Vignettes of a Wonderful Life!: The Amalgamated Autobiographies of Mary Maxine and Ralph Thomas Palmer

Pre-Amble:

Mary Maxine has two mottos that are well to keep for an abundant life:

1.      I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

2.      I’ll go where you want me to go, dear Lord. I’ll do what you want me to do. [from a beloved hymn.]

Ralph has four mottos that are well to keep for an abundant life:

1.      Remember, always talk to and obey the Lord each day!

2.      Thank God for the ability to see and enjoy beauty in all things;

3.      Have an adventure a day to add spice to life and keep boredom away.

4.      Find humor in each event, for a laugh a day gives the doldrums wings!

About the past eight decades:

Our good friend Sidney Spain, wrote about the decades through which we have lived. Rather than repeating that excellent information in this joint autobiography, we have put it in Appendix II. It is well worth reading!

WARNING: Some events in this autobiography may be too disturbing for those who are queasy about snakes, surgery and wounds so we recommend that such readers omit reading any of Ralph’s part of this volume.

Pre-Ramble:

A life without humor is a heavily burdened life. My hope for these vignettes of our lives was that they would bring an occasional chuckle for the reader. Whatever happened to fun and funny? Jesus used much humor and there are several delightful humorous stories and puns in the Old Testament as well. That is a good example to follow. But, of course, there are some events that are prosaic and not humorous that need to be included so that our children may know their parents better.

My Prayer

Give me a sense of humor, Lord,

One which will chase someone’s sorrows away,

One that brightens another’s life each day

‘Rousing butterflies of joy along the way.

Help me to see things optimistically;

To spread God’s love evangelistically,

To live my life incrementally,

Enthusiastically spiritual and lovingly,

Oh, God, I do pray, and pray fervently!

Amen

Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Philippians 4:4

BOOK I:

Our Parents And Family Backgrounds

Chapter 1

Mary Maxine’s Family Background

Mary Maxine’s Father: Mary Maxine’s father, Earl Jones, was born in 1898 in Western Grove, Arkansas. Earl had no middle name. During the second World War he was asked for his name. Earl Jones, he answered.

No, I mean your complete name.

Earl Jones.

But what is your middle name? his questioner asked.

I don’t have a middle name, Earl replied. The questioner wrote down Name: Earl None Jones. So, he was stuck with Earl None Jones for the remainder of the war.

The ancestry tree that we have starts with a Seaborn Jones, born in 1804. Earl’s parents were James Ira Jones, born in 1836 and Fanny Dulcene Osborn. They were married in 1895. Earl was one of their six children. He was born in 1898Earl grew up on a farm in Western Grove, Arkansas.

Mary Maxine remembers visiting her grandparent’s [Ira and Fanny’s] farm in Western Grove as a child. As her family could get there only occasionally, many family members visited at the same time in order to see each other. She recalls playing games such as Kick the Can and Hide and Go Seek, riding on their horse, and keeping food fresh in the community’s cool stream down the hill from their home. Ira died of painful cancer. Fanny—once she retired, she retired! She sat and rocked in a rocking chair on her front porch for her remaining years.

Earl was eager to learn. Following high school he enrolled in a Business School or College. After graduation he became an accountant for a railroad. Going on for an advanced education was quite rare in those days. A perfectionist, Earl did very well in school.

Earl met and married Dorothy Marie Speer, a girl in Harrison, Arkansas. He remained a railroad accountant until he retired and, then, worked as the accountant for Western Auto stores. Much later in life, he went back to college to become a realtor.

Mary Maxine’s Mother: We have much more information about Mary Maxine’s mother, Dorothy Marie Speer. She was born in 1900 and grew up in Harrison, Arkansas. Her ancestors go back to1040 AD and earlier with one member having fought in the battle of Hastings in 1066. Later ancestors include James Davis who was in the American Revolution. He started as an Ensign in February 1776 and increased in rank to Captain in August that same year. As a reward for his services in the war against England, he was granted land in Arkansas. There, he became one of the founders of the city of Harrison. Although qualified, Dorothy chose not to be one of the Daughters of the American Revolution [DAR]. Another of her ancestors was Jefferson Davis, President of the southern states during the War between the North and the South. Somewhere in the family there is a letter about him going up the Mississippi or the Missouri River by canoe.

