Jungoo: The Making Of A Soldier

Officer

The Call

Iwas standing at the gate of the rail compartment while the train was running at its peak speed leaving behind trees, buildings, men and milestones under the dark sky which was almost ready to pour its shower. I could feel heavy wind forcing me to close my eyes. Every time I tried to breath, I had to inhale with great efforts feeling a sense of liberty and freshness in that wind.

I returned back to my berth and found my father sleeping on his berth. Peace on his face gave immense satisfaction to me. He had given me the best he could and I was sure he would be happy with my efforts to make him proud.

As I slipped under the blanket and looked out through the window glass, my rest craving body forced me to fall asleep instantly.

Moment I slept, I went back into memories recalling my journey from days I was discarded as a failure by everyone including my family for my poor academics result and rowdy activities.

During my school days around six years back, the principal would announce my name in the assembly every day and make me stand outside his chamber, sometimes even kneeling down.

Girls would not speak to me and would vacate the place if I am around. None would ever respond to my advances.

My poor academic performance was a bigger worry for my family. My ailing mother had expressed her displeasure many times and even said she was heartbroken with me just days before her death. Her death had shaken me and I wanted to turn around things and prove my worth. However, this was not an easy task.

My family sent me to a boarding school in Mussoorie after which I went to Shimla for management course. As I approached final semester of my degree course, I realized that the opportunity had arrived to prove my stake.

I passed out of college in 2001, my eyes full of dreams and fire in my blood. But being an average student, I was still exploring career options, looking for ones where I would not have to put in much effort. Many of my course mates were either taking entrance tests to get into an MBA program or other degrees, or, had joined their family businesses. I did not have a family business that would accommodate me. Forced by the lack of opportunities at my disposal, I even applied for positions in a few BPO companies, since they only required communications skills and patience.

My classmate, Upendra, was the son of an army man. He wanted to join the Indian Army like his father. He would tell me stories about life in the army, which fascinated me and I thought of taking the Combined Defence Services (CDS) exams with him. As a child, I used to play with toy guns. My parents preserved many photographs from my childhood, with me dressed as a soldier. It seemed intriguing to find reality in those fantasies, and I decided to try my luck with the Army Selection Exam. I knew that I had to face one written test. Following that, my physical strength would help me sail through. As a sportsman and a karate expert, I was confident of clearing the physical tests rather easily.

Since we had to pay attention to our academics in college, I didn’t have much of an opportunity to prepare for the CDS exam. On a chilly sunny winter’s day in Shimla, Upendra and I appeared for the written exam. On my way to the examination centre, I chanced upon a roadside book shop that sold a book on General Knowledge. I bought it in the hope of giving myself some moral satisfaction for having prepared for the test. Over the 20 minutes-long journey to the test centre, I managed to glance through a few pages of the book, focusing on the current affairs and history sections.

Quite like I expected, the question paper was filled with questions I hadn’t prepared for, and it all went over my head. Had I known that there would be such tough questions I wouldn’t have even considered applying for the CDS exam.

After my initial shock, once I settled down, since I had nothing to lose, I decided to risk attempting all the questions. When I did not know an answer, I used a coin to help pick out the answers after using an elimination method to bring it down to the two closest options.

Over the next few days after finishing my final university examinations, I went back home, to Dhanbad in Jharkhand, where summer was just beginning.

At noon one day, when I was at home aimlessly surfing television channels, the postman arrived at our doorstep. He handed over a registered letter addressed to me from the Union Public Service Commission (UPSC). The letter informed me that I had cleared the written exam. I was asked to be available for the next round, where I was expected to appear before the Service Selection Board (SSB).

Selection in the Army

My family had already begun celebrating after receiving news of my selection. I told them to wait until I got my SSB results, since that was the real deal. I did everything I could to learn about the SSB tests.

I spoke to a school friend of mine, Chetan, who had appeared for the SSB test twice. He helped me prepare, sharing things from his own experience and also giving me study material to help me prepare. I had a month’s time to prepare for it, and I meant business this time.

