Love Contrived (Pieces of Dreams)

Name Pronunciation Guide

Aengus eng  iss

Ailill                all yill

  Ardan             are dawn

  Breandan bren dawn

Brian bree an

Cathal ka hal

Cian key in

Cillian kil e an

Darragh          di re

  Diarmuid deer mid

Dubhlainn dove lin

Lorcan             lor can

Malachi          mala ki

Nollaig             null ig

Odhran            o ran

Oisin osh een

  Padraig paw drig

Tierney teer  nee

Aednat ey nit

  Aideen ay deen

Aoibheann eve een

Aoife ee fa

          Aisling AH-shleen

Betha              Beh tha

      Finola       finn  ula

Maeve May V

        Mairi MAH ree

        Mirima Meer  ema

      Siobhan         Shi Vawn

Niamh Nee av

Table of Contents

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Chapter 3

Chapter 4

Chapter 5

Chapter 6

Chapter 7

Chapter 8

Chapter 9

Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Chapter 12

Chapter 13

Chapter 14

Chapter 15

Chapter 16

Chapter 17

Chapter 18

Chapter 19

Chapter 20

Chapter 21

Chapter 22

Chapter 23

Chapter 24

Chapter 25

Chapter 26

Chapter 27

Chapter 28

Acknowledgments

Bibliography

About the Author

Chapter 1

Maeve awoke quite suddenly; some noise outside must have disturbed her sleep.  She lay still as she listened. All she heard was the sound of an owl, rustling in the grass at a distance and a soft conversation of the men near the fire.  She looked around the tent as she thought about their travels that day. This was not the way she and Ardan had traveled before they were married but now they were on the King’s business. She had laughed as the men erected a tent for their shelter. They had a cook with them for meals. Maeve even had a lady-in-waiting to help her during the journey. She had asked Ardan if all this was necessary; he assured her that it was definitely necessary. Now she lay awake in their shelter as Ardan slept peacefully. She moved closer to him to absorb his heat. 

Their bed in the tent was more comfortable than her cots had been at her father’s cottage and Mum’s cottage. Now she and Ardan had a bed in their castle chamber which allowed them to sleep soundly and love each other to the utmost. She thought more about their relationship. They were becoming very close as they learned about each other. They used Betha and Cathal’s relationship as a model for marital harmony. It was working. Maeve never questioned her decision to marry Ardan for she had fallen in love with him long before they wed. He was good to her in the smallest ways. She felt safe with him but she felt loved more than anything else.

She snuggled closer to her husband, closing her eyes. She let the sounds of the night lull her back to sleep. Ardan pulled her closer as they slept.

The morning was cold but the sun shone brightly. Maeve was awakened by Ardan’s movement about the tent.

Wake up, love. We must depart soon.

How long will we be traveling today, Ardan?

All day, but we will arrive at our destination early this evening.

Tell me about our hosts.

We will be visiting Lord Odhran. He has a daughter and son. His wife is his second wife and not the mother of his children.

What is our mission here exactly?

We are bearers of good news. There is no war on the horizon so the lord need not help to raise an army. We are also here to personally invite them to our wedding celebration. The lord’s family and ours have been friends for many years. My brother and I grew up with his children.

I see. What are the names of his children and wife?

His son is Darragh, his daughter Aoibheann, and his wife, Niamh.

Maeve began to repeat the names quietly; Ardan watched her as she walked about talking to herself. 

When did you see them last, love?

I visited about a year ago. Odhran was attempting to marry me to Aoibheann. Both Aoibheann and I laughed at his idea. She was a close friend to Katie, my first wife. She told me she could never take Katie’s place.

Maeve looked closely at Ardan as she attempted to gather the full meaning of what he said.

Was it because you and Katie loved each other that much?

I guess that is what she thought.

Maeve nodded as she pulled her cloak about her.

Maeve, Ardan called as she walked to the opening of the tent. She turned to look at him.

Ardan, I cannot compete with a ghost.

His facial expression was one of pain. His eyes narrowed as he looked at her, Have I ever given you any reason to doubt my love for you, Maeve darling? I told you that I thought I loved Katie until I fell in love with you. I realized then that my love for her was one of friendship and caring; not deep love; not what we have. Please believe me.

Maeve saw from his face that she had hurt him. She moved to him then, putting her hand on his face in an attempt to clear the stormy look, she whispered, I know you love me; I feel it every day. I love you more than I thought I could ever love. Please believe me.

He kissed her then deeply and tenderly. He removed her cloak, turned to the tent opening, closing it and they fell on the bed.

We may be a little late arriving to our destination, Ardan chuckled.

So be it, love.