Earl was a Mason and he and Dorothy were active members of the Eastern Star. Both Earl and Dorothy died of heart attack. He died just four days before his eighty fifth birthday. Dorothy died at age eighty three.

Chapter 2

Ralph’s Family Background

Ralph’s Mother: Dorothy [Dolly] Louetta Hagerman, Ralph’s mother, was born on October 18,1901 in the Umpqua Valley near Roseburg, Oregon. Her father, E. Martin Hagerman, did not support his wife, Daisy G. Hagerman, and their child Dorothy. They divorced, in 1905. Daisy was very ill, probably from malnutrition and the lingering results of what they called childbirth fever in those days. Her hair fell out during the fever and grew back a different color. Illness permanently crippled Daisy who had to be in bed for seventeen months and in a wheel chair for the rest of her life. Dolly was raised by her grandparents, Louis Decker, a Judge, along with their child, Bessie. Bessie had traveled the Oregon Trail by covered wagon when she was two years old. As I write this, I have two of the rifles that came to Oregon with her. One of them shot and killed a cousin or friend named Johnnie while out deer hunting. Bessie married Roy Edwards and they continued to care for the Decker farm for most of the rest of their lives. Roy got up every morning at about 4 am to do the chores and other work on the farm. He went to bed at about eight every evening. So, one can assume that the Deckers, Dorothy and Bessie followed much the same pattern.

Mother’s Finger: When she was quite young, Dolly’s grandfather had her hold some meat he was chopping up. A stroke of the cleaver severed the end of her left middle finger. The family quickly washed it with water, smeared it with butter and bound the two ends of her finger together. It grew back—with the finger nail on the bottom instead on top where it should have been.

The Church School: Dorothy and Bessie went to a one room building which served as their school and their church. They climbed a tree in front of the school. Both the church and the tree were still standing in 1940. It was a small, white, frame building. I, Ralph, preached my first real sermon in that church when I was fourteen. I still have the notes of that sermon in my files. It was a pretty good sermon, if I do say so.

The Bridge: A crew of carpenters were building a bridge over which the teenaged Dorothy, Bessie and other classmates walked on the way to school. Olaf Gideon Palmer was one of the carpenters. Dorothy said, That’s the man I’m going to marry. There was the usual teasing and scoffing at that declaration. After all, Gideon was an older man, eleven years Dolly’s senior. Dorothy married Gideon on her eighteenth birthday on October 18, 1919.

The Courting: One hand driving: I know little of their courting except for a warning my Dad gave me when I first started to drive a car. Keep both hands on the steering wheel when dating a girl, he charged. When he was courting Mom, he put one arm around her while driving a Model T Ford along a dirt road. He lost control. Two wheels of the car went up an embankment on the side of the road and the car rolled over.

Squirrel shooting: Trying to show off to his sweetheart Dad tried to shoot a squirrel which had perched on the end of a fallen tree spanning a ravine on the Decker farm. He missed and was teased about that for years. That dead tree still remained across the ravine when I was fourteen. Louis, my brother, and I shot many lizards and a few squirrels from the same end that Dad had showed off his skill so many years before.

Dorothy’s Occupations: Both because of the need for an extra income and because she didn’t care for staying at home, Dorothy got jobs wherever we lived. This meant that my brother, Louis—six years older than I—was saddled with caring for me for which I owe him much gratitude. In the early nineteen thirties, my mother worked in a fish cannery. Prior to World War II, my mother was a Real Estate agent. She drove a bus in San Diego, California during the war and was a staff member in the mental hospital in Camarillo, California once Dad returned from Alaska and built a home in Oxnard, California for her, Dad and my sister, Dorothy. They had an old dog at that home. It slept under the house and snored so loudly that it kept everyone awake at night.