I started preparing for my physical rounds as well, by running few hundred meters every morning. I also got my railway bookings done for Bhopal, where the tests were going to be held. People in my locality had already started associating me with the army, as they nicknamed me Major Saab, Captain Saab, Brigadier and a host of other similar names.

They had all seen army officers only in the movies, and their aspirations of seeing someone around them in the army soon began to look possible, with my dreams. On the day of my journey to Bhopal, my entire family had come to see me off at the railway station. My grandmother asked me to do my best and wished me good luck. My father and uncles blessed me, while all the other family members gave me tight hugs and wished me luck.

The general perception of an army officer is that he should look compulsorily like Superman- with a broad chest that would sustain dozens of bullets and powerful arms to kill an entire army single-handedly, and handsome enough to mesmerize the ladies while in uniform. I had a similar image in mind, but unfortunately, I didn’t have these attributes in me. I was 5′ 8″ tall, with an average build and looks.

I alighted at the railway station in Bhopal at 11:30 PM. I was extremely tired after travelling for long. I desperately needed to use a restroom to freshen up. I spotted the sign for the men’s waiting room and made a beeline for it.

The moment I entered the waiting room, I found a large number of people filling up the small room, making it tough to find space. Save for a few people, many of the men in the waiting room seemed to be candidates for the SSB test, considering that they were all revising for and discussing the SSB tests aloud.

I listened quietly. Topics for discussion ranged across the board – from filling out the form to tips that would help one score high, from facing the interview panel right up to winning gallantry medals. There were people from almost all parts of the country and many had better physical attributes and good communication skills than me. I thought it would be better if I confined myself to revising for the test from the pamphlets I had with me.

After spending the remainder of the night in the waiting room, at 5:30 AM I noticed some signs of activity on Platform Number 1. There were three men in Army uniform, sitting at a table with a banner saying ‘SSB Candidates’. I went to them with my luggage in tow. I approached the oldest soldier among them. He had two stars and a strip each on both his shoulders.

Good morning, Sir. Is this the place for the SSB candidates?

He stared at me before replying sternly. Can’t you read? It is written on the banner! He then muttered something under his breath.

I was afraid to ask a second question. Somehow, though, gathering strength, I asked him again politely, Where should I go now?

He gave me a stern look and asked me to show him my call letter for the SSB. He examined my papers and asked me to go to the parking lot, where I would find an army bus. I was to sit there. By the time I went there, I found almost 300 candidates lining up. I felt sorry for my family and neighbours – they thought I had achieved plenty by just getting that call letter for this stage.

Everyone, stand here with your luggage! A loud voice called out. It was another army man.

Please load your entire luggage on top of the buses. Keep your call letters in your hand. The voice continued.

Another man in uniform called out. If you miss the bus, remember, you miss the chance. This is not just ordinary civilian life! Move fast and react fast! Improve your reflexes!

I was highly impressed by the way the men were commanding all of us to act. I watched them in awe. It was amazing to admire everything about them - their uniforms, their movements and everything there was about them.

Hi, I am Rohit! A voice sounded out behind me. I turned and found a young boy extending his hand in greeting.

Hello! I replied with a smile. I am Amit. Are you also here for the SSB exam?

Yeah! He said Let’s go on this bus. Come along!

We walked together. There were about thirty people rushing at the entrance of the bus to climb up the bus.

Hey, you! Pass your luggage to me! Come on, fast yaar. We need to be on time! a voice sounded out.

You there! Pass on your suitcase fast, I will take care of it! I heard someone else speak up.

That’s the way to do it, everyone! Come on, co-operate please! came a third voice. I couldn’t help but appreciate these gestures. They were kind enough to extend their help to load our luggage. These boys are so generous! I told Rohit.

Bull shit! a voice sounded behind us. I turned around to see another fellow candidate. This is no generosity. These guys must be here for their second or even third attempt. Or they may be from some coaching institute and they are just trying to show off their OLQ.

OLQ? I asked, surprised.

Officer Like Qualities. These guys are trying to pretend to be helpful and supportive, perhaps assuming that they are being watched.