Having broken their fast, the Prince’s group mounted their horses to begin the final leg of the journey. The servant group stayed behind to clear the camp; they would arrive at the mansion later.  The day was pleasant but cold. Ardan and Maeve rode near each other as much as possible but sometimes it was necessary for one of the men to ride by Ardan to report circumstances of their travels. As those moments occurred Maeve rode near her maid, Mairi .

Mairi was a quiet lady who had been assigned to Maeve once the wedding took place. Maeve felt that Mairi took great care of her, but she often felt that she and Mairi had more in common than Mairi knew. They were low-born, working hard to provide for themselves and the people they served. Now Maeve’s life had shifted dramatically; she was the wife of a prince who would rise to the throne. Maeve wondered if she would ever feel worthy of being the princess.

When they arrived at Lord Odhran’s manor, the lord, his daughter and wife came to meet their guests. The servants bustled about taking Ardan’s and Maeve’s belongings to their guest chamber. A young servant escorted them to their rooms, giving them the times of meals.  Maeve turned to Ardan after the servant left, Aoibheann is very beautiful. Why did you decide not to marry her?

He laughed a bit before saying, I was never in love with her. I was raised in a home where my parents adored each other. Why would I settle for a loveless marriage even with a friend?

Oh I had forgotten momentarily about your parents. They are remarkable in their love for each other. I forget that I am the one who did not observe a marriage as I grew.

Your father never married again after your mother died. That says much about their marriage.

You are right, Ardan; I never thought of it that way, her expression was thoughtful.

I think you have thought of it that way, Maeve. I am certain of it.

She smiled then as she moved into his arms.

This is the safest place I know. How I love to be in your embrace.

Maeve, you are always welcome in my embrace.

Together they laughed, as they began to dress for dinner.

The lord’s table was well set with delicious food but Maeve enjoyed the conversation the most as the lord and Aoibheann told stories of Ardan as a boy. There was laughter as Ardan added his point of view.  Once dinner was complete, they adjourned to the sitting room.

Aoibheann and Maeve sat together in a cozy corner of the room. Maeve thought Aoibheann was very beautiful with her straight dark hair and her dark eyes to match. They spoke of the celebration to come. Aoibheann said she was excited to attend and then she took Maeve’s hand saying, I want to get to know you, Maeve. I think we can become friends. I so want to be friends.

Maeve smiled at the girl, I see no reason why we cannot be friends. Ardan told me something about you today. He said that you and your brother grew up with him and his brother. He said you were close friends with his wife.

He told you that? What else did he say?

He said that your father had always wanted to arrange a marriage between the two of you before he married and then again after his wife died.

Aoibheann took a deep breath, shaking her head.

Yes, my father always thought that was a wise idea but Ardan and I never did. Once he married Katie and after she died, I said I could never take her place but then tonight I met you. I always thought that Katie was his one true love, but Ardan never looked at her the way he looks at you. His eyes never followed her around the room; he never felt the need to just touch her as she sat next to him. Maeve, what you have with Ardan is powerful. I could tell by people’s expressions at dinner that they felt it too. It cannot be denied; your love for each other is palpable.

Maeve seemed embarrassed by this description although she was happy that Aoibheann recognized it. She relaxed a bit as they spoke of more ordinary topics. After a few moments, Lady Niamh came to join them. Maeve enjoyed the conversation with the two ladies and noticed a closeness between the two of them. Aoibheann described how Niamh had come into their family a few years after her mother had died. Niamh said it was difficult in the beginning to start a relationship with the two children of her husband. 

Ardan was seated with Lord Odhran as they discussed the politics of the day, and the war that  was no war. Maeve could only hear brief parts of their conversation; she gave no indication to her companions that she was also listening to Ardan. From time to time Ardan’s eyes would travel to Maeve, as her eyes moved to him.  Had anyone been watching they would have missed the signal between them that it was time to retire. They both excused themselves from their company and rose at the same time. They came together in the room and proceeded to the staircase. Aoibheann smiled as she watched them; her thoughts went to the man she loved and hoped that someday they would be together as husband and wife.

One of the duties of their visit was to greet people from the village. They traveled around talking to the villagers, assuring them that there would be no war. Ardan introduced Maeve as his wife and the people bowed or curtseyed. The men observed Maeve’s beauty as they smiled during the introductions. The women sensed something more than just her beauty. Maeve seemed to be looking about to make sure the people were well. She found time to converse with the some of the women to inquire as to illnesses, births and wounds. She spoke about general concerns of the women such as what herbs to use and boiling water for cleansing. They seemed appreciative of her caring attitude. Ardan noticed how willing the people were to speak with his wife. He could see that she was at times reluctant to leave them; he understood that Maeve felt these people were her people: the people to whom she had wanted to dedicate her life. Ardan had interfered in her life to the point that she could no longer do as she had planned; he did sometimes feel guilt for that but his happiness with his wife dispelled his remorse quickly.

