The Eldritch Wives of Transylvania Book 3

Copyright by Albert Benson 2015

This book is a work of fiction. Characters, names, organisations, businesses, places and events are the sum of the author’s weird imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living, dead, undead, half dead, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

And I would like to pay homage to Greek and Viking myths and legends, Marvel and DC comic superheroes, and to all the science fiction and fantasy writers, both past and present, that have enriched our lives with their fabulous stories.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic (internet) or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author.

Thank you, hope you enjoy the story.

The

Eldritch

Wives

Transylvania 3

Heimdallr stood strong and with resolve, his thin lips pressed firmly together, giving him a stern and forbidding countenance. Both hands holding his great golden sword, Hofud, as tall as him at seven feet, and the blade as wide as a normal man’s chest. He knew what was coming, behind him stood the imposing figure of Odin, as tall as Heimdallr, but twice as wide. Odin was holding the magical spear Gungnir across his ample chest, and behind him four hundred of Asgard’s finest warriors, in a long column of four, The Odin Guard.

Suddenly the Bifrost began sparking like multi-coloured Christmas lights were dancing along its length.

First to appear out of the swirling void was the eight-foot-tall, impossibly handsome, Thor, his enormous muscles and veins standing out as if carved from the finest marble by Michelangelo, his dark blue leather armour shining brightly, as if just polished; he marched forward and raised Mjollnir in salute.

All hail Odin, the All-Father, he shouted, his voice akin to thunder, making the building slightly vibrate.

The Odin Guard, as one, raised their swords and shouted,

All hail Odin, the All-Father.

Although, not as loud as Thor.

Next to appear were the seven feet tall Lady Sif, Lokki, Vidar, Freyr, Baldr and Hermoor. They stopped and raised their weapons in salute.

All hail Odin, the All-Father.

Heimdallr allowed them to walk past.

Next to appear were the Ladies of Transylvania (minus Grinfreda, who was heading towards Russia, and Arianwen, who was off somewhere shagging Shit. For those of you what that last sentence was all about, and haven’t read book 2, Shit is a superhero who can run as fast as the Flash, Quicksilver, etc. but couldn’t use any of those names because they’re all under copyright. He chose Shit because whenever he ran past someone they would exclaim, Shit, what was that?). The Wytches, including The Principal, Doctor EErye, Anastasia, Cassandra, Bathsheba and Ophelia. Behind them the hybrids Lucy and Mina, followed by Alucard and Luigi, holding hands, then Abigail and Muffy, followed by Glade, Spar and Lois, and finally, the twelve feet tall, blue skinned figure of the HUNK, still wearing the same latex, really tight, white underpants.

With his right hand Heimdallr lifted Hofud into a defensive stance and held out his left hand. Halt, the All-Father has decreed none of you can enter the Eternal Realm of Asgard. I will be sending you all back to Midgard.

Ethelburga slinked forward and stroked Heimdallr’s left hand. Hello big boy, like your – big - weapon. Can’t we stay here for a while, and get to know one another - better?

Back ex-vampyre, I am married to Völuspá.

Mick Fury, alias the giant, blue skinned HUNK, could hear a woman’s voice, very faint, calling for help. He looked around, wondering if anyone else could hear it, but they all seemed oblivious. The woman’s voice became more persistent, practically begging to be rescued. He honed his senses into the whereabouts of the voice, managed to locate the direction, and without warning, ran forward, jumped over Heimdallr, Odin, and his Odin Guard, landed on the Bifrost and ran towards the city, then jumped into the air, travelling at least 5 miles towards the centre of Asgard.

This took everyone by surprise, but it was The Odin Guard that moved the quickest, they split into two, one half racing to their light ships and chasing after the blue skinned, white latex underpants wearing HUNK. Which were really tight, in fact, very revealing. The other half of The Odin Guard remaining behind Odin.

Asgard’s inner defences instantly went on red alert, suddenly hundreds of plasma guns shot up out of the tops of futuristic, but Asgardian buildings, and began firing at the blue skinned HUNK. Many blasts hit the HUNK, but it had little effect upon his super toughened blue skin, in fact it hardly made him veer off course. He landed in front of a massive black, wrought iron gate; in front of the gate were the keepers, Asgardian warriors, ready to defend, with their lives, the gate.

The warriors were big, broad and fully armoured, their Asgardian steel burnished to a high polish, their helmets were smooth and round with no horns whatsoever, their highly decorated shields, with Asgardian symbols, were large and could interlock with their neighbours, their Asgardian steel swords were held resting on top of their shields ready to attack. Each warrior looked more than capable. Behind them a captain shouted an order, four from the centre line marched confidently forward to engage the giant, blue skinned, really tight, in fact, very revealing, white latex underpants wearing HUNK.

The four warriors began separating and spreading, but also moving forward.