Do they observe us right from here? I asked.

You never know. They say that they do, but I am not sure when and how they do this. I also showed off some of these OLQs during my first and second attempts. And of course, I didn’t get through. Now, for the past three attempts, I have stopped doing it. It is useless brother, he paused. Actually, no one knows what they really want!

After listening to him, it all seemed like I was chasing a distant dream. I was worried and began looking around to admire the initiators again. If the OLQ was what they were looking for, I had to learn fast.

Hi! I am Sujay, the young man said as he approached me extending his hand. Nice to meet you! The two of you look like first timers. New to the SSB jungle, are we? he asked Rohit and me.

Hello, I am Amit and he is Rohit. I am new and I think he is also new, I am not sure! I replied.

Yeah! Even I am a first-timer, Rohit said.

We handed over our luggage to the OLQ prototype. In a matter of seconds, we found our luggage on top of the bus, neatly arranged. Sujay, Rohit and I hopped onto the bus, and we found a three-seater to sit down at.

Sujay kept up a stream of conversation, telling us about different tests that would be conducted. I thought I was fortunate to have a friend like Sujay so early. He gave us a couple of tips and ideas on the selection procedure too.

Once our conversation died out with each being preoccupied with something of his own, I soon got lost in my fantasies. I looked out of the window. I could still feel the warmth of the military uniform from my childhood days, the ones I wore for a majority of the photographs that were clicked in my growing years. I could feel my fingers and lips shivering with nervousness from time to time. I didn’t want to miss out on the opportunity of realizing my dream of becoming a soldier.

As the bus made its way inside the army cantonment area, I enjoyed watching men in uniform holding guns in their hands. Sujay resumed the explanatory narrative and shared some insights on probable topics for the group discussion.

Once inside the army quarters, the bus navigated its way around and finally stopped in front of an old building that stood amidst a confluence of residential and official buildings. The driver instructed us to get off the bus. We had to take down our luggage and keep our call letters and academic certificates in hand.

Now, you guys must take your luggage and stand there in the queue, Sujay said, pointing in the direction of the queue. And keep your papers ready! We followed his lead.

There were a few men in uniform sitting at a table. We had to show them our documents.

Okay, now. Everyone, pay attention. Each of you in turn will have to pick a number. You will shout out numbers from one to four in sequential order. The first says one, second says two, third says three, fourth says four, and the fifth starts again. This will be repeated until everyone in the queue has a number. Do you get it? We nodded collectively.

The counting began and finished without incident. Alright, now. All candidates with number one please move here. He pointed out to a spot. Candidates with number two will be required to stand there. He pointed to a second empty spot. Candidates with three and four, please assemble here and there respectively. He pointed at two different empty spots. There was some shuffling about until everyone settled into their groups.

Now please note that you are all required to go to the rooms labelled with your numbers. There are five rooms for each number. Candidates under one will go to room number 1 till room number 5, and so on and so forth. Once the rooms appropriate for your number are filled with 15 people, you will be required to go to the next room. We picked up our luggage and made our way. Sujay and I were in the same room, our number was 1. It was my lucky number, and I felt hopeful at the prospect of that room being lucky for me. Rohit went to the room he was allotted.

After we settled in and assembled our things in order, a middle-aged man in a safari suit entered our room.

Good morning everyone I will now brief you on the selection procedure. He took us through the protocols we had to observe, and told us about the tests. I realised that most of it was similar to what Sujay had already told Rohit and me.

He informed that the first day would comprise the screening test and if selected for next rounds the second day would comprise psychological tests, the third and fourth day would comprise physical tests and group tasks and on the fifth day, we would have our conference, where the results would be announced. In the midst of all this, we were to have our personal interview on any of the days - in the afternoons or in the evenings.

The screening test lasted for almost three hours with Intelligence Test, Picture Perception Test followed by the Discussion Test, Situation Reaction Test, Story Telling and Group Discussions.

I was preoccupied with my performance, but Sujay seemed more interested in the others’ performances. He asked me about my performance and my expectations from it.

