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    May-December Winds: (And Dorothy, You're Not in Kansas Anymore)
    May-December Winds: (And Dorothy, You're Not in Kansas Anymore)
    May-December Winds: (And Dorothy, You're Not in Kansas Anymore)
    Ebook160 pages2 hours

    May-December Winds: (And Dorothy, You're Not in Kansas Anymore)

    By Lynette Love

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    About this ebook

    Dont let the title fool you! This is for people who are ready to be honest, are seeking answers, and are truly ready to handle the truth. May December Winds (And Dorothy, Youre Not In Kansas Anymore) Workbook is an excellent tool that begins ones healing process. It is for those who are ready to get to the root of their problems. Its exercises are intended to have the reader get to the core of their whys regarding their life from identifying life challenges to breaking bad habits and generational curses. You are empowered through being the author of your life and setting personal goals. Can you go farther? Relationships connect the book (of the same title) to the workbook - common factors (low self-worth, seeking love/attention, etc.) associated with the books subject matter: teen girls/older guys. The unresolved issues are addressed in root exercises of parental relationships: mother/daughter, father/daughter, siblings and a specific section for single mothers who are raising sons. No one is left out! Your Impact on Others Lives this means YOU! Family/friends/community take the Self-Assessment Test. Educators are to take the self-assessment test and are given and additional assignment a set of questions to determine if they should stay in their present profession. An alarmingly increasing number of educators are asking students to stay after class for more than extra help with their class work! Inappropriate teacher/student relationships are a subject that is talked about after it occurs. A prevention tool for the educator, its an opportunity to seek counseling before everyone loses in this predatory relationship. Move at your own pace and when ready to understand and accept - move forward and move on.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherAuthorHouse
    Release dateJan 23, 2006
    ISBN9781467073714
    May-December Winds: (And Dorothy, You're Not in Kansas Anymore)
    Author

    Lynette Love

    Lynette Love is a native of Detroit MI. Her talents include being a playwright and an inspirational speaker. She also works with artists to transition them from poverty to prosperity and is a program design consultant. Her way of giving back is to work with teens and the community at-large. A troubled teen, trying to cope with a chronic illness, she shares what propelled her into a life she wasn’t prepared for - early sexual activity, drug and alcohol abuse and at the breaking point -attempted suicide.It is apparent through her writing as to why she’s still here. Lynette Love speaks nationally but took a sabbatical only to come back with an even greater testimony. Her heart stopped when she had a massive heart attack. Her epiphany during her ‘death’ gives her a greater appreciation for life.

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      Book preview

      May-December Winds - Lynette Love

      AuthorHouse™

      1663 Liberty Drive

      Bloomington, IN 47403

      www.authorhouse.com

      Phone: 1-800-839-8640

      © 2009 Lynette Love. All rights reserved.

      No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

      First published by AuthorHouse 9/21/2009

      ISBN: 978-1-4259-0397-8 (sc)

      Library of Congress Control Number: 2005910766

      Printed in the United States of America

      Bloomington, Indiana

      Edited: Lynette Love

      Cover Concept: Lynette Love

      Contents

      May - December Winds

      Acknowledgements

      Special Acknowledgement

      Chapter 1

      Chapter 2

      Chapter 3

      Chapter 4

      Chapter 5

      Chapter 6

      Chapter 7

      Chapter 8

      Chapter 9

      Chapter 10

      Chapter 11

      Chapter 12

      Chapter 13

      Chapter 14

      Chapter 15

      Chapter 16

      Chapter 17

      Chapter 18

      Chapter 19

      About the Author

      May - December Winds

      The May wind blows as a daughter is born with

      A smooth gentle blowing that stirs your inner soul.

      And it beckons her to embrace it.

      So… smooth that it flows through the beautiful sandcastle

      The December wind rushes with a fierce

      chill that rips at her very bones

      And tears at her very soul.