The HUNK watched their every move, wondering how to get past them and the large black iron-gate.

Suddenly, without warning, the four warriors attacked, two keeping their swords in place on the top of their shields, but the other two swinging their swords to hack the HUNK’s head off.

In response the HUNK kicked one shield sending the warrior flying back a hundred feet to thud against the battlement’s walls.

THUNK.

The second warrior was quick and had his sword swinging over his head towards the HUNK’s neck.

CLANGGG.

The sword bounced off the HUNK’s neck, leaving not a mark.

The HUNK reacted quickly by punching the shield, CLUNNNNG, and sending the warrior back to bounce of the battlement walls, THUUUD.

The commander at the back shouted an order, and all the warriors attacked the HUNK.

And then it was THUNK - KAPOW – CLANGGG – KAPOW – CLUNNNNG – KAPOW - THUUUD.

Back at the Bifrost Heimdallr had his giant sword, Hofud, ready to smite the enemies of Odin.

Odin turned back to the Freedom Fighters, his fabled and all-powerful spear, Gungnir, pointed, ready to blast them to smithereens, behind him, the rest of The Odin Guard were also ready to smite upon Odin’s word.

The Principal stepped forward, his hands held tightly by his side, he stopped and went on to one knee and bowed his head before Odin. After some moments he raised his head, stood and spoke to Odin. All Father Odin, your Majesty, please forgive our intrusion, but it was your son, Thor, who brought us here and saved our lives, for which we are all exceedingly grateful. Please believe us when I say we have no intention of doing any harm to Asgard. The blue skinned one is not with us; somehow he was caught in the Bifrost. I am a Wytch, behind me are…

I know who you are, Odin spoke, his voice gruff and gravely with annoyance. I know who all of you are. You are not welcome in Asgard. We have had dealings with all your races and it has not ended well. I am sending you back.

Please Odin, Anastasia spoke stepping forward, if you send us back to Midgard, you are sentencing us to death. Transylvania is a nuclear wasteland.

Odin raised his head and looked down at her with his one good eye, The missiles were false, there were no nuclear warheads inside them. It was a deception. All of you turn and Heimdallr will send you back to Midgard.

Thor stepped before his father and spoke quietly, for him that is, All Father, may I petition you?

Odin placed his hands on Thor’s broad and muscular shoulders. My son, I am always ready to listen to you, speak.

My Father, you have always had Asgard’s safety as your priority, and I agree with you they must be sent back to Midgard, but the blue skinned Frondee is a problem. It is really a human that has been injected with genetically modified Frondee blood, its individual strength far exceeds our own. It would be a mistake for our warriors to engage it in battle; too many lives would be lost, far better to use the Freedom Fighters to contain it. They know it far better than we do. We should let them control it and take it back to Midgard. But if they should fail…

Odin held up his hand to silence Thor. He stroked his chin and looked at all around him. My son, he looked at his other sons, all my Sons, there was never a father prouder than I when I look at you and see the future of Asgard. Baldr, my son, my heart is filled with gladness that you are back with us, accept my apologies, I have wronged you and for that I am sorry. Come give your father a hug.

They hug, slapping one another’s back, then separate. Odin looks at them and speaks, There is something I must tell you, in our dungeons we hold a female Frondee. She was the leader of an infiltration group that broke into our vaults to steal the Eternity Shoe of Destiny. You all know the power the Shoe contains. If it fits onto the wrong foot before midnight the whole universe is in peril. We managed to overpower and kill the group, but not without a terrible price, only the female Frondee survived. The blue skinned giant, and I don’t know how, must have heard her cries. That is where he has gone. Our main problem is his strength is unparalleled, our instruments cannot measure his power.

Don’t worry Father, said Thor, if this group cannot control it, I will battle and defeat this blue skinned hybrid Frondee.

As will I Father, said Baldr.

And I Father, added Freyr.

And I Father, said Vidar.

They looked towards Lokki, who raised his eyebrows and held up his hands in surprise. Of course, it goes without saying, the Frondee hybrid is already defeated.

Odin gave Lokki a critical gaze, but continued, My sons, I have never been so proud of you all. We cannot risk the safety of the other Midgardians, they will be sent back to Midgard.

Sapphira whispered to Theodosia, I’m not going back to Earth, it’s much more interesting here.

Theodosia answered, I agree, some of those warriors look really tasty.

Vanora whispered, How long, do you suppose, would it take to remove all that armour?

I don’t know, answered Ethelburga, but I’m dying to find out.

I’ve got an idea, said Cordelia, stepping forward. All-Father Odin, Your Majesty, my sisters and I have some special abilities, we are strong, we can fly, it takes a lot to hurt us, and we work as a team. Please allow us to contain the hybrid Frondee and send him back to Midgard.

Odin gave her the beady one-eyed stare. And if you ladies succeed what do you want in return?

Cordelia smiled, We would like to spend some time in your beautiful kingdom. A holiday, vacation, for say, two years?

Would that be two Midgard years?

Yes your Majesty, Cordelia answered, and all the ladies nodded in agreement.

The Asgardian year is twice as long as Midgard’s, therefore two Midgard years would only equate to one Asgardian year. But I find your proposal acceptable only if you contain the hybrid Frondee. Odin waved his hand towards the others. These cannot remain on Asgard they must go back immediately. That is my decision.

And it is a good decision your Majesty. Do you know where the hybrid has gone?

Probably to our dungeons to rescue the Frondee. Forty of my Odin Guard will show you the way. But be warned do not deviate from the path.

We will not deviate your Majesty but there’s no need to show us the way just pointed in the right direction. Cordelia answered, opening her arms and allowing her wings to come out.

TWANG.

All the ladies followed her lead and opened their wings.

TWANG – TWANG – TWANG, ET CETERA.

To say Odin, Heimdallr, and the Odin Guard were surprised was an understatement as before them stood eighteen beautiful women with leathery, bat-like wings. Odin could only point towards the centre of Asgard as Cordelia ran forward and took off followed by seventeen nearly invincible ex-vampires.

One of the Odin guard whispered to the guard on his right, That would be a little awkward if those wings came out in the sack.

Yeah, I wonder what they feel like?

They look soft.

A bit weird though, I have never made love to a woman with wings.

Really? I once made love to a Crosofti.

When?

When that army of mercenaries invaded Nidavellir.

What, the Crosofti were with the mercenaries?

I know, but she offered me a deal for her release.

So that was why you went missing for that hour?

Yeah, during one point her wings came out and lifted the both of us up. I…

SHUT UP THAT GUARD THERE, LOOK TO YOUR FRONT, shouted the Warrior at Arms, who was the equivalent of a sergeant major.

At the dungeons the HUNK stood in front of the massive Asgardian steel bars, around him lay the prone bodies of defeated Asgardians. He was looking at the most fabulous creature he’d ever seen. She was tall at least ten feet, her skin a sky blue, her hair a lighter blue, seemingly to glow in the shadows of the dark cell. They stared at one another, she trying to make out what he was, he entranced by her beauty, her physicality, her presence. She took a step back, he took a step forward, grasping the bars in both hands, and pressing his face to the thick bars. She took another step back, but the back wall of the dungeon halted her retreat.

You’re not Frondee.

No, I’m human.

What happened to you?

I was injected with genetically modified Frondee blood. But I only change when I’m sexually excited.

And are you sexually excited now?

I seem to be sexually excited all the time.

Yes, wow, I can see.

He began squeezing the metal bars, and they yielded like putty beneath his massive fingers.

Stay back.

I have no intention of harming you. I just want information. I want to be cured. I don’t want to be this HUNK anymore.

Cautiously she moved towards the bars but kept out of his reach. I can help you with that.

How?

You help me escape and I will take you back to Frondee, we have scientists that can reverse your conversion. Then you will become human again, and we will return you to your planet.

Yes, I will do that, but how will we leave this place?

I led a diplomatic team of Frondees to Asgard to claim back what was rightfully ours, The Eternity Shoe of Destiny. Odin refused to give it back to us, he betrayed us, he tricked us, he killed my team, and imprisoned me here. For a century he has kept me prisoner. He had refused to meet any Frondee representatives. We are a peaceful race, we do not seek confrontation, we do not seek war, we want only peace. The Asgardians still have our ship, but I don’t know where it is.

I will find it. He went to turn away.

Wait, you have to release me, reinforcements will be coming soon.

He turned back to the bars, gripped them with both hands and yanked.

SCREEECH-THONNNG.

A large section of the bars came away in his hands, bringing with it bits of stone and mortar. He threw the section onto the floor.

CLANNNNG.

The female Frondee stepped forward and stood before the HUNK. With both hands she reached up and caressed his cheeks, leaned ahead forward and gently kissed his lips. It was like a thunderclap between them, electricity flowed between the lips, sexual desire overtook him, he wanted this woman more than he’d ever wanted any woman before. Gently, but firmly, she pushed him back, he was reluctant, and she had to use all her strength, but eventually he became passive.

Later, later, we do not have time for this, the Asgardians will be coming. We must find my ship and escape; will you help me?

The HUNK could only nod, when he was so excited he lost his voice.

My name is Ospell. What is your name?

I can’t remember my human name, but they call me the Hunk.

Good. But first we must find what I came here for in the first place, The Eternity Shoe of Destiny. Help me find it please.

He could only nod.

She grabbed hold of his arm and pulled him to her left, and they ran down the corridor.

