The Uncensored Word: God's Gift

© 2008 D. J. Bahr. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

First published by AuthorHouse 10/9/2008

ISBN: 978-1-4343-7757-9 (ebk)

ISBN: 978-1-4343-7755-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4343-7756-2 (hc)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2008908817

Printed in the United States of America

Bloomington, Indiana

Dedicated to:

Debra

In Memory of:

Grandpa

Special Thanks to:

Pat, Naked Mary, Carrie, Andre,

Stephen, and Angela

Contents

Introduction

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Endnotes

Introduction

I had always been driven to find something from the moment I was born. I was placed here with an overwhelming sense of mission. My first seven years were surrounded with illness. I was allergic to most everything, and my resistance to viruses was nearly non-existent. My journey began at my weakest point, seven months before the doctor decided to remove my tonsils and place me on allergy shots.

When my journey was complete, I found myself stopped at the top of a heavenly roller coaster. I had accomplished the impossible: I followed the path set before me, experienced what most people only read about, and was filled with wonder and disbelief; I was actually finished. The journey ended suddenly while I was suspended in flight way up in the sky, and I didn’t know how to act or react. I had ridden this roller coaster for so long it had become part of my routine life. The events that brought me to where I am today were astounding enough that I wanted to share them with the world.

The following stories are true experiences encountered in the life of D. J. Bahr. The names have been changed to protect the identity and privacy of those living. The content, although true, may be to frightening for the squeamish. I consider my experiences to be verification that we are not alone.

Chapter One

My Childhood

Spent most of my time with my mom, even though she didn’t seem to like me very much. She didn’t work, and with my brothers at school and dad at work, it was just the two of us. One day, she told me I was a mistake. When I told my dad, he was furious.

There was a lot of that. I was more of an inconvenience and burden than anything else. I spent most of my time outside during the day even though I would burn and freckle. I was an ugly child. But mom didn’t seem to care. Most days, the best part was when my dad came home from work.

Whenever people would visit, my mom would finally give me attention.

Watch this, she said to the visitor. Donna, get in here.

Here I am, I came in from the backyard.

Look at that ugly big freckle running down her nose.

I started to cry. My mom and the visitors laughed. I left the room crying.

I told you I could make her cry. She continued laughing as I went back outside to continue crying.

She’d been doing this my whole life. I’d never told anyone and figured she didn’t like having a daughter. But one day I was still crying when my dad came home.

Honey, what’s wrong? I walked over to him and sat next to him. Mom was in the kitchen making dinner.

Mom made me cry again, I whimpered.

Again? Tell me what happened today.

I told him how she always made me cry in front of company.

Listen to me. Don’t ever let her know she got to you. If you let it show, she will not stop. Don’t cry and she’ll stop. I know you’re little but you can do it. He paused for a moment. Don’t let anyone know they got to you.

But she’s my mom, I whimpered.

It’ll make things easier in your life. Don’t show your emotions. He paused for a moment and gave me a hug.

It took some time to get it under control, but I practiced controlling my emotions. I may have been young, but I had the best teacher in the world: my mom. She tested me on a regular basis, but Dad was right. Once she called me out to cry and I didn’t, she stopped using me as the entertainment. She found other ways to remind me she didn’t want me around, but at least I wasn’t crying for the company anymore. I must admit I preferred blending in to being the center of attention.

When looking at pictures from my youth, I’m reminded of my mother’s zero tolerance for me. Mom would push me out of the picture just before the flash, so there aren’t any of me with the family unless she wasn’t there or my dad was taking the picture. I guess if she couldn’t make me cry, tell me I was unwanted, or send me outside to get uglier, she would make sure there weren’t any permanent memories of me in her life by allowing me to take the photo.

Looking back, I realize my mother must have found it very difficult to care for her three children. As her third child, my continual sickness and need for medical attention must have been very draining and difficult for my mother to handle. Once I gained control of my emotions, my world became very peaceful. I found peace of mind within myself at a very early age. I would describe myself as someone who doesn’t ask for anything and is content to enjoy whatever comes my way. I did not know it then, but I found out later…I was being trained for the big event.

Chapter Two

Uncontrollable Laughter

My Aunt Maggie and I were the only ones home. She was sitting on the bed beside her suitcase, packing her things. I was standing in the doorway, watching my aunt pack. My three aunts had come to visit for a couple of weeks, and today was their last day. She volunteered to stay home with me while the rest of the family went out. I’d been sick for most of their visit and had just started feeling a little better.

I was almost seven years old and always sick. I didn’t feel sorry for myself about being sick all the time because this was how it had always been; it’s hard to be upset about something when you don’t know any different.

My aunt did not speak a word after my parents left. She went about her business as usual, and I just stood there watching her pack her suitcase. Everything had been fine, normal, until now. I felt the pressure of something squeezing into my back. Something or someone was trying to share the exact space I held. This thing, this person, this entity was inside me, inside my body with me.

The sound of laughter immediately filled the room. I was laughing hysterically, but it wasn’t me laughing. This entity was using me to laugh.

Aunt Maggie, folded clothes forgotten in her hands, stared at me. She squinted her normally smiling blue eyes with concern. The more concerned she looked, the louder I was forced to laugh. I sensed this entity was an immature male and somehow familiar with Aunt Maggie. The more concerned she appeared, the louder I would laugh. I was amused by the situation. It was like becoming tickled over something that would only make someone laugh if they were there in the moment. Now, hearing my hilarious laughter, I was in the moment. It was funny.

My aunt’s silence was broken when she asked, What’s so funny?

I was nearly doubled over laughing at this point.

What’s wrong with you?! she raised her voice, almost yelling at me.

I couldn’t answer her because the laughing was out of my control. As she continued to stare, it seemed she must have seen something in my face or recognized the laughter. Her expression quickly turned from concern to fear. She stood up quickly and attempted to distance herself from where I was standing.

What is wrong with you? she breathlessly questioned. Aunt Maggie took several steps backward and stumbled as she backed herself up to the nightstand. She never took her eyes off me.

When I ask you a question, you answer me. You hear? Now what is going on with you? She was trying so hard to take control of the situation.

Even though I had not moved a step, suddenly I knew I was being used to scare the hell out of her. As Aunt Maggie grew more and more deathly afraid of the situation, I began to question what was happening to my aunt.

Thoughts started pouring through my mind. I started wondering why she feared my laughter, why this wasn’t funny to her. I tried to reason that she was an adult and I was a child, so I couldn’t possibly frighten anyone so deeply. All I was doing was laughing uncontrollably.

But I knew something was wrong; I was generating extreme fear in another soul. And then the answer came. I couldn’t be the one doing this, and she knew it. Only the entity, the uninvited guest within my body, had the ability to produce such fear, and through me, it was doing just that.

I don’t know if I could have stopped the laughter. The entity departed when my parents returned home and just as I was beginning to question the situation myself. The entity left my body the same way it entered, and I was back to normal except for the tears of laughter that now flowed down my face.

New thoughts started pouring through my mind. What part did I play and what had I done wrong? I was just an innocent bystander. What was my aunt going to say to my parents? That I laughed? The truth is, I enjoyed laughing, and it had been a long time since I had laughed at all. How could that be a bad thing?

I never saw the entity. I only felt it enter, occupy, and leave my body. Aunt Maggie had to know something had entered my body. Or at least I assumed so, because she was an adult. When the entity left my body, I immediately became silent. I was as I was