Everand Logo

Welcome to Everand!

  • Discover millions of ebooks, audiobooks, and so much more with a free trial

    Only $11.99/month after trial. Cancel anytime.

    Bite Me!
    Bite Me!
    Bite Me!
    Ebook298 pages4 hours

    Bite Me!

    By David J. Wighton

    ()

    Read preview

    About this ebook

    Bite Me will introduce readers to Jak and the Beanstalk, a pair of women assassins who are searching for Scandinavia's Princess Freya. In addition to being trained killers, each has a secret pastime that suggests that they are sociopaths. Readers might wonder why they should be concerned about Scandinavian sociopaths. Patience is a virtue.

    Spurred on by Marie's desire to eat a meal with her former slave masters, the Wilizy are planning to put all Safe Haven's slave ranches out of business. This will not be easy. The Big Mommas and Daddies of those ranches will use the dog collars to kill all of their slaves immediately if they see any sign of an impending attack. Fortunately, the Wilizy have weapons of mass digestion, namely three panthers, two wolves and a dragon.

    Beanstalk discovers Princess Freya without any guards and riding a small horse in a BC river valley. It would be an easy shot for a trained sniper. Or, she could order a platoon of Scandinavian solders to attack the place where she is hiding. Jak had already killed her mother, the queen. Now it was the princess' turn.

    The Wilizy had no idea that two assassins and a platoon of soldiers were looking for the former princess of Scandinavia, now the queen. Why would they care? Most of them were far away attacking Safe Haven. They didn't know that Maddy, the girl they had adopted, and Queen Freya were the same person.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherDavid J. Wighton
    Release dateSep 9, 2016
    ISBN9781370249923
    Bite Me!
    Author

    David J. Wighton

    David Wighton is a retired educator who enjoys writing youth novels when he's not on a basketball court coaching middle-school girls. The books in his Wilizy series peek at how people lived after the word's governments collapsed in the chaos that followed the catastrophic rise in ocean levels and the disappearance of the world's last deposits of oil. Luckily today, in the 2080s, the citizens of Alberta are safe because their It's Only Fair society uses brain-bands to zap people whenever they break a rule. That way, all children grow up knowing the difference between right and wrong. Unfortunately, they're also taught that women's ankles need to be covered so that men can't see them and turn into perverts. Plus, no-one in Alberta can have babies any more because the government manufactures them in a way that ensures that no child has an unfair advantage over any other child. All of this makes sense to Alberta's dictator, but not to Will and Izzy – two teenagers who are decidedly different from everyone else.Wighton's novels have strong teenage characters driving the plot and facing challenges that, in many respects, are no different from what teenagers face today. His novels are intended to entertain and readers will find adventure, romance, suspense, humour, a strong focus on family, plus a touch of whimsy. Wighton also writes to provoke a little thought about life in today's societies and what the future might bring. Teachers may find the series useful in the classroom and the novels are priced with that intent in mind.

    Read more from David J. Wighton

    Related to Bite Me!

    Titles in the series (51)

    View More
    View More

    Related ebooks

    YA Science Fiction For You

    View More
    View More

    Related podcast episodes

    Related articles

    • Article

      The Arrangements: Coming of Age with Books

      Jun 26, 2018

      1.  “How many of you still play with dolls?” Depending on our moods: We rolled our eyes; we buried our burning faces in our arms; we groaned; we shrieked; we wished to be elsewhere; we were present. In the exact middle of eighth grade (the season in

      5 min read

    • Article

      The Family Business

      Oct 7, 2020

      The Family Business
      9 min read

    • Article

      “I Miss Dad Every Single Day”

      Jun 15, 2022

      “I Miss Dad Every Single Day”
      5 min read

    • Article

      Heart Of A Lion

      Nov 4, 2020

      Heart Of A Lion
      10 min read

    • Article

      Sue & Saroo BRIERLEY Heart Of A Lion

      Nov 4, 2020

      Sue & Saroo BRIERLEY Heart Of A Lion
      10 min read

    • Article

      What a Nanny Knows

      Apr 29, 2022

      What a Nanny Knows
      3 min read

    • Article

      Thought-provoking Reads

      Aug 12, 2022

      By HOMBAKAZI MERCY NQANDEKA Jonathan Ball This is a fascinating and very accessible guide to Xhosa culture. Concerned that her heritage is going to be lost to future generations, writer and agriculturalist Hombakazi Mercy Nqandeka has compiled this