Meanwhile back on Earth two of the scientists that first injected the Frondee blood into Mick Fury were alternatively looking at their computer screen checking the results, and a big white rat, on its back, in a glass tank, with sawdust on the bottom.

I can’t believe it, exclaimed Doctor Fudweiser.

No, it’s fantastic, agreed Doctor Fudweiser.

It’s grown four new legs, said Doctor Fudweiser.

(I should mention the Doctors Fudweiser are identical twins. Didn’t I mention that in the other book?)

Really, you didn’t have to amputate all four legs, complained Doctor Herbert Fudweiser. That was my favourite rat, Jiminy Cricket.

They both stopped and turned to see a tall woman, black cloaked and wearing a black lace veil, with a huge, black, three-legged dog, wearing a cyber purple ruby studded collar, walk past their open door.

What? asked Doctor Rupert Fudweiser, the elder by three minutes, You called a rat Jiminy Cricket?

Herbert continued typing his findings down on his tablet. I’ve given all my rats Disney names. Anyway, you only had to amputate one leg.

Rupert held out his arms, Disney names? What the fluff are you a 10-year-old girl? It was necessary to see how far the diluted Frondee blood worked.

Herbert held out his hands, but with one still holding the tablet obviously. Okay. It’s worked a treat. It’s better than we could have hoped for.

See, Rupert held out his hands and thrust his head forward, all its legs have grown back again. He turned and walked back to his own workstation. This will make us billionaires, no, trillionaires.

Herbert shook his head, We still have to check on the long-term effects.

Long term fluffin’ effects, don’t talk fluffin’ stupid, it’s worked fine with the ageing, it’s worked fine with the regeneration, it’s worked fine with hereditary conditions. What hasn’t it worked fluffin’ fine with?

You’re swearing a lot. I agree, it’s worked fine with everything, but we still have to give it at least five years to see what the long-term effects will be.

Rupert began shouting, Five years, five fluffin’ years? Are you out of your fluffin’ mind?

No, I’m just following trusted scientific procedure.

Trusted scientific procedure is not going to put money in the bank, is not going to fund our research, and is certainly not going to get us a Nobel prize.

Herbert crossed his arms; he thought he had the high ground. That’s all you think about isn’t it, a Nobel Prize?

No, I also think of the trillions of dollars that will buy me the luxury cars, fast cars, planes, tropical islands, land, stately homes, fantastic houses, yachts, and most of all, beautiful women, I deserve.

And I always thought you a scientist of principle, of morals, of wanting to better mankind.

Fluff off you diddyhead. For twenty-five years we’ve been working our gluteus maximuses off in one corporate lab or another, giving them our genius for a pittance of a wage, whilst we’ve made them millions, and been happy, yes happy, when they gave us a two percent bonus every other Christmas, and only then when they didn’t want to pay too much tax. Well, now it’s our turn, none of those corporate bar-stewards will see a penny of this. This is our discovery.

I don’t agree.

What?

We need to do trials, we need to evaluate our findings.

Fluff your trials, fluff your evaluations, fluff your findings, we’re six months away from production.

Herbert was somewhat taken aback. Production, what production?

I’ve been in touch, actually that’s wrong, I’ve signed contracts with manufacturers to produce our serums in great quantities ready for sale, we just needed the final results.

What? I never signed any contracts.

Ah yes, that’s the sticking point.

I’m not following.

I told them you were dead.

What?

And I had sole intellectual and legal rights to our work, because you left them to me in your will.

I haven’t made a will.

You have.

I haven’t. I won’t stand for this. I’m going to tell father. Herbert slowly edged towards the door.

Rupert moved with him. No, you’re not.

Herbert looked towards the door and back to Rupert. I am, you’re not going to get away with this, father will stop you. And ran.

Rupert tripped Herbert who fell and crashed into a metal filing cabinet. Rupert pounced on Herbert, quickly turning him over, sitting on his chest, and placing both knees on Herbert’s shoulders, quickly taking a small gun out of his lab coat pocket, and pointing it at Herbert’s head.

Herbert’s eyes opened wide with shock. Is that father’s gun?

You had the opportunity to come with me, but I knew you’d object, I knew you’d take the moral high ground. I knew you’d be mister goody two shoes.

Are you going to kill me?

Course not. But I will shoot you if you don’t do as I say. I’m just going to lock you away for a little while, until I have everything up and running.

Father will realise something’s wrong when he doesn’t see me for a while?

Don’t you worry your little head about that, we’re identical remember, father was never able to tell the difference, mother could, but father couldn’t. I’ll just pretend to be you. Rupert slowly stood, but still pointing the gun at Herbert’s head, and slowly backed away. Get up, you know where you’re going.

Herbert held up his hands. Where?

Into the basement, I’ve made it nice and comfortable for you.