Jason's Final Coming

JASON’S FINAL

COMING

Terry Smith

Writers Club Press

New York Lincoln Shanghai

Jason’s Final Coming

All Rights Reserved © 2002 by Terry T.F. Smith

No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping, or by any information storage retrieval system, without the permission in writing from the publisher.

Writers Club Press

an imprint of iUniverse, Inc.

For information address:

iUniverse

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Lincoln, NE 68512

www.iuniverse.com

ISBN: 978-1-469-77203-5 (ebook)

ISBN: 0-595-20860-6

Printed in the United States of America

Contents

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

1

THE BEGINNING OF A DEAD CHILD’S

EXPERIENCE

2

A DYING OLD MAN IS

AWAKENED AS A MENTOR

3

GIVING NICHOLAS BIRTH

INTO DEATH

4

FINDING

A DEMON DOG AND FIRE FROM HELL

5

CREATING HIS CRY

6

WHEN IT SNOWS IN APRIL

7

WITH JOY IN MR. JOHNSON’S HEART

8

WHILE MRS. GREEN AND THE BOY

WAIT FOR THE CORONER

9

JASON ROLLS TO NEW BEGINNING

10

UNTIL THE STORM PASSES AND I DIE

SO THAT I MIGHT LIVE AGAIN

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Tribute

For God, I Stand with Love, Ovation and Devotion

I dedicate this work with highest accolades to my Mother and Father,

Newton and Juanita Smith

Acknowledgments

I send love to my always-remembered grandmother, Ethel Rose, who passed on many years ago. Love to my sister Jackie Sunshine Smith, professional boxing promoter extraordinaire at SunshineBoxing.com. Jack and Helene’ Murphy, I thank you for helping raise me after my father died when I was a little boy. Mr. and Mrs. Milton and Edith Berman, thank you for always being as dear as family. Elizabeth, thanks for your love and treasured attention : )

Love to my family: Many generations of Roses; Franklins, Ethel, Collins, Myron, Diane, Patricia, Gregory, Rachel, Reginald, Juanita, Lamar, and Karen; the Bradwells; Maxwells; Marshalls; Aunt Jessie and hundreds of cousins around the world.

My Agent, Maddie Perrone, and Samuel, at Literary Artists, Author Jennifer Ferranno, and Jon McWilliams at iUniverse, thanks for your guidance in the world of publishing. Thank you Betty Williams and Peggy Speegle for ardent and tireless manuscript reading and endless supply of encouragement.

Hello, love and thanks: Karen Bell and all my friends from the days of Hampton University; Candice and Justin Costa, thanks for my first computer in my first days of Los Angeles many years ago; Angela Hampton and her family; Riviera Parkway-Rhonda, George and Debbie, Garry and Dennis for keeping home a happy place; Leigh Ann; Judi, Curt, Faith, Gabriel, and the entire Lassiter-Williams family; Coley, Cedric, Caroline; Marya Bogier and family; Lahn, Linda, never forgotten-Lee, Royce, Lori, and their children, Uncle Ricky; Marinda, Stanley Cisco Clarke; Claude Howard; Hugh Brown; Frieda Hooper and her boys; John Woodgie; Kathleen; Sandra and Jason; Ronnie Belton and family; Michael, Lydia and their boys; Linda and the Brysons; Clarice, James Jones, Cheryl; Lorine Calhoun, Eric, Monica and her new baby; Nicole; Stephanie; Winova; Kelly; Susan; Lisa; Pamela Wallace, Dante, Larry B. Scott and family; Janet; Lesley and Aaron; Fred and Brea Johnson; Mark; Lil Joe; Conrad; Ted Lyons; Bettie; Keisha; Tamera; Best Choice Printing; Dr. Pennick; Kim; Michael and Ashten.

Thank you Coach Donovan; Ms. Erma Hill; Mr. Eaves; Mrs. Fant; Mr. Render, Professor and Author Felicia Mason; Ms. Whitmore; Dr. Holloway; Dr. Haydock; Walt Walker and all former teachers and professors who exercised my brain. To current educators of this planet I applaud for nourishing the minds of our youth for our world’s brilliant future.

To my son, Trae, and all children and adults of this age’s issues, I wish wise choices, positive development and absolute love…

Terry Smith at www.TerrySmithBooks.com

1

The Beginning Of A Dead Child’s

Experience

They told me that they were Angels of God sent to guide me through death and teach me a better way.

After you die, believe me, you appreciate life a lot more. I’m Jason; I’ve been dead longer than I have time to explain. A lot of important decisions are being made about me right now. What happens in the next few moments of your time means a lot to us. Bear with me while I tell our story. It’s imperative that you listen, this time.

Ignorant idiots killed me. Nanna was also killed because of my ignoramus adolescent choices. Now, I’m in the after-world on trial waiting to see if I’m going to heaven or hell.

My plea for survival is that I’ve learned from my experience and have grown. If filled with life again, it will end eons of time that I’ve been dead. Hopefully, at the end of this trial, this will be the story of something good, something positive. If I’m not granted the gift of life back into the physical world, you’ll just get to see what took me to hell.

At any moment, they’re going to call me back into the proceeding. You may go inside with me. You must, however, be very quiet and not interfere with the procedure. You’ll understand more as you travel with me throughout this experience.

For now, though, it’s time to go back into the judge’s chambers. Come on; I promise, I’ll talk with you again, later.

Oh, there’s one more thing—if you don’t recognize the language you will hear, it’s okay. Not many people in the living world remember the tongue. But, listen to my answers, you’ll understand. Come on, it’s time...

Inu?

Since I have lived and died, I have learned my lessons well and have grown accordingly. I am prepared to begin a purposeful life in physical existence. If you grant me this blessing, I will use my wisdom wisely.

Oehiem?

A spirit guided me to a small room and told me to think about my life. I was young and did not understand at that time. I didn’t want to think about my whole life, just what killed me. I wasn’t talking, but could hear my thoughts tremendously loud outside my head. At that point, I still used my living vernacular. I cursed; that is where I was at that time. I have matured since then.

In the Beginning of my Little Room, I thought and heard from myself: ***

I don’t believe this bullshit! Nicholas was my boy! I can’t believe he ran! It was so stupid. All we were doin’ was stealin’ a frompin’ car. If Nicholas hadn’t punked out on me, I would still be alive and not in all this bullcrap right now! This bodiless motherfucker with no body is asking me to think about my life and what I’ve been through. I been through a lot! I was alive a long time; hell, in fourteen years, a lot of shit happened.

***

I thought of ugly things that happened in my life for what seemed like forever. After intolerance of this timeless torture to my soul, I began to think of the positive things in my life. I remembered everything from Nanna pushing me in the grocery store buggy until the day I was shot. My happiest memory was Miss Hill—my fifth grade teacher—I’ll never forget her. She was the finest woman I had ever seen! She always told me that I should listen to the world. It took me a long time to understand what she meant. But I finally figured it out. Maybe I learned a little bit too late, but I still learned.

The last thing I remember in life was that bitch in the car screamin’, ‘that’s him! That’s him!’

Then I heard the sound of the guns. Now, this thing without a body is jumping in and out this room. Tell him what I learned, hell. I learned that life was messed up; even your own boys will stick you up the ass when it comes right down to it. I’m already dead! What the hell does this shapeless thing want to know?!

At that moment, the mysterious spirit came through the walls again. There was no door for him to use; his surprise visits were quite unsettling. He asked, Have you come up with a response to my question?

In my angered tone, I answered, First of all, who are you? NO! What the fuck are you? Where am I, and what the hell is goin’ on around here?

He responded, You are in transition. In order to proceed, you must grow from what you have learned from your life experience.

