Sad! Donald 'Biff' Trump Is President
By Paul Orwell
()
About this ebook
"An unsettling comparison between the American President and the beefy bully from one of our country's most beloved film franchises." ~Washington Insider
It's no secret that Back to the Future II bully Biff Tannen was inspired by none other than Donald Trump, but few could have predicted just how similar the lives and careers of these two men, one fictional, one scary and real, would be.
Sad! Donald 'Biff' Trump is President compares the two men and catalogs the similarities between them. From the superficial details of height and hair, to the number of wives and treatment of women and to their questionable business practices and political aspirations, this book suggests that America might just have elected Donald 'Biff Tannen' Trump, with no way of going back in time.
"Paul Orwell's short book is more than just a well-written and entertaining attack: it also provides prescriptions for curing our present Trump sickness." ~Luke Rhinehart, author of The Dice Man
Paul Orwell
Paul Orwell has written 3 books about Donald Trump and the impact of Trumpocracy: "Best Library Ever!!! Worst President Ever", "Total Sh*t" and "Sad! Donald 'Biff' Trump is President." He's a centrist who hankers for normalcy in these strangest of times.A businessman and writer living in Washington, D.C. he believes that regular Republicans and Democrats have much more in common than Emperor Don wants them to believe. Orwell yearns to return to world where politicians reach across the aisle, and engage in healthy debate and bi-partisan compromise. He's a fervent fan of George Orwell's writing style and world-view.
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Sad! Donald 'Biff' Trump Is President - Paul Orwell
The striking similarities
between Donald Trump
and bully Biff Tannen
from Back to the Future II
24/7 online chat – rainn.org
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IFF TANNEN, THE BEEFY BULLY from the Back to the Future movie trilogy, and Donald J. Trump are the same man living in different times and different realities. One lives in the 1980s movie franchise, one lives in the White House. They are time-twins. The same man. The Biff Tannen casino owner character in the Back to the Future Part II time-travel scenarios was even based on Donald Trump. Google it!
Skip to the next chapter if you want to dig in and explore the stunning similarities between Biff Tannen and Donald Trump, from their hair to their height to their harems. I’m going to take a moment here to set the context and explain why there’s a serious reason beyond the laughs to compare them. If that’s not for you, take your DeLorean and zoom straight to Chapter 2 at 88 miles per hour.
Let’s start with a couple of quotes about the future:
I try to learn from the past but I plan for the future by focusing exclusively on the present. That’s where the fun is.
and
Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is to not stop questioning.
The first quote doesn’t seem to fully grasp the past, has a hazy vision of the future, and focuses on fun today. It was spoken by Donald J. Trump, or Biff
Trump as I refer to him in this book. Biff
Trump is a low-IQ hustler who was and is an extremely good self-promoter, possibly the best in history. Right now, he happens to be president of the United States. Like a bull in a china shop, he will leave the store with a snort and with shards of broken saucers all over the floor without recognizing the damage he did.
The second quote understands that time is an interconnected continuum and stresses hope and perpetual questioning. It is optimistic and civil. They are the words of Albert Einstein (Einstein is also the name of Doc Brown’s dog in Back to the Future.) Einstein, the man, was a genius who knew more about the nature of time than anyone. Biff Tannen is no genius and Biff
Trump is no Einstein; they can’t fathom time beyond the moment and have the attention span of a goldfish.
Whether we like it or not, none of us can escape our past – we are connected to it and a product of it – but our future is ours to make of it what we will. We might want to change things in our past ... but we can’t. We might want to get a glimpse of the future and see what’s comin’ ... but we can’t do that either. But in the movies WE CAN! In the beloved films of Back to the Future, we travel with Marty McFly as he goes back to the past or forward into the future, making changes that disrupt the space-time continuum.
Along the way Marty bumps into bad guy Biff Tannen, who tangles with him in 1985, 1955, 2015, in a 1985 alternate reality in which Biff has become rich and powerful, 1955 (again), and in 1885 where the bully character is represented by Biff’s great-grandfather Buford Mad Dog
Tannen. In each movie, in all timelines, in every version of Biff, we see a cardboard cut-out and stand-in for Donald Trump. In Back to the Future Part II (or BTTF2, as it’s later abbreviated), the screenwriter used Trump as the inspiration for Biff’s character in the movie’s alternate 1985 timeline.
There are many superficial examinations of these time-twins available to read online (check out the additional reading list provided at the end of this book), but this book will consider larger questions, too, such as What does it mean for us that we elected Biff Tannen as president of the United States?
and Why?
The chapters are self-contained so you can skip among them like Doc Brown skips through time. We’ll start with the basics: the similarities in their looks, lifestyles, and livelihoods; the hair, the casinos, the penthouses. We’ll look at their bullying ways, from signature taunts to aggressive behavior, then examine how the Biffs treat women and how they talk about them. We’ll also compare them as businessmen; both men see business (and life) as a zero-sum game, so in order to win, someone else has to lose.
We’ll also consider how the Biffs relate to small-town America. Biff Tannen lives in Hill Valley, then runs it, and turns it into Hell
Valley. Biff
Trump maintains a pretense of care for the communities in the heartland, but he is, in fact, corrupting them too. If Biff
Trump could make it so, miners in West Virginia would be digging coal into the 2030s even after the rest of the world switched to cheaper and greener electricity.
We’ll also explore whether and how the Trump problem could be fixed if we had a DeLorean and could zip back into the past. Maybe time travel is why we have what we have today – could the Russians or Trump himself have already tried it?
Finally, in the words of that timeless phrase from Ronald Reagan’s 1980 presidential campaign, we’ll consider what it will take to Make America Great Again.
I want to clearly state that I am not anti-Republican; I am anti-liar and anti-bully, regardless of a person’s political persuasion. I am anti-fraud, anti-arrogance, and anti-vanity. I am for fairness, transparency, and intelligence – and I believe that politicians should have heart, empathy, and soul. These things are absent in our current president, who rides roughshod over political convention, common sense, and basic decency. Far from being a great deal-maker, he has polarized Congress to an extraordinary degree. Compromise or even conversation between our two great parties is harder now than ever. If we needed a principled