For the Joy

For the Joy

Becky Kidd

Copyright © 2014 Rebecca Kidd.

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Scripture taken from the Holy Bible, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright © 1973, 1978, 1984 by Biblica, Inc. All rights reserved worldwide. Used by permission. NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION® and NIV® are registered trademarks of Biblica, Inc. Use of either trademark for the offering of goods or services requires the prior written consent of Biblica US, Inc.

WestBow Press

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Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

ISBN: 978-1-4908-4349-0 (e)

WestBow Press rev. date: 9/15/2014

CONTENTS

~THE JOURNEY~

~ANTICIPATION~

~HIS BOUNTEOUS LOVE~

~Moth to the Flame. Seek Me as a Moth to the Flame.~

~THE BOOK: EXAMEN~

~SEATED WITH CHRIST~

~Blessed are the pure in heart~

~HIS KNEES~

~THE HEALER OF OUR WOUNDED SOULS~

~THE BRAMBLE~

~FEAR~

~WORRY~

~SORROW~

~HOPELESSNESS~

~RECONCILIATION~

~TWO BOXES~

~All is Choices child.~

WHAT ARE YOU BEHOLDING?

~COMING TO FREEDOM~

~Piercing of the heart ~ Glimpses~

~THE DISSOLVING~

~FIX IT~

~THE LIFE OF THE VINE~

~Robes of Righteousness~

~TABERNACLE~

~BEING STILL~

~BURNING HEARTS~

~COOL OF THE EVENING~

~THE OIL OF GLADNESS~

~Breathing… Going Deeper~

~HIS GLORY~

~TRIUMPHAL ENTRY~

~A SERVANT’S HEART… HIS PASSION…~

~HIDDEN MANNA~

~Dad’s Passing~

~JOY CHILD~

~SPHERE OF LOVE~

~IT IS FINISHED~

"For the Joy Set before Me…

I Became your

Portion.

Am I not

Enough

for you?"

His Words to me

Becky Kidd

Usually unorthodox, sometimes outlandish, surprisingly wild, He Speaks to me. Yet He Uses common things in life, everyday things, in such a new and different Way of seeing to Draw me to Him, and Show to me His Truths. So yes, I will say that the Truths He is Teaching me are no different from any in His Holy Word. But His Methods to open the eyes of my heart to see more deeply with Him can be… a bit unconventional! What a wild ride! Thank you for your kindness and patience as you read this my journaling of some of what God has Given to me. I must say that sometimes He Speaks in fragments, run on sentences, and He occasionally Uses words for which I cannot find correct spelling. Scattered throughout are pictures I have taken, some connected with the pieces God has Given to me, and some of places conducive to quiet reflection.

For a number of years now, God through His Holy Spirit, has been Giving to me His Words. These Words are not anything that cannot be found in His Word, The Holy Bible. He is, through what He Speaks to me, making a clarity for me. This is truly helping me to take in to my mind, heart and soul ~ His Heart. Through His Holy Spirit He also Gives to me Pictures in my mind’s eye. I can only describe these like this: it is as if you were recently with a friend or loved one, and the two of you parted company. Thinking back on your time together, you could remember what the other person looked like ~ the expressions of the face, the clothing, the tone of the voice, and the tone of your meeting. It is like a memory ~ in your mind’s eye ~ these Pictures He Gives to me ~ yet not memories ~ but insights, and a deeper, clearer understanding of Himself.

Always as He Shows me myself with Him, I look to be about two years old, which is I am sure, one of the most rebellious times of physical life. But even in my rebellions and all my stumbling, He is so Sweet, Kind, and Desiring that which is Best for my soul.

As He has Given these Insights to me, I realize that these are His Words of Love and Encouragement not only to me, but also to all of His little ones who are…longing for His Appearing… Based on 2Timothy 4:8

In Christ Jesus,

Becky Kidd

As I dedicate my journal, I am mindful of certain colors that God has Shown me significant. Red: I dedicate this journal to my Heavenly Father, Lord God, Adonai, Maker of Heaven and earth, Creator of all people. To my Lord and Savior Jesus Christ, without Whose Amazing Sacrifice on The Cross, Shedding His Precious Blood for me ~ I would be forever lost. To The Holy Spirit of God Whose Dear Love, Gentle Whispers and Holy Fire Content and Guide my heart.