Dorothy’s Death: A smoker for many years, Mother died in 1978 of congested bronchi. She was living in a small house. Unable to breath, she ran to a neighbors door. Before the neighbor could do anything for her, she collapsed on the porch and died.

Ralph’s Father to America: Our cousin, Francis G. Winner, compiled a wonderful genealogy of our Swedish family which includes the ancestry of Olaf Gideon Palmer, my Dad. He was born on March 1, 1891 with his birth registered in Goteborg (Gothenburg) but probably actually born in a farm community about 15 miles from Alingsas. However, records show that his father, August, went ahead of the family to Hull, England en route to Canada on the ship S. S. Secian because the captain of the ship, SS Romeo, refused to take his wife, Amanda, a pregnant woman, aboard. So, it is possible that he was born in the city. He, his siblings and mother shipped to Canada when Dad was six months old. Dad didn’t tell me much about his childhood but he did share some memories with me beginning with some tall tales about seeing whales as the family crossed the ocean.

A Good Boy: I once asked my grandmother if Dad had been a good boy as a child. She assured me that he was never a problem child. Dad, however, tells of racing through the house as a boy and leaping onto a bed on which Grandmother had laid out five pies to cool. He said he got into trouble over that. Also, the owner of a house in Wetaskiwin, Canada where they lived until moving to the United States, said that he bought the house which may have been the Palmer home, from a Swede who had built it and who had a bunch of wild kids running around.

The Name Change: In Sweden it is not uncommon for a person to change his or her family name. For example, a cousin who served in the Swedish Parliament for fifty years changed his name from Johanson to Antby because there were so many Johansons as to create confusion. Sometime after arriving in the Americas, the family name was changed from Johanson to the good old English name of Palmer. Dad once told me of riding on a horse drawn wagon with his father in Modesto, California when he was ten. I believe they were Palmers by then.

The Indian Taking a Baby: My Dad told me an interesting story which I was led to believe referred to one of his sisters. According to the genealogy written by cousin Francis Winner this may have happened to one of my aunts, Judith or Florence. Dad said it happened in Canada. Florence and her sister, Judith, both were born in Wetaskiwin, Alberta, Canada, Judith in 1896 and Florence in 1898, so they were babies there. My dad also was very young as he came to Canada from Sweden in 1891 when he was but six months old.

While the family lived in Canada, an Indian woman’s child died. The child was buried in a tree up on a branch or scaffold as some indians did or in a hollow part of a tree—I don’t know. My understanding always has been it was the latter. The bereaved Indian mother, and others in her group, saw the Palmer baby as they walked by my grandparent’s home. So, she picked up the Palmer baby and continued on toward her destination. The Palmer adults quickly rescued the child.

The Indian explained her actions this way: she, among a group of other Indians, was passing by and saw the Palmer baby. She saw that there were several children in the family and hers had died so she had none. Apparently the Indian woman conjectured that this family had many children and she had lost hers which was unfair. So, she tried to replace her dead baby with one of the Palmer infants. She thought it only fair that she have one of the Palmer babies since the Palmer woman, my grandmother Amanda, had so many.

Dad’s Occupation and Death: Dad worked in the Seattle ship yards during World War I, as a carpenter and, later, as a building contractor in San Diego, California, a government carpenter in Alaska during World War II and built homes and churches in Oxnard and Ventura, California until he retired. When they retired, Dad and Mom moved into the mountains above Jackson near Pioneer, California, where Dad continued to build homes including their own. The Pioneer home was on a steep slope. It had a large back room the width of the house with a back door. But, there were no steps to the ground from the doorway. Had one unknowingly stepped out that door he or she would have fallen for fifteen feet before hitting ground.

After several strokes and other heart problems, Dad died of a heart attack on February 21, 1973 in Jackson, Calif. where he was taken by ambulance from his home in Pioneer. We knew he really was dead when we heard the choir from a local church at his funeral sing. They did their best, bless them, but it sounded like the howling of banshees yet Dad didn’t respond. I almost expected him to sit up in protest. Of course, he used to turn his hearing aids off when things got too noisy so—!

