As the Sweet Honey Runs

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© 2013 . All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 9/20/2013

ISBN: 978-1-4918-1819-0 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4918-1817-6 (hc)

ISBN: 978-1-4918-1818-3 (e)

Library of Congress Control Number: 2013916988

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CONTENTS

Acknowledgments

Introduction

Chapter 1     The Honey Runs Deep

Chapter 2     Living In Fear

Chapter 3     It’s All In Your Mind

Chapter 4     An Angel In My Pocket

Chapter 5     Deep Waters

Chapter 6     Relationships

Chapter 7     Beautiful Tears

Chapter 8     Living On The Edge

Chapter 9     Criticism

Chapter 10   Losses

Chapter 11   Storms In Life

Chapter 12   The Journey Of Life

Chapter 13   Over the Rainbow

Chapter 14   Final Closure

Hotlines

Resources

Websites

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

W riting a book for publication isn’t an easy task. It takes much planning and diligence to successfully complete such a project. This is a continuation of my first book, As The Scarlet Tanager Sings. Both books have been inspirational and self-healing to me. They have been uplifting and encouraging to say the least.

I want to thank my family, especially my parents and sisters for their support and reassurance. Without them, I couldn’t have finished such a project.

Much thanks to my sister for providing me healing confessions and scriptures. At the time, they were given to me after my neck surgery. They have added so much to the depth of the books.

I would like to thank my friends and acquaintances who gave positive feedback. It means a lot to me and I’m appreciative.

A special thanks to the Courtesy of AuthorHouse for the image of the front cover. Without them, I couldn’t have had this book published. My gratitude goes out to all those who contributed to the publishing process.

I give many thanks to all those who directly and indirectly influenced the writing of this book. Thank you for continuing to be supportive and guiding me in the right direction.

INTRODUCTION

L ife is full of sweetness and bitterness. There is a contrast of both. Life is bittersweet. It has the effect of the sweetness, yet the bitterness is intertwined. There is the mixture of the good sweet with the bad bitter. This is what life is about. Periodically, we have good times in life in which we experience lasting, positive effects. These are uplifting and times we are encouraged. At other times, we experience bad periods in life, which give negative effects. They play a mental record in our minds.

Many of my sweet times in life were filled with happy memories. I can envision times in my childhood, adolescence and young adulthood during the holidays with the family. Christmas time was one of my favorite times of the year to celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ. Our family gathered at Christmas Eve and exchanged gifts. We shared many joyful and wonderful times.

Some of my fondest memories while growing up were with my favorite pets. They were more than pets to me. They were members of the family. There were happy times right before I married and in marriage for a while. The love of two pets then made me so happy. These were the sweet times of celebrating life and the times I thanked God for.

The bitter times seem to outweigh the sweet times. However, I tend to think there is a balance of both usually. The bitter times seem to have occurred all throughout my life. The experiences helped me grow, although they were full of hurt and pain. The experiences also led me to become stronger inside. It taught me many things that I contribute to learning life lessons.

They included the bitterness of a failed adoption, as well as the bitterness of going through a painful divorce. In addition, the bitterness of losing a long-term relationship after many years left me feeling empty and rejected. The time I lost my health a few years ago was devastating. These were the times that I wanted to forget happened. These were the times that drained me completely, especially emotionally and spiritually. Without them though, I wouldn’t have found myself nor would I have found a closer connection to God.

I have been through several storms in life. I was often discouraged and disappointed. This affected my relationships and interactions with others. I was angry for a while over circumstances. Many times, I had no control over the situations. The positive experiences I encountered helped me get through the negative experiences in life. I learned to accept the bad bitter times with the good sweet times. This has led me to help others, to inspire and to motivate others.

By writing this book, I hope to provide support in many areas for others. What is more important is to show that no one is alone in their journey of life. There are always others going through similar circumstances. By reaching out and connecting, many will be healed I feel. This is so true for all aspects emotionally, mentally and physically, as well as spiritually.

I must work the works of Him who sent me while it is day; the night is coming when no one can work. As long as I am in the world, I am the light of the world (John 9:4-5).

CHAPTER 1

The Honey Runs Deep

Teach me, Lord, the meaning of your laws, and I will obey them at all times (Psalms 119:33).

