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    How to Play the Game?: Successful as a Woman in the Masculine World of Business! Learn the Rules of Men - and Then Make Your Own!
    How to Play the Game?: Successful as a Woman in the Masculine World of Business! Learn the Rules of Men - and Then Make Your Own!
    How to Play the Game?: Successful as a Woman in the Masculine World of Business! Learn the Rules of Men - and Then Make Your Own!
    Ebook146 pages1 hour

    How to Play the Game?: Successful as a Woman in the Masculine World of Business! Learn the Rules of Men - and Then Make Your Own!

    By Karsten Edelburg

    ()

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    About this ebook

    In todays business world, there unfortunately still is no harmony and fairness between the sexes. Female qualities such as better social skills, strong communication skills, flexibility and team spirit however are regarded as success factors for the future. So whats the answer to this dilemma?

    To achieve an equal partnership in the business world, women need to understand how men make and play by certain rules. Women should not, however, play by these male rules, but instead create their own rules, by which both sexes can play.

    This book shows women in leadership positions how to integrate their feminine skills into the masculine world of business. By using their feminine radar sensors women will enrich their departments or companies and lead them to success. Following their true nature of self-confidence and joy.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherAuthorHouse UK
    Release dateMay 14, 2013
    ISBN9781481792110
    How to Play the Game?: Successful as a Woman in the Masculine World of Business! Learn the Rules of Men - and Then Make Your Own!
    Author

    Karsten Edelburg

    Karsten Edelburg, Master of Business and Engineering (MBE), born in 1972. His international career includes working as a management adviser, in-house consultant consultant as well as trainer and manager in numerous corporations and medium-sized enterprises. During these various positions Karsten specialized in management principles and coaching methods. Today Karsten works as a business coach and primarily consults entrepreneurs on „top-down“ change management. The focus of his trainings is on leadership, communication and personal development. The strong impact of management style and working atmosphere on the scale of innovation an enterprise produces is a main focus point. In regards to collaboration of different gender colleagues and partners, Karsten encourages the participants to be true to their own nature with all its qualities and at the same time understand the nuances of the opposite sex in order to find that harmony we are all looking for.

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      Book preview

      How to Play the Game? - Karsten Edelburg

      © 2013 by Karsten Edelburg. All rights reserved.

      No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

      Published by AuthorHouse 05/03/2013

      ISBN: 978-1-4817-9210-3 (sc)

      ISBN: 978-1-4817-9211-0 (e)

      Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

      Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

      Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

      Contents

      Quote

      Dedication

      Preface

      Part 1

      1 The Man and the Mammoth

      2 Money rules the world of men

      3 Bringing joy to life and spending money joyfully represents the world of women

      4 Men play the game winners and losers

      5 Intimidator, seducer and controller

      6 How do men and women tick?

      7 Female Thinking—Male Thinking

      8 How do women and men talk to each other—and why?

      9 Twenty—sixty—twenty

      10 Tactics or diplomacy?

      11 The most important behavioral characteristics at a glance

      12 Women are welcome

      Part 2

      1 How to play the game?

      2 Praise—Recognition—Reward

      3 Men need sex to be successful

      4 Practice sex for your own pleasure

      5 Let the man be wild, but…

      6 The Man’s Game and The Woman’s Story

      7 Your attitude is reflected through your Aura

      Part 3

      1 Into the sadness, Out of the sadness

      2 The pyramid of needs according to Maslow

      3 The Open Heart (trust)

      4 Hatred and revenge

      5 What hurts women?

      6 Get frustrated oneself in order to frustrate the man

      7 Turn off the instinctive brain

      8 The Female Radar Sensors

      9 Think Consciously

      10 Being the Gas Station

      11 Sowing and Reaping

      12 The Tongue, the most important body part

      13 Women from the past and today

      14 Making a drama of it

      15 Discard those Machos

      Part 4

      1 Taking things personally

      2 I do the work and HE gets the recognition

      3 Wearing a Mask

      4 Create Rules

      5 How do I assert myself in the group?

      6 It is also a matter of Optics

      7 How do I apologize properly?

      8 Seeking Acknowledgment

      9 The Desire to Win

      10 Get what you want as a woman

      11 Women among Women

      12 Hey Women, don’t be…

      Part 5

      1 The Promotion Story

      2 The Salary Story

      3 The Dominance Story

      4 The Thousand Years Story

      5 The I-Get-What-I-Want-Story

      6 The I-Let-You-Suffer-Story

      Epilogue

      Acknowledgment

      List of References

      Quote

      If you want something to be heard in politics, ask a man. If you want something done, turn to a woman.