      Daughter:

      Your sandcastles are being torn - a part.

      Your innocence is stripped layer by layer.

      Why?

      Because the December wind realizes that

      he doesn’t have much time left.

      And must leave his mark in the sand, which indicates

      I was here, I left my legacy

      In you, daughter

      Forever.

      - Lynette Love

      Acknowledgements

      To God, I give glory, honor and praise. It is because of His love, grace, and mercy that I am still on this earth to be able to share my experiences that may help a little sister out there. It also helps me heal myself. To my family: Mom and Granny, I’m glad I recognize how blessed I am to have you while we are still here together. To my sisters and brothers, I love you all and Brenda, ‘I miss you’. Thanks for the wisdom that you shared with me as your ‘Little Sister’. To my sons Michael and Malcolm X, - what a journey we’ve taken. I leave a legacy that you must pass on to your children.

      To my sister-friend, Halimah – thanks for feeding a struggling artist and balancing me. To Denise - you truly taught me a lot. In our friendship, you always supported me and taught me to live my dreams and life with ‘no regrets’. To Jazzii A. – You certainly are! To L.A. – Good Save! To Sylvester – At Last!

      To my friends, – thanks for a wonderful friendship. To Dr. Allen Cushingberry, our friendship is pure magic!

      To my host of nieces and nephews, you have seen me grow up with you and you know that it was ‘The Blood’ that covered me.

      Special Acknowledgement

      To Oprah Winfrey and Iyanla Vanzant for inspiring others, as well as I, to believe, achieve, and succeed in spite of…You never know whose lives you may touch.

      Forward

      I can remember how shocked and angry I was a few years ago when I visited my favorite arts and cultural festival. It was an annual event in Michigan that I had attended every year since I was in high school. I always looked forward to enjoying the African and Caribbean food, music and scenery.

      Well this particular afternoon was sunny and pleasant. I made my usual stroll through the plaza looking over the vendors who sold art, jewelry, clothing and other goods. I stopped in amazement when I reached one particular man’s station: I had occasionally seen some things I didn’t care for during the years that I attended, but never anything so obscene as this: Near the height of national controversy about criminal accusations that soul singer R. Kelly had engaged in sex with under-age girls, this vendor had decided to bring child pornography to my favorite summer event. Crudely wrapped and packaged with a label that read R. Kelly Sex Tape were videocassettes that apparently contained the widely circulated image of a man police believed to be the singer having his way with teenagers. I immediately began to look for a cop. I was outraged, but I didn’t say a word. I wanted to see the look on the vendor’s face when an officer walked up to the table and asked him what in the hell he had been thinking by offering this item to the public, let alone at a family affair.

      I’m still getting over my deep sense of disappointment because I didn’t find a single policeman to notify that day. I had to settle for telling the festival organizers to be on the lookout after the fact. I would like to think that maybe a fellow vendor or a customer showed up later and shamed this greedy and shameless porn pimp into locking his stash away. But the reality is that he may have actually had a few who bought the tape, out of lust or curiosity. In today’s society, it’s a disturbing and sad truth that girls in women’s bodies are treated with no special concern for their mental and emotional development as human beings.

      Lynette Love is one of the first and most sincere writers to seriously address this tragedy. In this day and age of low-rise jeans, thongs as fashion statements and explicit rap music, a book identifying the self-esteem issues that allow our daughters and granddaughters to be exploited is both timely and appropriate. Through her personal experience as a child in Detroit, who found herself the object of older men’s attention, Love helps reveal the concerns that leave our youth vulnerable. Meanwhile, using her knowledge as a caseworker and parent, she offers solutions. Her effort to provide suggestions for strengthening the lives and skills of youth and their parents is a contribution that should not be overlooked.

      Eddie B. Allen Jr., Author

      Low Road: The Life and Legacy of Donald Goines

      Preface

      This book is written to teens, their parents, and all who will play an important part in helping teens through this (very) trying time. They are experiencing peer pressure, social pressure, parental pressure, and maturational pressure from all the above, that will shape them into and through, adulthood.

