Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    One Hundred Great Great Jokes
    One Hundred Great Great Jokes
    One Hundred Great Great Jokes
    Ebook107 pages1 hour

    One Hundred Great Great Jokes

    By Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    This is a compilation of one hundred (generally inoffensive) jokes, some short, some long. Each joke is given a title and is numbered, and there is a list of the jokes by title and a list by number.
    They vary in length - from very short (a couple of lines) to fairly long (more than a couple of lines).
    After the main body of jokes there is a section which explains each one for readers who might not have fully understood the joke.
    This could be useful for readers who are not native speakers of English - or even readers from other parts of the English-speaking world where the humour (or humor) of some jokes may be incomprehensible or opaque or even missing.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherEbenezer Jackson-Firefly
    Release dateNov 5, 2015
    ISBN9781310574771
    One Hundred Great Great Jokes

    Read more from Ebenezer Jackson Firefly

    Related to One Hundred Great Great Jokes

    Titles in the series (30)

    View More
    View More

    Related ebooks

    Humor & Satire For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      Memoirs of an Ass: Part 2

      Mar 14, 2018

      Memoirs of an Ass: Part 2
      8 min read

    • Article

      Staff Picks: Detritus, Dreamin’, Dinos

      Jul 14, 2017

      From Paleoart.   First published in 1966, Mr. Clemens and Mark Twain, by Justin Kaplan, is still the standard biography of our most enduringly funny writer—or, at least, the earliest writer who makes me actually laugh. I avoided it till now because I

      5 min read

    • Article

      Letters

      Jan 27, 2022

      CONTACT US BY POST: PO BOX 1200, WHITSTABLE CT1 9RH, OR E-MAIL SIEVEKING@FORTEANTIMES.COM PLEASE PROVIDE US WITH YOUR POSTAL ADDRESS Although I was very happy to see my two ShukerNature books receive a positive joint review [FT411:65], I have to corr

      7 min read

    • Article

      More Than Meets The Eye

      Nov 3, 2022

      More Than Meets The Eye
      8 min read

    • Article

      The Book that Made the Bard: 400 Years of Shakespeare’s Folio

      Nov 8, 2023

      The Folio is our gateway to Shakespeare; it's also a cautionary tale. The post The Book that Made the Bard: 400 Years of Shakespeare’s Folio appeared first on The Millions.

      9 min read

    • Article

      Stop! Hammock Time

      Aug 1, 2018

      Stop! Hammock Time
      8 min read

    • Article

      Chapter And Verse On The Unknowable Bard

      Nov 30, 2023

      OUR ISLE MAY BE SCEPTRED, OUR PLOTblessed, but in one respect we English have been rather unlucky. In Dante the Italians have a poet who feels knowable: anyone who glances at the Divine Comedy becomes privy to his likes and dislikes, his tastes and h

      4 min read

    • Article

      Shelf Life

      Sep 2, 2021

      Shelf Life
      4 min read

    • Article

      A Year in Reading: Daniel Levin Becker

      Dec 17, 2019

      This year, I read in twos. Maybe this is always happening and I just started noticing. I also have a brain that’s unrepentantly hungry for patterns, so who knows. The post A Year in Reading: Daniel Levin Becker appeared first on The Millions.

      7 min read

    • Article

      The World Of Writing

      May 5, 2022

      ‘As a romantic suspense writer, I spend a lot of time thinking about murder…’ began a blog post many of us will surely relate to, on the See Jane Publish blog. The writer, US romance novelist Nancy Crampton-Brophy, went on, ‘Divorce is expensive, and

      4 min read

    • Article

      5 Great Book Picks for Gift-Giving This Holiday Season

      Dec 7, 2017

      'Inside Animal Hearts and Minds' by Belinda Recio and 'Shahnameh' by A. Ferdowsi are two books that would make ideal gifts this year.

      3 min read

    • Article

      The World The Book Can Build

      Oct 13, 2021

      The World The Book Can Build
      12 min read

    • Article

      What We Loved This Week

      Aug 17, 2018

      What We Loved This Week
      4 min read

    • Article

      Chinese Rhymes

      Mar 28, 2018

      Everybody who cares anything for old poetry in English knows how it feels—knows how awful it feels—when a poem is rhyming away and then suddenly the rhyme goes off the rails for a second because English pronunciation has changed since the time the po

      6 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for One Hundred Great Great Jokes

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      One Hundred Great Great Jokes - Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly

      One Hundred Great Great Jokes

      By Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly

      Copyright 2015 Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly

      Smashwords Edition

      Front Cover Text: One Hundred Great Great Jokes / Readers’ Comments / My eyes hurt (A READER IMPRESSED BY OUR FRONT-COVER DESIGN FOR THIS BOOK OF JOKES) / My eyes don’t hurt (A MAN WHO ALWAYS WEARS SUNGLASSES TO READ JOKES) / A great great book ABIMELECH JACKSON-FIREFLY (no relation to the author) / A great great book NEHEMAIH JACKSON-FIREFLY (no relation to the author) / A red-letter day is any day of special significance. In Antiquity, for example in Roman times, important days in the calendar were indicated in red. Even today many calendars indicate special dates and holidays in red instead of black. (A WOMAN WHO IS NOT ASHAMED OF WIKI-PLAGIARISM) / Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly / A great great book ZADOK JACKSON-FIREFLY (no relation to the author)

      COPYRIGHT: This book should not really be copied as Mr Jackson-Firefly has toiled and laboured for many a long week to put it together, in spite of his precarious living conditions and his eccentric habits.