Purple: signifying His Royal Adoption of me, and all who call Him Lord of their lives, and our willing agreement, acceptance of this Adoption. To my parents who raised me in a home of Love. To my father, who loved and adored my mother and all of his daughters. To my mother, whose walk with Christ Jesus has been a beautiful picture to me of strong faith in the midst of adversity… and joy. To Reverend Kathy Lincks Jorgensen, who led me to Christ Jesus when I was a teenager, and whose life has been a sweet example of surrender to Him. To my sisters and their families, whose lives have impacted me in profound ways. Especially to my Patty who continues to, in her walk with Christ, be my accountability partner, my prayer partner, and my vigilant encourager; thank you dear one for helping me read and reread this tome. To my mother in law who has been so kind to me, and always lovingly prays for us. To my sweet son in law Stuart, whose faithfulness and determination mean so very much to me. To my dearest Ashley, who from the first nanosecond of her life, showed to me in the sparkles of her beautiful eyes, what unconditional sacrificial love is all about. To my precious husband Don, who has loved, encouraged, and been inordinately patient with me. He has challenged me to broaden my horizons in many directions ~ especially on the tiny seat of a fast bicycle! God surely Answered my prayer thirty seven years ago by Sending to me the most perfect husband.

Black: signifying a deep mourning over my sins, and a deep sorrow for every person who does not have a relationship with Christ Jesus. Yes, God’s Word is Living and continues to astound me with its great depth of meaning. Here I thank so many mentors to me in my walk of faith. I especially thank Mrs. Lona Bailey for encouraging me as a young mother to keep a journal of what God is doing in your life. This she said would be a wonderful way of looking back during hard times, to see how Faithful God has been. Truly, I thought I would have… not much to write. I also thank Bishop and Mrs. B. Michael Watson who offered Disciple Bible Study in their lovely home, and started me on this lifetime pursuit of God’s Word. I thank dear Reverend Clyde Pressley for all the countless hours of Bible Study he has so diligently and patiently given to so many hungry disciples of Christ Jesus. Clyde has truly fed Christ’s sheep. I thank our ministers Dr. Jeff and Reverend Robin Wilson who continue to carry the torch of teaching. I am so very grateful to Mrs. Dottie McGehee and Reverend Kathy Lincks Jorgensen for faithfully continuing to stretch and grow my understanding of God’s Word. Through their commitments to teach new ways of understanding and application of what I have learned in God’s Word, they are instrumental in keeping me and many other disciples of Christ on His Path of Love. I thank Father Marshall Craver and Dr. Bob Donnell for bringing the Personal Spiritual Deepening Program to Mobile from The Shalem Institute for Spiritual Formation, Washington, D.C. This continuing gathering of seeking Christians at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church, has been delightful, and persistently points me to the Heart of Christ. I thank Pastor Jeremy Mount whose deep faith and precious walk with Christ is reaching hundreds of thirsting souls each Sunday, in the most amazing ways at The Flora~Bama Bar on the beach at Perdido Key. God’s Holy Spirit is clearly present here. To all of my girls in every Bible study we have done together, for all of your wonderful fellowship, and sweet encouragement, I cannot thank you enough.

Finally, Yellow, His Light. Yellow represents The Great Fire in Christ’s Heart ~ His Great Zeal. Here I will say, to every circumstance of my life, joy filled and sorrow filled, which has drawn me ever closer to The Heart of Christ Jesus.

I want to give a very special word of thanks to my husband Don for so much help financially, and encouraging me during this endeavor, and to Mr. Bob Fleck, and Mrs. Sharon Rogers for all your technical help. Without you three, I could not have taken this book to completion.

I pray that God will Pour out His Blessings upon each one who reads this journal of His Words Given to me.

Becky Kidd

~ THE JOURNEY ~

It is believing, yes child. It is the initial belief in Me by a little one ~ of course so. But this word believe is much deeper, much richer. Here We Speak of the deep desire to follow Me… Forever. Here We Speak of the Journey of your whole life in Me and with Me. We Speak of Union child. One Forever in Agreement. It is for this Joy that I came to Save the human soul. Given to me: 9/15/2013, reading John 3:16 For God so Loved…"

And it is during this Journey child, this walking there in that place ~ if you will but glance at Me ~I AM Longing to Hold your hand in Mine and Guide you through the pitfalls of life there ~ certainly this is so. But it is the Longing of My Heart that every empty ~every wounded ~every forlorn ~place in your soul would allow My Spirit’s Sweet Balm to Heal, to Fill, to Comfort. Look to Me The Living Word. Look to Me The Light of the world. I AM your True Direction, your True Solace in this Our Journey Together. Given to me: 1/ 11/ 2010 Companions In Christ

Oh Father, I wish my little camera could capture this! That sliver of a moon… so tiny… yet casting an amazing light on the Gulf of Mexico. How beautiful, and then lightning, far out… on the horizon.