The End of BOOK I.

BOOK II:

Our Childhood 1926-41

Chapter 1

Our Births And Earliest Lives:

1926-1927

Our Auspicious Beginnings: We were Born. Now, we begin. How does one find humor in being born? Our births weren’t funny. In fact, we both loudly and tearfully protested the indignity of being thrust into a new cold world and to tell our mothers that we were not a bit happy about the process.

Mary Maxine Jones was born in Harrison, Arkansas on January 8, 1926 to Dorothy Speer Jones and her husband Earl Jones, an accountant for a railroad. James Tilford Jones also was born in Harrison about fifteen months after Mary Maxine. Kenneth Earl Jones was born in Quanah, Texas several years later. He was the largest newborn of the three.

My brother, Louis Gideon Palmer was born in Tillamook, Oregon on August 29, 1920. He weighed in at more than twelve [12] pounds. That must have been quite a strain on a naive young woman of nineteen who had come from the mountain farm in Oregon just ten months and eleven days earlier.

I was born in National City, California on March 18, 1926 and I erupted at over eleven [11] pounds. I always tried but never could keep up with Louis.

My sister, Dorothy Elizabeth Palmer, was born on September 8, 1931. My mother seems to have learned a bit over those eleven years as Dorothy was the smallest, born at over ten [10] pounds in Pacific Beach, California. At 12 pounds then 11 pounds and then 10 pounds, the reduction in baby size was significant. Mother had a miscarriage in 1937 so that baby probably would have come into the world at a little over 9 pounds. [How times have changed! As I type this in 2010 the normal child should be born at a bit over seven pounds. But, in those days, it was thought that an infant should be round and packed with baby fat to be healthy.]

Chapter 2

Mary Maxine’s Early Life

Because they were so close in age, Mary Maxine and Tilford were like twins. I do not know of their infancy nor toddler years.

The Moves to Quanah, Texas: Probably in July, 1927, when Tilford was three months old, the family moved to Galveston, Texas to live in a house on Q Street near the beach. Mary Maxine’s father, Earl Jones, continued working as a railroad accountant. She remembers some of her life there, such as seeing a Ferris Wheel not far from their home. When she was three, her father was transferred to Muskogee, Oklahoma, and, later to Quanah, Texas. Quanah was and is a dry, dusty and hot town in north Texas. Dust blew all the time, often in huge dust storms. Mary Maxine’s mother had all she could do keeping the dust out of the house let alone tending to a husband and two little children. She often must have felt despair. She deserves a medal of courage. Earl, also, had to work daily, in all that heat, in the days before air conditioning, to support his family. But, he was fortunate in that he still had a steady job as an accountant for the railroad and, being a perfectionist, did his work with care and precision.

The Great Depression: Of course, the economic crash of 1929 brought on the Great Depression but Mary Maxine and Tilford rarely were touched by it. She remembers little else than seeing some of the unemployed men coming to their back door asking for food and her mother feeding them. Working for the Quanah, Acme and Pacific Railroad, Earl brought in a modest but steady income which put the family into a higher level of living than the many who could not find work.

Her Daily Life: Mary Maxine lived the normal, placid, church centered life of any girl of a modestly well to do family in a small Texas town. She and her brother Tilford were inseparable during their preschool years. Her mother arranged parties and other activities for her children as they grew. Just the making of decorations was fun in those days when one couldn’t buy decorations. One of those parties she well remembers. One of the houses they lived in had bedroom closets that opened into a bedroom on the other side of the wall. They also had a big basement. That was ideal for a Halloween party. With spooky decorations, it must have been wonderful. One problem was that one guest had broken a leg and Earl had to carry the girl all around the house, upstairs and down.

Mary Maxine’s Flirt With Death: When she was aged four or five, Mary Maxine came down with what the doctor called Intestinal Flu. She was so sick that the doctor didn’t think she could survive in spite of all he could do for her. She remembers her parents changing her from her bed into the guest room. That was a highlight as it was very special lying in that bed. The room had a side door that led out to some steps. Her father carried her outside and tenderly held her on his lap on those steps to gain what she could from sunlight. She remembers the minister’s wife, Mrs. Chasteen kneeling beside the bed and praying for her recovery. She finally began to get stronger and finally got well, considered a miracle by some.

