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    My Ramblings: Random Thoughts
    My Ramblings: Random Thoughts
    My Ramblings: Random Thoughts
    Ebook84 pages1 hour

    My Ramblings: Random Thoughts

    By Buddy Oxendine

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    About this ebook

    This book started as silly writings on Facebook that blossomed from there to what you see here. All my stories are made up and fictional but have some real characteristics, like people do drive, people do shop, etc. As you will see, they are written in the first person and I make myself the idiot, hero or whatever else one might call me. I referenced Starbucks simply because they are the most widely known coffee shop in the world. That story is also fictitious. My stories are not meant to be prejudicial toward any ethnic group. I have no desire to offend anyone. I wrote a silly story and people responded very positively and said they wanted more. After writing several stories I received responses about the possibility of compiling all my stories into a book. Of course, I laughed and thought that was silly, but the response was so overwhelming that I began to seriously consider it. A few close friends and family members suggested that I had nothing to lose, so I gave it serious thought. Finally, I was convinced, although grudgingly, to contact a publisher and see what happened. It is still silly to me, but if my friends on Facebook want it, I will make it available. The expense of making this book possible is small compared to the joy I hope it brings to my loyal readers. Enjoy the read and by all means, let me know what you think.
    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherAuthorHouse
    Release dateMar 5, 2014
    ISBN9781491870150
    My Ramblings: Random Thoughts
    Author

    Buddy Oxendine

    William, known by his friends as Buddy, has been writing for the fun of it for many years. Never having taken himself seriously, many of his writings found homes in the trash. Buddy is a member of the Lumbee Tribe of North Carolina and also a Viet Nam veteran. Buddy is a 65-year-old divorcee who loves having the freedom to write about whatever comes to his mind. He has faced many hardships and uses writing as an outlet for stress, tension, and pain. The “silly” stories are the outlet that has brought him more comfort because they help to make others smile when they may be facing hard time themselves. Buddy loves to write and there may be a more serious offering in the future. For now, he is in strange territory and is enjoying the trip. Keeping it fun and entertaining his friends is what is of most importance to him. The phrase, “What goes around, comes around,” should have a second part saying, “Send your very best.” If sending laughter and smiles to everyone results in bringing laughter and happiness to him, Buddy will ultimately be the happiest person around for many miles. Buddy believes that taking oneself too seriously has caused too many disappointments, too many arguments, and even too many suicides over the years.

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      Book preview

      My Ramblings - Buddy Oxendine

      © 2014 Buddy Oxendine. All rights reserved.

      No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

      Published by AuthorHouse 03/03/2014

      ISBN: 978-1-4918-7016-7 (sc)

      ISBN: 978-1-4918-7015-0 (e)

      Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

      and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

      Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

      Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

      Contents

      Dedication

      My New Shoes

      My Job at the Hospital

      The Poker/Pizza Night

      Dining Out

      Unwanted Gas Attack

      A walk in the Woods

      A Romantic Poem

      My Big Stomach

      Children: Our greatest source of humor

      Things Kids do and Say

      Deep Sea Fishing

      A Coded Message

      My Most Memorable Doctor’s Visit

      How to Give Directions

      My Children, again.

      The Waitress

      My Psychiatrist

      Military Life

      My Political Career

      Highway Robbery

      A Love Letter

      The Road Trip

      Examples of

      My Amazing Life

      The New Alarm Clock

      Explaining the unexplainable that has never been explained

      The Blind Truth

      The Proper use of Words

      Fond Family Memories

      Memories from my childhood

      Wonderful Memories from my Family

      A Poem about you (or whoever)

      Small Irritations

      Coffee Time

      The Blind Date

      You, through my eyes

      About The Author

      Dedication

      I dedicate this writing to my dad; James A. Oxendine who was one of the most jovial and friendly people I ever had the pleasure of knowing. My dad taught school and was a licensed barber. His part-time job was the one that afforded him the opportunity to talk so much and relay stories from his past. My dad could tell a story, true or not, and make people hang on every word. His sense of humor was second to none and we could not help but laugh at his antics. For example, out of nowhere he would tell one of his kids to stand up. When we did, he would say, While you are up, go bring me a glass of water. We, his children, never knew what would come out of his mouth from moment to moment. The one thing we always knew though was that he loved us so very much. His positive attitude and humor kept us close as a family and we have all been guilty of pulling some of his pranks on others. I keep him alive and well with some of my silly ways that make others smile. That is all I want; to make others smile in a harsh and cruel world. This writing is designed for that purpose alone. My dad would be proud to know that I have kept his silly ways alive and well. Although he passed away more than 20 years ago, people still talk about his ability to tell stories that made you hate to see end. I am almost as old now as he was when he died, but I will never have the respect of others or admiration that he commanded. He was one of a kind, and I was the lucky one who could call him daddy.

      My New Shoes

      I woke up this morning and decided that I would buy myself a new pair of shoes. After prying my socks off the floor, I put my old shoes on and headed for town. At the shoe store I found a very eager salesperson who insisted on making my visit a great experience. He motioned me toward a very comfortable looking chair and told me to just relax. I showed him the pair I wanted and he knelt before me and began to take my old shoes off. I heard him gasp and I knew he liked my choice of shoes too. He put his hand over his mouth to hide his excitement. He was speechless and I could see the tears in his eyes. I knew he was envious that I had beat him to that pair of shoes. He excused himself and went over to talk with another employee. He was still holding his hand over his mouth so I could not hear him bragging on my new shoes. The other employee came over and stopped a few feet away and said, oh Jesus Christ as he turned abruptly back to the first one. I knew then that I had made a great choice. They were both envious of my new shoes. That was such a great experience that I must go back.

      Hello fb friends. Those of you who know me, know that I don’t gamble. Those of you who do not know me, just ask one of those who do know me. Those of you who know me will tell those of you who do not know me that I do not gamble. That does not mean that I won’t play poker. I just won’t play poker for money. A few of my acquaintances feel the same way about not playing for money. W arranged a night when all of us except the ones who said no, could meet and have some fun playing poker, but not for money. If you have been reading about the things I have been posting, you know about my new shoes. I decided to wear them since everyone liked them so much. Baldy, who had this beautiful head of hair and wore it back in a ponytail, was to my right. Shorty had to sit back from the table because of his long legs. We talked and had a great time. It was noisy, but it was also a controlled noise; laughter, jokes, the usual things that a group of men talk about. After about 30 minute, I slid my shoes off and made my feet comfortable. Suddenly, it got real quiet in the room. Baldy was wiping his eyes; Shorty slid back further from the table and coughed a couple of times. He also began to cough and gag. I thought to myself that these guys are passing signals to each other. The other 2

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