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    How to Fail Miserably at Dirty Words
    How to Fail Miserably at Dirty Words
    How to Fail Miserably at Dirty Words
    Ebook40 pages25 minutes

    How to Fail Miserably at Dirty Words

    By Giselle Renarde

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    About this ebook

    Giselle’s done everything wrong so you don’t have to!

    Giselle Renarde is an award-winning author who’s been failing at everything since 2006. Her erotica and queer fiction have appeared in nearly 200 short story anthologies and published by two of the Big Five publishing house, but don’t let that fool you. Giselle is a writer who knows how to fail—consistently and thoroughly!

    In this collection of short musings from the erotic writers’ blog Oh Get a Grip, Giselle treats readers to a veritable smorgasbord of anecdotes about the ins and outs of writing erotic fiction. Her erotica and queer fiction have appeared in nearly 200 short story anthologies,

    If you’re an author of steamy, spicy smut, don't let the publishing industry get you down. Let’s all join hands and fail together!

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherGiselle Renarde
    Release dateSep 28, 2017
    ISBN9781370388677
    How to Fail Miserably at Dirty Words
    Author

    Giselle Renarde

    Giselle Renarde is a queer Canadian, avid volunteer, and contributor to more than 100 short story anthologies, including Best Women's Erotica, Best Lesbian Erotica, Best Bondage Erotica, and Best Lesbian Romance. Ms Renarde has written dozens of juicy books, including Anonymous, Ondine, and Nanny State. Her book The Red Satin Collection won Best Transgender Romance in the 2012 Rainbow Awards. Giselle lives across from a park with two bilingual cats who sleep on her head.

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      Book preview

      How to Fail Miserably at Dirty Words - Giselle Renarde

      How to Fail Miserably at Dirty Words

      © 2017 by Giselle Renarde

      All rights reserved.

      No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher.

      The essays in this collection were originally published on the authors’ blog Oh Get a Grip!

      Cover design © 2017 Giselle Renarde

      First Edition 2017

      How to Fail Miserably at

      Dirty Words

      Everything I’ve Done Wrong

      By Giselle Renarde

      Table of Contents

      Hit Me With Your Best Shot

      You Can't Write That

      Give Me the Music

      The Monster at the End of This Book

      Enough Already

      Did your father ever... touch you?

      Contextual Kink

      Everything You Wrote Before Now Was Boring As Fuck

      Over the Taboo Rainbow

      My Substitute for Love

      Fiction Intended to Titillate

      I Cut My Teeth on Adultery (Erotica)

      Did that really happen?

      Hit Me With Your Best Shot

      If readers were to assess me based solely on the posts I generate for the Oh Get A Grip erotica authors’ blog, I'm not sure they'd realize what dirty, filthy smut I write.  I don't tend to talk about erotica very much, do I?

      But today I will.  Today I'll delve into the nitty-gritty of word choice in erotic fiction.  In fact, today I’ll be focused on in cum.  Or come?  Jizz. Ejaculate.

      Maybe I should clarify: cum is not a personal interest of mine.  I'm just talking about words, here.  When I saw the topic Dirty Words I've Taught the Computer, I didn't think I'd taught my computer anything.  I'd planned on talking about how writing erotica professionally made me a better person, but I've written that post a billion times already.  So when I was tip-tap-typing away this week and the autocorrect turned jizz into jazz I was like... EUREKA!

      JIZZ.

      Am I the only person who uses this word?  I remember reading a post on Alison Tyler's blog that said something along the lines of Don't send me submissions containing the word jizz.  What? Why not?  I like it.  Reminds me of Jiz Lee, who is soooo cool and smart and sexy and stuff.  Gush, gush, gush.

      Are there any connotations I'm missing?  I like the way it sounds.  Jizz, like fizz.  Is that gross?  It's got a streamy, streaking feeling to

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