Michael Jackson Faked his Death

(And I know how to prove it)

Michael Jackson converted to Islam and is hiding in Dubai. He may have also had something to
do with the terrorist message posted on my mirror. First let us analyze the message:

Aaron,
You’re a huge slut bag.
(Heart Symbol) Rachel

If you take the ascii value of each character in the decoded message

65 97 114 111 110 44

89 111 117 114 101 97 104 117 103 101 115 108 117 116 98 97 103 46
82 97 99 104 101 108

Subtract (-3) three for the consonant. Add (+6) for the vowels.

Now, translate it to Russian on babelfish. Then back to English. Then to Arabic, back to English.
This utilizes the weakness in the one-way translation algorithms. Which the terrorists have used
to their advantage.

You get:

MikeJ,
Thanks for the mosque.
(Strange Heart Symbol again) Mamood.

Clearly there was an intentional coded message here. Clearly, Michael Jackson is still alive-
Which is why I heard Billie Jean playing when this act was perpetrated.

Now, onto the important point: How I’m going to catch Michael Jackson.
As illustrated below, I will build various traps and install them in various locations throughout
Dubai, UAE. I believed based on the aforementioned information that Michael Jackson is alive,
well, and hiding in Dubai. Here is an artist’s depiction of the trap:

Michael Jackson will see the vulnerable orphan and instantly feel inclined to intervene. Once he
is within the limits of the net, an operative will pull the rope thus trapping Mr. Jackson and
proving to the world he is infact still alive. No babies will be injured during this process because
they are actually clones of Gary Coleman who in fact themselves are operatives.
Below is a map of where I will be placing these traps:

And finally, an operative took this photo yesterday of Mr. Jackson: