Three Da' Hard Way: It's Only Just Begun

Three da’ Hard Way

It’s Only Just Begun

Robin L. Cooper

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© 2011 Robin L. Cooper. All rights reserved.

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First published by AuthorHouse 4/18/2011

ISBN: 978-1-4567-5524-9 (e)

ISBN: 978-1-4567-5525-6 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4567-5526-3 (sc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2011906129

Printed in the United States of America

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Dedication

I dedicate this book to my Momma, Louella Payne Gardner, and BigMa, the late Lula Mae Payne. I will never be able to show you how much I appreciate your love, support, and wisdom. Even when I thought I didn’t deserve it, you always had your arms reaching out to me. I LOVE YOU!

Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1. It…Begins

Chapter 2. Two Hearts–True Hearts?

Chapter 3. Beyond Limits

Chapter 4. Unexpected Expectancy

Chapter 5. Could this be a Bad Dream?

Chapter 6. Uncovered Secret

Chapter 7. Does It Have to Always Hurt?

Chapter 8. Does It Have to Always Hurt…So Bad?

Chapter 9. A Part of Me…is Still Me

Chapter 10. Truly–a Nightmare?

Chapter 11. A New Day…Continued Pain

Chapter 12. Same War…Different Battlefield

Chapter 13. What’s Happening Now?

Chapter 14. Endless Love?

Introduction

It is mid-May, 1981. In a few minutes school will be out for the summer. The bell rings, " ring, ring ." Earlier in the day, we had gotten back a dollar and fifty cents from our locker fee, which was the main event of the year for some of us. Two of my best friends, Anita Page and Felicia Wallace, and I are on our way to Tastee Freez, a local fast food restaurant, to spend our money. A burger and water is the order for the day.

After picking up the burger and water, Anita, Felicia and I began to walk to Anita’s house. As we walked toward her house, a young man I had never met before joined us. Anita said, What’s up, Edward? He responded, Nothing much. This is our friend Robin, said Felicia. He smiled and said, What’s up, Robin? Heeey," I said timidly. I was feeling extremely embarrassed because of my shyness around boys.

Little did I know, this Edward would turn out to be the man that I would remember for the rest of my life … and for the rest of his.

Chapter 1

It…Begins

Acouple of days later, Anita informed me, Girl, Edward likes you. Who me? Yes, you. He wants your phone number. Girl, my momma doesn’t let boys call me. In spite of knowing this very well, we came up with a plan. Edward would call me from Anita’s house.

Our plan in action: "Ring, ring, ring, the phone rings. Hello, said my mother. Ms. Lou, may I speak to Robin? It was Anita. Hold on, my mother told her and turned around and yelled, Rooob-in! After pressing the mute button, I yelled back, Ma’am? Telephone. Okay! Little did my mother know I had picked the phone up at the same time she had picked it up. "Click! Anita and I heard the sound of the receiver as she hung up.

Once we were certain that my mother had hung up, Anita gave Edward the telephone. How you doing’, Robin? he asked. Fine, I replied. So, girl, what’s up with me and you? Nothing, I said with as I shyly giggled. So when can I come to see you? I don’t know, my momma doesn’t let me have boys over. Can you meet me somewhere? I’m not sure; maybe somewhere that’s nearby. Immediately Anita interrupted, My cousin is having a party tomorrow night. Where? Edward and I said simultaneously; we both wanted to know. In Turner Circle, across the street from you, Robin. Anita informed us. At that moment, we began to plot how to get me out of the house.

Chapter 2

Two Hearts–True Hearts?

The soft, smooth melody of Lionel Richie and Diana Ross plays throughout the house. " Two hearts, two hearts that beat as one. Our lives have just begun. Forever, Oooh, Oooh, I’ll hold you close in my arm; I can’t resist your charms … ‘Cause no one can deny, this love I have inside, and I give it all to you. My love, My love, My love. My endless love …" Yes, you guessed it. I am at the party slow dancing with Edward and feeling like I am on Cloud 9!

Receiving this type of attention from a boy is new to me and I am enjoying every moment. In fact, I don’t want this night to end. Although Edward is not the cutest boy I know, he is showering me with compliments. He is treating me like I am special, like a much adored queen. That is all good; however, I have to make it home before my curfew. I plummeted from an ultimate high to an all-time low in a matter of minutes as I thought, "If I am one minute past 11 o’clock, I will be severely punished by my mother and will not get the opportunity to see Edward again any time soon.

Edward, I have to go home. Why? he asked. My mom will get me if I come in the house late. Come on, girl, you can stay a little while longer. No, I can’t; you don’t know my mother. You a big baby, he says to me. No, I am not, I responded as I tried to reason with him. Well prove it then, he then said. How? I asked. He then challenged me to stay –to prove that I was not a little girl. Wanting to please my first love, my Endless Love" (I thought), I stayed.

Man, I hope my mom is asleep. I silently prayed while taking my key out of my shoe. Trying to make as little noise as possible, I put the key into the deadbolt, turned the knob and eased into the house. Without turning on any lights, I tip-toed down the hallway and went into my room. Closing the door behind me, while thinking I was home free, I gave a sigh of relief.

Suddenly, I heard a sound; Click, my desk lamp was on, with the light now shining brightly, confirming my worst fear. To my surprise, or should I say not to my surprise, there sat my mother in a chair by my window. At that moment, I knew that my world was about to instantly end. "Girl, what you doing coming into my house this late at night? she screamed. So much for my dreaming," I thought as I stared into her angry face.

Momma, please let me explain, I begged. Child, don’t lie to me, she yelled. Momma, I’m not going to tell you a story. You got two minutes, and you had better make it good or else you will be sorry. Momma, I didn’t know that it was this late, I explained. Momma, you know I know better than to stay out this late, please don’t whip me, I said all in one breath with tears already pouring down my face. I didn’t know which one would be worst, the fact that I knew I would not get the chance to see Edward for I don’t know how long or my mother’s whipping. Where have you been? she asked. I was just right across the street; I was just right across the street at Anita’s cousin’s party. I tried to reason with her. You didn’t ask me if you could go to a party, Robin, you know better. I know them folks drink. Did you drink anything? she asked as she sniffed my breath. No ma’am, Momma. I don’t drink. I know some boys were there! Yes ma’am, but I don’t like no boys Momma," I lied. How could I tell my mother that the reason I was late was because of a boy? I could not. I absolutely would not. I would definitely get it then.

You better not try to go out of this house any time soon. Don’t even ask me, ’cause the answer is already, No, and as a matter of fact, do not let me catch you on my phone, she clearly stated. Yes ma’am, I whispered. I felt like my heart was about to break into pieces. No Edward. Surely it was not over before it could begin, I thought to myself. I don’t think I can take this. I wanted to continue pleading but I knew that I had better let well enough alone. My mother was definitely the shot caller and I had barely missed getting what I knew I deserved. Get in the bed and we will talk about this tomorrow after church, she said in a calm voice. I thought to myself, Her voice is almost too calm."

As my mother closed the door behind her, I felt relieved. Just as soon as I felt relieved that I was not getting a whipping for coming in late, I immediately began to think about not being able to see Edward the next day. I had promised him I would meet him at the Southside Park after church. How was I going to tell my new love, my first love, my endless love, that I could not see him tomorrow? I knew that he would be highly disappointed in me and without a doubt he would really call me a big baby now. How dare my mother treat me like a child? I am fifteen years old. I’m old enough to take care of myself, I thought. Man, I can’t wait ‘til I get grown, I’m leaving here as soon as I turn eighteen years old," I said under my breath so that my mother would not hear me.

That night as I lay in bed, I re-lived the moments that I had spent with Edward. I had such a marvelous time dancing with him, talking with him, laughing with him, and holding hands with him. But when he kissed me, Yuck, I thought that I was go-ing to die. The kissing thing was the most disgusting thing in the world to me. Is it supposed to be like this? I thought as he continued for what seemed like an eternity. Girl, why you not kissing me back? he asked. I don’t know; I guess I just don’t like kissing, I shyly whispered. Why not? he asked. I just don’t, I explained. You just don’t know how to kiss, he said. I could tell by the tone of his voice that he was upset with me.

I drifted off to sleep with Edward’s words still on my mind. Then to my astonishment, ‘Ty-yow; Ty-yow,Ty -yow’. I woke up to my mother and her favorite switch tearing my butt up. "Don’t you ever in your life come in my house at twelve midnight! she said. Girl, who do you think I am? Do you think I am somebody to play with? she continued. No ma’am, Momma, I’m sorry, Momma, oooh, Momma, I won’t do it again, I promise, Momma, pleazzze, Momma, ahhh, Momma, I love you, Momma, I screamed at the top of my voice. I love you too, that’s why I’m whipping your tail," my momma told me as she continued what I thought would be the worst whipping of my life.

"Is love worth me going through all this? I thought to myself as I tried to get back to sleep. I had never received a 2:00 a.m. whipping before in my life. Is this Edward person worth losing my mother’s trust? I asked myself. I don’t know. Right now, all I know is this man has captured my heart and if my mother really cares for me, she will understand. I reasoned. My mother and I had never had a trust issue until now, but, Certainly it is not my fault," I tried to convince myself.

‘Pop!’ Robin, get your tail out of the bed before we be late for Sunday school, my mother yelled as she turned the light on again in my room. Mr. Steel will be here in a few minutes, she said. Momma, please give me a few more minutes, I begged. Unh, unh; didn’t nobody tell you to try to be grown and stay out all night. I guess you must be smellin’ your little drawers, she said, while walking out of my room, leaving the door wide open. Almost in tears, I rolled out of the bed onto the floor, hoping that would give me a little boost.

I cannot wait to get home, I thought to myself as I sat in church. The first thing I am going to do is crawl into bed. I might as well, I cannot go anywhere, I cannot talk on the phone, and I am too embarrassed to look my mom in the face. To be honest, I am actually humiliated. I am my mother’s only child and I know she expects more out of me than I gave her last night. At that moment, I wanted to cry. I never meant to hurt my mother; she had worked so hard to give me the things she never had when she was a child. "A child?" I thought to myself. Well, I am not a child anymore, I’m a teenager. I’m over half-grown, I tried to convince myself. Never-the-less, I loved my mother.

I can love two people at one time, can’t I? I asked