I didn’t understand what he meant. Freshly dead, I did not have patience to listen. I shouted, Grow from what I’ve learned in life! What are you talking about? Yo! I don’t need this crap! What’s your damned problem anyway?

He told me that it was not my turn to ask questions.

I interrupted him with my screams, Forget you! Kiss my ass. I don’t have any damned questions. I’ve been through this long enough; I’m tired of waitin’. Let me out of this room!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

He looked at me as if what I said meant nothing. He told me, As of this moment, you have until I return to consider my question. If you have not contemplated what I have asked, you will delay your process until I return, again.

I shouted, Get away from me. I said, I don’t need this crap! I’ve paid my dues. I’m dead. Let me out of this room!!!!!

He left the same way he entered, through the wavy walls of my world; I heard his voice. He said, So be it. You have been instructed. It is now up to you how long your process takes.

I realized that I was dead and no longer in control of my life the way I was when I was alive. Again, I could hear my thoughts as if they were amplified through monstrous speakers outside my head.

***

This is just like life. You go through all kinds of coldcrap and then get nothin’ in the end anyway. I know I’m going to hell. Why can’t we just get to the freakin’ point? Even in death, you can’t trust shit. Hell, that’s one thing I learned, you can’t trust crap; life was messed up.

***

Instantly, the shapeless spirit appeared again. He said, In fourteen years of living, your greatest lesson in life was that life was not good?

I had reached my limit with his surprise visits. I told him with my most forceful ferocity, First of all, you crazy looking lunatic, stop jumping up in here from nowhere! This jacked up little room is messed up enough. Your dumb looking ass with no body is too much for me. I’m tired of being here; I wanna get out! Yo, I know where I’m going; just let me get on with it!!

First of all young man, you don’t ‘Know’ anything.

When are you going to let me out of this cage? I asked.

The spirit smiled and responded, Simply explain why your biggest lesson in life was that it was not good.

Look, you freak, where I come from, you could get killed for just being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Ain’t nobody gonna give you jack, if you want something, you gotta’ take it. That’s just the way it is. I didn’t make the rules, I just died trying to live by ‘em, that’s all.

Have you ever trusted in good?

What the fuck do you mean ‘trust’ in good? How the hell do you think I got here? I thought my boy, Nic, would cover my back—I thought I could trust in that. That didn’t work out. I’m here because it was just my freakin’ time to die.

You are here because it is time for you to expand your mind.

Leave me alone! Everybody has got to die sometime. It was just my freakin’ time to go. Just let me out of this crazy room! Hell has gotta’ be better than being here.

We are not talking about everyone. We are talking about you. And the question is, have you ever lived in good?

What does any of this have to do with my living a jacked up life and dying? Hell, I screwed up. You don’t hear me crying.

To have such a smart mouth, you certainly don’t impress me as being such a smart young man.

What the hell do you mean? You don’t know me.

What makes you think you are going to ‘Hell?’ How do you know you are not there already? How do you know you are not in Heaven?

Cause hell is where bad little thugs like me go when we die—everybody knows that!

"This is my second time telling you—you do not truly know anything. When you understand this, your being will expand."

Well, I know I’m getting tired of this stupid place! I know I want to see something happen. And what the hell does the devil look like anyway? I wanna see something happen right now!

Hopefully, after more experience, you will see life from a different perspective.

I’m tired of being alone in this damned room!!!

What hurts you is your insistent refusal to realize that you decide how long your process takes. When you free hate from your heart and open your soul, you will leave this self-induced state of discontent—and your little room. You will evolve to higher comprehension.

The spirit stopped talking and looked at me for what seemed like an eternity, ignoring my cries.

Finally, he spoke, When I leave, practice a mental exercise. Pretend you are a bird spying on all of the days of your life. When I return, if you tell me what you have learned, you will leave this room.

He left me amazed and alone in my own death. As much as I did not understand what was happening, I knew that if I wanted to escape my room of hellish displeasure, I would have to do what was asked of me.