      2 min read

    • Article

      The Golden Key

      Feb 26, 2020

      The Golden Key
      5 min read

    • Article

      Reclaimedjanes

      Apr 8, 2022

      Reclaimedjanes
      2 min read

    • Article

      Q&A with Bonnie

      Apr 21, 2023

      ◗ Elizabeth Zott is a character we would all love to know or even become. Where did such a personality spring from? Fury! I started Lessons in Chemistry about seven years ago. I’d just come out of a meeting, irritated by some garden variety sexism, a

      6 min read

    • Article

      The Shortest Day

      Oct 13, 2017

      The Shortest Day
      10 min read

    • Article

      10 Literary Witches To Hex Trump

      Mar 24, 2017

      In case you hadn’t heard, witches across America—including Lana Del Rey—are uniting to take down Trump via a binding spell, which calls on the spirits to keep the President from doing harm (it already seems to be working). Covens, communities, and so

      5 min read

    • Article

      A WING AND a prayer

      Sep 28, 2021

      A raven saved my life Cate McMurray, 47, from West Midlands I ’d always known I was different. As a small child, I used to see and hear people who weren’t there. One day, I was playing hide ‘n’ seek with my two sisters, and tucked myself away in a cu

      4 min read

    • Article

      Bestselling Author Naomi Wood Wins 2023 BBC National Short Story Award

      Sep 26, 2023

      Naomi Wood has won the 2023 BBC national short story award for Comorbidities, a story about a married couple struggling to maintain their sex life who eventually decide to make a sex tape. The bestselling author and UEA creative writing lecturer was

      19 min read

    • Article

      Dolly’s Star Turn

      Jul 12, 2023

      Dolly’s Star Turn
      7 min read

    • Article

      Dolly’s Star Turn

      Aug 9, 2023

      Dolly’s Star Turn
      7 min read

    • Article

      Dolly’s Star Turn

      Jul 12, 2023

      Dolly’s Star Turn
      7 min read

    • Article

      Mother Courage

      May 20, 2020

      Mother Courage
      8 min read

    • Article

      Mother Courage

      Apr 22, 2020

      Mother Courage
      8 min read

    • Article

      READER Reviews

      Aug 4, 2020

      by Enid Blyton (Hodder Children’s Books, £6.99) Review by Amber, age eleven Malory Towers is about life in a boarding school. Darrell Rivers is a courageous twelve-year-old girl who joins the school in the summer term of the first year and quickl

      5 min read

    • Article

      Editor’s Letter

      Feb 25, 2022

      Editor’s Letter
      2 min read

    • Article

      Gretel Killeen

      Mar 8, 2021

      Gretel Killeen
      2 min read

    Related categories

    Reviews for Bite Me!

    0 ratings

    0 ratings0 reviews

    What did you think?

    Tap to rate

    Review must be at least 10 words

      Book preview

      Bite Me! - David J. Wighton

      Chapter 1

      Mommy's back, Madison declared as Winnie ambled through the door. The word Mommy stopped Winnie dead in her tracks. It was May 3, 2086 – two days after Winnie and Reese had saved Maddy from dying in an abandoned animal lair. Winnie didn't remember giving birth to a five year old girl in the last couple of days. She had been up north sorting out which male wolves would become romantically engaged in creating wolf babies with Patella and Scapula. Winnie was matchmaking again, but this time within the animal kingdom.

      Winnie looked up to see Reese sprawled on the cushioned sofa, a well-worn picture book in his hands, and a sort-of-daughter perched contentedly on his knees. Winnie mind-messaged him, Mommy? Really?

      I'm Daddy. I'm glad you're back. Madison clutches my hand and follows me around everywhere. Sometimes she stands on my feet, clamps onto my legs, and won't get off. I have to carry her on my feet if I want to go anywhere.

      You should have messaged me.