      It seems that he would prefer the book to be purchased rather than copied and freely distributed, or bundled with packets of crisps or beer in supermarket promotions.

      A little income might allow him to have two pennies to rub together (an ambition of his ever since he found that pennies were still in use in commercial transactions), and maybe to have a new teabag every two days rather than every three at present for his many cups of tea.

      We appreciate your cooperation in helping the author inflict his works onto the public and try to derive vast amounts of cash from them. All the above was probably written by Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly himself, but as you will now note, it is attributed to 'The Editor’.

      The Editor.

      LIST OF CONTENTS

      1. INTRODUCTION

      2. CONTENTS: JOKES BY TITLE

      3. CONTENTS: JOKES 1601-1700 ACCORDING TO NUMBER

      The jokes begin here:

      4. ONE HUNDRED JOKES

      5. DON’T GET IT? THE JOKES EXPLAINED

      Here is the introduction to One Hundred Great Great Jokes:

      1. INTRODUCTION

      This is the fifteenth collection of ‘jokes’ (a joke is usually a short amusing humorous anecdote with a punch line – the culminating point of such an anecdote that is the climax of its funniness) (We are not sure if the hundred little incidents narrated here can really be called ‘jokes’ because, we are told, they do not conform exactly to this definition, which seems to require them to be amusing and humorous).

      The author of this fifteenth little book is the well-known and well-loved Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly (an alternative name adopted by Eben Jackfire, which in turn was a false name adopted by Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly to throw the tax authorities off his trail).

      The great man’s first three joke books were published in ancient times, in the year 2012 (twenty-twelve as pedants would have it). Three books, with five hundred jokes in all, burst forth, the following year, in 2013 (in twenty-thirteen, or two thousand and thirteen for the less pedantically inclined) seven more volumes flowed from the quill pen of the illustrious scribbler. This brought the total to one thousand two hundred jokes in elegant and polished English, where ‘should of’ is never seen for ‘should have’, and ‘their’ and ‘there’ are carefully distinguished, as are ‘your’ and ‘you’re’, not to mention ‘it’s’ and ‘its’.

      Firefly (a shortened form of Mr. Ebenezer Jackson-Firefly’s full name) has asked me to refer to the total of ‘one thousand two hundred’ as comma alpha kappa, as it would be written in Firefly’s preferred Classical Greek numbering system, albeit in Greek letters, of course. But I won’t.

      The total remained at comma alpha kappa all through 2014. The books from that year, numbers twelve to nineteen (eight in all), were unfortunately lost when a family of mice shredded the manuscripts in the middle drawer of my desk to make themselves some bedding.

      At least, this is what I told the eminent jokester having found that I had only a single copy of each on an external hard disk, which went dead and took all its contents with it to the afterlife.

      Much to his chagrin (SHA-grin, or, as his American cousin Ebenezer Jackson-Stoffschneider would have it, shuh-GRIN) he had to accept this particular blow dealt by fate, and he set out to rewrite and recreate these works using his stack of thumb-index spiral-bound notebooks. I believe that as a result the new versions are even better than the old ones. (In fact, they’re much worse, but I believe in positive thinking).

      The missing volumes became known as the Octateuch among his many readers. It seems that these readers took the name from the field of Biblical studies, where it refers to the first eight books of the Bible - the Book of Genesis, the Book of Exodus, the Book of Leviticus, the Book of Numbers, the Book of Deuteronomy, the Book of Joshua, the Book of Judges and the Book of Ruth. Firefly (if I may call him that again) has suggested that these eight books of the Bible, regarded as a unity, might be renamed after the first letters of each book as the ‘GENEXOLENÚMDE JOJÚRU’. In this way it would be clear that the ‘Oktateuch’ are the eight missing joke books.

      But things move apace, and seven new books were published in 2015, three of which were reconstituted from Firefly’s jotters, and so the Octateuch was reduced to a Pentateuch (or, in the field of Biblical studies, a GENEXOLENÚMDE).

      And with this new volume that you are now reading, the published reconstitutions have now become four – a Tetrateuch. For Biblical scholars, the Tetrateuch is the Pentateuch without the fifth book, the Book of Deuteronomy; in other words, the GENEXOLÉNUM, if Firefly’s views eventually prevail.

      We are still missing books 12, 16, 17 and 18, viz. the Book of One Hundred Merry Jokes, the Book of One Hundred Whimsically Whimsical Jokes, the Book of One Hundred Insane Jokes and. the Book of One Hundred Very Curious Jokes. They are being reconstituted in the corner of my office at this very moment, as I spy the quill of our author waving back and forth and I hear it scratching its way across the parchment.

      And that is not all. Because now I see that TWO quills are moving, and TWO nibs are scratching away. This means that the polymath, polyhistor and ambidextron is working simultaneously on his reconstitutions and on the new book in the series, ‘One Hundred Even More Gloriouser Jokes’.

      The title has been criticised by many English-language enthusiasts, and also by some authors who are household names, with whom Firefly is in permanent disagreement. However, it has the sanction of children up to the age of five, and also William Shakespeare (Repose you there; while I to this hard house, More harder than the stones whereof 'tis raised. The words of Kent to King Lear in Act Three, Scene 2, of King Lear).

      I have here a couple of notes pinned, with an oversized drawing pin, into my desk top which outline issues that Firefly would like me to include in the Introduction, as he is unable to get them published elsewhere.

      One is a letter to a local newspaper which the editor has refused to print. Mr Firefly has heard the first cuckoo of the year and has informed the Editor of the Gazette of this fact, of great interest to the ornithologically minded. The Editor has returned the

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1