*******

This is what I thought:

"Think of myself as a damned bird. This place is like a bad acid trip. When I think of birds, I think of the last bird I shot. Laura, the crazy girl across the street, died that night. She tried to put a spell on my boy, Nicholas—witchcraft and all that crazy shit. Nicholas was as scared as a girl—that bozo shot her head right off.

Everybody knew the girl was retarded. Nicholas knew it too. He was a paranoid bean head. He had sex with Karen, and then told her to kiss his ass and get lost. Why did Karen have to tell crazy Laura to put a spell on Nicholas to make him bark like a dog? Because of that, Nicholas shot that crazy girl. Blew her whole brain out! I told him he was jacked up. He asked me why I was laughing if I thought he was wrong. I couldn’t say jack. He was right; I was laughing. But I knew that he was messed up. He didn’t even get caught; he snuck into Laura’s house that night, put a pillow around the barrel of his gun and pulled the trigger. After blowing her retarded brains all over her little pink and flower laced room, he jumped out the window and hauled ass.

The more I think about it, the madder I get. Why did he do that? He didn’t have to kill the crazy girl. Hell, how did he even know Karen was-n’t just lying about the whole thing and didn’t tell that girl anything? Laura could have died for just being born stupid.

I should have messed with Nicholas’ mind and told him that anybody who kills a witch goes crazy forever as soon as her dead body gets cold. That would have scared the piss out of him for the rest of his days. And now this bodiless thing is asking me why I thought life was jacked up. Crazy Laura thought life was good and she could trust going to sleep that night and waking up the next morning. Look at what happened to her. And she might not have been doing jack! I wonder if she’s around here somewhere. Na, she was retarded. She probably didn’t have to go through all this weird crap like I am.

I remember Nanna. I remember her like I was alive yesterday. I put her through a lot of pain. She told me to stop; I’m surprised I lived this long. I know she’s disappointed as hell in me. If Daddy had still been alive, he would have kicked my butt straight. Daddy didn’t play, man. Nanna used to always say if I didn’t clean up my act, running around with lil’ juvenile delinquents would get me killed. She said if anybody ever killed me, she wouldn’t mind spending the rest of her life in jail for cleaning them off the face of the lord’s good earth.

Ah man, Nanna did have a short ass fuse when it came to my little bad ass. And damn, she never did get rid of Daddy’s old gun. What if she went crazy and walked outside with that gun and got hurt. Ahhh man…

Or, damn, she could be dead! Those crazy motherfuckers who shot me were dangerous. I’m gonna blow this room up if I don’t find out about Nanna!!!"

I banged savagely on what seemed like walls. I did not feel anything with my hands and I could no longer hear sound. It were as if the walls were not real; either that, or I were not real. I do not know if anybody heard me; but I screamed as loudly as I could, Let me out of here!!!!!!!!!!

Instantly, the bodiless person appeared again, You sound anxious.

LOOK! Stop Scaring Me Like That!!! Don’t just pop up on me! Warn me before you come in here!!

My child, remember, when I appear before you, there is no need for fear. Instead, remember, we are within each other at all times.

Don’t freakin’ scare me like that! Alright!

What you just said about your Nanna, would you really like to see her?

Hell yeah, I want to see her. And if I don’t get to see her, I’m gonna turn this place upside down!

The spirit laughed at me. I interrupted, Stop laughing! Damn it; I want to see Nanna!!!

He finally stopped the maddening laughter and spoke with compassion, Tell me what you have learned most in life.

And then I can see her? I asked.

Oh you may do more than see her, you may speak with her.

The thing I learned most was that life was jacked up. You couldn’t trust anything, or anybody.

What you are about to see may frighten you. Resist the fear. Remember that I am always with you. The time you have there will last until you return here. Use wisely the time you have there.

What are you talking about??????? AAAAAAHHHH!!!

Before I could finish screaming, I was no longer in my little room. I could see Nanna.