      Mom was going to do that today. She wanted you to have at least one day of freedom before you became a mommy.

      She's kidding, right?

      I dunno. What I do know is that I'm too young to be a daddy.

      Mommy!

      Winnie felt two arms around her waist and looked down. A blond head was nuzzled into her tummy. For a little kid, Maddy was remarkably strong. Hi Maddy.

      I'm Madison, she corrected.

      OK. Hi, Madison. Uh, could you relax your arms a bit so that I can breathe?

      Madison did. But that pause allowed her to put a foot on top of each of Winnie's feet. Daddy's been teaching me how to read. What are we going to do now?

      Winnie looked up, but Reese had disappeared. Coward! When did she start talking?

      Reese didn't reply.

      Pick me up? Madison lifted her arms into the air while remaining balanced precariously on Winnie's two small feet.

      Why don't you walk beside me? We'll find Mom.

      Who's Mom?

      The one who keeps the house neat.

      Oh. That's Daddy's mommy. She's my granny.

      Reese!

      I didn't tell her that. She figured it out on her own.

      Is Mom mad at us? Reese? Reese?

      Back to the Table of Contents

      Chapter 2

      No, Yolanda wasn't mad. But she was insistent that Winnie find Madison's real parents and reunite them with Madison. And do that quickly! What was happening right now was not healthy!

      Winnie played with Madison in the house for the rest of the morning, made lunch for the two of them, and then played some more active games in the yard.

      Are you tired yet? Winnie asked hopefully. Would you like to have a short nap?

      I'm never having a nap again!

      Madison seemed quite determined about that, so Winnie asked Yolanda to watch Madison while she and Marie tried to find her parents. As soon as Winnie disappeared, Yolanda told Reese to come out of hiding and take care of his daughter. Some people might believe that Yolanda was enjoying having two of her children learn what it was like to be a parent. They'd be right.

      Winnie and Marie returned to the compound later that evening and reported to Yolanda and the rest of the Wilizy that Madison's parents were dead. Winnie didn't think it was necessary to time-travel into the couple's past to learn anything more. But your friendly narrator knows the full story of Madison's parents and I see no reason to keep that from my readers. I'll start with how Madison's mom (Ashleigh) met Madison's dad (Sam) and I'll end the story with how they died. Just remember. Winnie and the Wilizy family do not know any of this yet. In time, they'll know the full story.

      # # # # # # # #

      The stunning young woman who would become known as Ashleigh was standing nude inside a square of four full-length ornate mirrors, staring at herself one day in October, 2077. This was nine and a half years before Winnie and Reese would become Madison's parents. The four mirrors were arranged so that the young woman could see any part of her body without having to move her head more than a quarter turn. She had just finished her hour of physical training; checking her body for imperfections afterwards was part of the routine.

      As the young woman expected, the body was perfect. It went well with the face which was perfect too. That wasn't just her opinion. Everybody agreed that she had the perfect face and the perfect body. How long the body would remain perfect would be determined by events not entirely within the young woman's control. She did have control over one thing though.

      "The body will not bear children." The young woman had made that stipulation abundantly clear to her uncle who had assigned his staff to find a suitable husband for her. She had no shortage of suitors, but few of them had the necessary genes. Although she refused to bear children, the young woman placed no ban on having sex in her marriage. After all, her name could be traced back to the Goddess of Love and Beauty. Having sex was taken for granted. She'd have plenty of children but she wasn't going to mar her perfect body by putting it through the agonizing absurdity of childbirth. It would be up to others to hammer out how her children would be born.

      The perfect body wasn't called Ashleigh at this point. The perfect body's name was Freya.

      # # # # # # # #

      A suitable husband candidate was identified in late 2078. He came from an acceptable family – one that had the right genes plus ample money. At twenty, the man was appropriately attractive and sufficiently intelligent. Freya tried him out in bed. Sex for her wasn't for romance; it was just a way to give the body an energetic workout. He had stamina; he'd do. His name was Samuel.