      Margaret Thatcher,

      former British politician and

      UK Prime Minister 1979-1990.

      Dedication

      To all women who want to make their own rules by which all play together in the world of business!

      Preface

      The communication and intellectual world of men and women are completely different. I realized this very early on. When I turned to my father as a young boy to find out and learn about something, he usually said: Ask your mother! I said: Oh no, I do not want to learn that much! It was at that time already clear to me that women know much more than men, and they talk differently. Their language is more emotional, more verbose and they go into more detail. They enjoy the art of communication.

      Later, in my professional life, I realized behind every great man is a great woman, be it the assistant, consultant, deputy department head, wife or even mother. I then thought: If there is a strong woman behind every successful man, why do they not do the job themselves? Why are they satisfied standing in the second row—with less respect, less power of influence, less money?

      I then worked as a management consultant in various companies and over time got to know many people in leading positions. The first thing I noticed was that, men frequently see their job as a game they want to win. They have fun doing it. The women, however, almost all fought in an all-consuming manner, and consequently any fun they may have had, simply disappeared. They suddenly and unexpectedly found themselves again on a battlefield. They attempted to adapt, but did not feel able to master the situation.

      So we have these knowledgeable, well-trained and qualified women and I wondered, what is the prime cause of the problem? Why do they think they have to fight?

      The differences in communication that I had felt as a young boy between my parents soon became apparent. I saw how women discredited themselves or wanted to be like men at all costs. They put on masks, behind which they did not feel comfortable, which restricted them and impeded their creativity.

      However, neither women nor the economy benefit if women behave like men, on the contrary, this will undervalue their capacities and abilities. I wrote my book with this in mind.

      I hope that you, dear reader, do not put on a mask, just be a woman and express your pleasure. Under this perspective I will provide ideas, show patterns of communication between men and women. I will explain the rules of men and help you to find your own, according to which both sexes can play together. No must be played together. But wait! This must does not mean that you should begin to dominate. It means you should apply your feminine skills in the masculine world of business and evolve your feminine radar sensors to enrich and quite naturally lead your department or your company to success—remaining self confident and motivated. This is the only way to create fairness between the sexes and a harmony, which we are all seeking.

      Karsten Edelburg

      Part 1

      The differences between men and women,

      the eye opener!

      1

      The Man and the Mammoth

      Have you ever felt lost in a meeting because your male colleagues dominated the discussion and you could not get a word in edgewise? Were you often frustrated when talking to your manager because you had the feeling he was not really listening to you? Did your business partner ever make a pass at you simply because he did not view you as the assistant, department head or company director but only as the attractive woman, the alleged sexual object? Is your bookshelf full of advisers, who want to get opposite sexes talking at cross-purposes finally back on track? Do you still seem to sigh and utter: I just don’t understand men!

      Knowing how the opposite sex tick, what is important to them and understanding where this strange looking behavior is coming from actually forms the basis of not being constantly misunderstood or even arguing at all. Let me start in the dark past, as I do not wish to give superficial advice, but wish to open your eyes to enable you to become successful in the masculine world of business.

      The man has developed in several phases over the course of evolution: At the very beginning we have the libido-man. He is perhaps two million years old and I call him that because Homo erectus followed first and foremost his sexual drive to spread his genes as far as possible and thus fertilizing many female partners. He focused on the hunt, and if he returned to the cave in the evening without a mammoth or any other shot animal, the women of the clan made it furiously clear that he was a miserable loser and was not welcome here if he could not make a contribution within the group.

      Then we have the emotional man. He developed fifty thousand years ago, when the Homo sapiens had long since emerged and people began making emotional bonds. This was also in order to protect their children from wild animals or armed tribes as they grew up in relaxed communities without the protection of men.

      Both male species, Homo erectus and Homo sapiens were condemned to protecting and providing. They hunted and produced. Of course we now know that women of the Stone Age began gathering roots and fruits as well as small animals and fish, thus contributing to supporting the family. However, the main provider was always the man.

      And there was something else. The women decided whom they wanted to get involved with. Men, who were well respected and talented, were popular. A man had a much better chance if he was a skillful hunter, a very fast runner or a brave warrior who defended his clan. This led to men competing for women (who were scarce in number according to the men). Why? A man could in purely arithmetical terms produce three thousand children with one thousand women. One woman however usually only gives birth to between ten and twenty children.

      The man: Protector—Provider—Producer. Born to die in battle. Understood? And then still constantly competing for the women! Do you see, dear reader, the pressure the male sex has always been exposed to and which he still has to withstand?

      Indeed, all

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