      Educators and psychologists say that a child’s personality is developed by the time they are five years old. They have developed cognitive skills and sensory knowledge. The large motor i.e., running, jumping, walking and fine motor skills i.e., picking up things, holding objects with their hands and fingers are developing. Everything learned after that is used to help them decide what path to choose for the rest of their lives. We have a great responsibility to them to expose them to as many positive things as we can. We also must be able to discuss with them the negativity that they see and help them make good choices.

      This book addresses teen girls who are in intimate relationships with adult males. Its content focuses on the emotional impact of this relationship but as with any generational gap, most will experience some of the same conflicts. I also write this for all my sisters who have their own testimonies. I hope that you have a chance to reflect, begin the healing process, and begin to move forward. The best way to help you is by helping someone else.

      Our society romanticizes the older man – younger woman relationship, by calling it a May - December romance. In actuality, if you mix warm air with cold air you create a condition for a tornado. In comparison, the teenage girl is swept up by a cyclone of emotions, entangled with psychological and sexual debris that is thrown at her by this adult male as she develops into womanhood.

      Today, violence and sex dominate the airwaves under the guise of ‘entertainment’. We see it in music videos of ‘Gangsta Rap’ and ‘Hip Hop’ lyrics, etc. It caters to immature individuals who want to act out the fantasy. Therefore, not only are our teens believing the ‘hype’, it serves as a conduit for men to prey on young girls whom they believe are the women they see in the videos. It is as though society is succumbing to this degradation of women.

      I cry for my little sisters as I see how many are killed due to running away or hanging out with the wrong crowd. Some are innocent bystanders, while others are caught in the May - December winds that I write about. Some of their deaths are directly related to the abusive relationship; others die as a result of other pains and abuses they suffer in their lives.

      The parents, of our young people today, are from Generation X while their children are part of Generation Y. It is in the parent’s generation (X) that personal violence became more prevalent within society. Generation X (born between 1965 and 1980) is blamed for the societal disappearing values and decreased sensitivity to human compassion.

      We have a lot of work to do in order to slow the cycle of amoral and deteriorating values. This has taken the form of a lack of care and concern for other people. The individuals who exhibit these behaviors are not considered as the entire population of today’s youth. However, their numbers are increasing at a frightening rate. This demands that this increase be promptly addressed. Our children did not get this way on their own, but rather because we have failed to protect their inalienable right to a safe childhood. We owe them and if we renege on our debt, we also renege on the child. Then we are responsible for our societal decline.

      As adults, we continue to allow our youth to engage adult activities; sending a mixed message to them that gives approval to certain behaviors. For example, there are young people dancing in adult music videos that have adult themes and content. These under-aged children, in these music videos, are present to capture the younger audience and make the adult lyrical content seem ‘innocent’. What we have are pre-teens aspiring to emulate what they see and can identify with kids their own age. Parents, who aren’t paying attention, may see the kids in the video and buy the music for their kids thinking its age appropriate.

      Chapter 1

      How I Survived The Storm

      This May – December relationship is not new. It has existed for centuries. As proof of its existence, I look to my family. My grandmother and mother married older men. In the case of my grandmother, I’ve come to understand that it was not just a shotgun wedding. It was clearly a case of statutory rape that resulted in a pregnancy. It didn’t matter that the family ordered my grandfather to marry my grandmother. She felt that she was a child (14 years old) who was manipulated by a man (22 years old).

      She was forced into a situation and dealt with it for her children’s sake. Since this man was now her husband, she had to perform her ‘wifely’ duties. After years of abuse, they parted ways and my grandmother was left to raise 11 of her 13 children alone without financial support from her husband. Yet, back in the day this was how it was. It was also overlooked due to the devaluation of her gender. Women didn’t have the choices and opportunities that are available

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