      One test of his acceptability remained. A quest, if you like. Not the kind of quest where a knight had to slay a ferocious dragon. This particular knight did not have a shiny coat of armour, a bejeweled sword, a gallant steed, or any of those other symbols of the chivalrous age when a knight's primary purpose in life was to rescue beautiful damsels in distress. This knight wore a white lab coat, required thick glasses to see, and bustled off to his workplace on foot. In his quest, he would arm himself with test tubes to slay the not-so-mythical dragon that he faced. The dragon he had to overcome had an unconventionally long name. How to produce a perfect baby without leaving a mark on the mother's perfect body.

      In preparation for his quest, the knight-suitor took a long trip to consult with an expert in his field. She was helpful and gave him custom-made equipment to take back with him. On his return, Samuel's people and Freya's people reached an agreement. The marriage would be allowed to proceed on condition that Samuel produced a perfect baby girl without marring the body in any way. The baby would be named Freya. For motivational purposes, he was granted temporary visiting privileges with the body.

      Freya's daughter made her grand entrance into the world of the living on June 6, 2080. Freya, the mother, was otherwise occupied at the time, but that snippet of information was not made public. A marriage certificate was backdated to nine months plus one day previous. Life changed for Freya with that birth. Not because she had to care for her baby daughter; she had servants for that grubby chore. Instead, with another perfect body in the family, albeit a miniature one, Freya's future role in life was now confirmed. She would assume responsibility for the family business.

      For Samuel, life did not change all that much after his daughter's birth. He still wore a white lab coat and glasses. He still walked to work. But he had a much shorter commute now because he lived in his wife's house and worked in the basement. His quest had been expanded. Produce more babies for Freya. Lots of them at a time. Samuel found the scientific challenge invigorating. He didn't need motivational sex. That was best for everybody since Freya had other things on her mind besides sex. She was managing the family business – the kingdom of Scandinavia. Technically right now, it was a queendom, but even in 2080, equality of women had not yet made it into the approved vocabulary of constitutional monarchies.

      # # # # # # # #

      By June 2081 when little Princess Freya celebrated her first birthday, Queen Freya's idyllic life had unravelled. She still had her perfect body, she still draped it in expensive luxurious clothes, and she still exercised an hour every day. But affairs of state consumed a ridiculous amount of time. Her parents may have been willing to dedicate their lives to affairs of state when they had been ruling the country; Freya was not. She asked her uncle to resume his role as Prince Regent. He insisted that he couldn't. The laws of the country made her the queen. Freya continued to attend all the required formalities. Most of the time she didn't understand what the meetings were about. She had been raised to be beautiful and regal, not intelligent.

      Queen Freya knew from the meetings that tensions within her country were increasing; their slide into depravity was accelerating. Freya lived within a democracy governed by a parliament. Even a monarch could have little impact. She believed her uncle when he predicted that the country as she knew it now would not be there for Princess Freya. Queen Freya saw ample evidence that he'd be right.

      Freya found her public duties difficult to perform because she had to do so without revealing her distaste of some of the people in attendance. Even looking out the windows of her city palace would bring the foul taste of bile to her mouth. Pockets of the disease were visible even in the crowds that were no further away than the other side of the security gates. She couldn't look out her own windows without being reminded of what was happening to her country! Disease was everywhere!

      Scandinavia's entire military apparatus was stretched to the limit in attempts to cope with the disease. The country's security presence throughout the borders had been successful in making it difficult for more disease carriers to enter the country. But Freya ruled over a large country bounded by miles and miles of deserted coastline. [Narrator: Scandinavia was the amalgamation of the two former countries of Sweden and Norway.] Their entire armed forces, and almost all of their security budget, were committed to keeping their borders secure. The pestilence was easily detected and the carriers could be caught and turned away. But as soon as the security forces detected and closed one gap in their armour, disease carriers would create another. Their pressure on the borders was relentless.

      Special Ops, a secret and impressively big unit within Queen Freya's military forces, had an answer for her. They agreed that it was impossible to imprison or deport the disease carriers who had managed to enter the country already. But similar to AIDS in the previous century, this disease was spread by carriers having sex. The more carriers that were in the country, the more babies they'd have. Once a baby was conceived, that baby would carry the pestilence. There was no known cure.

