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    Three Bridges
    Three Bridges
    Three Bridges
    Ebook79 pages1 hour

    Three Bridges

    By Shamus LePour

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    About this ebook

    Three Bridges is about matching sexual preferences and behaviors between partners, and also about maintaining dominant relationships by "pruning" ancillary relationships or "burning bridges." The author examines the current range of sexual practices and behaviors, categorizes the female attitude towards sex and sexual activity, and finally reports on personal experiences with sexual type matching and burning bridges. It is meant to be an amusing read, but also has an element of "self help" for the millions of people stuck in relationships that don't seem to work well.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherShamus LePour
    Release dateNov 13, 2016
    ISBN9781370563852
    Three Bridges
    Author

    Shamus LePour

    I am a PhD physchologist who has been a practicioner, teacher, university administrator and rancher. During my college years I was fortunate to develop a relationship with Leon Festinger and his wife Mary. His research and resulting theory of Cognitive Dissonance greatly changed the way that I viewed happiness and the lack thereof in my fellow humans. Throughout my life I have made a practice of studying and identifying the people, places and things in my life that have brought about happiness or difficulties.I live in the Great Mojave Desert.

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      Book preview

      Three Bridges - Shamus LePour

      Three Bridges

      Shamus LePour

      Copyright © 2016 by Shamus LePour

      Smashwords Edition

      This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

      Table of Contents

      Preface

      Chapter 1 – Rationale

      Chapter 2 - Matching Sexual Behavior and Attitudes

      Chapter 3 - Type Matching and Consequences

      Chapter 4 - Benefits of Matching

      Chapter 5 – Burning Bridges

      Chapter 6 – Three (now 4) Bridges

      Chapter 7 – Other Bridges

      Chapter 8 – Time for Action

      Chapter 9 - Reflections

      Chapter 10 - End of the Story

      Preface

      This writing is a sequel to the ebook Perception that is available on Smashwords. Perception is about attempting to quantify some of the ingredients of happy relations between couples of any sex. The point of that book was to investigate our perceptions of what makes us happy and what we think we like and how matching those perceptions of happiness strengthens relationships. If we end up building or maintaining multiple relationships we may need to consider doing some pruning. As a given relationship grows and strengthens the participants usually resent one or both of the partners maintaining other parallel relationships. In this era of wi-fi and instant telecommunications continuing contact with past or present parallel partners can cause considerable turmoil. Men in the Thai culture who behave in this manner are deemed butterflies. The title of this ebook Three Bridges is a chronicle of a situation of parallel relationships, and an analytical attempt to decide which relationships to end, or put another way which bridges to burn.

      The first part of this writing deals directly with sex, our desires, attitudes and perceptions about it. It is written from the perspective of a white male born, educated and raised in the USA. If there is any latitude about my perspective it would be that the author is from San Francisco, and he grew up in the great eras of that city starting in the 1950's. The premise is that understanding and honoring one's sexual attitudes and needs, matching those with a partner as closely as possible will provide a strong basis for a potentially strong relationship, while failure to acknowledge and deal with this will likely cause continual frustration and eventually cause the relationship to collapse.

      Chapter 1 - Rationale

      It is well documented that the major causes of distressed relationships and divorce/separation are finances and sexual relations. So now we take a close look at attitudes, actions and behaviors relating to sex in relationships. Evolving behaviors and sexual perceptions call for more empiracle evidence about what goes on between couples sexually. Lacking that I call upon personal experience and observation. Most certainly I have a long and rich history with sexual actions and perceptions, and I attempt to put this history to work in a way that might be helpful to the sexually frustrated or confused individual, which includes all of us who live outside denial. And coping with sexual desire in relationships is certainly nothing new. Biblical Commandments 7 and 10 deal with it directly by ordering us to not commit adultery and not to covet our neighbors wife. Perhaps older is the 4th Precept insisted on for pure living by Siddhartha Gautama, Buddhism's founder which prohibits sexual promiscuity.

      I have lived for many years in Thailand, where over 80% of the citizens are practicing and mostly serious Theravada Buddhists. But here the 4th Precept is much more theory than practice. A large majority of men are engaged in extra marital sex in one way or another, and the rule put forth by wives seems to be just keep it away from the family. A woman in university or with a regular job will often accept a sponsor in which case she will be called sy-ly. A full-time girlfriend of a married man (regardless of her marital status) will be called gek. An interesting recent study on university student females found that nearly 50% of all students at the subject university (located in Esan, a poorer region) were si-ly girls. This is an arrangement wherein a female student agrees with a sponsor on a monthly stipend, and then makes herself available for sex with the sponsor on a weekly or monthly basis. There are web sites dedicated to university girl si-ly hookups that are fascinating to read but none are in English, and 99% of the si-ly university girls would not accept a non-Asian sponsor. If you are Farang (white European or westerner) and want to connect with a university girl as si-ly you would be well advised to ask a male Thai friend to assist with communications and any negotiations.

      Sexual Boundaries

      Like most aspects of language and culture sexual norms shift over time. What was once taboo may become acceptable over time. Boundaries that were unthinkable 20 years ago become almost normal. Words and actions that were banned on television by the FCC years ago are now common place on broadcast television, and cable channels often feature raw sexual scenes.

      50 years ago the acceptable sex norms were blowjobs and penis in pussy sex augmented by occasional hush hush anal sex. The bondage crowd aside these were the accepted norms. Examination of the porn films and print from that era reinforce this. Slowly elements were added to the mainstream. The golden shower turns into more acceptable watersports and in more recent years coprophaglia (shit eating) has gained some acceptance and is featured in Asian and Western porn videos and now has its own tag line of hard sports. Lacking the World-Wide Web and wi-fi sexually explicit materials were available only in hard copy photos, or moving picture reels used at smokers (gathering of men for an evening outing, usually affiliated with a social club). I well recall my barber showing me titty and occasional fuck pictures when I was a lad.

      So the normal boundaries in 2016 seem to range from traditional fucking, through shit eating all all that falls in between. While most normal sexual functionaries will never experience the extremes of golden showers or coprophaglia the fact is that the five steps of modern sexual practice appear to range from normal fucking to oral sex, to anal sex (penetration or oral) to golden showers (piss and piss drinking) to shit (scat) eating. Research would most likely reveal that a very small percentage of individuals who are sexually active participate in levels

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