You see child: the bright lightning yes, lighting up the whole large area of the sky. And for a moment a spectacular show it provides. But look again to My moon. This stage of the moon is her waxing. She is building strength, but still you see only a small part of her, do you not? Yet even in this stage, the moon is providing much light, a steady constant beacon. Look… how great a light this tiny sliver is reflecting upon the dark Gulf waters; and see how brightly this small ellipse lights the night sky. Yes, child. Be My moon, My reflection in the dark world. Here I Speak of a constant~ness, and not a momentary flash. Here I Speak of a sure, dependable long term reflection of My Ways, My Heart. Here I Speak of a wonder ~ filled, never ending walk with Me, there in that place yes, but also Here with Me in Eternity. This no sprint child, but a wonderful long exhilarating walk, to be savored, enjoyed. Given to me: 9/30/2011 at 8:15 p.m.

Yes child, I AM in Remembrance of all the Promises I Have Made to you. Yes, I Promise to never leave you or forsake you. But even beyond that Promise I Would Have you Know this: I Delight in you My little one. I Promise to Never tire of your soul’s glance in My Direction ~ your look to Me ~ My Delight… My Joy. Given: 6/25/2011 Riding my bike with Don early a.m., Orange Beach

Oh Heavenly Father, I am so insignificant in this life… so common… yet You Speak to me?! Lord Christ… You amaze me.

Seek Me child just as the tiny common moth seeks the flame.

As I watch Your Beautiful Show tonight Lord Christ… a Glorious indescribable sunset… I am again so struck with my insignificance and total dependence on You. I am nothing Lord… truly dust, in every way… dust. And You Begin:

What is dust child? A substance ~ lighter than dirt. A substance you desire to rid your house of… a substance that is constant worldwide. Yes it is common. Yes from dust you came… to dust you will return.

Ash Wednesday Lord.

Yes child. Those are the words spoken upon that special Holy day. But let Us Look. Yes My little one you are common, of no great report. Yes a house wife . . . and getting older… becoming by the world’s standards ~ less attractive, and living there in Alabama… where is that anyway? Insignificant old dust living in an insignificant place… a minuscule speck on the planet earth… Oh child each person on the face of that earth could say the same. This is what you see when you look at yourself. But as I Look… as I Look at you and each one I Made… My Heart Leaps for Joy at the very Thought of you. Do you not see how My Heart Joys over all… each child of Mine? No! Not one insignificant to Me! And little one… the longer We Walk Together… the more Beautiful you become to Me. Never ever forget this. 8/ 14/11

Joy in the Journey child. Oh how I Would that you Joy in this time on earth with Me! Yes even in your deepest sorrow seek My Eyes, My Heart, and My Loving Arms you find Embracing your little soul. Is this not Enough reason for My Joy to Flood your heart, your soul? Yes: In Me KNOW a Certain Joy that nothing on earth can ~ is able to~ give your soul, your longing heart. Joy in small pleasures. Joy in watching Huntly run the fields in pursuit of his tennis ball. Joy in the unfolding of the rosebud. Joy in KNOWING My Heart, My Great Desire and Love for you. Joy in every heartbeat. Joy in every breath. Joy in every day which takes you one step closer to Eternity Here with Me. Joy in all the life I Have Put before your eyes, your feet, your hands, your heart. Joy yes in Our Journey together! Given to me:1/15/13

The Preciousness of the moment child. Neither of Us Wants to miss the Preciousness of the moment that is right now. The Preciousness of each breath, each heartbeat, each embrace, each kiss, each twinkle of the eye. Yes child Presence in the Preciousness of this moment. Opening your eyes, the eyes of your soul, and your physical eyes ~ to My Love, My Joy, in sweet surrender to Me… here is where True Satiation of all longings of your heart and soul are found… being totally surrendered your will to Mine, your heart to My Heart. Oh how I Love you My little one. Oh how I Love you. Given to me: 8/24/2010

Come and rest now weary little traveler.