      Special Ops argued that if security forces couldn't do anything after diseased children had been conceived, their focus rightly should be on preventing disease carriers from conceiving children. This could be done quietly and painlessly with secretly distributed chemicals. The head of Special Ops characterized it as a form of vaccination. Carriers would not be hurt. But neither would they ever have children again. In time, the disease's penetration of their society would slow and eventually disappear. Patience would win out in the end.

      Special Ops had been working successfully for years on a pilot program that would increase the number of the children in the country who were disease-free. But the officer in charge of that program told Queen Freya that they were finding it difficult to expand that program to meet the growing demands that the country had for healthy children. If Queen Freya were to double their budget, that would give them the additional staff and resources they'd need to increase the number of disease-immune children. Meanwhile their chemical program would be preventing the carriers of the disease from producing more diseased children. The country could be made healthy again. Not immediately, but the country could be free of pestilence in time for Princess Freya's reign.

      Spare no effort, Queen Freya ordered the head of her Special Ops Division. Do whatever it takes. The future of our country depends on you!

      # # # # # # # #

      One year later, two year old Princess Freya was celebrating her birthday on a utilitarian yacht that was making its way slowly from Scandinavia to North America. The year had not been kind to her mother. Officially, the queen was having a difficult pregnancy and was seeking medical expertise outside of the country. Unofficially, she wasn't even pregnant. Prince Samuel had told his wife that another perfect baby daughter was possible whenever she wanted it. [Narrator: Since Samuel was not the head of the country, he could not be called King. He had to be a Prince instead.] Freya wanted more from him than another perfect daughter. She wanted multiple simultaneous births, the better to increase the number of healthy children in the country. Naturally she insisted that these births were to be achieved without leaving a mark on the body. Samuel confessed that the science wasn't ready yet. One of the reasons for visiting America was so that he could gain access to the Americans' advanced computer technology.

      Queen Freya had a much more pressing reason to leave the country. Her security personnel had advised her that the royal family's continued presence in the Stockholm palace posed a health risk not only for them but for their security personnel as well. Since both she and Prince Samuel spoke English fluently, why didn't they go to the United States for an extended holiday? The royal yacht could take them that far quite easily.

      Queen Freya had resisted, but the army's Chief of Staff had the winning argument. The public had learned how some unknown chemicals were being used on the pestilence carriers. In response, the pestilence carriers had purchased the influence of some sleazy politicians who were raising howls of protest about the rights of all people to determine for themselves if they wanted to have health vaccinations or not. The country's majority government was firmly in power, but so long as Queen Freya remained in the palace, the public protests would continue. It was best that she leave the country so that the armed forces could take back control of the streets. She needn't concern herself with how they were going to do that. The army's Chief of Staff could talk to Queen Freya like that with impunity. He was her uncle – the former prince regent.

      The royal family left Scandinavia secretly at the end of May 2082. In order to maintain a degree of anonymity in the U.S., the royal couple travelled in a stripped down yacht with only two members of the military to guard them. The guards would pretend to be a married couple. The man would act as a gardener/carpenter; the woman would serve as Freya's maid. Since Freya had never worked a day in her life, and since Samuel was hopelessly inept in anything he did outside of the lab, both soldiers would take care of kitchen duties as well. They also handled all of the sailing duties. If it were necessary to remain away from the country for more than a year, a different pretend married couple would take over guard/servant duties each June.

      On the trip down the western coasts of Alaska, British Columbia, and Washington, the exiles adjusted to their new circumstances. The name Freya would be too noticeable. The queen took the name Ashleigh instead. The prince's name was shortened to Sam. The most common American surname was Smith. Queen Freya had rejected that name as hopelessly common. They'd be known as Ashleigh and Sam Smythe instead. Princess Freya would become Madison. Each of the servants would be called Johnson. Whichever Johnson was closest when the queen called for a servant would respond. Bowing and curtsying were no longer appropriate behaviours and the long trip gave enough time for old habits to be broken.

      Samuel had learned that the University of Washington in Seattle had a genetics lab that might be useful. They sailed into Seattle harbour, passing Bainbridge Island and its busy Eagle Harbour. Ashleigh saw the houses atop the ridge above the harbour and instructed the Johnson sailing the ship to anchor. Rent me a suitable furnished house up there, she commanded.