H ave you ever seen honey run down into a cup of hot tea? It takes forever as it moves so slowly from the container to the tea eagerly awaiting it. It runs deep into the cup as the thickness of the honey drips softly to the bottom of the cup. It takes it sweet time to pour to the bottom. The honey sticks to the bottom of the cup as it dissolves into the hot beverage. Slowly, it turns from a sweet layer of honey into the mixture of the tea. Wedged between it, is a slice of lemon. It adds a sour taste, yet adds flavor to the mixture of tea. The sweetness of the honey is mixed with the bitterness of the lemon. It gives a bittersweet effect as you drink the tea. This is how I perceived my life as bittersweet. There was sweetness, good times mixed with the bitterness, bad times. Isn’t that what life is all about, a mixture of good and bad?

There have been sweet and good times in my life. They were very exciting and thrilling times. These were the times to rejoice, be happy and thank God for. These were the times to reflect back on, to remember warm and fond memories from days past. These were the times to have fun with loved ones, family and friends. The times I treasured and will hold dear in my heart. Often, I wish I had these times back. They are in my own life experiences, the ones that kept me happy and smiling.

My parents were always good to me while I was growing up. I had been through a lot physically in my childhood and adolescence. There was more emotional pain in my teenage years. Probably more than most kids my age. I didn’t know at the time how those life experiences would make me stronger inside. I would find out later just how I used them to pull together my inner strength. It helped me through some rough times in life. It is a constant reminder that I am stronger than I thought originally. I just sometimes come through the back door so to speak instead of the front door.

Sweetness

One of my sweetest times was at Christmas. Throughout my childhood and adolescence, as well as adulthood, I envision the happy times with my family. This was one of my favorite seasons of the year. We would gather during Christmas Eve to exchange presents. Often, my eyes were bigger than my stomach. There was always too much food, especially assorted dishes of turkey, cranberry sauce and dressing. The desserts were wonderful too. I always saved room for ambrosia and pumpkin pie. Many times, I had played Santa, giving out gifts to family members. I was so happy and excited during these times.

Many sweet times occurred during my childhood, when I was so young and innocent. As a young child, there are no cares or worries. It was a time of purity, innocence and enjoying the world around me. When I was around 10 years old, I was somewhat of a tomboy. I loved playing in dirt, riding my bicycle and playing with matchbox cars with a neighborhood friend. Climbing dirt hills was something else I did at that time. One day, I played with a friend climbing a dirt hill next to my house. We would slide down the hill and laugh. When I went inside, I was so dirty that no one could tell who I was. It was all in my hair and my clothes looked like I had been in a sewer pipe all day. I was so happy and so proud of myself though. It took a long, hot bath and plenty of soap to get all the dirt off however.

Riding my bicycle was about the most fun. I would pedal up my street’s hill at the end of the road. I would then pedal down hill really fast spreading my arms like an eagle. Sometimes I put my feet up on the handles. It was dangerous of course but that is what made it so much fun. I had a neighborhood friend that had a number of matchbox cars. We made paths in the dirt in his backyard for the cars. My little sister came with me at times, although she was still a very young child at the time. I loved her though and we played together many hours in the day. We are still friends today. Ah, the very sweet times existed at one stage in my life!

I learned to climb trees then with a friend. My favorite tree to climb was a large pine tree at the edge of my backyard. My reminiscence at that age is that I would climb it as high as I could get to escape the real world. It was if I could look down and see everything going on around me. That was an awesome feeling – I was on top of the world. It may have been dangerous but I didn’t care. It was a sweet, refreshing time for me. I lost the vastness of the real world with the imagination of a 10-year old child.

Through my early childhood, I was raised with many animals growing up. I had several cats, a dog, goldfish, a turtle and a rabbit named Buddy that I remembered. I even had a parakeet bird before my 6th birthday. My favorite cat was named Smokey and my favorite dog was named Lady. They kept me happy as a child and I had many good memories with them. They lived several years. Both of them had died when I turned 14 years old.

As an adolescent, one of my favorite cats was named Charlie. He was so smart. He was a beautiful, seal-pointed Siamese cat with the deepest, blue eyes. He stayed with me in bed while recovering from ankle and knee surgery in 1972. He was killed that summer. It was a senseless act. Two teenage boys ran over him while he was watching water flow into a sewer drain. He had been fascinated by water ever since he was a kitten. I was 15 years old then, just before my 16th birthday.

In my young adulthood, another good and happy time was meeting my future husband. We were both so young then and had the world at our shoulders. I forgot how happy we were and so glad that we had met each other. We met at a Halloween party and fell in love. It was an accidental meeting when least expected. I have often heard that things happen when you least expect it.

This was a very sweet time for me. There was no pretense then. No one to say you screwed up in life. I was in my early twenties. At that age, I thought I