Butterflies & Blues
By Poetic Ray
()
About this ebook
-When it comes to emotions there are no structures. There are no names for every single feeling. There are no chapters signifying sameness. You can wake up every day with a different sentiment about the same thing. When it comes to love and pain...butterflies and blues... you just never know how it’ll flow through you.
Such is love.
Such is life.
Such is this collection.
Poetic Ray
Rachel spent most of her youth in South Carolina, but it was in Georgia where she found her pen. She began writing regularly at the age of 17. She later earned the name Poetic Ray. Venturing into spoken word, Poetic Ray performed on Atlanta's own radio station V-103 three years in a row, and she graced the mic at several spoken word venues: Apache Cafe, Mocha Match, Vibes Nightclub, etc. Her first book of poems was self published through blurb.com, followed by 4 others and 2 novelettes titled Consequences and Repercussions. She is working on several novels: one, the completion the first two! Poetic Ray is also a writer of stage plays and songs, and she plans to produce a spoken word cd in the future. She earned her BA in English in 2014.
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Butterflies & Blues - Poetic Ray
Butterflies & Blues
(Poetic Heartbeats of a Bipolar Lover)
Life isn’t fueled by the flutter of butterfly wings, and blues don’t only sing in the sky.
~Poetic Ray
I’ve asked myself over and over why I’d dedicate an entire book to hard feelings on the wrong side of love. I had to figure out a reason.
Well I figured out the reason.
This is to remind me of what I never want to experience again… how I never want to hurt this way again… why I never want to love this wrong again. This is to remind me to be kinder to myself and live.
I lived for the butterflies, but I died from the blues.
I’ve watched butterflies revive
And learn to breathe as they flapped their wings against heartbeats
During the briefest moment of eye contact
That caused strings to attach
I’ve witnessed all kinds of magic
And I think it’s tragic
To have experienced such a thing with so many nonbelievers
Of sparks and stars
Those who never hear the theme music in backgrounds…
We go back and forth
Between brick and pine
But we can find possibilities
In made up minds
…if only we knew
He loves me
Especially
The same…
The same as he ‘loved’ every other dame
Lovelessly…
In a way that sucked the melody right out of the song I was sure everybody could sing along to
Yeah he loves me
Especially
The same
Which is not at all
The love of my life went and got himself a wife
But he wants me to hold his hand
The one without the wedding band
Slightly flawed with scars and false promises
And while it is on his right side, it is wrong
As the one ‘left’ upholds his vows
He takes that hand and builds a life with firewalls
And no windows for the truth to be seen
But textually, yeah I know what marriage means
Forever and all sorts of other shared dreams
Leaving the nightmares for me
Because he knows that I love him
So why would I let him grieve
He paints a picture of a monster with whom he sleeps
Yet he continues to lay with her forever
Begging me to hang in the balance for his whenever and whatever
All the echoes that resonates the sound of never
Sounds that I’m not supposed to hear
In this bubble of supposed love
He won’t leave me be and I won’t push or shove him away
It hurts like heaven being sent to hell everyday
So I hold his hand
The one without the wedding band
And I try to ignore the fact that the