I have something that belongs to you.

He placed a white silk packet in my lap, secured with a dark blue ribbon. I untied the bow and opened the cloth to reveal two identical lamb-headed gold bracelets trimmed with lapis lazuli, turquoise, and mother-of-pearl.

I gasped. I have never seen anything so intricately worked. The pointy ears are perfect. I slipped one on each wrist.

They belonged to your mother. Before your father died he made me swear that I would give them to you on your wedding day. Since only the God of Israel knows if we will see each other again, I have decided to give them to you now to remind you of your parents and of our happy life together.

These were my mother’s bracelets? I fingered the delicate outline of each lamb’s head as Father watched.

Yes, they were. But there is something I must ask you to do before you leave. When you go into the harem, I beseech you to not reveal your family background or nationality. If asked about your past, only say that I am your foster father and you are my foster daughter and nothing else. You must do this for me. It is all I ask.

I don’t understand.

I am sorry, but there is no time to explain. Just promise you will do as I ask.

Why not tell anyone my nationality or family background? What a strange request. What difference could it make? Of course, Father. If that is what you desire, I will do as you ask.

Our ancient gardener shuffled into the room unannounced, with Ustana tugging at his sleeve. I told him not to disturb you.

What is it, Joshua?

Two royal couriers are at the gate. They say they have urgent business with you, my lord.

Show them to the front hall. Ustana will see to the rest.

Yes, your lordship, they replied in unison.

Father motioned for me to wrap up the bracelets. I think the safest place for them is in your sash.

I gathered the ends of the silk square together and retied the ribbon, before tucking the only memento I had of my mother into my sash. With outstretched arms I rushed to my father and held him fast.

We were still entwined when Ustana returned with the two gold and green robed men. The very ones I had seen in my dream. I slumped down onto the nearest chair mouth agape. Could my revelation truly be a prophecy from the God of heaven? Closing my mouth I tried to make myself as small as possible, praying the stocky soldier would not see me.

Father opened his arms wide. Welcome to my humble home. What is it that I can do for you?

The taller one took a step forward. Are you Mordecai the Jew, who sits at the King’s Gate?

Father nodded. I am.

He squared his shoulders. At the king’s command we have come for your daughter Hadassah. She will be taken to the palace and entrusted to Hegai, who has oversight of the palace women. If she pleases the king, who knows but she may become the next queen of the Persians and the Medes.

Father bowed deeply before the courier. Here is Hadassah, the one you seek.

Father helped me to my feet. My stomach churned as I clutched his arm.

While prying my fingers loose, he gave me a light kiss on each cheek. Dodi, we may be apart in the flesh but not in the spirit, for how could either of us forget the other? Now you must go as God wills and do all that is commanded of you.

Ustana jutted her chin out and pointed at the shorter soldier to take my trunk with him. Father walked me to the waiting carriage and helped me up the two steps. I looked in and a girl with a lute moved over. I sat down barely acknowledging the other occupants. The carriage smelled of unwashed bodies, sweat, and a heavenly concoction of spicy perfume and aromatic oils. A horse snorted, the carriage began to sway, and my seatmate strummed a mournful tune. I wished I could see out. The curtains tinged everything a viscous hue of reddish-purple.

Feeling calmer, I began to examine the girls around me. The sandals directly across from me caught my attention. They were unlike any footwear I had ever seen, gold-colored straps trimmed with brilliant gems, from which protruded pearl-like manicured toenails. I looked up in time to meet the owner’s dark almond-shaped eyes looking at me. I lowered my gaze, but had there been a glimmer of a smile? I wasn’t sure, but maybe things would not be as quite as terrible as I had imagined.

I began to hum to myself to pass the time in anticipation of our arrival at the palace and perhaps being able to get to know the exotic beauty across from me better.

The carriage creaked to a halt. I could feel my heart begin to pound. The carriage door swung open and light flooded in. I could hardly see to step out of the carriage. I started to fall, but caught myself in time.

I heard the other girls lining up behind me. Able to see clearly once more I noted our arrival in a spacious courtyard. Under a sun disk of the Persian god Ahura Mazda stood two sphinxes with human heads and lion-like bodies. Each wore a gold crown, had a beard with a great ruff, and an extended pair of wings. I had never beheld such majestic statues and stepped toward them. A beardless youth in a greenish-brown colored robe held up a hand to stop me.

He gave a quick smile. I know you have been sitting for a long time, but you have to walk only a short distance to our destination.

Like goslings we lined up behind him. We entered the building directly in front of us through a pair of carved, gilded doors, into the cool interior, and through a maze of passageways.

We are almost there, he said reassuringly as two girls behind me began to lag.

A few steps later he unlocked a small door, which opened into an irenic courtyard with stately palms springing out of massive clay pots. There was a collective gasp as we took note of the four glazed brick panels of green- and yellow-winged griffins surrounding us. All six of us girls moved toward the middle waiting to see what would happen next.

Our leader said, I want to introduce you to Hegai. He is in charge of the women’s quarters. It is his decision who will stay and who will be sent home.

I watched the man Hegai advance out of the shadows. He was tall and thin, but had a soft look about him.

Do not be frightened, he said in a strangely high-pitched voice for a man. No harm will come to you. I merely desire to have a good look at you. I want each of you to walk before me, turn around, curtsy, and open your mouth.

As we passed by he squeezed our arms, looked into our mouths, and then patted each of us in turn on the head. What could this strange behavior mean?

