Overcoming Rejection: Through the Love of God: My Story

© 2013 Tasha Brown. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 09/27/2016

ISBN: 978-1-4817-4180-4 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4817-4179-8 (e)

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Contents

Acknowledgements

Introduction

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7—Knowing Our Identity

Chapter 8—God’s Unconditional Love

Chapter 9—You Are Accepted

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I PRAY THIS BOOK MINISTERS to you who are reading it, as much as it did to me as I was writing it. When God prompted me to write my story, I had just overcome a major battle with rejection. It wasn’t until after I came out of the battle, that the Lord revealed to me the magnitude of the root of the rejection. That moment began my healing process.

I want to thank my birth mother and daddy whom I love ever so dearly. I am more proud of the two of you than anyone else in this world. Thank you for giving me life. To my spiritual parents, Apostle Benny and Prophetess Geraldine Dozier, you guys are the best. Thank you for imparting into me all of who you are and laying a strong Christian foundation in my life. To Dr. Creflo and Pastor Taffi Dollar, my current pastors, the revelation that comes from you is absolutely dynamic. Thank you for your obedience to God. To my loving children William, Rafael, and TaJuan, words cannot express the love I have for you. I know our process has not been easy, but our latter shall be greater than our past. Thank you for your endurance. To my cousin Shawn, thank you for letting the Lord use you to speak to me concerning the book. I love you. To every single person that helped me along the way, may God continue to bless you and bring you a reward for every good deed done for my family and me. To my aunt Melinda, who played a major role in our transition to Atlanta, thank you for lallowing God to use you. I pray a Cornelius blessing overtake your household.

INTRODUCTION

THE SPIRIT OF REJECTION IS a spirit that plagues many people in our society today. The number of people who are affected is staggering. Rejection attacks a person’s identity and falsely accuses God and others for not loving them. When in reality, God has never stopped loving His people. In life, when we experience trials and tribulations, we sometimes wonder, does God care? Is He near? Is He for me? But no matter what we experience in life, what we go through – nothing can separate us from God’s love. Romans 8:35 (NLT) says - Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? As you read further within that same chapter, you will see the response to that question. "And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord." You see, God’s love for His people is unconditional.

Webster defines rejection as the refusal to accept, consider, submit to, take for some purpose, or use, to throw something away. It is experienced when a person doesn’t feel accepted. Rejection can be deep rooted. It can originate from the womb. A child, as a product of a rape, may feel rejection from conception if they are unwanted. A child may feel abandoned and neglected by its parents and experience the pain of rejection. A person may experience rejection from being in an adulterous relationship, or rejection may cause them to settle for an adulterous relationship. When a relationship ends, the person who is left feeling abandoned may feel the pain of rejection. Like all emotionally painful experiences, the pain level involved in rejection is based upon who in our life is rejecting us.

The main reason rejection hurts is because it attacks our identity – whether male or female. It can leave us with a host of unanswered questions –What’s wrong with me? What did I do? Why aren’t I good enough? There’s an emotional void that cannot be filled. I’ve seen people outfit it in all kinds of fashions. I’ve seen people shop to attempt to fill the void. Some may purchase the most lavish possessions or put on airs or facades that they are living a perfect life. While there is absolutely nothing wrong with living the life God has designed for us, if there is a motive behind our actions, the image of a perfect life has rejection at its roots. One year while I was at a Megafest Conference hosted by Bishop T.D. Jakes in Atlanta, Georgia, I saw a gentleman clothed in a red dress and devil’s horns with platform heeled shoes. He paraded around the entire campus of the Georgia Dome to gain attention from all who witnessed him. Although most of the attention was negative, it was attention nonetheless and thereby yielded the results he’d set out to gain. Rejection is not biased as to which kind of attention it receives.

I’ve seen, and have even done it myself at some time in my life, women dress in provocative or inadequate clothing to gain attention from others. I would even go so far as to say the fad of sagging pants that has attacked our young male generation is directly linked to an identity crisis and rejection can be found at the root. Some of the behaviors of our school-aged children are attention -seeking behaviors. Research has shown that in the home of a child suffering from behavioral issues, that child is either not feeling valued or not receiving adequate affection or attention – as you will see was the case in my life. But there are times when the spirit won’t allow a person to receive love, no matter how much love is being shown to them. That happens when a stronghold had been built and it takes the anointing of God to break it down. Of course, the person must be in agreement for that to happen.

Rejection in itself is not sin. It’s the reaction to rejection that can lead to serious sin, which is referred to as the fruit of rejection. A person can open themselves up to unclean spirits and behavior that lead down a road to destructive paths. There are lots of fruit that manifest from the spirit of rejection. One may become bitter, angry, passive or promiscuous. Sometimes fruit can be projected as one turning to homosexuality because of hurt or rejection from the opposite sex. Rejection causes some people to become perfectionists and correct about everything. You may see violence manifest, fear, rebellion, guilt, control/witchcraft, inconsistency, or introversion.