On one of the visits a young woman ran out to Maeve. She had tears running down her cheeks. She curtseyed as she begged Maeve to see her son. Maeve obliged saying, Take me to him.

The woman ran in the direction of her home with Maeve following closely. Ardan watched where they went as he moved in the same path. The child was delirious. He was burning with fever and seemed about three years of age. Maeve gave directions for cloths of cold water for his forehead. He had a cough deep in his chest that interfered with his breathing. She took a vial of crushed herbs from her pocket, giving it to the child mixed with hot broth. Her instructions to the mother were easy to understand but Maeve looked closely at the woman, realizing that she was exhausted.  Maeve moved about the cottage, making a bed for the mother, pouring her a sleeping draught and telling her to rest.

You must take care of yourself so you can care for your child. I am here and I will not leave him. Drink this, it will help you to sleep. Go rest now.

Maeve sat with the child, keeping up with wet cloths for his forehead and water for the boy to drink.

Ardan came to the cottage. He knocked on the door and was surprised that Maeve answered.

Ardan, the mother is asleep but the little boy has a raging fever and I cannot leave. I am trying to draw the heat from his head.

Maeve, are you in need of my help?

No, were you ready to go back to the manor?

Yes, I came for you.

Go back to the manor; I will stay here until morning.

Maeve, I cannot leave you here alone.

I am perfectly fine, Ardan.

No, I will stay with you.

She knew that arguing with him would accomplish nothing so she let him into the cottage.

He watched Maeve care for the child.  After the child awoke coughing, Ardan asked Maeve, What are you giving him?

It is a syrup I made to ease his breathing. It is similar to what I gave Cillian, love, she smiled at Ardan as he squeezed her hand.

I remember what you gave me. It was terrifying being a hunchback because breathing was difficult. The syrup eased the cough making it easier to breathe. Cillian thanks you, love.

Maeve looked at Ardan thinking again how it was still difficult to accept that he was Cillian once.

They sat by the child as they nursed him through the night; his fever broke toward dawn. He began to cry from hunger which woke his mother. She got him some food as Maeve and Ardan prepared to take their leave. The young mother came to Maeve and took her hand, kissing it. She thanked Maeve profusely and curtseyed to both of them.

Ardan shook his head as he and Maeve mounted their horses and rode to the manor house. The house was quiet so they went to their bed chamber to rest. Ardan was quiet, looking at Maeve who was washing before getting into the bed.

Is that what it will be like when we have an ill child?

I would imagine it will be quite like that except as the child’s parents we will be filled with worry.

The boy’s mother was able to sleep.

She was exhausted. I gave her a sleeping draught and she was comforted by my presence.

I see. That makes sense. I look forward to having a child but I do not look forward to the worry.

Yes, worrying about loved ones is difficult.

They fell asleep as soon as they lay upon the bed; Ardan’s arm pulled Maeve to him even in his sleep.

Soon it was time to return to the palace so the final evening turned into a small celebration. This time Lord Ordhan’s son had come home. Darragh was a handsome, very personable young man. He had dark eyes like his father with dark hair and a beard. His eyes were clear and expressive. His personality was full of fun as he teased his father and sister. He shared remembrances of Ardan and Dubhlainn as children.  Maeve had become very observant during the meals. She felt that Aoibheann was keeping a secret of sorts. In their conversations Maeve had gotten the impression that she was in love with someone.

The last evening with this family was enjoyable. After dinner the men sat together and the women adjourned to the corner as usual. Aoibheann and Maeve were expressing their joy in becoming friends. Niamh did not join them immediately so Maeve had an opportunity to ask her new friend the question she had been waiting to ask.

Aoibheann, is there someone special that you would like to bring to our wedding celebration?

Aoibheann looked startled at this question. She took a breath before answering.

No, Maeve, I thank you for offering, but I have no special person in my life thus far.

Oh, I thought you might have someone. You are so beautiful; I am surprised that you do not.

Aoibheann smiled, taking Maeve’s hand, I have had offers but I want more than just a husband. I want love in my marriage. I have had to argue with my father many times over this. Darragh finally spoke to father for me. He relented and promised he would wait until I wanted to marry someone.

Ardan and I have spoken about this often; marriage without love. I cannot begin to think how a life like that would be.

The women joined the men then, completing the evening with merry conversation. Maeve knew she would miss these people but she was eager to return to Betha and Cathal. She had grown to love Ardan’s parents; she missed their company.