Chapter 3

Mary Maxine Tells Her Own Story

I urged and urged Mary Maxine to write down some of her memories of her childhood. But that was quite difficult for her. Here is what she finally wrote:

"Summer Trips: Since my Dad was an Accountant for the railroad, we were lucky—we got free tickets on the railroad to go anywhere. Every summer we had exciting trips to see relatives who lived in various states—California, Arizona, Missouri, Arkansas and Kentucky. For this reason, we seldom saw our relatives. But, in seeing them, it meant we also got to see much of our beautiful country. These were exciting trips for three reasons:

1.      To get to know and enjoy family,

2.      To get to see a wide variety of our nation;

3.      We returned home full of exciting material for school papers on the places to which we had gone and the things we had seen, such as a big 4th of July Indian Pow Wow in Flagstaff, Arizona.

All of these experiences were rare for people who lived in a small Texas town such as Quanah.

Christmas: Christmas—was always special, but our little church in Quanah had one tradition that was particularly rare for Christmas Eve. The older youth and adults would meet in someone’s home to play table games, sing and eat, of course, until midnight. We would have a short devotional time, then we would bundle up to go out caroling in the crisp night air. We silently would approach the home of the elderly or shut-ins or even the hospital and begin singing the carols. Sometimes we even were invited in for a welcome treat of hot chocolate and cookies. Contrary to what you might think, that people would not appreciate being awakened at the wee hours of the night, it was quite the opposite. They always felt honored and happy to be chosen for the visitation—like the shepherds and Angels. We would all depart for home around 2:00 a.m. feeling truly prepared for Christmas. I still remember the thrill I felt when my Daddy first decided I was old enough to go along."

Chapter 4

More Of Her Story

Earl was a good father: He did his best for his children. Just before each Christmas in Quanah, he went out into the cedar brakes and cut branches which he wired together to make their Christmas trees. Earl made a gym set in the yard which provided much pleasure for the children.

Bicycles: At first, Tilford and Mary Maxine had no bicycle. Finally, they got a used one and Tilford would pump Mary Maxine to school with her perched side saddle on the bar between the seat and the handlebars. It wasn’t the most comfortable way to ride the mile to school. Later, the family was able to afford a new bicycle so she and Til both could have one. She had many happy hours riding back and forth through the little town of Quanah. She had boyfriends, one who came and sang outside her window, and one or more who sent her love letters and candy.

Kenneth: Mary Maxine’s younger brother, Kenneth, was born on March 2, 1937, when Mary Maxine was six years old. He grew up determined to tease and annoy his older sister. For example, he had been taught that one doesn’t eat any food that others had touched. So, when he found a box of chocolates a beau had given to Mary Maxine, he took a bite out of each piece in the box so he could have all of the candy. Kenneth was the type who, when he had done something naughty would go to his mother, Dorothy, and ask her to spank him and get it over with. [He was the typical type of boy who went into the ministry and he became a fine minister following seminary.]

One day, even before he could read, Ken stood outside the Jones’ house pretending to read a love letter to Mary Maxine in his loudest voice. Terribly embarrassed, Mary Maxine begged her mother, Do something. Go stop him.

I can’t, Dorothy replied, I’m laughing too hard.

Mary Maxine’s Schooling: Because of her birth date, Mary Maxine’s school schedule was a problem. Her birthday, being in January, she was unable to enter school at the beginning of the school year. She was very eager to begin school. She began her first grade in midterm so she was behind from the start. Her parents quickly realized this presented a problem since most of the mid-term students were there because they had failed the first semester. Her parents felt it wasn’t enough of a challenge for her. She was very intelligent. She was sent to summer school after the sixth grade in order to start High School with the more advanced students. This truly presented a challenge because, at that time, Texas combined the curricula of the seventh and eighth grades into one summer semester, a mighty heavy load, which Mary Maxine took. But, she completed it satisfactorily. Also, Texas schools only went though the eleventh grade. So, she graduated from High School at age sixteen.