For me, the root of rejection didn’t come solely from the lack of affection I received from my parents; it also came from the accuser, Satan, telling me God didn’t love me (the seed planted) which ultimately produced fruit of promiscuity, rebellion, insecurity, fear, and a very opinionated attitude to say the least. For all of my childhood and most of my adult life, I believed Satan. Even after God saved me, I questioned His love for me because I was basing it from a standpoint of man’s conditional love. If I was receiving tangible blessings from God, He loved me. But when I was going through trials or tribulations, God didn’t love me or He was mad at me…so I thought. But that was far from the truth. The accuser had been deceiving me for years, and it wasn’t until I received the truth of God’s love, that I was able to receive His Agape (unconditional) love and gain victory over rejection. John 8:32 NKJV says, And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free. And the truth is — absolutely nothing can stop God from loving us. The victory is in receiving the love of God. That revelation came to me when I realized that NOTHING could stop God from loving me. Even if I experienced a test or trial, He still loves me. I can be sure of that.

As you read my life story, you will be able to see how that spirit held me captive. However, in spite of what the enemy did, God had a plan for me. And He has a plan for your life too.

At the end, I will list reference scriptures and biblical truths for you to meditate on and put into practice, which will also help you, to obtain victory over rejection by receiving the Agape love of God. We will look over our identity and who we really are to God and in God. We will see what Jesus has done for us that made us right with God. As a believer, you are in right standing with God and He is not mad or upset with you. In fact, He loves you more than words can express. His love is so great for the world that He sent His only begotten son, that whosoever shall believe in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life (John 3:16). That’s powerful! I have three sons and I can’t imagine giving anyone of them to die for someone else’s wrong doings. But God did. And not only that, Jesus was fully aware of His purpose for coming and accepted the assignment. He showed to the world His love for us all. The bible confidently states that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for the ungodly (Romans 5:6). So before we had a chance to get it together, before we knew we’d have an abortion, a child out of wedlock, lie, cheat, or steal, before we knew we’d do any of these things, Christ had already died for our sins. And because of His actions, forgiveness has been made available to us. That’s the power of God’s Agape love. Unless you receive it by faith, then there will always be a question as to whether God really loves you or not. This must be settled. Say it – God Loves ME! Please continue to read past my story so that you can learn what I learned that led me to the path of Overcoming Rejection through the Love of God!

CHAPTER 1

IN RETROSPECT, I CAN SEE that I first began wrestling with rejection as early as seven years old. At the time, of course, I couldn’t see it. I remember always wanting to be accepted. I was an intellectual who got good grades in elementary school, often achieved honor roll, and yet I was ridiculed. So I would stop trying my best.

As a young girl, in the summer time, we were allowed to stay out late and play despite my grandmother’s attempt to get us in the house at a decent time. Street lights on, it’s time to come in! she would say in a loud whisper. She’d stand at the front door and flicker the light on and off repeatedly; that was our signal. Our parents would still be outside and we’d beg and barter to stay out longer. Can we just stay in the front? my cousins and I would campaign. We’d ask our moms and their decision would out rule Granny’s.

My mother was young. Entering motherhood at a tender age and living in financial hardship, she was too young to understand adulthood, not to mention parenting. So our persistence would win and we’d get to stay out later. One or two o’clock in the morning and a few of us neighborhood children were still outside and my concerned Granny would be awake, coming to the door from time to time checking on us.

My Granny is a passive Christian woman. She accepted Jesus as her Lord and Savior, and chose Catholicism as her faith to follow. She is a very noble and hardworking woman. She earned an honest living at a local hospital as a medical biller. Divorced when my mom was still an infant, she moved back home from Baltimore, Maryland to Gary, Indiana to a life of struggle and poverty. She wasn’t the go-getter type. Neither was she a loose woman. She doesn’t drink, smoke or use profane language. She is just Granny, always wanting the best for her children, but not being able to provide it. She made due with what she had.

Back then people had no real knowledge of the Holy Spirit as we do today. Speaking in tongues was spooky and only something sanctified people did. It wasn’t understood that sanctified only meant set apart and that it wasn’t a different denomination. They didn’t have the understanding we now have that Jesus promised us One who would come and be with us forever, live in us and empower us - John 14:16-17. She didn’t have that knowledge and because of that, Granny just accepted what was.

She was a neighborhood grandmother nonetheless. Every Sunday she’d take her four children to church. The neighborhood kids seeing her consistency were looking for spiritual guidance themselves and would go along with her to church. Granny has a heart of gold. Although she is passive, she is one to be counted on. She did not have many words of advice, and when asked for it she would simply say ‘use your best judgment’. She did the best she knew how since she was left to raise her four children alone. She chose to remain single after her divorce so there was no father figure around and raising four children all alone was no easy task. She had two May babies, and two June babies and they were only months apart. While she was at work, the children were at home and began