I screamed,Nanna!! That’s you! Nanna,look at you.What happened to you? Why are you in this hospital? Wake up! Nanna, wake up!! Somebody help me! Nanna!!! Wake up!

Then the bodiless person appeared.

Your shaking and screaming won’t help. She can’t feel you, nor can she see or hear you. No one can. You are here in spirit. Your Nanna has been shot. She may die. If she lives, she will be imprisoned for murder. She will also be paralyzed. In prison, there will be a contract for the murder of her life.

Paralyzed? What do you mean, contract on her life? I want to talk to her. You said I could talk with her.

You may. She is in deep sleep now. When you speak with her, you will do so through her dreams.

As suddenly as the spirit came, he left. I screamed for him without reply, Hey, come back! I need help. Come back you bodiless twerp! How do I get inside her dream? Come back!!! Help!

He was gone. She had gone out looking for the people who shot me. She tried to kill them. I did not know if she could hear me.

I said, Nanna, you spent your whole life trying to be good, taking care of other people, looking after my stupid butt. You shouldn’t go to Hell because you killed some bad assed ding-dongs just because they killed me. But Nanna, if you die, you’re gonna end up like me—going to Hell.

An unearthly voice appeared like cannons in my mind and startled me. The voice said, Eeem told you that she can’t hear you! Stop crying, you little baby!!

I was frightened, STOP SCARING ME LIKE THAT !!! I screamed.

Then an image slowly appeared.I asked,Who are you? Laura? Is that you? Retarded Laura from across the street? The dead voodoo girl?

In a gentle voice, she said, Yes, Jason, it’s me, Laura. I’ve grown up a lot since then.

Na, you look about the same, but your head is back together again. The last time I saw you it was splattered all over the walls.

I’ve grown up a lot since then in spirit, she replied.

Can you tell me what’s wrong with Nanna?

Laura’s response really threw me for a loop. She said, When I think of you, a bird lands on the tree in front of me. He sits there looking around as if waiting for someone. If he learned how to listen, he might live longer.

I became angry at her nonsense, Girl, what the hell are you talking about? Shut that stupid ass stuff up girl. You are still retarded! Damn, I need some real help. That lying little bodiless motherfucker said he would always be around. Nanna!! Wake up!

Laura spoke to me as if she had never been mentally retarded a day in her life, I’m only crazy to you because you don’t yet understand yourself. But, I know you liked shooting little birds in your back yard.

Little girl, what are you talking about?

You were even shooting at birds the day Nicholas killed me.

How do you know?

I’ve been dead longer than you. I’ve learned a lot in my time here.

Girl, you starting to sound like that bodiless ding dong I met when I got killed.

She said, You’re talking about your higher spirit of Eeem and the bird exercise.

I asked, What the hell is an Eeem?

She laughed and asked, How many higher spirits have given you mental bird exercises recently?

I said, Oh that’s who you mean. Eeem? He never told me his name. I didn’t think he had one. Eeem. That’s strange as hell. What kind of name is Eeem?

You have a lot to learn; but, for now, we should fly.

I didn’t understand what she meant. I asked, Fly?

She smiled and said, You better not shoot us down, or we’ll have to find another animal to share.

I thought she was just crazy and I asked rhetorically, What the hell are you talking about?

Come on. Follow me, she said.

We started flying. I screamed with excitement, Look at us!!! This is bad! Ohh man, how are we doing this? Hey, that’s the old neighborhood. Everybody looks so little from up here. Laura, you look like a bird.

You’re riding in the body of a bird. We’re going to land on that tree. Stay close to me.

Na! I want to fly. This is bad as all outside. Look at those little people on the ground. This feels good! Hey, but, wait a minute, we got to get back to the hospital. I got to see about Nanna.

If you’ll land here next to me, I’ll explain what’s going on.

Landing clumsily on the branch, I asked, Am I in purgatory or hell? Where are we?

"Don’t think in terms of place