How to Grieve: Even when you don't want to
()
About this ebook
How to Grieve is a how-to guide with practical tips on every page and resource lists at the back of the booklet. Specifically designed with the death of a partner or spouse in mind, How to Grieve: Even When You Don't Want To is applicable to any loss: a child, friend, pet, or divorce.
This booklet offers succinct, practical, and accessible information for those looking for guidance in the face of grief and loss of a loved one. In her non-threatening and down-to-earth style, Ms. Willman validates and acknowledges the many manifestations of grief while empowering the reader to explore their own experiences of grieving.
~ Cara Young, LCSW, Hospice Social Worker
Valerie Ihsan
Valerie Ihsan writes memoir and women's mainstream fiction. She’s a certified Three Story Method editor, specializing in Story Diagnostics and helping memoirists with structure and theme. She co-chaired the Eugene Chapter of Willamette Writers for ten years, has taught classes and workshops on writing, self-publishing, and grief. She loves dogs and lives in the Pacific Northwest.
Read more from Valerie Ihsan
The Scent of Apple Tea Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSmell the Blue Sky ENHANCED edition Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsYou Can't Dance a Lie: A Memoir of Stepping Into My Truth Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSmell the Blue Sky: Young, Pregnant, and Widowed Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related to How to Grieve
Related ebooks
Memories Too Few: A Letter to Parents about Pregnancy Loss Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Break-Up Survival Guide: How Women Can Recover After a Break-Up Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsShattered Dreams: The True Story of A Young Woman Too Young To Die Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThree Years Later: How I Survived My Divorce Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCome on Man: You Can't Be Serious Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDivorce Happens: Bounce Back! Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGrieving with Hope: Finding Comfort as You Journey through Loss Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Widowed, Single, Now What? Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSoon She Will Be Dead: A Comprehensive Guide to Losing Your Parent Without Losing Your Mind Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Not at Your Child's Expense: A Guide to Constructive Parenting Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Cup of Black Coffee: When there's nothing left... savour something Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSatan's Advice for the New Parent: Satan's Guides to Life, #2 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A Special Child in the Family: Living with Your Sick or Disabled Child Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Ian Stewart's Addiction Recovery Handbook: 12-Step Recovery Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsUnpacking My Shit: This is not a self help book Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEnough is Enough: How To Leave Your Abusive Husband Without Him Knowing and Regain Your Life Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSingly Ever After: …Because Single Parenting Is Not Happily Ever After! Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLessons Learned: Finding Grace Amid the Chaos of Divorce Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsI Carry Your Heart in Mine: Creating a Meaningful Life after the Death of a Spouse Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsShould You Leave? Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5God for all People: Some Fact; Some Fiction Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGently They Rage Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsA Broken Therapist¡¦S Guide to Completeness Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFrom Wed to Widow: A Guide to Self-Care, Self-Love, and Self-Discovery Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPreparing to Fly: Financial Freedom from Domestic Abuse Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRx for Waiting: Side Effects May Vary Lot No. 143 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsFor All You Know:: Possible Reasons You May Still Be Unhappy On The Path To Enlightenment Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCare Giving: Real Life Answers Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Relationships For You
A Child Called It: One Child's Courage to Survive Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Big Book of 30-Day Challenges: 60 Habit-Forming Programs to Live an Infinitely Better Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5She Comes First: The Thinking Man's Guide to Pleasuring a Woman Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Nonmonogamy Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I'm Glad My Mom Died Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: The Narcissism Series, #1 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The Good Girl's Guide to Great Sex: Creating a Marriage That's Both Holy and Hot Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Understand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Becoming Free Indeed: My Story of Disentangling Faith from Fear Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: A Therapist, HER Therapist, and Our Lives Revealed Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Lasts Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Your Brain's Not Broken: Strategies for Navigating Your Emotions and Life with ADHD Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Princess Bride: S. Morgenstern's Classic Tale of True Love and High Adventure Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/58 Rules of Love: How to Find It, Keep It, and Let It Go Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Boundaries Workbook: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Not Die Alone: The Surprising Science That Will Help You Find Love Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5And Every Morning the Way Home Gets Longer and Longer: A Novella Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5All About Love: New Visions Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5What Makes Love Last?: How to Build Trust and Avoid Betrayal Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Codependence and the Power of Detachment: How to Set Boundaries and Make Your Life Your Own Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5It's Not Supposed to Be This Way: Finding Unexpected Strength When Disappointments Leave You Shattered Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Talk so Little Kids Will Listen: A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7 Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Reviews for How to Grieve
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
How to Grieve - Valerie Ihsan
You are not alone.
How to Grieve
EVEN WHEN YOU DON’T WANT TO
VALERIE IHSAN
How To Grieve: Even When You Don’t Want To
Valerie Ihsan
How To Grieve: Even When You Don’t Want To © 2014 Valerie Ihsan
All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
Printed in the United States of America
Cover Design: paperandsage.com
Contents
Foreword
1. Afterwards
2. At Home and Work
3. Reaching Out
4. Carrying On
5. And Beyond
6. Even Later
About the Author
7. Smell the Blue Sky: Young, Pregnant, and Widowed
8. Free Offer
Foreword
When I was 26, I told my husband, Rob, we were finally pregnant with our second child. We’d been trying for eight months. Later that same day, Rob died. He’d fallen asleep driving and hit a highway signpost.
I was pregnant and was now a widow. I had a 22-month-old daughter.
I didn’t know how to be a widow. I didn’t know any widows. I had no road map, no blueprints. There was no how-to guide—and prior to 9/11 there weren’t many books on grieving a spouse at such a young age.
Let this booklet be that guide for you.
—Certified Bereavement Facilitator since 2004; Widow since 2000.
Afterwards
After you’ve heard the news, everything is a normal reaction. You could cry, scream, stare at the wall, rock your- self, eat, or throw up. It’s all normal. There’s no one right way to grieve.
LET SOMEONE KNOW. Let your family/friends/neighbors help you. You can’t do this alone. Most likely someone else will pick up the reins at this point and finish notifying whoever needs knowing. Food will materialize. Your house chores will start being done by others, and you can continue to stare at the wall. That’s what I did. I cried, too, but mostly I just sat. And waited. For whatever was going to happen next.
MAKE ONLY IMMEDIATE DECISIONS. There’ll be plenty of other little things you’ll be called upon to deal with. Don’t worry about the long-term stuff right now. The mainstream advice is not to make any major decisions right after a tragedy. Some- times it can’t be helped—like approving an organ transplant, or needing to move out of the rental house that you can no longer afford on one salary—but put off whatever you can. I was fortunate enough to not have to decide anything