      One week later, they were off the yacht and in a high end, although not ostentatious three storey house. The Johnsons would live in the furnished suite above the stylized helicopter hangar. Sam would convert the basement of the house to a lab although it would take him several months to get it up and running. Madison had the entire third floor to herself. Mrs. Johnson filled it with toys and checked in several times a day to see if Madison's diaper needed changing. Ashleigh didn't enjoy the climb to the third floor, so she didn't attempt it a second time. She'd see Madison at meals, exactly as she had done back home. Otherwise, Ashleigh spent her time in the mini-gym or in a bedroom that Mr. Johnson had converted to a study. She had decided that she'd spend her free time writing historical romance novels.

      # # # # # # # #

      It wasn't until well after Madison's third birthday that Sam noticed that his daughter didn't have much to say during the family's meals. Most of the time, she ignored any questions that she was asked. After silently finishing her meal, she'd scramble down from her booster chair and scoot up to her apartment on the third floor.

      Is Madison all right? Sam asked Ashleigh. She hardly talks during meals. Is she like that during the day too?

      I don't know, Ashleigh said. Ask the staff.

      The Johnsons were duly called in. Neither could answer the question. Mrs. Johnson had stopped traipsing up to the third floor because her duty regarding Madison was solely to change her diapers. Madison was now potty trained. Mr. Johnson had no reason to visit the third floor because nothing upstairs was broken.

      Alone with his wife, Sam probed as to what kind of involvement Queen Freya had with her daughter. The simple answer was None.

      Before the reader jumps to some hasty conclusions, I must tell you that when Queen Freya was a child, she herself had rarely seen her parents. She was raised by staff who were hired for that purpose. Even when she entered her teenage years, she'd only see her mom and dad for meals and for formal family occasions. After they died in a copter accident when she was fourteen, Freya continued that same relationship with her uncle. Queen Freya was just raising her daughter as she herself had been raised. The difference was that Queen Freya had had staff to talk to, listen to, and relate to when she was growing up. Madison had nobody. No wonder she didn't say much. She understood only a few words. She had nothing to say because she hadn't had any practice talking.

      Fortunately Sam had been raised in a normal family environment – an absolutely stinking rich environment, but one where family members talked with each other and the mother and father raised their children. He explained what Ashleigh's role as a mother was supposed to be. He himself was too busy doing his queen's bidding to become involved in raising a child. But he'd have more time to spend with his family if the queen allowed him to make one tiny incision in the body. Making babies with her eggs was much easier than making babies without any of her eggs. The queen ignored such a ludicrous idea. The body was all that she had.

      We'll hire staff so that Madison won't be left on her own, Queen Freya directed.

      We're not supposed to interact with strangers. You uncle was most specific about that. Only the Johnsons are allowed in the house. You know that Scandinavia is still in turmoil. Your uncle will not appreciate hearing that you won't take care of your own daughter.

      So Ashleigh took the plunge. She had nothing else to do anyway. The dream of writing romances had proven to be more challenging than she had thought. Other than her signature, Freya had never written a word in her life. She had staff to do that. The Johnson lady wasn't working out very well in that romance-writing venture.

      In time, Ashleigh began to enjoy her time with Madison. They'd go to the local playground and Ashleigh would watch how other mothers treated their children. Then she'd do the same thing that they did. She and Madison walked frequently – part of Ashleigh's resolve to maintain her perfect body. That meant that both of them saw grocery stores, for example, and learned what they were. A library was a tremendous discovery. The librarian would read stories to the children, and afterwards, the children could play together. One time Ashleigh had to clench her teeth when a diseased mother tried to talk to her. She left immediately for home to scrub both her own and her daughter's perfect bodies.

      In June 2084, one set of Johnsons went home; another set of Johnsons arrived to take over guarding the royal family and attending to their needs. The new male servant's real first name was James. The new female servant's real first name was Jak, short for Jakobina.

      In September 2084, Ashleigh enrolled her daughter in pre-school. Like the other moms,

      Enjoying the preview?
      Page 1 of 1