When he had finished with the last girl, Hegai clasped his hands behind his back and strolled around us several times. Then he pointed to three girls. You, you, and you, follow Datuhya, and may Ahura Mazda give you safe journey.

They disappeared from sight trailing after Datuhya, the youth we had followed in. I wondered if they were going home or were we? I remembered Father’s wise words. Straightening my back, I waited to see what would become of us.

Hegai gestured toward a pair of stone benches in the shade. Sit.

He pointed to the girl nearest to him. Please tell us your name and where you are from.

The girl he pointed to had fair skin, auburn hair, and startling violet eyes. Her dress, edged with silver birds, peeked out from under a finely woven wool indigo mantle held in place by a gold filigree clasp. How warm she must be.

She cleared her throat, My name is Lydia. I am from Macedonia.

To my delight, the girl next to Lydia was the one with the gaily-decorated sandals. She had a golden complexion, straight-cropped shoulder-length black hair, and eyes the color of polished obsidian. The wide-pleated sleeves of her filmy white linen gown billowed with her every move. Around her slim waist was a fringed sash infused with a cacophony of fuchsia and teal.

I am called Meritptah, from the land of the Nile.

How beautiful they are. Why wasn’t I sent away with the other girls, someone as plain as me? What had I to offer the Great King compared to them?

Everyone turned to stare at me, when I suddenly recalled my promise to not disclose my nationality or family background. What should I say? My head began to spin. I bowed forward slightly. My name is Hadassah. I paused, and then in a flash of inspiration the answer was revealed to me. Father’s work had brought us to Susa; it had nothing to do with me. I am from Babylon, but now dwell in Susa.

Hegai tented his hands and rubbed his manicured fingers together. Good. I have decided you three will enter the royal house of the women. You will go there now. We will pass through the second house of the harem on the way to the first house, where your quarters are located.

What does he mean first and second houses? Isn’t the harem one place?

He led us down a series of long halls to a richly decorated chamber with the highest ceiling I had ever seen. The mud-brick walls were smoothly plastered a most pleasing shade of reddish ocher.

Hegai bowed. Make yourselves comfortable, while I notify the cook of your arrival.

The three of us sat gingerly on the gold-legged chairs doing our best to avoid looking at each other. Lydia sprang from her seat and began to explore the room’s furnishings. She picked up one treasure and then another. Meritptah and I glanced at her and then at each other. We began to giggle and could not stop. I had found a friend, I was sure of it.

Chapter Two

Meritptah and I only stopped giggling when we heard the sound of shuffling feet and murmuring voices. A half dozen serving girls flooded into the room carrying enormous platters of food, which they set down on strategically placed tables in the receiving room. The tantalizing aroma of roasted meat made my mouth water.

Hegai trailed in after them. You must be starved after your long journey.

My journey had not been long, but I suddenly realized I was indeed very hungry. The maids uncovered spicy meat stews, vegetable dishes, saffron rice, fresh fruit, and dates from Egypt, a favorite food of mine.

As we ate, I glanced in Hegai’s direction. He was attired in a soft brown hat and a long, loose outer garment in an unfamiliar cloth. Underneath he wore a pair of light brown anaxyrides, the trousers favored by Persian men, with rows of white horizontal zigzags. On his feet were soft brown leather sandals. He appeared neither young nor old, but had a distinct twinkle in his eyes.

I turned from watching Hegai, and said to the girl seated next to me, Lydia, I am most curious to hear about your homeland and journey to Susa.

She glared at me. It took weeks of harsh travel to get to Susa from my father’s citadel in Macedonia. Under military guard, no less.

Meritptah spoke up, I feel like I have been gone a lifetime from the land of Egypt. I have a gnawing homesickness for my family and the great Nile River that no food can abate.

I had not wanted to leave my home either, but I knew Father was close by. How alone they must feel.

I, too, miss my family and the marshy plain and mountains surrounding my hometown, Lydia said.

While we ate and talked, the servants never stopped refilling our plates and water goblets. I ate until I could not take another bite. A bucktoothed maid tried to give me a few more dates, but I shook my head and began to lick my fingers clean.

As the serving girls cleared away the remnants of our meal, I leaned back against the Tyrian purple cushion and shut my eyes. I wondered what Father was doing? Did he miss me as much as I missed him? What about poor Ustana? We had never been separated before. Would they envy me my fine meal, I wondered?

Remembering where I was, I opened my eyes to take a closer look at my surroundings. I saw Hegai go to the open door, where a short, stocky man in a white linen tunic was standing. The top of his head was bald, surrounded by a wispy fringe of grey hair.

Hegai turned to face us. I hate to intrude upon your conversation, but this is Simmias. He is the king’s chief physician. He came from Athens and is skilled in every form of Greek medicine.

He turned toward Simmias. These three girls have been brought to the citadel of Susa in response to the king’s edict to find a new queen. Their names are Lydia, Meritptah, and Hadassah.

After a slight start, the doctor gave each of us a brief nod as our names were spoken.

Hegai continued, He has come to make sure you are healthy and indeed virgins.

I wondered how he could determine that, but then he was a doctor.

Simmias strolled toward us on stubby legs. He stopped in front of the Macedonian girl. Well! You are Lydia, are you not?

She looked him up and down. Yes, I am Lydia.

The doctor nodded. When and where were you born?

Lydia raised her eyebrows and said in a defiant voice, I was born in Krenids, Macedonia, thirteen years ago.

She seemed about to say more, but the doctor moved closer and grasped her chin with his hand. He