The Band: When Mary Maxine was about twelve or thirteen she saw an older student named Jobe, wearing a tall fur hat, leading the school band as their Drum Major. She remarked to her mother that it might be fun being in the school band. As a result, both Mary Maxine and Tilford got in the band. Mary Maxine started by playing the clarinet. Wanting someone dependable who would take good care of an instrument, the band director changed Mary Maxine to playing the one and only bass clarinet owned by the school. For the same reason, Tilford was asked to play the oboe.

The constantly blowing, strong wind whipped dust and gravel as hard against Mary Maxine’s legs as to scratch them painfully when she walked outside. She was a tiny girl. She carried her big bass clarinet in its weighty case when walking home to keep the wind from blowing her over. It was heavy and often banged her shins.

Kenneth Stops to Rest: Mary Maxine and Tilford played in the marching band and Kenneth was the band’s mascot. Dressed in a band uniform, he proudly marched along in front of the band during a parade in Shamrock, Texas. However, his short legs got tired along the route so Ken moved out of ranks and sat down on the curb to rest. Marching along, Mary Maxine saw her little brother there but didn’t know what to do. Their parents were further along the route of march. She couldn’t leave her place in the band. So, all the rest of the parade, she worried about him. Things turned out OK, however and the family got together in time to go back to Quanah.

Spanish: Mary Maxine was taught Spanish by a teacher who knew very little of the language. The class was asked to sing in Spanish for the Lion’s Club. As everyone in the class could count to ten in Spanish, the teacher had the class sing, uno, dos, tres, cuatro, cinco, seis, siete, ocho, nueve, dies over and over to the tune of South of the Border.

Expression Lessons Verse Speaking Choir and Debate: Mary Maxine was in the Verse Speaking Choir, had expression lessons and took honors on the Debate team. These all helped to allay some of her shyness and contributed to her later fame as a public speaker and soloist. [As will be seen, she became one of the best speakers on behalf of missions in the United States and Canada.]

Summer Employment: When she was in her early teens, Mary Maxine worked at the M.E. Moses Dime store in Quanah to earn what she could in cash and experience. Tilford worked in a Rexall drug store.

Mary Maxine’s Shyness, Her Christ Centeredness and God’s Help: Mary Maxine grew up as a very petite, shy and naive Christian girl. She was ten and Tilford nine years old when they were baptized. The Church was her primary interest throughout her childhood and, ultimately, throughout her entire life. As she matured, her devout parents, aided by the ministers, teachers and youth groups in the church, taught her much about right and wrong. [One of her ministers was the grandfather of the, current in 2010, Attorney General of Texas.]

Mary Maxine’s Singing: Mary Maxine was to sing in church one time when she was quite young, between 12 and 14. She, timidly, stood up in front and sang, but her mother, who sat on the front pew, claimed Mary Maxine sang so quietly that she couldn’t hear her. [Later, Mary Maxine became an excellent soloist.]

Tabling the Songfest: She went to the church camps and conferences at Ceta Glen, a Christian camp ground on a canyon that runs into the historic Palo Duro canyon. One day at another conference in Glen Rose, Texas there was no song leader and the director asked Mary Maxine to lead the campers in some songs and games. Extremely shy, she was about to refuse when she remembered both Bible verses asserting that God will help her and her mother’s words saying she must attempt to do whatever God wanted her to do. She had to stand on a table to be seen as she led the singing. She was exceptionally good at leading singing. And, after that, she was asked to lead the singing at many churches, camps and other meetings for most of her adult years after that.

Her Call to Ministerial Service: The conferees were in a closing worship service at the camp. Mary Maxine was fourteen years old. The minister offered the invitation for anyone wishing to commit his or her life to ministerial service to come forward. Mary Maxine looked up and clearly saw the figure of Jesus. He beckoned to her to come forward. She did. And, she never lost that call.