I don’t know! I said. I hope my answers are correct and of course, you already know about my group discussion, you were there yourself. I can’t say anything, really! I replied with all my genuine confusion clouding my mind.

I don’t think you stand a chance, Amit. You didn’t participate much in the group discussion, and a lot of things that you did say didn’t quite make sense. I don’t think you will make it to the next round, Sujay reflected.

It scared me – especially because he was experienced and had seen many candidates succeed and fail before him. I took his assessment seriously.

I felt my heart racing. I stood at the cusp of my dreams – and things could go either way. I came outside to sit down among the others while they discussed and evaluated their performances at the fag end when the announcements were to be made.

Half an hour after all the assessments were over, it was time for the results. The middle-aged man emerged from inside the evaluation room and asked everyone to stand in their groups.

All of you chose the army as your career. It is a commendable effort. Now, we are here to announce the results of the screening test. Those of you who are selected will remain here for the next four days for further tests. Those who have not cleared this level will return home. Either way, please reimburse your ticket fares from the accounts office. I will now call out the names of those selected. Please leave your group and stand over here in a separate queue. He pointed to a space to his left. The nervousness among the candidates was palpable.

The selected candidates from Group 4 are. He began. Almost immediately, the collective anticipation rose. He called out the names of the selected candidates. From Group 2, I saw that Rohit was selected. Finally, it was my group’s turn. I was really scared by now. Vinay Seth, Ajay Gupta, Sumit Saxena… As the list of names grew, I looked at Sujay, upset and nervous that my name hadn’t been called. He was tense, too, but in a better condition than I was in. I kept my head bowed, staring at the ground.

Amit Lal! He announced.

I looked up, uncomprehending. The next few moments went by in a blur as I joined the queue of men who were selected. One more name was announced after mine – but it was not Sujay. He was rejected, again. He was disheartened and stood rooted with his head down. I felt helpless, I had to stand here and I could not console him.

Now, I would like to request all of you to go to the Quarter Master room to get your ticket fares reimbursed. Selected candidates will be given a chest number. You have to wear it for your entire stay here. Your identity will be defined by your chest numbers only. You will also be given room numbers for your stay and will be told about other rules and guidelines shortly. Those who have not been selected may please proceed to the railway station.

I immediately made my way towards Sujay. He was already making his way to collect his luggage and leave. He seemed silent, but content. We exchanged our contact details and I saw him off beside the buses that were waiting to take them back to the railway station. Rohit and I then went to the Quarter Master’s Office to collect our reimbursements. We were also given our itineraries for the sequence of events that would be conducted over the next four days. We were given our chest numbers. A rectangular piece of white cloth with numbers printed in black was handed out to each candidate, and we were expected to pin this onto our shirts. My number was 28 – I was happy once again, because the digits added up to result in my lucky number, 1.

I went to the barracks with Rohit. There were a few orderlies there who guided us on what we had to do the next day onwards. We were to report the next morning at 05:00 AM at the Group Task (GT) Ground. We relaxed for the remainder of the day and retired early for the night.

The next morning, a loud sound woke us all up at 4:00 AM. The toilets and bathrooms were packed and long queues snaked outside them. Somehow I managed to get a place near the open water tank to change and complete my morning ablutions.

We assembled in the halls to take many rounds of physiological tests based on Self Description, Situation Reaction Test, Thematic Appreciation Test, Word Association Test and the like.

Being an easy day, we even managed to get an evening out pass to visit the Bhopal market. Though my group managed to return back in time, two other candidates took it casually and got late after they spent time in indulging in drinks in a local bar. They were immediately disqualified and had to return home.

Our third morning was moist and foggy. We were made to stand in a line and wait for instructions. Over the entire span of the day, we had a slew of physical tests to measure our fitness and endurance levels. We also had to participate in a snake race as a team building exercise – groups of ten were given a fake snake made out of sacks to hold onto, and to chart an obstacle course and complete the race. At any given time, a minimum of six people had to hold onto the snake without putting it on the ground. It was fun to watch OLQ types making all kinds of efforts to project themselves at each stage, just to be noticed by the officer.

Once