This I heard You Speak to me as we sat down in the beautiful San Luigi dei Francesi church in Rome, Italy. We had gone there to see Caravaggio’s Inspiration of Saint Matthew in the Contarelli Chapel. Tired after a very full day of being tourists in Rome, we gazed at the beautiful altar. Looking back on this trip to Italy with My sweet husband, and the previous trip with our dear daughter, I am intrigued by the way God allowed me to be not only a tourist but also a pilgrim. Amazingly, the places of pilgrimage were so many off our tourist route and unknown to me… but Given by God to so powerfully touch my heart. The Mamertine prison was scheduled; but in May 2005, the first I had ever heard of this prison, God Gave to me a most wonderful Gift. After our tour, there was no one else coming into the dank dugeon like place where both Saint Peter and Saint Paul were held, at separate times. I asked our guide if I might spend a few moments there and he agreed. So I was able to just be alone in that cell for a while. This touched my heart beyond words. Thinking about what Saint Peter and Saint Paul endured there overwhelmed me. What a sweet Gift God Gave allowing me time there alone in that awful place, to thank Him for those two men whose faith and perseverance have touched my heart so many years hence.

Pilgrim… and child that same trip an unscheduled stop enabled you to view The Ecstasy of St. Theresa. Pilgrim again. And how much this has meant to you and your following of My Heart. And again My Gift to you… The Holy Stairs at San Giovanni In Laterrano. An unexpected and unknown to you, place to remember Me. And oh child My Francis’ little church in the valley. What a Precious Place this was for Me. Yes child pilgrim again. How this little place touched your heart. Places obscure to you but Precious to Me. Yes child many pilgrims coming to seek Me, more than tourists on holiday. And even so you were an accidental pilgrim ~ but My Gifts I Provided. What a picture this is to Me of your journey with Me through life there. As you journey… more than just a tourist, I AM is Asking you to be always a pilgrim… in search of My Eyes, My Heart, and True Riches will be found by your seeking soul and spirit. Given: 11/11/ 2012

When you come bring the cloak I left with Carpas at Troas, and my scrolls, especially the parchments. Do your best to get here before winter. The Lord be with your spirit. Grace be with you. 2Timothy 4:13, 21,22 Saint Paul’s final words written to Timothy from The Mamertine Prison, Rome, Italy

Let us fix our eyes

on Jesus,

the author and perfecter

of our faith,

who

for the joy set before him

endured the cross,

scorning its shame,

and sat down at the right hand

of the throne of

God.

Hebrews 12:2

You are My Joy child.

No way Lord, me? I cannot imagine it.

Yes child. Every little one who calls Me Abba brings to My Heart such Joy.

But Lord Christ, Holy Spirit, I just continually keep making mistakes… so many times… stumbling along… making a mess of things. How in the world can I bring You anything but trouble and Heartache? And I see You Smile and then Laugh.

Oh child! It is the Love you give to Me that I Speak of here. This Joys My Heart so! As you give to Me your heart each morning… as you make that Choice to seek Me… My Eyes, My Heart… this Pleases Me and truly Gives to Me Joy. Think child of your precious daughter. What true Joy she brings to you… in just her presence with you… her caring about you. How it touches your heart that she desires your company. And so with Me. As any of My little ones call My Name… yes of course so… but even the slightest glance towards My Face… Joy Unbounded for My Heart. Yes My dear little one. Joy! Given to me: 9/ 7/2011

And what has Our Journey been thus far? Sometimes, seasons of arduous climbing the steep narrow rock ~ filled path, where yes you are only able to hold onto My Hands, and put one foot exactly in front of the other. And yes the total focus of your eyes into Mine, yes so it must be for you in order not to go careening over the side of the high sheer mountain into oblivion. Yet as you endure these times of testing… so much stronger does your adoration of My Heart become. You see this do you not child? Yes Lord God.

Also let Us Look at seasons of Rest… Sabbath with Me. For without this soul’s Rest, in Me, the Call I Give to you for each day’s Journey with Me, is impossible. Each day child Our Sabbath time so crucial to whatever a day is bringing. Yes My Cleansing. And yes My Most Precious Gift to you… The Filling of your little spirit with My Own. Oh yes child during Our Sabbath time each morning, sweet surrender. Surrender on your part of anything that would be a barrier to Oneness of little soul and spirit to Mine… as We Watch that dross being burned… and cast into the pit… purity of heart and a fresh day’s walk with Me. Yes child for only in purity am I Able to truly Work in you. And as you watch the rose buds open into the glory I Made them to be… all I Made them to become… so your Journey with Me throughout this life. Whether arduous climbing or Resting in My Arms of Love, throughout your entire existence I AM… and The Great Lover of your little soul and spirit. You, and every little one who calls Me Lord and King of their heart, are My Glory… My Reflection. Shine for Me child in this Our Journey Together. Given to me: 1/13/ 2013,12:00p.m.

I am the light of the world… John 8:12

Christmas is coming child. My Birth into that world. This child is why I was Born". Remember. Isaiah 52:13~53:12