Chapter 2

Ardan stood in the copse of trees; he was beginning to sweat, becoming very uncomfortable. He heard a voice calling from a distance, Let go. Let go; it will burn you.

He continued to stand holding it not releasing it or adjusting it in his arms. The voice began to come closer, Let go. It is burning you. Let go. Cannot you feel it burning your arms?

No, you go away. I will not release it.

The voice materialized into a young woman who stood next to Ardan looking intently at him but he did not look at her.

Let go of it. You will be scarred.

He turned then to look at the girl; he was shocked as he stared into the eyes of Katie.

Katie, why are you here?

I am here to warn you, Ardan. It is burning you; let go.

No, Katie, I cannot. Go, now, Katie, go away.

Oh, Ardan, please come with me. I miss you. You can come with me now. We will be happy; but first, you must let go.

Katie, you are among the dead; I am with the living. I cannot go with you; I will not go with you.

Katie’s face clouded with sadness as tears rolled down her cheeks.

You promised to love me forever, Ardan. Come with me now.

Katie, what did you say to me as you lay dying?

I do not recall.

Katie, I said I would love you forever. You told me no. You told me to find my one true love.

I lied, Ardan. You must come with me; I am your one true love.

After she spoke thus, Ardan pushed her away, as he yelled, Get you gone. I have found my one true love. It is not you, ghost, be gone.

The sweat began to pour down through his hair. Ardan pushed the covers off, sitting up he released Maeve. He looked at his sleeping wife and realized that she was burning up.  A quick glance around the room reassured him that he had been dreaming; he went to the water pitcher. He poured water on a cloth and put the cloth on Maeve’s forehead. She moaned under his touch. She was shaking.

He dressed quickly, going in search of his mother. He knocked on her chamber door. Ardan heard movement inside but was surprised when his father answered the door.

Father, is mother awake?

A voice from the bedroom answered him, Ardan, I am awake. What is the trouble?

Mother, it is Maeve. She is burning with fever.

I will be there momentarily. Go back to her, place wet cloths on her head.

I have done that already. I will meet you there.  I am sorry to disturb your rest, Father, Mother.

Cathal smiled as he patted his son on the shoulder, Go back to your wife, son. It is all right.

Ardan ran back to Maeve. 

Cathal turned to his wife, Is there anything that I can do to help?

Yes, wake Mairi and have her come to Maeve’s room.

Betha found Ardan replacing the cloths on his wife’s forehead to keep them cool to the touch. His mother noted his attention to this, wondering where he had learned to do this. Betha looked at Maeve then turned to her son.

Was she in contact with anyone who was ill while you were away?

Yes, a little boy had a fever and harsh cough. We spent the night caring for him while his mother slept. This was all at Maeve’s insistence.

Betha smiled, nodding knowingly. Her new daughter was a caregiver. She would never leave a sick child alone. 

The queen asked Ardan more questions regarding the illness of the child. She listened intently and decided on a remedy for Maeve’s illness. She had Ardan wake Maeve, sit her up so she could get the girl to drink the tea she had made. Maeve did not have a cough which Betha saw as a good sign. She bustled about the room giving instructions to her son. He was wiping Maeve’s arms and legs with cool cloths to reduce the fever.  They made sure she was dry as they wrapped her in heavy blankets.

Mairi knocked on the door. Betha called to the maid to come in. Mairi entered; she looked about in surprise. Betha began explaining to the girl how Maeve was ill and what she needed to do for her. Once Mairi nodded her understanding, Betha summoned Ardan to accompany her back to her room.

The two left Maeve in Mairi ’s capable hands. As they walked along the corridor, Betha asked her son, Ardan, are you feeling all right? You look pale.

I feel fine, Mother. But I need to tell you about my dream.

Betha stopped; she was momentarily astounded that her son was upset by a dream but he definitely was distraught.  She directed him to a small sitting room that was seldom used so they could speak in private.

Tell me, son.

Mother, it was very strange. I have never had a dream like that before. It was as if it was real and not a dream at all.

Tell me all that you remember.

Ardan explained that he was holding something that was very hot in the middle of a circle of trees. He kept hearing a voice telling him to drop it because it was burning him. Once he told Betha that it was Katie talking to him she stopped him.

Katie? Your first wife? Have you been thinking of her lately?

Maeve and I spoke of her because Aoibheann had told Maeve about her.

I see. Go on, finish.

He continued explaining completely how Katie insisted he come with her; that she told him she was his one true love. Ardan was upset reliving this dream. His eyes watered as a tear fell down his cheek.

"Mother, I felt so guilty telling her that I had found the love I sought. I felt terrible sending her