Now, there was a time when I would not have believed that. Or, more likely, I would have explained the vision scientifically instead of believing it out right. She did not tell me about this event until I was writing this but she kept it close in her heart. However, I believe she is convinced that she actually saw Jesus beckon to her and here is why. Mary Maxine does not believe in lying. I have never known her to tell a lie in all the six and a half decades we have known each other. So, I believe her.

On to College and T & P: Mary Maxine graduated from High School at age sixteen. Her parents moved to Dallas her first year at Texas Christian University [TCU]. She was too young for college at age sixteen but concluded the Freshman year with good grades. She worked at the Colonial Cafeteria near school for some meals and a minimal salary to help get through. She was too short to serve behind the serving counter so they put her on as a receptionist.

The following summer and school year, she worked as a file clerk for the Texas and Pacific railroad. We were well into World War II by then so, although a tiny girl, she had a big, important job.

We Meet: She went back to TCU the next term to finish her bachelors with a double major in Christian Education and psychology. I was sent to TCU by the navy and was in a meeting sitting right behind this cute little chick. I don’t remember speaking to her then. We both became members of the TCU choral group which is where I met her for the second time. I was introduced to her by Bob Matheny who probably told me only her first name. I went to California to be with my parents for the Christmas vacation and intended to write to her. But, I couldn’t remember her last name.—-—It’s difficult to remember a name like Jones.

Chapter 5

Ralph’s Early Life

Stories My Parents Told me About My Earliest Days: I was born in National City, now a suburb of San Diego, California. My guess is that Mom, Dad and Louis had just moved to the San Diego area. The family lived in a tent during my struggle to grow enough to be born. The tent caught on fire and it was a miracle that we all got out.

Our family always enjoyed a good joke. When nursing me, mother squeezed out a glass of her milk which she served to my father for dinner. He always was a picky eater, preferring meat and potatoes, but he did like milk. I can imagine how he felt when he found out where the milk came from.

I started eating solid food at four months and have been eating ever since. When I was eight or nine months old my mother taught me to walk holding onto a broom stick. I was not aware when she let go of the end she was holding so I happily paraded around the kitchen until gravity enforced itself—probably my first lesson in the sciences.

I developed some teeth and practiced using them by biting my brother. Even after a few scoldings and spankings I continued to put the bite on Louie. So, something had to be done to stop me. Mother ordered Louie to bite me back. He cried because he didn’t want to do it. Nevertheless, he obeyed and I learned that putting the bite on someone could cause that person some significant pain.

Chapter 6

Ralph Aged Four

Aged 3 and 4: My memories begin at age three. I know the time because I can remember Christmas Eve when I was four and we moved before I turned five. Dad was a carpenter and mother worked in a cannery packing Tuna. She took me to the cannery and I still clearly remember the huge containers in which the cans of tuna were cooked. Not all memories are reliable, however. I clearly remember the nightmare I had after seeing the movie King Kong. It took place in that same house and I recall the gorilla’s huge arm reaching for me through my bedroom window. I was four in 1930. However, I read that that movie came out in 1935. Could we have gone to a preview of the movie? In California it’s possible!

The Shivaree: The family who lived next door were from the Philippines. Their friends and neighbors put on a shivaree at their house one evening probably because they were newly married. The yelling and clanging of pots and pans was VERY loud. It was a new experience for me.

Sabbath Day School: The family in the house across the street were Seventh Day Adventists who took me to their Sunday [on Saturday, Sabbath?] School each week until I rebelled. I don’t know what they taught but I didn’t like it. Nor, did I like having to dress up just to have my Saturdays messed up. What I remember most clearly is my mother washing my face with rough wash rags to get me ready to go to church. The rags must have had sand and gravel in them because I can still feel the scraping as I type this—and I am 85 years old. [Those wash rags held true ‘rocks of ages!"] I have disliked, and almost hated, Sunday School ever since except when I could learn something new. I have almost always enjoyed learning something new which must be a statement about what they taught.

Streaking: Mother gave me a bath one day but I managed to escape the